Disclaimer: I am not the owner of harry potter. Go away and play with your bunnies
This chapter is dedicated to W1cked Angel, the reviewer of the moment.
Chapter VI- Naughty by Nature
Hermione was thinking furiously now. She was never good at making up stories, that was usually Draco's job!
Chapter 3- Wiener Dogs
What kind of a stupid…"It all started at the final supper…ceremony…thingy," Hermione began. She clapped her hands over her mouth in shock.
What am I saying? I didn't want to say that! I thought I was the one in control he…Harry laughed like a stupid maniac. "Like omigod Hermione!" he squealed, "I thought you knew absolutely everything about Hogwarts! And you don't even know what the final ceremony is called." He giggled like a dhsjkfhajkdjhf damn fairy in a buuuuubble bath.
Hermione shook her head and squinted at Harry's bedroom walls as they contracted and expanded like a balloon. I feel like I'm in a Salvador Dali painting. What was going on? She grabbed the pen around her neck and shook it a bit. Stupid Weasley products. They always malfunction. The room slowly went t back into focus, and she sighed in relief.
Frowning, she grabbed Harry, who was now trying to lick his elbow.
The incredible urge to blurt out, "I wanna dance naked in a pool of chocolate sauce!" flew into Hermione's brain, but she suppressed it. Someone was having a bit too much fun here, and it definitely wasn't her.
"Listen to me!" she screamed into his face. "I was telling you a story, remember?"
He instantly sat down on his bed. "So tell me."
Finally!
Hermione cleared her throat, and began;
What the hell and I going to say, what the hell am I going to say, what the…..Her mouth flew open and said;
"Well, at my Hogwarts, I was having a nice end of year supper with Harry, Ron, and Ginny. I was sooooo sad about there being no more school, because I'm a bookworm and all, so I decided to go off to the Astronomy Tower to go drown my sorrows."
Hermione hoped that the inflection of the words "Astronomy Tower" was just a coincidence. If not, she knew where this speech was heading.
"Coincidence of coincidences, Draco Malfoy was there as well."
Great. Hermione willed her mouth to just shut right there, but it didn't work.
"You see, in my dimension, not only is Draco Malfoy is the hottest living sod to walk the earth, but he is also kind, caring and generous as well."
"So it's like a mirror universe then?" Harry wisecracked.
Hermione was not amused. "Oh, very funny Harry. As I was saying, this Draco Malfoy is unlike the guy in your world. He saw me in my angsty state, and comforted me. His hug turned to, well, something more."
"Oh gag."
Well, no, not really. But I wouldn't actually share that stuff with Harry.
Harry was now a sickly state of green. "You didn't…you know…."
She raised an eyebrow. "You do know what the Astronomy Tower is famous for, don't you?"
"Yes."
"Well," she paused dramatically, "We did. We made love right there on the hard stone floor."
Hermione cringed inwardly. Her mouth was developing a brain of it's own, and though that story was not entirely false, she still felt extremely guilty about abusing Harry's mind and imagination.
"Okay…"
"Yes. That is how I ended up with this." She held up her left hand with the glittering diamond on it. "A couple of hours ago, I was rummaging through my husband's recent publications, and I discovered these Harry Potter books. I opened the sixth one, and I ended up….here."
"Okay."
That made sense in a weird twisted way.
"So what am I supposed to do with you now?" Harry asked, scratching his head.
Hermione suddenly felt her jaw relax, and nothing funny came out of her mouth.
Hermione smiled. "Finally," she said, "You should take me to Hogwarts with you! I could meet all your friends."
Harry's eyes bulged open. "Hermione….Future Hermione, or whatever I should call you, do you think that there's another Hermione running around?"
"I never actually thought of that," she said. "I suppose it would be kind of neat to meet myself. It's something most people never have the chance of do…..
OOOOOOOOOTBCOOOOOOOOOOO
"I'm hungry," Harry announced.
Draco groaned, and turned away from the computer. "Go make yourself something then, meatball, or go fetch Dobby."
"Drac-o," he moaned, "You can do this everyday. I thought you wanted to watch these movies."
As soon as the words were out of his mouth, Draco jumped out of the chair. "Screw this," he said, quickly saving and shutting down the computer.
"I thought she hated having it shut down."
"I can always boot it up before she comes home." He excused. "Lets go watch us some movies."
Draco and Harry headed out the door, and down to the den. Dobby popped out of nowhere with a plate of nachos, and together the three of them sat down in the cozy couches.
"That was some program, or enchantment she has on that thing," Harry remarked, as Draco started up the movie. "It basically writes by itself."
"It has to be an enchantment," Draco mumbled, "If it was a program it would have gotten fucked up when you began screwing around with it." (a/n: too true)
"All I did was bump your elbow!" Harry protested. Draco just shook his head and tutted.
Dobby sat in the corner nervously, nibbling on his tortilla chip. Of course he wouldn't tell Master Draco what sort of enchantment was really going on. Doing that would mean confessing about reading Mistress Hermione's mail, something any good house elf would never dream of doing. But, of course, Dobby was not a good house elf. He was…..a special one.
There was a knock, and Dobby jumped up to answer it. An entrance appeared in the wall next to the television, and opened without warning, throwing the tiny house-elf into the screen. It was…..
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
A/N: YOU DECIDE! giggle Read and Review! (hint: Draco turned off the computer)
The Mod Squad
Elfaghetti: you lazy bugger! Update your story!
The Nauti Dolphin: Oh, Draco interfering is definitely a good thing….Thanks x2 hands you a giant cookie
Lildaisygirl24: they're about to watch….but who is at the door?
Malfille: why on earth would you be the only one who likes Nirvana? They were too awesomely awesome to be ignored (DIE COURTNEY LOVE!) Have you read Heavier than Heaven? thumbs up hands you a bottle of bleach
Startledsunshine: thank you very muchly
Allie-Dee: our dear friend the Sex God might poke his nose in a bit more.
MysticalSpirits: I hoped someone would pick that part up….harry is so fun to confuse ;)
W1cked Angel: HAHAHAHA! You rock!
Ridea: Gasp! You found out my secret!
Major issues 4 life: dirty things are always nice.
