The news about Binky and Fern spread rapidly through the school. While Fern's ego swelled ever larger as her friends and many kids she didn't know congratulated her on winning the Mini Moo voice role, Binky became the butt of one awful cow joke after another. By the time morning recess arrived, he was considering spending the rest of the day with a paper bag over his head. Not that it would do any good, as he was one of the biggest kids in the school.

A group of third-graders were laughing and mooing at him near the playground; he couldn't find it within him to clobber them, as they well knew. He rounded a corner of the school building to get away from them, only to run into the two people he least wanted to see under the circumstances...Molly and Rattles.

"Well, well," gloated Rattles with a sinister smirk. "If it isn't Binky 'Barn', the Dancing Cow."

"Got milk?" added Molly with an evil chuckle.

"You don't understand, guys," said Binky nervously.

"What don't we understand?" asked Molly, shrugging. "You dance around in a cow suit on TV. Seems pretty clear to me. What about you, Rattles?"

"Huh?" the boy grunted.

"Um...uh...you just don't understand." The sad-faced Binky tried to walk past his two friends, but they blocked his way.

"We've been keeping something from you, too," said Rattles in a menacing tone. "We're really cattle rustlers."

"And I see a big fat cow who could use a little rustling," Molly quipped. She and Rattles then pulled their hands from behind their backs, revealing that they were both carrying jump ropes.

Binky wasn't sure what "rustling" meant, but it sounded a lot like "wrestling", and he didn't relish the prospect of going toe-to-toe with two big kids armed with ropes. So he did the smartest thing he knew how. He turned and fled in terror.

The kids in the playground were treated to the bizarre sight of Molly and Rattles waving jump-rope lassoes over their heads and chasing Binky in circles around the swingset and jungle gym. "Get along, little dogie!" taunted Rattles as he and Molly slowly but surely gained ground on the frightened Binky.

When Acting Principal Ratburn arrived on the scene, he saw Binky lying on his stomach, while Molly pulled up on his arms and Rattles tied the helpless boy's hands and feet together with a jump rope. "We're gonna have hamburger tonight," Molly exulted.

But Mr. Ratburn had other ideas. "Miss McDonald, Mr. Ratola..." he intoned after clearing his throat.

"Hey, you're not the principal," Rattles protested.

"Yes, he is," Molly informed him. "Mr. Haney's sick. Don't you ever pay attention in class?"

"Once you're finished untying Mr. Barnes, I'd like to see the two of you in my office," Ratburn ordered.

"Yeah, yeah, we know the drill," groused Rattles as he untied the rope to set Binky free.

While Binky was recovering from the ordeal of being hogtied, Francine was leading Dolly to an outside corner of the school building where she usually shared secrets with her friends (she had never trusted the girls' room since the incident with Rattles' listening device). When they arrived and Francine had looked around to make sure they were alone, she started to confide her feelings.

"I believe you when you say you're a witch, Dolly," Francine half-whispered. "I've been...I mean, Sue Ellen's been all over the world, and she's met people who said they were witches, and they could do some pretty amazing things, but you've got them beat."

While Dolly wondered whether to take this as a compliment, Francine went on. "I'd like to ask you to do something for me, Dolly. You see, I'm in love with a boy, but he doesn't love me back."

Dolly thought for a second, then grinned deviously. "Oh, I understand. You want me to put a love spell on him."

"Um, basically, yes," said Francine hesitantly.

"I knew it wouldn't be long before someone came to me with such a request," said Dolly. "My mother taught me how to make a powerful love potion, but she told me to use it very carefully. Some people become angry and hurt when they realize that someone used magic to make them fall in love. On the other hand, some people stay in love after the potion wears off. It's impossible to predict."

"Will you do it?" Francine asked pleadingly.

"That depends," Dolly answered. "First of all, who's the boy?"

Francine glanced around furtively to see if anyone was listening, and then whispered, "Arthur."

"Hmm." Dolly's eyes widened with interest. "Has he a lady love? I mean, a girlfriend?"

"No," replied Francine. "I...don't think he's interested in girls yet."

"Well, the potion would certainly fix that," said Dolly confidently. "But the effects only last for a day. After that, he may love you, or hate you, or his feelings may not change at all."

"If he only loves me for a day, that's better than nothing," said Francine, looking at the ground.

Dolly turned as if to walk away, saying, "I'll think about it."

Francine grabbed her before she could leave. "One more question. Can you make a potion that will cure love? Because if I can't have a potion to make Arthur love me, then I want one that will make me forget my love for him."

Her request seemed to alarm Dolly, who didn't reply.

"Oh, don't tell me," said Francine, suddenly looking disappointed. "That would only last a day, too."

"I'm afraid so," Dolly admitted. "I'll make the love potion, Francine, but I'll need some ingredients. Is there a market nearby that sells eye of newt?"

----

The kids in Miss Cosma's kindergarten class were also enjoying playtime. The teacher had provided them with miniature pairs of scissors, and they were cutting patterns out of folded paper. D.W. was proudly holding up the paper doll chain she had created for Vicita and Dallin to see, when Nadine strolled over, clutching scissors and a paper snowflake of her own manufacture.

"Oh, that's pretty, D.W.," she said with barely concealed malice. "Too bad your dolls have to split up now."

"Huh?" Before D.W. could figure out what she meant, Nadine raised her scissors and cut in half one of the dolls in her chain, leaving her with three and a half dolls in one hand and two and a half in the other.

Now angry, D.W. threw down her ruined doll chain, grabbed the pair of scissors that Dallin was holding, and began to chase after the fleeing Nadine. "I'll get you, Nadine!" she bellowed. "I'll cut off all your hair!"

Miss Cosma witnessed the altercation between the girls, and quickly placed herself between them. "No fighting with scissors!" she barked. "Time outs for both of you!"

The antagonistic girls dropped their scissors and stormed away, D.W. into one corner and Nadine into another. Miss Cosma folded her arms and cleared her throat. "In the SAME corner," she commanded.

D.W. and Nadine turned and glowered at each other. Neither was willing to move to the other's corner. "Both of you, to the center of the wall," Miss Cosma ordered, walking towards them.

When the two girls had reached the middle of the wall, they turned their backs to each other and stared bitterly into space. Miss Cosma bent over and addressed them. "Why are you two fighting all the time? You used to be best friends."

"She started it," D.W. grumbled. "She cut my paper doll."

"You started it first," Nadine retorted. "You drew a funny face on my fish painting."

"You started it before I did," D.W. countered. "You made fun of my initials."

"I did not, Dirt Wad!" snapped Nadine.

"Did too!"

"Did not!" Somehow the girls managed to carry on an argument without turning to face each other.

"Cut it out, girls," the teacher admonished them. "Nadine, it's not nice to call people names."

"But, Miss Cosma," Nadine protested, "I only made fun of D.W.'s name because she..."

"Because she what?"

Nadine put a finger on her chin and thought for a moment. Then she looked up and said, "I don't remember. But it was really bad."

Miss Cosma turned to face D.W., who shrugged. "Don't look at me."

----

The school day didn't improve for Binky, who was about to put his lunch down at a table where Arthur, Francine, George, and Muffy were seated, only to see the four kids place their outstretched fingers on their temples and say, "Mooooo."

Binky sighed and carried his lunch tray to another table. While watching him leave, Muffy remarked to the others, "He wouldn't sit with us. How rude."

The unhappy bulldog boy eventually found his way to a table where Fern and Adil were sitting and eating across from each other. "Hi, guys," he greeted them, forcing a smile.

"Hey, Binky," said Fern. "Go ahead, sit with us. We won't make fun of you."

As the gratified Binky seated himself next to Fern, he grinned and said, "Fern, you are beautiful."

"Oh, cut it out," Fern grumbled.

The exchange between Fern and Binky confused Adil. "Binky said you are beautiful," he said to Fern. "Why are you angry?"

"Because..." Fern strained her brain to think of the reason, but gave up in frustration. "Oh, I don't know."

"I was only kidding," said Binky as he took a bite of meat loaf.

"So you think Fern is not beautiful?" Adil asked him. Binky nearly spit out his mouthful of meat loaf.

Fern struggled to come up with a way to explain the situation to the odd-mannered Turkish boy. "It's like this, Adil," she began. "In America, when a girl wants to be called beautiful, she puts on a pretty dress, and lipstick, and makeup, and all that. If a girl comes to class looking the same way she looks every day, then you don't have to call her beautiful. But you should never tell a girl she isn't beautiful. That hurts her feelings."

"Unless she's so ugly that people are getting sick just from looking at her," Binky joked. Fern gave him a quick elbow jab in the side.

Adil appeared to be deep in thought. "If a girl wears a pretty dress, lipstick, and makeup, then I should call her beautiful," he muttered to himself. "If she does not wear a pretty dress, lipstick, and makeup, then I should not call her beautiful. But I should never tell her that she is not beautiful."

"I think he's got it," said Binky elatedly.

"By George, he's got it!" said Fern in triumph.

Adil lowered his face. "It is hard to remember everything that I should do," he lamented.

"You think you have it hard," said Fern, smirking. "Try being a girl."

TBC