Author's Notes: Twitch I love my plushieEE..... and I like to give him snuggles... and nuzzles... and scritches..... .... Twitch...blank stare....and..huggles... Oh, huggles.... (Gotta love Fredyrk Phox!! Yippee!!)
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One Year Later
The first thing he realized was the obvious fact that no one else in his town had silver hair besides Sephiroth. And he knew that it wasn't going to just go away and move on, like many abnormal occurrences. It was just another one of those awkward moments when he realizes that an old friend has come by and you don't know what to say or how to act, since the relationship seems to go deeper and to darker places than your own.
But since he didn't see the man again after the second time while walking around the estate's gardens and many walkways, he didn't ask. In fact he felt all the more better, too, knowing that it was gone. His relationships with people were quite close. If the servants or maids had seen anything, they would most assuredly run crying to him or Mr. Rin and bawl about it.
Cloud's pace increased as he fell into step beside Sephiroth. They were going out together for the first time since they had spoken. Sephiroth himself seemed entirely comfortable with the limited space that they kept between each other. So close that Cloud could grab his leg if he wanted, or interrupt his stride with one outstretched foot. Instead they walked side by side, and Sephiroth's hand continuously made a movement as if to touch Cloud's but it carefully slipped back into his coat pocket again.
He shuffled into the building. The room was dim and filled with cigar-scent and warm food traces in the air swirled into motion as they passed tables. He glanced at Sephiroth, who was checking out everything as usual, his nose twitching at the smells and his eyes unable to keep from glowing incandescently in the shifting lamp light.
"Over there," Cloud said, but stopped short on account of a woman fast approaching them from the right. She had short cropped brown hair and eyes so dark they were like black holes, sucking up every detail on Sephiroth's face.
Cloud groaned.
"Hey, hey!" She latched herself onto Sephiroth's arm, dazzled eyes focused entirely on his handsome face. "What's on the menu today, boys? Can I get you anything?"
"Yeah. His personal space, maybe? Don't you know it's rude to just glue yourself to people like that?" Cloud folded his arms over his chest, jacket creasing around his shoulders and tightening over his back. He had slight scowl lines as he furrowed his thick blonde eyebrows.
She was short, shorter than Sephiroth and a little smaller than Cloud. She made no attempt to acknowledge Cloud's words as she leans against the silver-haired man, eyes gleaming. "Well, darling? Is there anything I can do for My Lord?"
All she ever did was hang off of his arm like that. Ever since she saw him eight months ago, it was all Cloud could do to keep himself from tearing her limb from limb and throwing her out to sea as fish bait.
"Maybe you could join us to sit down and eat," Sephiroth said quietly, perfectly natural and kind. One of those moments when Cloud honestly wished that he was evil and irritable and murderous again. And yet...
"Oh, I ...I couldn't!" She hadn't the guts to accept. Instead she lowered her eyes, those big black eyes, and backed away, tucking her hands behind her back and stretching her shoulders back as she bent her head modestly. "I don't think I could do that. You guys enjoy yourselves." And with that she actually looked at Cloud, not with hate resentment but with a small smirk and a wink before she turned, flouncing away.
Sephiroth shrugged. He didn't much care. He tolerated the squealing girl with the patience of an older figure. Cloud had to respect that, and shame bit him deep in the gut when he had treated her so poorly. He opened his mouth to apologize for himself, but then he felt the even pressure of his hand in his, and his tender pull as they slipped in at a booth sheltered by soft light.
Seph leaned back. The booth was able to hold them both.. but Sephiroth had, of course, a tallness that cursed him from sitting in small spaces like this. So he sat sideways, stretching his legs out into the room, one arm stretched across the table, and still gripping Cloud's fingers.
The blonde man could barely take his eyes off of their hands. It seemed so unnatural. But it felt good. He watched Sephiroth watch him when he stroked his knuckles with his thumb. This felt better. Yes, maybe a little.
"What do you want?" Sephiroth murmured, his eyes closing slowly. He looked sad and somehow pleased.
He found his mouth curving lightly into a similar smile. "I dunno, uh... just coffee and maybe a croissant. Do they have croissants? Or maybe some spaghetti. Uh--"
"Are you happy?"
"Wha?"
Sephiroth sighed, resting his forehead in the opposite hand, speaking with great effort. "Do you mind it if we go out together like we have?"
"I wouldn't if you told me not to. I'm doing this for you, mostly. And I don't mind at all... you don't have to ask me."
The men looked at each other for a prolonged period of time, both a little frightened. Then without any inhibitions, Cloud leaned over the table, straining to reach his cheek, which he kissed, caressing with his smooth, cool lips. He hovered over their joined hands for a second, thinking about what he had just done.
"I'm not really hungry," he continued, "if you really want to know the truth."
The silver-haired man smiled. It was rather dark, perfectly amused for reasons he didn't yet comprehend. An interminable amount of time passed again, in which Cloud sat back and stretched out his legs into the free space under the table. He looked away, blushing, and once tried to disengage their hands. Finally Sephiroth let go and stood, stretching, his long hair tumbling back into its natural position.
"Fine. I want to go home. I command you to come with me." Sephiroth turned to him, lines of cruelty lightly playing on his forehead. His eyes were amused.
"Yes, Lord," Cloud mumbled, playing along naturally, reaching out to loop his arm with his. They emerged into the sunlight, blinking together like two newborn colts. They proceeded leisurely along the docks, before slipping into their section of the neighborhood, where everything was covered in flowers and sweet-smelling plants. The aroma was pretty heady... Cloud thought the sun was making him feel this bizarre giddiness.
The sun makes it easier to see his face, his mind whispered. And the sun makes his tanned skin gleam, so nicely... I wonder if it's soft. Soft as his mouth, his hands...
Cloud swallowed. It was hard to really think anything coherent. But the same repetitious thoughts ran in his head, looping around in red-tinged circles. Suddenly he started remembering how good it felt to be Sephiroth's friend. He realized that it wasn't so bad that he had been his slave for that short period of time.
His heart was pounding again. It was hammering like a native message drum, non-stop. He locked his eyes on the stone pathway in front of his face. It occurred to him that maybe there was something magical touching his brain and making him lose his carefully maintained reason.
"You're doing it, aren't you?" Cloud broke out suddenly. "My head's swimming and I want to look at you a little more. What the crap, man?"
Sephiroth stopped hard, his boot clicking fiercely on the stone. He slipped his arm loose and turned around 60 degrees, looking sideways at Cloud. He didn't seem to have an answer that was easy. He shrugged his shoulders. "It must be you, because I'm not trying to do anything. You're the awkward, off-kilter clone who wanted to kill me but really wanted to know where I got that Masamune."
"That's right. You don't have to try to have someone fall for you!" Cloud grinned, helpless. He burst into a brief, but loud fit of laughter simply because the statement seemed so out-of-character it was hysterically funny. "But... seriously. I know we are supposed to be... ah, going out. But don't we act more like best friends than lovers?"
The eyes of Mako green burned a little. Something in them softened with something like... pleasure. "Would you prefer we do something... more personal, then? Maybe that would ease your mind. You seem anxious."
The air between them seemed much smaller. And it was electric, something like synaptic firing going on that he, Cloud, had not been aware of before. He saw Sephiroth come closer, doing nothing to stop him except maybe close his eyes, and draw up short with unease and confusion. His cheeks warmed so much he thought he'd start getting short of breath.
"I don't know what to do," Cloud said. "Command me to do something. But as a tip, I want to go back to the estate now and get some shut-eye because you... you make me sleepy."
"Oh, thank you very much."
"No. I mean you make me... relaxed. Y-You make me... happy, I think, and I really like that feeling... though it... never... occurred to me I'd be feeling it for a long time coming." Cloud lowered his eyes, tucking his chin to his chest as his shoulders began to hunch. Unfortunately, this put his forehead against Sephiroth's chest. The contact coaxed the older man's arms to rise, close around Cloud's body which very soon started to feel the effects of their proximity.
It never felt so good to have him this close. He dropped his shoulders slowly and let himself slowly draw him in closer, the embrace perfectly calm... and to Cloud it felt like they matched almost perfectly. His eyes watered. Suddenly he realized that never during his first relationship with this man did he hug him or approach him with the intention to touch him affectionately... not unless they were safely alone and out of discovery's way, which wasn't very often. But even then when Sephiroth had any spare moments, he rigorously studied his magic and his swordsmanship with a dedication that made Cloud sometimes burn with jealousy.
There were many 'whys' and 'how comes' waiting to be spoken right now, but he held them tight behind his teeth, and swallowed hard. He pressed his cheek into his chest, his eyes watering and narrowing as his lips tightened to prevent the unexpected bout of emotion rattling through him.
I never thought I would be in love at all. Never even imagined that someone like Sephiroth would suddenly pop back into my life like a pilot out of the Bermuda Triangle...
He was so ready to forget. Preparing for years to move on with his life wasn't an easy task. Leaving almost everyone behind, the way Tifa and Aeris looked at him as he insisted moving in and working for Mr. Rin was better. But at least they lived in the same world and they could visit, but when was the last time they ever wrote?
And he wasn't ready for this.
"Se-Seph? I--" He picked his head up, only to find his sentence cut off by his thumb pressing against his lips, his hand sliding against his cheek and holding his head still. He was shocked, shushed, and paralyzed all at once, for Sephiroth was not smiling anymore and his eyes were not looking at him.
Cloud turned his head around, pulling his face free to look. But he only caught a speck of movement which vanished over the tops of the fences and into the flowery green humidity beyond. He frowned, wiping his eyes and narrowing them to get a fix on it. Before he could ask, Sephiroth already had his hand and led him away, making a shortcut to the estate.
Sephiroth made no attempt to hide the anger that burned steadily and at an even level all night. When he found himself staring into the mirror at his reflection, beyond which stood the quietly nonplussed Ansem, he turned his rage on him.
"What do you think you're doing? You're playing with him, aren't you? How can you play with his emotions like that?"
"I'm not tilting the scales one way or the other, if that's what you're thinking. I give him ideas only. What he thinks of them is his own business. Why are you yelling at me? I thought I told you to trust me." His golden eyes glued to the angry man's distraught form. His own body language illustrated his own confusion. Why was Sephiroth so angry with him?
"I don't know if I can do this. The way he always looks at me... it's as though he's looking at a cross-word puzzle and he can't figure out the very last final word to complete it... and it's driving him batty. I don't want him to suffer. What if I ...what if I can't do this?"
" 'Can't'? There is no 'can't'. You will, Sephiroth, you have to. Please... you can't give up like this on me." Ansem walked forward, halted only by his weakened magic. He stopped, gazing as his hands became transparent. "I can't do this much longer either... I must bind myself to him. I must make myself part of him... while he loves you."
Sephiroth halted. He turned his head, his hair flying out behind him in a shining arc as he tried to focus on Ansem. But he was gone already, his spirit fled from this plane to lightly traverse the next.
While Sephiroth sat down, trying to divulge what he had heard, Ansem walked the dim distorted green hallways of the Spirit Realm, the incorporeal body passing through the wood and things as though he weren't there. He saw living creatures as soft red lights, gleaming and flickering as they hid in their places beyond human sight. To be noted, this was the same way that Hikaru could travel through the hallways of the world where dragons were common commodities.
He fell upon the lethargic movements of one, Cloud Strife. It was early, the sun barely kissing the edge of the sea from out the window. But he was already turning down the sheets to sleep and something in his movements made Ansem pause and think. He saw his body drop face-down into the blankets like a sandbag, and although his senses didn't reach into the material realm, he saw from his shaking body that he must be mildly upset.
Ansem cursed himself. He had limited power left to do something about his suffering. Watching him, he had discovered that Cloud was not as hard-of-heart as everyone thought. Surely, Cloud was a formidable warrior and an honorable man. But it was neither easy nor comfortable to admit to his own feelings. Something that Ansem would have to work around.
He drifted to the bedside. As usual, Cloud sensed the change and turned his head to look around. His eyes burned brighter than the rest of his body, a dark deep crimson that was similar to blood. Ansem smiled.
He reached out, as though he really intended to touch the soft hair that collapsed like falling leaves of gold over his face. Of course, to him, these leaves of gold were now red like the rest of him was. But instead of passing through him as he would have, he momentarily saw the color spill through, saw the golden hair. He moved his fingers lightly over his cheek. Cloud gasped lightly, his chest heaving as he rolled onto his back and reached to find the hand that touched him from out of nowhere.
"I love you," Ansem whispered. "I love everything in you... and someday soon, you will let me into your soul and let me see my love again with real eyes, and touch him with real hands and kiss him with a real mouth. Through you... you can help me. You will reunite my lover and I... won't you?"
Cloud blinked. Shook his head. He trembled a little, rubbing his hands over his face, gritting his teeth against a subtle chill that spilled over from the realm of the dead.
Ansem waited very patiently indeed. As long as he held very still, and lay his spiritual body very close to the drowsing man's, he could almost feel his breathing, and his very loud heartbeat was easier to hear than it ever was, this close. If all went well, soon... he wouldn't need to listen at all. He'd be inside, in touch with every organ system and sensory in-put in his body.
