Faith of the Heart
Spoilers: Everything up to Affinity
Pairings: Sam/Jack…
Summary: Jack realises he needs to talk to Sam and turns up at her door, only to be greeted by the person he least wanted to talk to…
A/N: I had the biggest urge to write fan fic all afternoon! So here I am!
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"O'Neill."
Jack looked up at Teal'c who was standing in his doorway.
"T, come in!" Jack said, gratefully shoving away the mission report he was reading and leaning back in his chair.
Teal'c nodded and walked up to Jack's desk, taking a seat in the chair.
"I believe ColonelCarter has informed you that she has accepted PeteShanahan's proposal," Teal'c said.
"Ah, yeah…" Jack said, looking confused.
"I came to see how you were dealing with this information," Teal'c stated.
Jack looked at him curiously. That was the most human thing he'd ever observed Teal'c doing…of course the way he said it was very Jaffa-like.
"I'm fine," Jack said.
"Are you sure?" Teal'c responded immediately.
"Teal'c…" Jack said.
"I did not think you would be pleased to hear this news," Teal'c kept going.
"I'm not!" Jack replied instantly, then rethought his words. "No wait, I am…I'm happy for Carter, Pete will be good for her…"
"Yet you would prefer she was not engaged to PeteShanahan," Teal'c replied.
Jack looked away at his desk. "Maybe."
"Then you should discuss this with ColonelCarter," Teal'c said.
"T, I can't do that," Jack said.
Teal'c remained silent.
The ticking of the small clock sitting on Jack's desk suddenly became extremely loud-sounding.
"Say something!" Jack said.
"Only if you do so to ColonelCarter," Teal'c said, standing up and bowing his head slightly. "I must return to my work."
He turned around and left Jack sitting, alone and confused, at his desk.
OoO
The rain drops bounced off his front windscreen as he watched the windscreen wipers wipe them away. He'd been sitting in the car for over half an hour now, just watching Sam's house, willing her to come out and drive away so he'd have an excuse to not go in there and talk to her.
No such luck yet, and if he didn't switch off the radio and go inside soon his car battery was gonna run out.
He sighed and switched the engine off, jumping out of the car and jogging across the street to Sam's front gate, pushing it open he ran quickly up to her front porch, trying to get rained on as little as possible.
He paused as he reached her front door, his hand poised over the doorbell.
He shouldn't be here. She wasn't his to be protective about. He'd had his life, who was he kidding thinking he could have another shot at a family.
Sam deserved better.
He turned to leave when he heard the door open.
"Colonel O'Neill?"
Jack turned around in surprise of hearing a male voice calling him by his old rank.
Pete.
"Uh, it's General…actually…" Jack replied.
"I knew that…what are you doing here?" Pete asked, opening the door properly.
"Actually, I dunno…" Jack replied, it was a half-truth. "Is Carter home?"
"She's out, but she'll be back soon," Pete said. "You…wanna come in?"
"Uh, actually I should be getting back…" Jack pointed towards Cheyenne Mountain.
"She'll be five minutes," Pete said. "Come on in."
Jack cringed and then nodded, he might as well. Now that he was here.
Not that he'd get much talking done with Pete around.
He walked through the front door, past Pete and into the hallway. He hung his leather jacket on the coat rack as Pete shut the door.
"The kitchen's this way," Pete said.
"I know," Jack replied, re-enforcing the fact that he'd known Sam much longer than Pete had.
He made his way to the kitchen and sat down.
"You want anything to eat?" Pete asked, pulling open Sam's fridge and looking for food.
Jack glared at him for a moment. He was way to comfortable in Sam's house. He wasn't allowed to be comfortable in Sam's house, it was Sam's. He took in a deep breath and pushed aside his thoughts.
"Uh, no, I'm fine," Jack replied.
He didn't like the idea of eating out of Sam's fridge without her permission anymore than he liked the fact that he was sitting here alone with Sam's fiance...
Fiance...
Teal'c was right, he needed to talk to Sam.
Alone.
"I should go," Jack said, standing up.
"No, actually I wanted to talk to you," Pete said.
"Uh, really?" Jack looked extremely confused now.
"Yeah, I…was wondering…look I know it's stupid, but it's just an inkling I get…has anything ever happened between you and Sam, you know…romantically?" Pete looked extremely nervous.
"Why don't you ask her?" Jack replied.
"I have," Pete replied.
"Well what did she say?" Jack said, sitting back down.
"No," Pete said. "But…I don't believe her…"
"You mean you don't trust her," Jack responded.
Pete looked at him. "No! Nothing like that…"
"Then why are you asking me?" Jack asked.
"You love her," Pete stated.
Jack stared him in the eyes. It was a statement, not a question, therefore he wasn't obliged to answer. They heard the door slam shut but neither of them broke their eye contact. Whoever looked away first lost. Jack wasn't going to let him win, not this…and not anything else either.
"Uh, guys…" Sam's voice came from the doorway.
Jack could only imagine how strange the scene must have seemed to her. Her CO and her fiancé glaring at each other in her kitchen.
"What're you doing?" she asked.
"Just talking," Pete replied.
"Having a little chat…" Jack said at the same time. "Actually I was just leaving."
He stood up and pushed the chair back in.
"Just leaving?" Sam looked confused. "Sir, why are you here?"
"I just came to ask you something, but it doesn't matter…I'll see you at work tomorrow," Jack said, he stopped glaring at Pete and turned to look at Sam.
He felt extremely uncomfortable standing there, in between them both.
He walked past a seemingly speechless Sam and straight out of the house, slamming the door shut behind him.
Why did Pete get what he couldn't?
Jack would go to the end of the universe to save her, knowing he could never be with her. Would Pete? He didn't know the answer to that question…
"Sir!"
Great…
Jack stopped and turned around, the rain blurring his vision. Sam jogged towards him, holding out his jacket.
"You forgot this," Sam said.
"Thanks," Jack said, grabbing his jacket and in the process brushing his hand against hers.
He didn't move it, but instead looked up and met her eyes. She was staring at his hand, he could see a thousand emotions running through her mind.
"Don't…" Jack said.
She looked up at him. "Don't what?"
He knew exactly what he was thinking. He didn't want her to marry him, he wanted her to wait until they could be together…
Which would be when?
Just say it Jack!
"Don't marry him," Jack finished his sentence.
"I…" Sam stared into his eyes. "You can't ask me to do that without presenting me with another option…"
"I don't have another option…just don't marry him," Jack said. "Please."
Sam stared at him for a long moment.
Jack pulled his hand away from hers, taking his jacket. "Go inside, you're getting wet…"
"It's a bit late for that," Sam replied.
"It's a bit late for a lot of things, Sam, but that doesn't mean you stop trying to prevent them…" Jack said.
He turned and walked away, leaving her alone in the rain.
OoO
"I believe LieutenantMarks is interesting in you DanielJackson," Teal'c smiled at him.
"Thanks…Teal'c…" Daniel said, throwing a screwed up ball of paper into the air and catching it.
"She has come in here four times in the past hour," Teal'c said.
"Really…I hadn't noticed," Daniel said sarcastically.
"Maybe you should talk to her," Teal'c suggested.
"I did," Daniel replied.
"You merely told her where she could find the equipment she requested from you," Teal'c replied. "You should talk to her properly."
"Have you been reading dating magazines or something?" Daniel asked, staring at his friend.
Teal'c tilted his head slightly. "I have not…"
"Then what's gotten into you?" Daniel asked.
"I do not understand the human practice of ignoring emotions they feel for each other," Teal'c said.
"It's not that simple Teal'c," Sam said from the other end of Daniel's desk.
They both turned to stare at her. The three of them had been sitting in Daniel's office for half an hour but she'd been silent most of the time. Daniel watched as Sam twisted her engagement ring around her finger.
"On the contrary, I believe it is," Teal'c stated.
"Yeah, well you wouldn't understand," Sam muttered, still fiddling with her ring.
"Everything OK?" Daniel asked
"Fine," Sam replied.
"You sure?" Daniel asked.
"Yes, Daniel, I'm sure," Sam said, looking up for the first time.
"OK…" Daniel sounded disbelieving.
"Has O'Neill talked to you?" Teal'c asked after a moment silence.
Sam looked at him in surprise.
"I'll take that as a yes…" Daniel said.
Sam sighed loudly. "I don't know what to do…"
Neither Daniel or Teal'c knew what to say. In the eight years they'd known each other not once had Sam opened up about her feelings for Jack.
"I really don't know who to talk to! Janet's gone, I don't wanna put this on Cassie, I can't exactly talk to Pete about it…I tried to talk to the General, he wasn't very responsive," Sam sighed.
"Well, you have us…" Daniel said.
"Indeed," Teal'c replied.
"Thanks guys…" Sam sighed.
"Why'd you accept Pete's proposal?" Daniel asked.
"I…it's everything I ever wanted," Sam said, truthfully. "So I took it…"
"…and now you're having second thoughts?" Daniel finished.
Sam nodded slightly. "It took me over two weeks to decide…I gave him the opportunity to say something and all he said was 'I wouldn't be here'! What's that supposed to mean? Is that supposed to have some kind of hidden meaning I can't figure out? I don't get it! Why didn't he just say something then?"
She let out a big breath and stared blankly at her desk.
"He did say something, though, didn't he?" Daniel asked.
"Don't marry him…" Sam repeated the words quietly.
Daniel mouthed an 'oh' but didn't know exactly what to say next.
"Morning campers!"
Teal'c and Daniel turned to look at Jack standing in the door. Sam left her back facing him, not wanting to turn around.
"Doing anything exciting?" Jack asked.
"Yes," Daniel said. "We have to go visit someone, don't we Teal'c?"
Teal'c raised an eyebrow, and then smiled slightly. "Indeed."
They both stood up and left extremely quickly.
"Uh…" Jack looked uncomfortable.
He walked over and sat down where Daniel had been a moment earlier, except he pulled his chair closer to the edge of the table.
"Carter…" he said.
"Don't make me chose," she said quietly, looking up, her gaze piercing deeply into him. "Please don't make me chose, I can't chose."
Jack searched her eyes for a long moment. "I'm not."
Sam nodded, looking back down at her hands.
"I love you," he said quietly.
Sam looked up at him sharply. "What?"
There was a sadness echoing within his eyes, he couldn't seem to bring himself to say the words again.
"I…" he stared at her across the books full of ancient texts. "…should go."
"No," Sam said, grabbing his arm as he stood up to leave.
She stood up, still holding his arm.
"Carter, I shouldn't be here…" Jack said.
She couldn't open her mouth. She wanted to tell him she loved him, to tell him that she cared. But she couldn't, thoughts of Pete weighing down on her. That star on Jack's uniform, reminding her he was in the military. She shouldn't have been standing there, her handing clenched tightly around his arm, not wanting to let go.
"Carter…"
"Yes?" she said.
"You're hurting me…" he said, wincing.
"Oh, sorry…"
She lessened her grip on his arm and in the process her hand slipped down his arm to find his hand.
"I don't wanna lose you," she said suddenly.
"You won't," he replied, sounding slightly confused.
"No, I mean…I don't want…I don't want you to be …" Sam paused for a moment, rethinking her sentence. "I'm afraid to be with you because I'm afraid it'll end…"
"It won't end," Jack said.
"You don't know that," Sam said.
"You'll never know if you marry Pete," Jack said.
Sam seemed like she was about to break out in tears. Jack moved forward and placed his arms around her, drawing her into him.
"C'mere…" he whispered.
She leaned into him, putting her arms around him. After a few moments he pulled back slightly, looking into her eyes.
"What I said before was…I love you," he said quietly.
"I know," she whispered. "Me too…"
"Then why are you marrying…him?" Jack asked.
"Because…he…" Sam didn't seem to have an answer.
At that exact moment, with his arms still around her shoulders, staring into Jack's eyes, she knew exactly where she belonged. And it didn't have anything to do with Pete.
She suddenly felt the need to lean forward and kiss him. She looked at his lips. So many hours she'd spent dreaming about this moment, yet here she was, the moment was right, but the emotions were all wrong.
She was supposed to be happy.
She felt him leaning in, his lips brushed hers. She turned her head away.
"I can't…" she said, stepping away from him.
She couldn't look at him, couldn't look at the hurt in his eyes. She'd done so much to hurt him, why did he still care about her?
"You deserve better," she said.
"No, I don't," Jack said. "You're the best anyone could ever have…and if you decide you want to give that to Pete, that's OK with me…"
She searched his eyes for a long moment. "No its not, but thanks for saying it."
She turned around and walked out of the lab. Jack sighed and sat down on Daniel's chair.
It was useless…
He turned around in the chair to find something to fiddle with. He found a small circular object sitting on the table.
Sam's engagement ring.
She'd taken it off and left it on the table…
Jack smiled slightly.
Maybe he had a chance.
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A/N: Thanks for reading guys!! Please review, they make me happy :D
