Disclaimer: I don't own Trek… if I did, I probably wouldn't know what to do with it.
Author's note: Yes, I know… it's not really Chaucerian… but I liked the idea for a title… and it sort of went on from there. TLI, the Shakespearian influence could be a result of a little Much Ado About Nothing a mere hours before I wrote this. But I'm having fun with it. Sorry about delays in updating (in all my stuff) but I've added about 15 hours of school (not including homework) to my 40 hour work week… and work and school must take precedence over fanfiction (sigh). The only bonus is that I've now gone portable… so I can work while I'm not at home… a major bonus. Thanks, as always, to my beta readers... what would I do without you?
C.
Though many tale speaks of the captain
Noble and true (though highly driven)
Commander, Ensign, and Lieutenant
(To whom no disrespect is meant)
They all are men1 and have desires
To which this office does aspire
To meet and if it can exceed
Every whim and taste and need.
Ours is not an easy task
To know their wish before they ask
To know just what they will require
From this vast Supply empire
While some things are always clear
Like uniforms, and vent'ring gear
Other things are quite for sure
Much harder for one to procure
Thus those who be both wise and smart
Take great pains to winneth my heart
And those that would be made a fool
Do violate the simple rule
Of slighting not the one who knows
Where ev'ry single item goes
And has the means to make a life
Be simple, or be filled with strife
For it is my sole volition
How to fill each requisition
And one who keeps my humour
Will find their needs filled sooner
But those with manners curt and vile
May find that it might take a while
To receive that which they request
Or something else, as I see best
So heed my words and mind your manners
And you won't get socks, instead of scanners
1 Men is being used in the classical sense here… as in Mankind referring not just to males, but to all humans. So don't panic… I know that there are women involved.
