Epilogue
One Week Later
May 17, 2004
Phoebe shot up in bed with a start. Her heart pounding, she covered it with her hand in the hopes of slowing it. As she took deep breaths, images of the demonic attack flashed before her eyes. Alone in P3's parking lot the night before, helpless without her powers, she hadn't gotten away unscathed. Hell, she'd barely been thinking straight in order to come up with a vanquish. 'Did I really go to the mausoleum?' she groaned. Unfortunately, the trip home was a blur. 'Did I talk to anyone before I crawled into bed?'
Her heart was still beating quickly as the dream replayed itself in her mind in fast-forward motion. It had been so vivid, so real. She couldn't stop from shaking as she scanned her room. Normal. She stumbled to her vanity's chair and stared at her reflection in the mirror. She looked like hell. 'Haven't I been there for the past few weeks?' she bitterly thought. 'But everything's okay now.' She glanced at the pile of letters she'd been working on last night before she'd left for the club. 'Everything's as it should be,' she sighed in relief.
She nearly jumped from her seat when she heard the knock on her bedroom door.
"Phoebe?" Piper hesitantly called out. "You okay?"
"I'm fine, Piper," Phoebe announced. Knowing she was about to be lectured, she sighed and added, "Come on in."
"I thought I heard you call out and -- you look like hell," Piper frowned as she rubbed her belly and approached her sister.
"Aren't you're supposed to be full of compliments for me, all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, this morning?" Phoebe sarcastically quipped. "Or did my gift of giving you an early night of privacy go wasted?"
"No, it did not," Piper stated. "In fact, last night was much appreciated."
"You're welcome," Phoebe smirked as she tried to slip past Piper and get to the bathroom.
"Freeze, missy," Piper ordered.
"Sorry," Phoebe decided, "but I've got only a few minutes before Paige hogs the last of the hot water."
"I've got a power and I'm not afraid to use it," Piper warned as her sister took another step towards the door.
"Piiiper..." Phoebe whined. "I need a shower."
"Hey," Paige interrupted when she entered the bedroom, her eyes half-closed, "what's going on in here?"
Phoebe pointed to her older sister and tattled, "Piper threatened to freeze me."
"Why," Paige asked with a yawn, "what'd you do?"
Phoebe placed both hands on her hips and retorted, "What makes you think I did anything?"
"'Cuz Piper wouldn't freeze you 'less she had good reason," Paige yawned again.
"You shouldn't've closed the club," Piper scolded. "You should've been resting and not overdoing it."
"What time'd you get in anyway?" Paige asked as she stretched her arms over her head. "You weren't in bed when I got here."
"You checked on me?" Phoebe exclaimed.
"Where'd you go?" Piper wondered. But when Phoebe's nightshirt shifted and Piper caught sight of a large bruise on her sister's collarbone, her curiosity became mingled with concern. "Honey, that wasn't there yesterday. What happened last night?"
"You know I hurt it in the demon attack," Phoebe reminded her.
"It wasn't that bad," Piper argued.
"You certainly seemed to think so yesterday," Phoebe muttered, "the way you were fussing over me."
Piper ignored her comment and asked again, "What happened last night when you were at the club?"
Paige's eyes suddenly widened and she stared at her older sister, "Pheebs, did someone hurt you?"
Phoebe immediately shook her head but winced in pain from the action. "I'm fine," she quietly stated. "It was just a vanquish. No big deal."
"Another one?" Piper worried as she led her sister back to the bed and sat Phoebe down.
Paige tried to stay calm but her sister's attitude was still as frustrating as when Phoebe'd first been stripped of her powers. "How can you say it's not a big deal? Have you looked in the mirror lately? You know you're in no condition to be fighting demons, especially alone. You should've called for help."
Phoebe shrugged and instantly realized her re-injured shoulder would be a problem for days to come. Maybe she should call Leo and have him heal it. Instead, she answered Piper, "I closed up, waited 'til everyone left, and went to my car. Demon attacked, I dodged its fire, said a spell, and, poof, no more demon."
Paige frowned, "I don't like this. Too many attacks in a short amount of time. Did you look it up in the Book?"
Phoebe apologetically shook her head, "Crawled straight into bed."
"It's okay," Piper acknowledged, "you'll look it up in a little while."
"I have a pile of work," Phoebe stated.
"It'll keep," Piper glared. "You know you're all up-to-date and've only been working on filler columns."
Paige couldn't stop herself from slapping Phoebe's good arm, "Why didn't you tell us or call for help?"
"I don't know," Phoebe lied. But she saw her sisters' disbelief and confessed, "Fine, I did know." They were clearly waiting for her to continue so she sighed, "I didn't want to hear you, or anyone else, say 'I told you so.'" Both sisters expressed confusion and she threw her hands up in exasperation, "Because all of you were right. I need my powers but I don't have them. And it hurts. It hurts to be missing a part of myself. It hurt to feel so helpless. And I was embarrassed. And...I was angry...I was so angry..."
Both sisters immediately sat next to her and hugged her but it was still a moment before Phoebe felt secure enough to let the tears fall. And her sisters murmured words of comfort while she cried softly in their loving arms.
Paige pulled back first, "I'm sorry, sweetie. I never should've gone on and on about how angry you should be. I had no right to impose my feelings on you. Instead of listening to you, I tried to convince you that you were behaving wrong."
Piper nodded to Paige but pressed her hands to Phoebe's cheeks, "We were wrong, Phoebe. You were the one who lost your powers and we should've trusted your judgment in dealing with it."
Phoebe covered Piper's hands with her own and sniffled, "But don't you see, you were right not to trust me because I was lying to myself. I told you how wrong I'd been in denying my feelings about Cole when he was...evil...but even as the words were coming out of my mouth I was doing the same exact thing concerning the ruling."
Piper lowered her hands and gazed at her sister, the one she knew so well. "You went to the mausoleum," she realized.
Phoebe stared down at the sheets and nodded shamefully, "I just ran. I couldn't deal with anyone. I just needed..."
"To feel safe," Piper nodded with understanding before she hugged Phoebe tightly. "Oh, sweetie, it's okay..."
Paige rubbed Phoebe's back and admitted, "How was it? Being back there, I mean. It's been a couple of years but it must've brought back some bad memories."
Phoebe sniffled and pushed herself out of Piper's embrace. "I wasn't really thinking about any of that," she admitted. "I was just so angry, so filled with pain and rage." She blinked back the memory and added, "I was so dizzy, I think I must've fainted. And then I had this dream...this incredible dream..."
Piper exchanged a confused glance with Paige, "A dream?"
Phoebe took a moment before she touched her lips, "It was so strange...It's like I got a chance to see what my life might've been like if things'd happened a little differently. I guess it was hard at first, I had a lot of bad stuff to work through but I think I made a good life for myself. I was happy...so happy. I found peace..." She smiled softly but her sisters still seemed so concerned so she quickly assured them, "I'm fine, really. Actually, I think I'm better than fine. In spite of everything, I still needed to come to terms with some issues in my life, like the Source and the Seer and this Tribunal ruling, and this dream helped me. And now it's like I finally feel free, free from the --"
Paige quickly caught her sister when Phoebe suddenly sagged in her direction. "Leo!"
Slightly dizzy, Phoebe insisted she was fine even as the room spun about her. "I'm fine," she repeated, although it was more to convince herself of that fact that her sisters.
"You're not fine," Piper angrily stated, having had enough of her sister's denial. "You've been attacked twice in the same day, not to mention the hell you've been through these past few weeks and the last thing any of us want is for you to end up in the hospital for exhaustion from wearing yourself down with exposing yourself to needless danger."
"I didn't ask to be target practice," Phoebe snapped while she tried to shove Piper away.
But Piper resisted and managed to push Phoebe right back against the pillows, "Take a nap. The rest of us deal with demons and breakfast and not necessarily in that order."
"Stay," Paige demanded of her older sister as she followed Piper out of the room. But she couldn't resist the pun and commanded, "Heal."
Phoebe used her good arm and tossed a pillow at her sister who simply orbed out of the way. "Personal gain!" she called out before falling back into her pillows with a sigh. Closing her eyes, she murmured, "Cole..." She sighed again and, almost immediately, drifted off to a dreamless sleep.
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Phoebe smelled muffins. Fresh-baked muffins. She sniffed and opened her eyes. Groaning as she shifted in bed, she discovered Piper standing in the doorway with a basket of muffins and a pitcher of milk. "Chocolate chip?" Phoebe eagerly questioned. Her sister nodded and she sat up straighter, "Yummy!"
Paige followed Piper into the room, carrying a few napkins and plastic cups. "You seem better now, sleep well?"
"I guess," Phoebe shrugged, winced, and promised herself not to do that again. "I guess I realized," she admitted while glancing from one sister to another, "that I'm just happy to be here...home. It never mattered if I was in New York or Hong Kong or even in a penthouse across town, this has always been home for me."
"And it always will be," Piper promised with a smile. "Even when you're an old married lady surrounded by a gazillion great-grandkids, this will always be home."
Paige saw her sister's grateful smile but was still concerned. What if Phoebe was still punishing herself for what happened with the Tribunal by burying it inside? Was it really possible that Phoebe could've dealt with it all in a dream? "Sure you're okay, Phoebe? Justice hasn't exactly been kind to you lately."
Phoebe nodded while she accepted a cup of milk from Piper. She took a sip and declared, "I'm through living in the past. The Seer and the Source, they're part of a chapter in my life that's over and done with. And I won't let them hurt me anymore."
Relieved, Paige clinked her own cup of milk to Phoebe's and said, "Amen to that."
"And I won't be driven by the future either," Phoebe continued. "I won't live my life forcing bits and pieces to come true."
"Take each day as it comes," Piper advised as she took Phoebe's cup and set it on the nightstand next to the pitcher and basket.
"Exactly," Phoebe agreed, leaning back against her pillow. Releasing her emotions had been a more draining experience than she realized and she couldn't believe how tired she was. But at least it was a good kind of tired. "I won't live in fear that my past will catch up to me or that I won't have a future I deserve. My life will be what I make of it, the choices I make."
Piper straightened Phoebe's nightshirt, mindful of the bruise, "Then, right now, you've got only one major choice to make."
"What's that?" Paige wondered before she sipped from her cup of milk.
Piper grinned, "Will you have one muffin or two?"
The three sisters glanced at each other, smiled knowingly, and declared, "Three!"
The End
so it seems the tribunal has forced phoebe to take a hard look at her life and, in spite of the trauma, she has finally made peace with her past and has a new outlook for the future...now, what do you think...
was phoebe's life with cole truly a dream; a complex subconscious attempt to create order in her life?
or
did phoebe truly have a life with cole; the past two years, as we know them, nothing more than a premonition?
i'll leave it for you to decide...
unless, of course, you'd still like to see a possible resolution i had to the matter...
in that case, dear reader, your bonus epilogue awaits...
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