Part Seventeen

Twenty Minutes Later…

May 9, 2004

"I'm fine, Piper," Phoebe complained while her sister crouched in the open door of the shower and washed her feet. "Now get up, you shouldn't be down there. Besides," she added when Piper ignored her and continued lathering her legs, "you're getting yourself and the floor all wet…Piper, please, I'm a big girl and can shower myself."

"Big is right," Piper teased with a quick rub to Phoebe's belly. Shielding her eyes from the water spray, she grinned, "How many toes can you see?"

"What?" Phoebe sputtered when water suddenly rained into her eyes. She wiped them with her wet palms, grateful it had only been water and not shampoo. "Ten," she sighed and looked down at her sister through squinted eyes. She tried to nudge Piper with her foot but nearly slipped and she muttered, "And I'd appreciate your letting me take care of them."

"Ten you can see?" Piper rinsed away the suds, "Can't fool me, Pheebs, I know you haven't seen your toes for at least two months." She glanced up in time to see Phoebe's eyes roll back, "Don't give me that look, missy. I'm under strict instructions not to let you shower alone and I don't intend on bearing the brunt of his displeasure when he discov--"

Phoebe balled her hands into fists, "That overprotective, overbearing, demon! Who the hell does he thi--"

Piper scowled at her baby sister, "He thinks the last thing he wants to hear is that his beloved wife slipped in the shower because she dropped the soap and couldn't easily pick it up. And furthermore you could show a little more gratit--"

"All right," Phoebe interrupted, "point taken. Experience and thoughtfulness rule. I humbly apologize to you and that husband of mine. But can I get out or are you trying to turn me into a prune?"

"Well," Piper considered while Phoebe turned off the water anyway, "maybe this time of celibacy will help you un--"

"I said 'prune' not 'prude'!" Phoebe exclaimed as she wrung out a washcloth over Piper's head. Her sister shrieked and she laughed, momentarily forgetting the nagging feeling in the pit of her stomach that she'd had all day. But the stall suddenly spun around her and she blindly stretched out her hands and tried to grab anything solid.

Piper caught her sister's hands and immediately stood to support Phoebe even though her action nearly caused her to lose her own balance. Chris seemed to kick her in protest but she ignored him and kept her arms locked around Phoebe. "You're dizzy from all the steam," she realized as she watched the blood drain from her sister's face. "Stand still and breathe in and out." Phoebe tried to push her away but Piper held firm and insisted, "Just breathe in and out. I don't care how wet I get." As soon as she felt Phoebe was steady, she reached with one hand for the nearby bath towel and helped wrap it around Phoebe. She slowly led Phoebe to the toilet and, before she opened the door to let in some cool air, she instructed, "Sit, close your eyes, and breathe."

After a few moments, color returned to Phoebe's face and Piper exhaled in relief. She brought over another towel and handed it to Phoebe. While Phoebe quietly dried her hair, Piper knelt and worked with a third towel on drying Phoebe's legs. "Back to bed after this," she warned Phoebe. "Dinner won't be for another couple of hours so you'll snack and then nap."

Phoebe threw her towel on the floor and snapped, "Enough! I'll eat and sleep when I want." But, almost immediately after her outburst, she apologized.

"No, I'm sorry," Piper contritely said. "I, we, just want to make sure you're as comfortable as possible. We're all worried about you and the baby and we may go a little overboard at times."

Phoebe sniffled, "Sometimes it's like I'm being smothered and I get all…"

"Phoebe," Piper uttered in concern when Phoebe suddenly began crying, "what's wrong?" Her hand instinctively covered Phoebe's belly, "Is it the baby?" But when Phoebe didn't answer and leaned into her, Piper awkwardly wrapped her arms around her sister and encouraged, "You know you can tell me anything…"

Phoebe hugged her sister tighter and forced herself to get the words out. "I think I've gone crazy," she whispered, "insane crazy." Piper rubbed her back and said all the right things but Phoebe still couldn't let go of the awful feeling she felt squeezing her heart. "I'm not sure this is real," she nervously stated.

Piper pulled back and smiled, "Oh, Pheebs, I know. I've been there, remember? It's pretty surreal having a life growing inside of you that, in just a few weeks, will --"

"No!" Phoebe interrupted. Piper seemed more confused than annoyed by her outburst and she grabbed hold of Piper's hand and squeezed it. "I'm not sure this life is real," she tried to explain. "What if this is all a dream or some warped premonition or even a time loop? How many times can I live through these two years?"

Back to the premonition again. Torn between calling for Cole or Paige or Leo, Piper simply knelt before Phoebe and caressed her sister's hand that still held her own. "Sweetie, if it was a time loop, you'd be living the same events over and wouldn't even realize you were stuck. And you no longer have your power of premonition, remember?" Phoebe didn't look relieved so she smiled again, "This is real, believe it."

"What if you're wrong," Phoebe whispered. "What if Cole was wrong? What if these two years are the premonition? A warning about who's behind the plot against Wyatt." Piper was about to interrupt so she quickly continued, "What if I've still got my power of premonition? What if it's as much a part of me today as the day I was born?"

"The Wasteland," Piper gently reminded her.

Phoebe shrugged helplessly, "The power of visions I got from the Wasteland weren't an exact substitution for my premonitions but I still saw the future. So maybe that ability is meant to be a part of me. Wiccan or demonic, what if Phoebe Halliwell is supposed to be some sort of seer no matter what fate throws her way?" Piper seemed to consider her words and she continued, "Now what if the Tribunal ruling simply made my all powers dormant? They said I'd have to earn my powers back so what if it's like before we knew we even had powers and said that very first spell to unbind them. We had no clue what we were doing but the powers kept coming, evolving. But they weren't really new ones, were they? They were simply a part of us we were only first discovering."

"This's anxiety talking," Piper quietly decided as she picked up Phoebe's discarded towel and gently dried her sister's hair. "The premature labor and loss of your powers've finally taken a toll on you. But it'll be okay, Pheebs, the baby will be born in a few weeks when she's supposed to be and we'll find out who's after Wyatt. So please stop worrying about your vanquish and your powers. Let it go."

"But what if I wasn't vanquished!" Phoebe pushed herself away from her sister and nearly stumbled over to the sink. She pressed her palms to the cool vanity and leaned against it. Her towel loosened but she didn't have the strength to tighten it as she tried to stop the assault of terrible thoughts of Cole's fate from swirling in her mind. What if she'd been right when she'd told Cole they were never meant to be? What if reality was finally intruding on this figment of her own imagination? What if Chris's admission that Cole disappeared was simply her own mind covering for the fact that Cole no longer truly existed in reality and therefore had no true place within this dream of a false reality?

"Phoebe?"

She closed her eyes and, in a shaky voice, asked Piper, "What if true reality means that I'd never killed the Seer that night two years ago? What if, instead, I'd helped vanquish Cole? What if we vanquished the Seer the following week after she stole the baby from within me in order to become the next Source? What if Cole was sent to the Wasteland alone and came back invincible?" She opened her eyes and slowly turned to face her older sister, "What if true reality means that I rejected him and a life with him? What if each rejection twisted him to the point of losing his sanity?" Piper seemed horrified but Phoebe couldn't move and hugged herself as she continued voicing her deepest fears, "What if true reality means that he caused his own vanquish through his obsession with me? What if I buried it all as nothing but a sad, unfortunate, chapter of my life and moved on? What if I fell in love again with someone new and wonderful but got burned because he couldn't handle my being a witch?"

"I can't believe I'm saying this but I can't see you with anyone but Cole. None of it's real, Phoebe. None of it happened," Piper quietly told her.

"What if it did?" Phoebe nearly cried. "What if reality means that to some degree all of this happened? What if Leo still became an Elder and left you and Wyatt? What if we learned that Wyatt's got this magical destiny but forces of evil still come after him nearly every week? What if Chris came back from a horrible future to save his older brother from a terrible fate? What if Paige is still struggling to find her place and you're still trying to single-handedly raise one-and-a-half children? What if I obsess over finding the father of my child to the point of still abusing my powers that they're taken from me?" Piper said nothing so she took a deep breath and added in a surprisingly calmer tone, "The point of the Tribunal was to seek justice but what if justice means giving up control and letting fate guide my life, our lives? A long time ago, Cole told me that sometimes a premonition is only to show me something that is meant to happen. The one major constant between the two sets of years I've lived is the danger to Wyatt. So what if this is nothing more than my subconscious's attempt to show me who's responsible for going after Wyatt?"

"You've thought a lot about this," Piper quietly acknowledged as she finally dropped the towel and tried to process the information. She slowly got to her feet and rubbed her belly, "What if we do learn who's responsible? Do you think you'll just wake up again in that "real" world Cole thought was only a premonition and realize that the past two years were nothing more than a dream to you?"

Phoebe slowly nodded and burst into tears again, "But I don't want it back to the way it was, not after living this life of 'what if'! I'm happy here!" She reached for Piper who quickly embraced her. "I don't have to deny myself my love for Cole and I can believe in his love. I can't lose this life!" She quickly pulled back, "Don't you see, Piper? I'm safe here. I've got the family I've always wanted and there's no conflict. I can love you and I can love Cole and I don't have to pretend I'm okay when I'm not and I don't have to come up with excuses. I don't have to…I don't have to feel guilty anymore. I'm free!"

"Oh, sweetie," Piper murmured while she held her sister in her arms, "you had a terrible nightmare this afternoon and you're scared. Your imagination's running wild from all the time you've been forced to spend in bed with nothing to do but there's nothing to be afraid of. Justice isn't going to swoop down and take any of this away from you. Not Wyatt and certainly not Cole. And I've got every faith that your powers will return just like you were told."

"You don't believe me," Phoebe realized. A twinge in her side caused her to involuntarily grunt and she massaged the spot, ignoring Piper's concern for her. "You think I'm over-reacting…I told you I was crazy."

Piper tried to apologize when tears again fell from her sister's eyes, "You're worried about everyone and being brave for everyone and we love you for it but you're not alone, Phoebe, and you don't have to be scared. It's our turn to take care of you and I promise we're not going to disappear on you." She reached out and massaged the area Phoebe kept rubbing, "Please, Pheebs, this isn't good for you or for your baby."

"I'm not in labor," Phoebe finally said.

Piper nodded, "But your daughter is sending you a message that you need to relax." She wrapped her arm around Phoebe's shoulders and slowly walked Phoebe out of the bathroom, "Come on, let's get you changed into that new mini-dress I bought you and get you something rich and gooey to eat and I'll style your hair just like when we were little and I'll do my best to convince you that this is reality. And if that's still not good enough, I'll call the big bad demon himself and have him come back here and convince you himself."

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Shadows danced along the cavern's walls due to the flames from the evenly spaced torches. Gideon knelt before the pile of clothing and stared at it before he sighed, "If only you had given me the chance to show you the truth. As it is, you merely delayed the inevitable. After I inform them of what transpired here, they will have no reason to believe Wyatt remains in any danger and I will soon again find myself with the opportunity to ensure that he never fulfills his destiny."

Gideon slowly stood and wiped his dusty palms on his thighs. "What a pity," he spoke again to the pile, "that your wife will never know of your true sacrifice. But you see, Cole Turner, some sacrifices are necessary when fighting for the greater good."

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