Dream on Baby
I'd like to THANK: FallenFlower-my first ever reviewer sniff, sorry about the format, is it better now?
Away with the Faires4-aw thanks! Your stories aren't bad yourself (yes I really did read them, I'm currently reading 'Story of a Girl')
James-RoxMySox-I was planning to go straight to First Year, but I thought if we saw their fifth birthday would be cute.
Amy Lampion-thanks heaps pal
Chapter 2-Two Very Different Lives
On the eve of young Mr James Potter's fifth birthday, his two very worried parents were in a heated discussion over a rather important matter.
"An-drew! We got him broomsticks last year!"
"A boy can never have too many broomsticks!"
"Andrew! We got him one for his fourth birthday and for Christmas..." her voice rising.
"Alright, don't get your panties in a knot," he stole a glance at his wife, "Sorry," he added quickly, "I was kidding" finishing off his recovery with a blinding smile.
"You've bleached your teeth again."
"What can you do if you drink Tia Talineés Tea and also want white teeth...?"
"That stuff browns your teeth in one cup!"
"My point exactly," sighing into his cup of tea.
"Which is why you don't drink it now!" exclaimed his shocked wife and struggled to carefully twist the cup out of his hand. "Accio cup!"
"Aww Liz..."
"Don't even think about it, think more about your sons birthday present."
"I have. A broomstick!"
The elf who was at the doorway on the verge of bringing him some more tea turned on his heel at the sight of the sparking lady and tip-toed back out, glancing back every couple moments.
"Dipsy! Don't worry about her; she'll be fine in a jiffy! Cup right here please," he indicated to an empty spot on the very cramped table. "Ah, I'll fix that!" He casually waved his hand and all the papers and various objects neatly stacked and ordered themselves on the table. "Right there thank-yooou!" indicating to the exact same spot. "Hmm, a tad more perhaps?" Again, he swished his hand and a generous amount was added to his already filled-to-the-brim cup. "I think I might enlarge the cup," and again, with a swish of his hand the Mega cup was upgraded to a Maxi-size cup.
"Oh Andrew!" She had been silently watching him in shame. "If it wasn't for magic!"
"If it wasn't for magic indeed!" nodding in agreement, "I wouldn't have pearly white teeth and at the same time enjoy the joys of Tia Talineés Tea!
"Oh what the? What do you want to give him?"
"I just think we need to be more creative. What if one year they don't come out with a new broomstick?"
"We'll worry about it then."
"What's that Quidditch team he's so obsessed with?"
He looked up to the chandelier in thought, "Probably Montrose Magpies, he has a taste for the best. Remind me to tell Dipsy that one of the light bulbs need changing"
"Couldn't you use magic?" She stared at him as if he had been blasted with Oblivious.
"Hm...these are muggle light bulbs"
"Are you feeling alright? Who says you can't use magic to change muggle things?"
"Nobody! I just prefer to stick with muggle things when using muggle things"
She sighed, figuring she had lost this argument, "I don't care! As long as you get Dipsy to do it and you watch him and help him which he most likely needs!"
"Really? That's odd! I'm sure your family didn't support them...wasn't it the Prides?"
"Oh them! Yeh...that was before their chaser-Catriona McCormack went off and got married and then her daughter coming to play with them!"
His wife looked blankly at him for a second, "Oh dear..."
"Too true! She was much too busy fretting over her daughter to care about the bloody quaffle!" He gripped his red leather armchair in anger as he remembered that fateful day-when the Prides lost because McCormack had completely forgotten about the quaffle at the crucial point, giving the game away to the Wasps.
"No need to raise your voice dear, especially with that language of yours!" she patted his arm sympathetically. "Well to be honest, wouldn't you worry if James played with you in one of the most dangerous sports in the world?"
"I'd encourage him to whack their heads off before they got his!" gesturing to indicate visually what he meant.
"Da-vid! That's not the attitude!"
"Sorry," he dipped his head, pouted a little and looked sadly at his wife.
"Don't give me that! We still have a son's present to decide!"
"How about this. I'll give him a broomstick-how about a Cleansweep-cleanly sweep up his remains-ha!-I'm only kidding dear...Nimbus 1000, they're the newest ones out!" he settled back into his chair.
"B-but...that's a real broomstick!" his wife stared disbelievingly, she on the other hand, sat straight up.
"He's five! He can handle it!" her husband didn't think there was anything strange with it.
"Oh...I wouldn't be too sure...Can't we just get him the toy version of Nimbus 1000?"
"Sorry dear, gave him that last year," he yawned and waited for her to give in.
"Oh...," her face clouded with doubt and anxiety.
"He'll be fine! Anyway, you can get him tickets to the Montrose Magpies game," he waved it off to her with his hand.
"Oh...lovely...that'll just give him more the reason to use that stick!"
"Broomstick dear. How about this? By the way, can I come too? I want to see how the Magpies whoop the Arrows." He chuckled, "Ah...that last game was funny, no doubt Magpies ah premier favourites winning it thirty-two times already...Oh yes," catching a glare from his wife, "I will watch him for the first week every time he uses that stick," he sat back into his chair, satisfied at his win.
"First two months," she bargained
"Month."
"Seven weeks," her eyes narrowing dangerously
"Six weeks."
"You're pushing it...fine!"
And her husband looked up to the ceiling mournfully, dangling his arms over the chair, thinking at how much time he had sacrificed from playing polo.
"And you are not to take him out for midnight rides!" she said, continuing to drill him.
"Honey, that's the only way to prepare him for those midnight Quidditch games..."
His wife shot him another dangerous look.
"Ok dear, about his birthday party...should we have it in the usual Botanical Gardens...we could portkey down everyone-though last time was a rather close call-it's nice there, but I really hate having to oblivate the really nice people...who knows who'll be there this time...or we could have it in our Belle Courtyard, you know the one with the quaffle posts hung up...though I don't think the two and a half acres is merely enough for the boys to run around in..."
In the other side of the Hampshire estate, a small black-haired boy settled into his bed with a grin like as big as the moon's crescent.
Half a year later...things were, let's say, rather different...
In a humble cottage of Devon, two young parents were tossing and turning over their young daughter's fifth birthday.
The originally-dirty-brown haired man turned to face his wife in their squishy bed, "Whacha going to get for Lily?"
His wife laid in her bed and looked up at the glow-in-the-dark stars stuck on the ceiling, "To be honest, I was going to get her a Barbie, isn't it a pity she's not like other little girls?"
"Yeh...," her husband sighed and turned back over to face the eerily bright yellow stars.
"Do you remember last year..."
"Oh...yes...quite clearly..."
And they both sighed.
"Lily!"
A small girl turned around from her gathering of flowers to face her parents and a small group of friends who had tightly gathered themselves around a small table.
"Come over here Lily, your friends have something to give you. Isn't so sweet of them?"
She skipped over the lush-green grass with its random dandelions and flowers, her two red plaits bouncing behind her back, her polka-dot dress flapping as she skipped.
"What is it...?" she asked shyly. She softly treaded the grass until she reached the table.
"Happy Birthday!" the kids turned around and placed colourful shiny hats on the heads and started singing Happy Birthday to Lily.
"What do you think Lily?" her father had her arm around his wife and bent down to be eye-level with Lily.
"Thanks dad, thanks mum," she answered quietly and quickly gave each a tight hug.
Her parents silently stepped back and watched the children play. They watched Lily laugh gently at her friends jokes and her grin broaden as each present was passed into her hands. Time passed and it was time for her friends to go home. They greeted, they bid goodbye.
"Bye Lily!" "Have a great birthday Lily darling, be a good boy and say bye bye Sam" "See ya later"
"Lily do you want to go on the slide again before you go home? Take Petunia with you too."
The two girls trooped off playfully making fun of each other. The young couple looked at each other and smiled.
"Carrot-head!" and the group of four-year-old boys broke out in laughter.
The red-head stopped and turned around, her green eyes silencing and chilling the laughing boys' blood.
"Ha...ha...we were...uh...only...uh...kidding!"
And their noses were broken and possibly lost their manhood too. But they wouldn't figure that out until a decade later.
"Her tempers as red as her hair."
"That's really not all that funny."
He sighed. "What should we give her? Some lavender scents?"
She twisted around to face him and gave him a playful glare, "Not funny again."
"What it would be good for her, she can have better sleep too!"
An eyebrow rose.
"Well uh, I heard somewhere that if you sniffed lavender it would make you kinda like drowsy..."
"Sounds like some drug to me."
"It's a flower Rose dear, you should know from your line of flowers."
Bad move by her husband. He copped a mouth full of pillow fluff. And part of the ceiling came crashing down.
"Rosie..."
They both looked over their shoulder to the corner where they saw a great gaping hole with plasterboard dust still floating softly to the ground.
"It's like a White Christmas...," her mind dazing away...
"Rosie! Where do you live again?"
They both inspected the site again, noticing the corner had just caved in and broken off in one piece. They looked up and saw little cracks forming all across their white Victorian decorated ceiling. The light bulb shivered as a crack ran along its silver back.
"Oooh..." his mouth still in the form of the O. "Oh dear," her mind finally registering what was happening, "Let's duck out honey..."
They both softly treaded the hard carpet, careful not to cause any movement that would make it crack any further, and into the lounge.
"What are we going to do?" she wailed under her breath. She covered her face with her hands in distraught. Her husband comforted her, patting her lightly on the back.
"I'll fix it up tomorrow, don't worry."
"Let's worry about Lily's present first shall we?"
"And our bed?" he asked. She indicated to the wrinkly grey lounge.
"I'll get some blankets k? Meanwhile, please think of some ideas!"
He looked at the retreating back with raised eyebrows, shrugged, and made himself comfortable in the couch, conveniently taking up most of the room. His eyes lightly scanned across the grey cluttered flower print swag and tail curtains, to the painted wooden window that has expanded-and- contracted once too many times, 'So that's where all that white flaky stuff has been coming from,...mental note: must apologise to Rosie for going off at her for leaving talcum powder around the house, buy some deodoriser for the Rosie/house and waterproof that window!' he thought, 'And clean it too,' noticing the grubby marks on the fossil. He continued to inspect, noticing a crack the width of a piece of hair in the browning-white striped wallpaper. He sighed.
"Aww...you poor baby! You've thought about Lily's present so hard you're sighing!" she said dumping a blanket on him and snuggling into one herself.
"Mmm...Hmm...," he nodded his head, careful not to look her way, let alone catch her eye.
"Look at me..."
"Um...I'm feeling a little tired..." he closed his eyes
"David..."
"Yeh...uh, care to finish this conversation tomorrow?"
"Try again!" she leaned over to him and forced open his eyes.
He opened his eyes to find her face on top of his, "Argh...you scared me..." he said sarcastically.
"I will next time if you won't start paying attention."
"You know, no-ones really spoken to me since that teacher in yr 4...Mrs Biddle?"
"Mrs Biddle?" her lower jaw dropped to the floor.
"Yeh," satisfied with her reaction.
"Honey...we need a present for Lily dear..." she sweetly said, fluttering her eyelashes.
"That doesn't work for me-"
"Anymore!"
"Ok...ok...hey what's that plastic thing that all her friends are crazy about?" He pulled up his blanket thinking they were nearly finished.
"Hers or Petunias?"
"Um..."
"Petunia's dear. And those plastic things are Barbies."
"I think it's immoral for little girls to play with those things. Have you seen those things? Those extra large boobs...those hot legs and her face! She is like every little girl's dream I'd think! My dream anyway-"
"Hey!"
"Kidding..., but she is hot in that sense...I mean like, if she was real...she'd have all, I mean many, I mean some guys chasing her..."
"She can't be real anyway."
"Why, because if she exists, all the girls would kill her out of jealousy?"
"Haha...no...more like her body is out of proportion and that she'd topple because those hot legs can't support the weight of those extra large boobs."
He stared at her in shock and then broke out in laughter.
"Shush David, girls are sleeping...silently!"
"Are – you – kidding - me?" He was still shaking in laughter.
"No."
"I have never in my life heard of someone not being able to support the weight of their boobs."
"That's because they're non-existent. How many Barbie's do you actually think are in the world?"
"Oh um...the plastic things? I don't know. I'd guess about...let's see, about half our population are female..." he said ticking off his fingers as he went, "I'd say about a sixth are people-who-play-with-Barbie ages...and there's a good trillion and a half in this world...I'd say...oh and a girl must have more than one Barbie...I'd say...You could search on the internet."
She rolled her eyes, "People David! How many brain cells do you exactly own at the moment?"
"I'll check tomorrow."
She sighed and settled into another position.
"She likes to read," she stated succinctly
"Yeh...those caterpillar and the 'Once an old lady swallowed a fly books', I don't think that's the best for her dear," he replied with eyebrows raised.
"No, no," she sat up straight again, "Have you noticed lately that she's starting to read the labels on her cereal?"
"Oh so is her vocab the length of Coco-pops to Weet-bix, with her favourite word being Fruit-loops."
"Not yet, I'm not placing a bet on it being not though."
"That's just great."
"So I was thinking along the lines of Dr Suess..."
"Green eggs and ham?" he turned around so she could see his horrified face, "I don't want to have to food dye her food so that she'll eat it!"
"I'll do that job."
"No! As much as you and I love Dr Suess, she's too young to understand."
"It's EASY to read."
"I'll agree with you on that one, but I wasn't thinking of getting her to read the book yet!"
"Oh..." her eyebrows narrowed in thought.
"Remember the Little Mermaid..."
She sighed and closed her eyes, "Yes..."
"Well I thought we should start off reading to her, ok, so I'm sure she'd like to join in, but still...I don't want her to group up too quickly!"
She thought about it and agreed.
"That is awesome, let's get her a special edition one...one with the nice leather covers...I'm sure we can afford it once in a while...we'll just have to cut back...on the types of cereal we buy! Go no-brand!"
She leaned back and thought, "Yeh...so she grows up thinking she'll live happily ever after?"
And how wrong Rose Evans was...
A/N: Ok, all get your guns out and shoot me. I am so sorry, I hit a very cluttered part of my life, and everyday seemed to be piled with more and MORE homework. I'm very happy though now, I managed-netball training at 6- 45 in the morning, a maths competition, my DT project that had to be handed in, an English oral assessment and a swimming race where I did 4 events in after training, with waking up at 3 in the morning because my body clock is out of batteries. Trust me, I was not a happy Jan on Thursday. But I'm here now!! Another thing, I'm planning to update once every 2 weeks, I'm really sorry, this week I have a Jap test and next week I have a Science and as much as I love science, I'm not very good at it, so I'll have to hit the books! Today, marks the celebration of my new computer, that is why I made a super special effort to update. It helps when you have no outstanding homework:D. Of course, what spurred me the most and made me think not to give up were my 4 great reviewers-FallenFlower, Away with the Fairies, James-RoxMySox and Amy Lampion (and check out their stories while you're at it, their author names are as I've put them). Sorry, please excuse any spelling/grammar errors, I was in such a rush to post this, I haven't actually proofread this yet. Heheh...Sorry-once my updating starts to get more regular and when I suffer from writer's block, I think I might read back. But, if anybody spots a super huge error, I wouldn't mind you telling me, if you can't be bothered, don't worry about it. Star xx
I'd like to THANK: FallenFlower-my first ever reviewer sniff, sorry about the format, is it better now?
Away with the Faires4-aw thanks! Your stories aren't bad yourself (yes I really did read them, I'm currently reading 'Story of a Girl')
James-RoxMySox-I was planning to go straight to First Year, but I thought if we saw their fifth birthday would be cute.
Amy Lampion-thanks heaps pal
Chapter 2-Two Very Different Lives
On the eve of young Mr James Potter's fifth birthday, his two very worried parents were in a heated discussion over a rather important matter.
"An-drew! We got him broomsticks last year!"
"A boy can never have too many broomsticks!"
"Andrew! We got him one for his fourth birthday and for Christmas..." her voice rising.
"Alright, don't get your panties in a knot," he stole a glance at his wife, "Sorry," he added quickly, "I was kidding" finishing off his recovery with a blinding smile.
"You've bleached your teeth again."
"What can you do if you drink Tia Talineés Tea and also want white teeth...?"
"That stuff browns your teeth in one cup!"
"My point exactly," sighing into his cup of tea.
"Which is why you don't drink it now!" exclaimed his shocked wife and struggled to carefully twist the cup out of his hand. "Accio cup!"
"Aww Liz..."
"Don't even think about it, think more about your sons birthday present."
"I have. A broomstick!"
The elf who was at the doorway on the verge of bringing him some more tea turned on his heel at the sight of the sparking lady and tip-toed back out, glancing back every couple moments.
"Dipsy! Don't worry about her; she'll be fine in a jiffy! Cup right here please," he indicated to an empty spot on the very cramped table. "Ah, I'll fix that!" He casually waved his hand and all the papers and various objects neatly stacked and ordered themselves on the table. "Right there thank-yooou!" indicating to the exact same spot. "Hmm, a tad more perhaps?" Again, he swished his hand and a generous amount was added to his already filled-to-the-brim cup. "I think I might enlarge the cup," and again, with a swish of his hand the Mega cup was upgraded to a Maxi-size cup.
"Oh Andrew!" She had been silently watching him in shame. "If it wasn't for magic!"
"If it wasn't for magic indeed!" nodding in agreement, "I wouldn't have pearly white teeth and at the same time enjoy the joys of Tia Talineés Tea!
"Oh what the? What do you want to give him?"
"I just think we need to be more creative. What if one year they don't come out with a new broomstick?"
"We'll worry about it then."
"What's that Quidditch team he's so obsessed with?"
He looked up to the chandelier in thought, "Probably Montrose Magpies, he has a taste for the best. Remind me to tell Dipsy that one of the light bulbs need changing"
"Couldn't you use magic?" She stared at him as if he had been blasted with Oblivious.
"Hm...these are muggle light bulbs"
"Are you feeling alright? Who says you can't use magic to change muggle things?"
"Nobody! I just prefer to stick with muggle things when using muggle things"
She sighed, figuring she had lost this argument, "I don't care! As long as you get Dipsy to do it and you watch him and help him which he most likely needs!"
"Really? That's odd! I'm sure your family didn't support them...wasn't it the Prides?"
"Oh them! Yeh...that was before their chaser-Catriona McCormack went off and got married and then her daughter coming to play with them!"
His wife looked blankly at him for a second, "Oh dear..."
"Too true! She was much too busy fretting over her daughter to care about the bloody quaffle!" He gripped his red leather armchair in anger as he remembered that fateful day-when the Prides lost because McCormack had completely forgotten about the quaffle at the crucial point, giving the game away to the Wasps.
"No need to raise your voice dear, especially with that language of yours!" she patted his arm sympathetically. "Well to be honest, wouldn't you worry if James played with you in one of the most dangerous sports in the world?"
"I'd encourage him to whack their heads off before they got his!" gesturing to indicate visually what he meant.
"Da-vid! That's not the attitude!"
"Sorry," he dipped his head, pouted a little and looked sadly at his wife.
"Don't give me that! We still have a son's present to decide!"
"How about this. I'll give him a broomstick-how about a Cleansweep-cleanly sweep up his remains-ha!-I'm only kidding dear...Nimbus 1000, they're the newest ones out!" he settled back into his chair.
"B-but...that's a real broomstick!" his wife stared disbelievingly, she on the other hand, sat straight up.
"He's five! He can handle it!" her husband didn't think there was anything strange with it.
"Oh...I wouldn't be too sure...Can't we just get him the toy version of Nimbus 1000?"
"Sorry dear, gave him that last year," he yawned and waited for her to give in.
"Oh...," her face clouded with doubt and anxiety.
"He'll be fine! Anyway, you can get him tickets to the Montrose Magpies game," he waved it off to her with his hand.
"Oh...lovely...that'll just give him more the reason to use that stick!"
"Broomstick dear. How about this? By the way, can I come too? I want to see how the Magpies whoop the Arrows." He chuckled, "Ah...that last game was funny, no doubt Magpies ah premier favourites winning it thirty-two times already...Oh yes," catching a glare from his wife, "I will watch him for the first week every time he uses that stick," he sat back into his chair, satisfied at his win.
"First two months," she bargained
"Month."
"Seven weeks," her eyes narrowing dangerously
"Six weeks."
"You're pushing it...fine!"
And her husband looked up to the ceiling mournfully, dangling his arms over the chair, thinking at how much time he had sacrificed from playing polo.
"And you are not to take him out for midnight rides!" she said, continuing to drill him.
"Honey, that's the only way to prepare him for those midnight Quidditch games..."
His wife shot him another dangerous look.
"Ok dear, about his birthday party...should we have it in the usual Botanical Gardens...we could portkey down everyone-though last time was a rather close call-it's nice there, but I really hate having to oblivate the really nice people...who knows who'll be there this time...or we could have it in our Belle Courtyard, you know the one with the quaffle posts hung up...though I don't think the two and a half acres is merely enough for the boys to run around in..."
In the other side of the Hampshire estate, a small black-haired boy settled into his bed with a grin like as big as the moon's crescent.
Half a year later...things were, let's say, rather different...
In a humble cottage of Devon, two young parents were tossing and turning over their young daughter's fifth birthday.
The originally-dirty-brown haired man turned to face his wife in their squishy bed, "Whacha going to get for Lily?"
His wife laid in her bed and looked up at the glow-in-the-dark stars stuck on the ceiling, "To be honest, I was going to get her a Barbie, isn't it a pity she's not like other little girls?"
"Yeh...," her husband sighed and turned back over to face the eerily bright yellow stars.
"Do you remember last year..."
"Oh...yes...quite clearly..."
And they both sighed.
"Lily!"
A small girl turned around from her gathering of flowers to face her parents and a small group of friends who had tightly gathered themselves around a small table.
"Come over here Lily, your friends have something to give you. Isn't so sweet of them?"
She skipped over the lush-green grass with its random dandelions and flowers, her two red plaits bouncing behind her back, her polka-dot dress flapping as she skipped.
"What is it...?" she asked shyly. She softly treaded the grass until she reached the table.
"Happy Birthday!" the kids turned around and placed colourful shiny hats on the heads and started singing Happy Birthday to Lily.
"What do you think Lily?" her father had her arm around his wife and bent down to be eye-level with Lily.
"Thanks dad, thanks mum," she answered quietly and quickly gave each a tight hug.
Her parents silently stepped back and watched the children play. They watched Lily laugh gently at her friends jokes and her grin broaden as each present was passed into her hands. Time passed and it was time for her friends to go home. They greeted, they bid goodbye.
"Bye Lily!" "Have a great birthday Lily darling, be a good boy and say bye bye Sam" "See ya later"
"Lily do you want to go on the slide again before you go home? Take Petunia with you too."
The two girls trooped off playfully making fun of each other. The young couple looked at each other and smiled.
"Carrot-head!" and the group of four-year-old boys broke out in laughter.
The red-head stopped and turned around, her green eyes silencing and chilling the laughing boys' blood.
"Ha...ha...we were...uh...only...uh...kidding!"
And their noses were broken and possibly lost their manhood too. But they wouldn't figure that out until a decade later.
"Her tempers as red as her hair."
"That's really not all that funny."
He sighed. "What should we give her? Some lavender scents?"
She twisted around to face him and gave him a playful glare, "Not funny again."
"What it would be good for her, she can have better sleep too!"
An eyebrow rose.
"Well uh, I heard somewhere that if you sniffed lavender it would make you kinda like drowsy..."
"Sounds like some drug to me."
"It's a flower Rose dear, you should know from your line of flowers."
Bad move by her husband. He copped a mouth full of pillow fluff. And part of the ceiling came crashing down.
"Rosie..."
They both looked over their shoulder to the corner where they saw a great gaping hole with plasterboard dust still floating softly to the ground.
"It's like a White Christmas...," her mind dazing away...
"Rosie! Where do you live again?"
They both inspected the site again, noticing the corner had just caved in and broken off in one piece. They looked up and saw little cracks forming all across their white Victorian decorated ceiling. The light bulb shivered as a crack ran along its silver back.
"Oooh..." his mouth still in the form of the O. "Oh dear," her mind finally registering what was happening, "Let's duck out honey..."
They both softly treaded the hard carpet, careful not to cause any movement that would make it crack any further, and into the lounge.
"What are we going to do?" she wailed under her breath. She covered her face with her hands in distraught. Her husband comforted her, patting her lightly on the back.
"I'll fix it up tomorrow, don't worry."
"Let's worry about Lily's present first shall we?"
"And our bed?" he asked. She indicated to the wrinkly grey lounge.
"I'll get some blankets k? Meanwhile, please think of some ideas!"
He looked at the retreating back with raised eyebrows, shrugged, and made himself comfortable in the couch, conveniently taking up most of the room. His eyes lightly scanned across the grey cluttered flower print swag and tail curtains, to the painted wooden window that has expanded-and- contracted once too many times, 'So that's where all that white flaky stuff has been coming from,...mental note: must apologise to Rosie for going off at her for leaving talcum powder around the house, buy some deodoriser for the Rosie/house and waterproof that window!' he thought, 'And clean it too,' noticing the grubby marks on the fossil. He continued to inspect, noticing a crack the width of a piece of hair in the browning-white striped wallpaper. He sighed.
"Aww...you poor baby! You've thought about Lily's present so hard you're sighing!" she said dumping a blanket on him and snuggling into one herself.
"Mmm...Hmm...," he nodded his head, careful not to look her way, let alone catch her eye.
"Look at me..."
"Um...I'm feeling a little tired..." he closed his eyes
"David..."
"Yeh...uh, care to finish this conversation tomorrow?"
"Try again!" she leaned over to him and forced open his eyes.
He opened his eyes to find her face on top of his, "Argh...you scared me..." he said sarcastically.
"I will next time if you won't start paying attention."
"You know, no-ones really spoken to me since that teacher in yr 4...Mrs Biddle?"
"Mrs Biddle?" her lower jaw dropped to the floor.
"Yeh," satisfied with her reaction.
"Honey...we need a present for Lily dear..." she sweetly said, fluttering her eyelashes.
"That doesn't work for me-"
"Anymore!"
"Ok...ok...hey what's that plastic thing that all her friends are crazy about?" He pulled up his blanket thinking they were nearly finished.
"Hers or Petunias?"
"Um..."
"Petunia's dear. And those plastic things are Barbies."
"I think it's immoral for little girls to play with those things. Have you seen those things? Those extra large boobs...those hot legs and her face! She is like every little girl's dream I'd think! My dream anyway-"
"Hey!"
"Kidding..., but she is hot in that sense...I mean like, if she was real...she'd have all, I mean many, I mean some guys chasing her..."
"She can't be real anyway."
"Why, because if she exists, all the girls would kill her out of jealousy?"
"Haha...no...more like her body is out of proportion and that she'd topple because those hot legs can't support the weight of those extra large boobs."
He stared at her in shock and then broke out in laughter.
"Shush David, girls are sleeping...silently!"
"Are – you – kidding - me?" He was still shaking in laughter.
"No."
"I have never in my life heard of someone not being able to support the weight of their boobs."
"That's because they're non-existent. How many Barbie's do you actually think are in the world?"
"Oh um...the plastic things? I don't know. I'd guess about...let's see, about half our population are female..." he said ticking off his fingers as he went, "I'd say about a sixth are people-who-play-with-Barbie ages...and there's a good trillion and a half in this world...I'd say...oh and a girl must have more than one Barbie...I'd say...You could search on the internet."
She rolled her eyes, "People David! How many brain cells do you exactly own at the moment?"
"I'll check tomorrow."
She sighed and settled into another position.
"She likes to read," she stated succinctly
"Yeh...those caterpillar and the 'Once an old lady swallowed a fly books', I don't think that's the best for her dear," he replied with eyebrows raised.
"No, no," she sat up straight again, "Have you noticed lately that she's starting to read the labels on her cereal?"
"Oh so is her vocab the length of Coco-pops to Weet-bix, with her favourite word being Fruit-loops."
"Not yet, I'm not placing a bet on it being not though."
"That's just great."
"So I was thinking along the lines of Dr Suess..."
"Green eggs and ham?" he turned around so she could see his horrified face, "I don't want to have to food dye her food so that she'll eat it!"
"I'll do that job."
"No! As much as you and I love Dr Suess, she's too young to understand."
"It's EASY to read."
"I'll agree with you on that one, but I wasn't thinking of getting her to read the book yet!"
"Oh..." her eyebrows narrowed in thought.
"Remember the Little Mermaid..."
She sighed and closed her eyes, "Yes..."
"Well I thought we should start off reading to her, ok, so I'm sure she'd like to join in, but still...I don't want her to group up too quickly!"
She thought about it and agreed.
"That is awesome, let's get her a special edition one...one with the nice leather covers...I'm sure we can afford it once in a while...we'll just have to cut back...on the types of cereal we buy! Go no-brand!"
She leaned back and thought, "Yeh...so she grows up thinking she'll live happily ever after?"
And how wrong Rose Evans was...
A/N: Ok, all get your guns out and shoot me. I am so sorry, I hit a very cluttered part of my life, and everyday seemed to be piled with more and MORE homework. I'm very happy though now, I managed-netball training at 6- 45 in the morning, a maths competition, my DT project that had to be handed in, an English oral assessment and a swimming race where I did 4 events in after training, with waking up at 3 in the morning because my body clock is out of batteries. Trust me, I was not a happy Jan on Thursday. But I'm here now!! Another thing, I'm planning to update once every 2 weeks, I'm really sorry, this week I have a Jap test and next week I have a Science and as much as I love science, I'm not very good at it, so I'll have to hit the books! Today, marks the celebration of my new computer, that is why I made a super special effort to update. It helps when you have no outstanding homework:D. Of course, what spurred me the most and made me think not to give up were my 4 great reviewers-FallenFlower, Away with the Fairies, James-RoxMySox and Amy Lampion (and check out their stories while you're at it, their author names are as I've put them). Sorry, please excuse any spelling/grammar errors, I was in such a rush to post this, I haven't actually proofread this yet. Heheh...Sorry-once my updating starts to get more regular and when I suffer from writer's block, I think I might read back. But, if anybody spots a super huge error, I wouldn't mind you telling me, if you can't be bothered, don't worry about it. Star xx
