Blinded By The Past, Ignored In The Future

Chapter 19

NINTEEN: The Prisoner of Life

Response To Reviews:

Emily-Dufleng: You lie! It's horrible, isn't it???? Well I'm going to shut-up now…And yeah Tom brought this all upon himself…In a way.

deathsoul-shinigami: I have a really bad migraine. And just so you know. I like Draco! He can be cool when he's not jealous of Potter. How I would know that? Don't ask…A little secret about me. I'm a perfectionist like Hermione. I'm a Slytherin perfectionist actually. If something is anything lower than perfect I have to fix it! And when I wrote that author's note I was angry at my Algebra. It was too hard for my liking! And I'm gona cut this shot because it's hard to type with Angina (my baby pet snake) on my hand. She said, Hisssssssssss." Oh yeah and I'm not at all mad at you for being a bit mean to get your point across.   

Emma Ackroyd: Hello again. I want to you to get a good damn computer and install MSN so we can chat! I'm bored during the week and weekends. Prongs feels dumb for asking about your brother. He sounds like me when I was younger: a bragging no good smarty-pants. Yeah…only I'm still like that lol. But then again I studied so I wouldn't have to deal with life.

Marauder1prongs: I know enough about life, Katie. I learned from the books I read. Like The Thief Lord. Ttys.     

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Previous Chapter: "Then it's a good thing we've made other arrangements." Tom raised an eyebrow again and turned to them. "You will be staying with Remus Lupin here with frequent visits from me."

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Tom looked at them in horror. He didn't want to break his silent streak anymore than he had to but decided that this was an exception. "Why? How long? I'm not going to be one of your Order members servants!" The whole thing came out in what sounded like a single but long sentence.

Remus smiled at him in amusement as Dumbledore explained, "You obviously can't return to Hogwarts and Remus dubbed our hideout too boring." Tom glared at the werewolf. He could have been left alone at the Order's meetinghouse and found a way to escape if it weren't for him.

"Your belongings have already been move to your temporary home and Remus will explain the rules he has set up for you that you will be expected to follow." Dumbledore pulled out his serpent knife. "You will get this back when Remus thinks you can handle having it." With that said Dumbledor3e handed the knife to his friend and Madam Yean came in.

"I suppose you two are here to collect him?" she asked Dumbledore and Remus. Remus half smiled and Dumbledore nodded. "Then if you would be kind enough to sign these release papers well since you know he has no legal guardian." Tom could tell that she had lowered her voice so he couldn't hear what she had said but he had understood it perfectly. So what if he didn't belong to anybody? He never needed adult guidance before and he never would.

For the good of his mood he pretended that he didn't hear what the nurse said and he lay down again as Dumbledore and Remus handled the papers. Ten minutes later Dumbledore called his name, telling him it was time to leave.

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Before Tom was ready, he found himself standing in front of a black painted door with a silver serpent doorknocker. The Order was waiting inside for their arrival and soon enough they were all gong to sit down for dinner then Dumbledore would have to return to Hogwarts while Tom would be stranded at the werewolf's until he had fully 'recovered'.

Remus held the door open for them and Dumbledore led him to the main room. He found that not too many of the Order members were there: Mr. And Mrs. Weasley, Tonks (if he remembered her name correctly) and a few others.

"Come sit down, dear," Mrs. Weasley said rushing over to him. With her hands on his shoulder she directed him to a seat to the left of her own. When the table was set (Remus had offered after Tonks had almost knocked everything over) and the food was ready (Mrs. Weasley refused to let anyone help her) they all began to eat.

Tom sat there, not really wanting anything. He had no desire to eat. And he certainly didn't have a desire to sit and listen to Dumbledore talk with a bunch of Gryffindors. He looked up at some point and saw Snape standing in the doorway, clutching his left forearm. For perhaps a split second Snape's eyes met his own and he saw exactly what he felt: the feeling of not belonging where you stand. Snape looked at the ground in what he masked as disdain.

"What's wrong, Tom?" Dumbledore's voice cut through his thoughts.

He looked at the old Headmaster with a blank expression and then to his plate. What was he supposed to say? That Snape was standing in the doorway, wishing he could force himself to come in? He shook his head and Dumbledore, though not believing his cover up, turned back to his conversation with Mr. Weasley.

All too soon dinner was over and Tom had only picked at his food. Dumbledore led them to a fire then bid and farewell as Remus handed him some floo powder in. "Say The Old Lupin Cottage." Remus told him. Riddle didn't bother to snap at the command or question him of where he actually lived.

"The Old Lupin Cottage!" he shouted, throwing in the powder.

Emerald flames engulfed him and he felt himself spinning as he watched different exits go by. Then he was thrown through one and he felt himself hit a wooden floor. He coughed and got to his feet, brushing himself off.

Tom wondered around the half room and saw a couch that he didn't dare try and guess how old it was. A rather large bookcase rested in the corner. He scanned the titles and saw that they all had something to do with Defence Against the Dark Arts or different advance curses. He traced over the side of one and once he inspected his finger he saw that it was covered in thick dust, telling him that the books hadn't been touché in years.

Behind him he heard Remus come out of the fireplace. "Those books were my father's. I haven't read them in years." Tom picked a brown, leather scrapbook off of the shelf and showed it to Remus.

"What is this?"

Remus snatched it from him rater quickly then inspected it, making sure that no damage was done to it. "I wasn't going to do anything to it," Tom said.  

He gave Tom an apologizing look before explaining, "It's my picture book from when I was at Hogwarts and I before-well before different things came up." He sat down on the nearby couch and Tom took a seat next to him. "You really wanna know?"

Tom snorted. "What's the point of living with a total stranger?"

Remus laughed in amusement and nervousness. "Well this is going to be a long story."

"I'm a good listener," assured Tom, trying to get comfortable.

The werewolf gave him one last look before opening to the first page. In the middle of the tan paper was a photograph of four young boys. Two of them had black hair and looked even similar but the only difference was that the boy with dark eyes was taller. His counterpart wore golden-framed glasses and was ruffling his hair as the other black hair boy gave him a friendly push. 

"This is Sirius Black and this is James Potter," Remus pointed them out then Tom went back to inspecting the other two boys. The shortest one had sandy blond hair and water blue eyes. He wasn't exactly skinny but he wasn't to fat however the boy next to him was highly thin. Tom could easily recognize him as a younger Remus Lupin.

"This is Pettigrew and that little dork is me," Remus said after Tom got a good look at them. He also noticed the hatred in the older man's voice when he said his friend's name. Tom nodded as the Remus in the picture grinned a very wolfish grin.

"We were the biggest group of troublemakers that Hogwarts will ever remember," Remus said, smiling at the memory. "Basically James and Sirius played pranks on everyone, sparring only those that they had a crush on and sometimes not even then."

"Did you even help them out?"

"Of course," answered Remus. He sounded almost hurt that anyone would think that he wouldn't take place in the fun. "But I was the one who constantly reminded them that 'if we got caught' or my favorite 'If I get detention because of you two' of course it didn't bother James and Sirius. They could talk to each other with their mirrors." At seeing Tom's questioning look he added, "Don't ask."

"You said Potter, right?" Tom inquired, starring into the hazel eyes of one of the black hair boys.

"Yeah."

"Is he Harry Potter's father?"

"Actually he is and-" he flipped to the back of the book and showed Tom a picture of James when he was older, arm in arm with a beautiful young woman. She reminded him of Ruby except her eyes were brilliant emerald green. "-this is Lily Evans, his mother."

"She looks like someone I knew," Tom said quietly.

"Someone close?" asked Remus.

"Yeah," replied Tom, even quieter.

Remus noticed his discomfort and closed the book. "I think that's enough for one night. I'll show you some more maybe tomorrow but now it's getting late and I haven't even showed you to your room." Tom stood up and followed Remus down the hall and into a small but cozy bedroom. "It's not much but I hope you find it useable."

"No, don't worry. I love it," Tom said trying out the bed that was next to the wardrobe. Remus left him alone and closed the door. For once in his life Tom didn't feel like he was being forced to stay where he didn't want to be. As much as he wouldn't admit it he actually was beginning to like Remus's company. The werewolf seemed to understand when not to pressure him into talking or when he wanted to be alone.

Feeling suddenly tired he found that his cloths had already been put away and changed into some pajamas. He folded his robes and tucked them away into his trunk. Then something on top of his schoolbooks caught his attention: a piece of parchment. He picked it up and saw that it was a letter addressed to him and Lucius from Ruby. He sat down on his bed and read it:

Dear Blaze and Jet-Jaw,

I'm going on vacation this summer and my parents have invited both of you. Rid, I know right about now your thinking "I can't afford that" and, Lu, you're wondering about what Narcissa will say. Rid, you don't have to worry about it. The money is no problem. My parents are paying and they said if it's still a problem this can be your birthday and Christmas present. Now, Lu, about your girl…well actually she's coming to. I already asked her and we have it all planed out. Let me know as soon as you can.

"Star"

Ruby Rosewood

Tom re-read the letter three times before any thoughts registered through his mind. He hugged the letter tight as if afraid if he let go the parchment would disappear suddenly, never to be seen again. For the first time in his life he cried for his friends: he cried for the friends that he would never see again…

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A/N: Too mushy? Too short? You name it and I'll work on it. I'm bendable today. I actually am understanding Algebra at the moment!!! But the boy I like is going to get kicked out of our class soon…

GOOD CHARLOTTE LYRICS

"The Young And The Hopeless"

Hard days made me
Hard nights shaped me
I don't know they somehow saved me
And I know I'm making something out of this life they call nothing
I Take what i want
take what I need
you say it's wrong, but it's right for me
I won't look down
Won't say I'm sorry
I know that only god can judge me

[Chorus]
And if i make it through today
Will tomorrow be the same
Am i just running in place
And if i stumble and i fall
Should i get up and carry on
Will it all just be the same
Cause im young and im hopeless
im lost and i know this
im going nowhere fast thats what they say
im troublesome i've fallen
im angry at my father
its me against this world and i dont care
i dont care

no one in this industry
understands the life i lead
when i sing about my past
its not a gimmick, not an act
These critics, and these trust fund kids
try to tell me what punk is
but when i see them on the street they got nothing to say

[Chorus]
And if i make it through today
Will tomorrow be the same
Am i just running in place
And if i stumble and i fall
Should i get up and carry on
Will it all just be the same
Cause im young and im hopeless
im lost and i know this
im going nowhere fast thats what they say
im troublesome i've fallen
im angry at my father
its me agaisnt this world and i dont care
i dont care i dont care...and now i dont care
oooooo ooooo oooooo

im young and im hopeless
im lost and i know this
im going nowhere fast thats what they say
that im troublesome i've fallen
im angry at my father
its me agaisnt this world and i dont care
i dont care. i dont care. i dont care.