New Theme Song Intro –

Animal Crossing: Reality TV!

See what you can find and see what you can see!

Look up there or in a tree,

just become who you were born to be!

And now our wonderful host... Tom Nook!

Tom Nook: Thank you, thank you, and welcome to our greatest episode yet. In this Reality TV Episode we will be remodeling a well known citizen's house. His name is Ricky, and he's one tough squirrel. So get ready for fun! Also, let me point out that instead of commercials we're going to have facts about Animal Crossing you never knew. Now, let's get started. We've got our crew here. Wendell will be our wallpaper man, Sahara here will be our carpet man, and I will provide the furniture. For this episode I'll have some specialty furniture you haven't seen anywhere else! That goes for Wendell and Sahara too. It's up to Ricky here to provide all the money for us. But, he cannot use any money he already has. So before we start we need Ricky to go on a money sprint. He has ten minutes to get at least 10,000 bells. Are you ready, Ricky?

Ricky: Yeah, whatever.

Tom Nook: Then GO!

Ricky hurries off to a nearby stream, where he gets out his fishing pole. He catches a small bass. He throws it back in and goes down to the sea. He catches a sea bass and keeps it. He casts it out again and gets a red snapper. He casts it out once again, and gets a barred knifejaw. He then goes to the police station where a piece of furniture, a piece of paper, a carpet, and a shirt are. He gets all of these items and exits the store.

Tom Nook: (Shouting) You have seven minutes left!

Ricky hurries to the dump, where he collects two shirts and a pad of paper. He makes his way to Tom Nook's store, and cashes in everything.

Tom Nook: You get 9,999 bells. You need one more! Hurry! You have four minutes!

Ricky goes outside in a mad dash and grabs an apple from a tree. But while he gets it suddenly a tornado hits the ground right where he is standing and sends him flying all the way to the sea. He rushes back towards Tom Nook's store, but villagers are lined up to block him. They start throwing shards of glass at him. He dodges all of the except one which cuts his tail.

Ricky: All right you guys! Let me through!

Villagers: Never!

The villagers charge Ricky. He climbs up a tree and jumps over them. Now nothing is in his way. He reaches Tom Nook's store, opens the door, and chucks the apple at Tom Nook.

Tom Nook: You did it! You only had .001 seconds left, but you made it!

Ricky: OK. Good. Can I go home now?

Tom Nook: No, we need to remodel your home, remember?

Ricky: Oh yeah. "Sigh"

Tom Nook: I thought you wanted your house to be remodeled?

Ricky: Nope. Nobody even asked me.

Tom Nook: Oh, well... tough luck for you then. "Snicker" See ya later.

Ricky: Argh. Everyone's so mean.

Just then, Tom Nook's roof cracks and a chunk falls out, flattening Ricky.

Tom Nook: Ah! My roof! Someone, help! Timmy, Tommy!

Timmy: Yes?

Tommy: Yes?

Tom Nook: Fix the roof!

Timmy: How?

Tommy: How?

Tom Nook: Quick, we can find some drywall or something at Menards in Department Town. Hurry!

Timmy: Yessir.

Tommy: Yessir.

They walk out of the store.

Ricky: Mmm.... URK ...help? An...y...bod...y...???

Ricky pushes with all his strength and manages to escape from the debris. He looks around in disgust, wiping off his arms. He tries to go out the front door, but the automatic shut squeezes his tail. He winces and shouts out, or tries to, but no noise comes out. He wiggles to get free but cannot. He pulls with all his strength and finally his tail rips off. He looks around more in fear than pain, and decides to leave his tail behind for now. He takes a few steps and an earthquake moves the ground. He falls in a crack – the deepest one – and looks up.

Ricky: Some people have all the luck. But it's not me, no sir. This game hates me!

Now, the earthquake undoes itself, so the ground comes closer together. Ricky gets squeezed. The ground is now normal, with the exception of Ricky embedded in it.

Ricky: mhmmhmmhmhmhmhmhmhmmhhhhmhmmhmhmhhmhmhmhhhhmhmm!!!

Tom Nook and Timmy and Tommy arrive with a piece of drywall. The go into their store and five seconds later Tom Nook comes out. He looks around for Ricky, but does not find him.

Tom Nook: Oh well, I guess we'll have to make Ricky's house without him. We've got the money so let's get started.

Tom Nook walks to the house.

Tom Nook: So Wendell, you've been on this show before, right?

Wendell: Yep, and I won!

Tom Nook: That's great! So how does it feel like to be a winner?

Wendell: Well, considering I did pretty well, pretty good!

Tom Nook: That's great! Now can you make us a wallpaper?

Wendell: Sure thing. What kind? Style? Fluent artistic motion?

Tom Nook: I was thinking something along the lines of... futuristic!

Wendell: OK sure!

Wendell whips out his equipment and starts to paint. His moves become faster and faster, until the brush flies out of his hands.

Wendell: Whallaa! I've never seen anything more beautiful in all my life!

Tom Nook: It's very... different. Futuristic? Maybe. But different? Definitely. And ugly? A sure thing.

Wendell: You mean you don't like it?

Tom Nook: Why don't you show the audience.

Wendell points it at the camera, the camera shatters.

WE ARE EXPERIENCING TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES. PLEASE WAIT WHILE WE SOLVE THIS PROBLEM TO THE BEST OF OUR ABILITIES. WHICH ISN'T SAYING MUCH BECAUSE OUR TECHNICIANS STINK. BUT PLEASE WAIT ANYWAY.

Tom Nook: OK, now we're back. Wendell, you broke the camera with your last painting, but now we duct taped it together and I think it's gotten used to our painting. So show it once again.

Wendell points it at the camera. The camera screams and falls over, dead. It will not work any more.

WE ARE EXPERIENCING TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES. PLEASE WAIT WHILE WE SOLVE THIS PROBLEM TO THE BEST OF OUR ABILITIES. WHICH ISN'T SAYING MUCH BECAUSE OUR TECHNICIANS STINK. BUT PLEASE WAIT ANYWAY.

Tom Nook: OK, we got a new camera and explained to it that this painting is really ugly. Now show it!

Wendell points it at the camera. It is hideous; the worst imaginable thing everywhere. Lines, marks, and ugly features cover the painting.

Wendell: Well? What does everybody think?

Tom Nook: Let me see... on the internet site we have a poll... (Gets out his laptop) so far we have 400 votes... they all passed out when they saw it.

Wendell: Then how are they voting?

Tom Nook: Um... never mind. Could you just make a new painting?

Wendell: No. My brush is stuck in that tree. And wasps are making a meal out of the paint.

The wasps all die. Wendell goes and gets the brush.

Wendell: Well, that works.

Tom Nook: Just don't let me touch your paint.

Wendell: OK... whatever.

Wendell draws something else, then shows it to Tom Nook. He frowns and shakes his head. This goes on for quite a while until Tom Nook gives up.

Tom Nook: What happened to your great artistic skills?

Wendell: (Breaks down into sobs) I have none! It's my brother Candell that makes all of them! I just pretend to make them so I can get free fish! BOOO HOOOOO!!!!

Tom Nook: Well, a great secret is revealed.

Wendell: Can we just use that ugly one?

Tom Nook: Um... I guess.

Wendell goes inside and puts on the wallpaper strips. Tom Nook turns to Sahara.

Tom Nook: Sahara, what are our possibilities?

Sahara: Well, let me see... I could make an elegant Arabian thing... but you said you wanted futuristic. Maybe a techno design? Something that makes you dizzy?

Tom Nook: That could be interesting. Try that.

Sahara: Let me see... weave this... weave this... through... here.... aha! Done.

Tom Nook: Whoah! It makes me so dizzy.. I think I'm gonna... faint...

THUNK! Tom Nook is unconscious.

Sahara: Well, I'll lie this out on the floor.

Wendell: Hey! Nooky! Tom!

Wendell gets some of his hot coffee form his pocket and pours it on Tom Nook.

Tom Nook: EEEEEYOOOOOOOWWWWWW!!!!

Wendell: Oops... sorry about that...

Tom Nook: OW! Ow! OW! Let's take a break! Fact break!

FACT BREAK

Did you know that in Iceland many Animal Crossing gamers get together for a convention and trade fish in their games? It's now become tradition.

END FACT BREAK

Tom Nook: And never do that again, Wendell! EVER!

Wendell: Yes, Mr. Nook.

Tom Nook: OK. Now, I need to get my furniture.

Tom Nook runs to his store and picks up the furniture. He runs back to the house and quickly arranges it.

Tom Nook: There! His house is finished! Whaddayaknow!

Wendell: It looks perfect.

Sahara: I agree.

Tom Nook: Actually, I wouldn't want to live in this mess, really.

Wendell: Well, yeah... it's artistic, but...

Sahara: It makes your eyes hurt.

Ricky comes over to the house. He is covered in dirt and mud.

Ricky: Lemme see it! Lemme see!

Ricky looks around the room.

Ricky: What? What is this? Is this a joke? I have to live here THE REST OF MY LIFE? NO! THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING!!! NOOOOOOOOoooooooooooo.............!!!!!

Tom Nook: Well, I guess that's our show.

Timmy: Wait daddy!

Tommy: Daddy! We have a rap song to sing!

Timmy: Sing it! One two three!

Tommy: Three!

Timmy and Tommy:

As we sing

to this song

why don't you

sing along

Once you learn

and get the beat

clap to the rhythm

move your feet!

Baa baa baa baa

Daa Dee Daa Daa

Baa baa baa baa

Daa Dee Daa Daa

Hop! Hop! Hop! Hop! to it!

Skip! Skip! Skip! Skip! to it!

One two three four

I declare a tail war

Five six seven eight

A new verse we must create

Now here's where it start's a'rappin'

Shout with your voice and start a'clappin'

Move your hands and shout aloud

Soon we'll be singin' in front of a crowd

Don't you love our rappin' beat

Now you'll be able to move your feet

Just skip and hop and jump real high

Reach in the air and touch the sky!

Baa baa baa baa

Daa Dee Daa Daa

Baa baa baa baa

Daa Dee Daa Daa

Hop! Hop! Hop! Hop! to it!

Skip! Skip! Skip! Skip! to it!

Tom Nook: Yes. Thank you – for that – interesting... song... sons.

Timmy: Thank you very much!

Tommy: Much thank you!

Timmy and Tommy run back to where they were. Tom Nook looks at the camera.

Tom Nook: Well, I guess that's it... finally. Oh yes, and let me remind you we are returning to our regular broadcast since major chaos has been happening ever since we changed it. Join us next time on Animal Crossing: Strange But True!