Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VIII, unfortunately. I'm not that clever or talented. I don't own the characters in this chapter so dun try and sue me and have a hernia. Enjoy! Moki

Broken Doll

I don't know why... But he just couldn't see me for me. He couldn't listen to me when I needed him most. He couldn't love me... ever. I was eighteen and his instructor when I first saw him. He was the quiet and cold type and I could never get a rise out of. I told myself that I just was wanting to be a 'mother figure' and protect him but later I found out that it truly was love that I felt for him. I shut myself down and denied my human desires and emotions to become more like him... more like a robot. It seems that I always have had it hard, though.

I was raised in Edea's Orphanage where I was lovingly referred to as 'Quisty'... I had decided early on that I wanted to become a SeeD and I became one at the ripe age of fifteen. Two years later, after working very hard, I earned my Instructors License and taught at Balamb Garden. My name is Quistis Trepe. Obviously I don't know where or who my family are but that never really stopped me from doing what I needed to do before. However, it never ceases to amaze me how darkness crept my way after losing my affections with Squall Leonhart. He left... with Rinoa Heartilly. And I fell into a great depression... A very frustrating depression. I never understood why I couldn't be the one that he loved. Was it my age? Maybe I wasn't the damsel in distress enough? What did I do.. wrong?

"Quistis.. What are you doing here? We all ready took your Instructor's License." Headmaster Cid spoke behind a folder he was most interested in.

I straightened up slowly and adjusted my glasses, "I know... I've come to get it back. I'm determine to teach here again, sir. I know I can do it and keep it this time."

"Look, I don't know what I can do for you but I'll try and pull some strings. It's going to be hard but we'll see where things go... I thought that you wanted to be a SeeD. That's what you replied when I said we were revoking your license." He put his folder down on his desk and lifted a bushy brow at me.

"I...." I let out a long sigh and looked straight into his eyes, "I did want to be a SeeD. But I need something to keep me sane, Cid. I need to be bossy... I need to be occupied right now and I mean that with all my heart."

"I see. You realize that if you become an instructor again then you'll have to look else where for affections and work very hard at your leadership qualities."

I blushed only a little... I suppose I shouldn't have been taken off guard by his comment. It wasn't very hard to see how I felt about Squall before his love was lavished upon Rinoa.

Cid cleared his throat and leaned back in his chair to look at me quietly, "I'll call you when I know something, all right? Until then you can stay in your old dorm room and look at the new exam study manual." I nodded and got out of my seat, walked out the door and leaned against the wall with my head back. It was going to be even harder than I had thought.