Disclaimer: None of the characters belong to me. The songs also belong to their respective owners.

A/N: So, I just started watching Alias, borrowing my best friend's copy of Season 1, but I can already tell this is a great show. So, I thought I'd write a short little, humorous story to go along with one of the earlier episodes. I don't know the episode name but this story is set somewhere around the time Francie finds out that Charlie is cheating on her. So, remember this is my first Alias story, so go easy and remember it's meant to be humorous. And I know the title's a little off, but it was all I could come up with. So, please review and, of course, enjoy.

It was all ready late into the night, the clock inching toward two A.M., and Sydney Bristow knew that if she didn't do anything to cheer up her best friend any time soon, she and Will Tippin were going to be sitting up for the rest of their lives attempting to comfort her. The one down side that that plan, which had just entered her head as she watched Francie toss back her third tequila shot in two minutes, was that she had no idea just what would cheer Francie up aside from alcohol. And they were running low on that too.

Will seemed to be feeling the same way, for he was making tiny basketballs out of an old newspaper and throwing them into the fire place. It had been a good hour since anyone had reminded Francie that she was better off without her cheating boyfriend, Charlie, or offered another comforting phrase like that because Francie, frankly, wasn't in the mood to hear it anymore. Sydney was about to send her into one of the spare bedrooms with the remaining liquor and call it a night.

"What I don't understand," Francie began suddenly, sounding like she was seconds away from having a breakdown, and ruining Sydney's idea of getting any sleep that night, "is why he would cheat on me. Me." She poured herself another shot. "He had it good."

Will rolled another ball. "I'm sure he did." He remarked, almost inaudibly and threw the ball across the room, where it promptly landed among the others.

Sydney rested her hand on her best friend's shoulder. "Men are just stupid, Francie, we know this." She wasn't quite sure it was the most comforting phrase in the word but it was all she got at two in the morning. The only hope she had of getting any sleep would be if Francie suddenly passed out from alcohol consumption.

Francie looked at her friend with tears in her eyes. "She wasn't even pretty." She protested weakly. "Why?" Another round of sobs followed this question, as did another shot of tequila.

Sydney was about to say something, anything, when Will grabbed her arm and got her attention. "Can I see you in the kitchen for a minute?" He questioned, standing up and pulling Sydney up after him before she could agree.

With an apologetic look at Francie, Sydney followed Will out of the living room and walked the short distance to the kitchen. As soon as they were out of ear shot, Will grabbed Sydney and forced her to face him. "This is going nowhere." He hissed. "And I mean, nowhere. How much tequila can one person drink anyway?"

"I don't know." Sydney pulled out of his grasp. "But she's really upset. We have to be there for her."

"Well, I can I be there for Francie in my own bed?" Will questioned. "Because that's the sort of togetherness I think would be really helpful right now."

Sydney gave him a patronizing look. "C'mon Will, Francie was there when you broke up with your girlfriend months ago. Remember? She brought you your favorite ice cream and a copy of Toy Story. It sure helped you."

Will shrugged. "Then let's go down to the video store and get the movie. Then I'll go home." He suggested, though he knew that Sydney wasn't going to budge an inch. It was one of the things he loved about her, her stubbornness...though right now he figured he loved his feather pillow and soft bed more.

"All we have to do is cheer Francie up enough to take her mind off Charlie so she doesn't cry herself to sleep." Sydney told him. "Then you can go home."

Will raised an eyebrow. "How 'come Francie is the only one who gets to sleep?" He questioned but Sydney didn't answer. "I've got a story due for the paper tomorrow, it's deadline and-"

"And I've got two physics papers due tomorrow and I'm working all day at the bank." Sydney interrupted. "But Francie is my best friend, so I'm going to be there for her." She shrugged. "But you can go home if you want..."

Will stared at her. "Now when you say that you know I'm going to stay." He remarked. "I'm not that heartless."

Sydney grinned. "I know. I have you wrapped around my finger, Will Tippin." She winked. "All we have to do is find out how to-" She stopped short, her eyes catching something that had been stored in the back of the pantry, more then likely so that it would be forgotten and never used again. A smile spread across her first. "Perfect."

Will didn't like the look in her sparkling eyes. "What's perfect?" He questioned, hoping to elicit a smile. "Sydney, what's perfect?" He followed her gaze and frowned when he saw what she was staring at, his blood running cold. "No, Sydney...no way."

Sydney's smile grew even wider and she repeated that same word again. "Perfect."


It seemed as though Francie was just beginning to feel the affects of the alcohol in her system as she gazed up at her best friend through clouded eyes. "You guys don't have to be nice to me anymore." She mumbled. "I get the message, you want to go to be. You don't want to stay up with me."

Sydney knelt in front of her friend and took her hands. "That is not true." She denied sharply. "I love you Francie and I don't have anything better to do then cheer you up."

Francie didn't seem like she quite believed what her friend was saying as she allowed Sydney to led her into the kitchen, where Will was putting the finishing touches on their last ditch effort to cheer her up. She had no idea just what Sydney and Will were planning and just why it involved the kitchen but she was too tired, too heartbroken and almost too drunk to try and figure it out.

"Maybe." Francie said in response to Sydney's claims. "But Will doesn't; Will wants to go home and sleep."

Sydney shook her head as they entered the kitchen. "That's not true, honey, Will loves you too." She gestured toward the set-up sprawled before them in the kitchen. "That's why he's going to sing first."

At first, Francie had no idea what Sydney was talking about until she looked into the kitchen and saw what Will had been working on for the last ten minutes. The karaoke machine she had bought Sydney as a joke in their freshman year was sitting on the kitchen counter, leaning a little close to the skin, with a pile of CDs stacked beside it. Will had managed to take several lamps from several of the furnished rooms in the house and situate them so that they created a spotlight on the kitchen table, which was undeniably the stage for the little impromptu karaoke session.

Will was standing beside the karaoke machine, thumbing through the CDs and nursing a glass of tequila, not looking too pleased that he had been volunteered to humiliate himself first. First could already tell that he was consuming as much alcohol as possible before he had to take the "stage" and belt out the song his choice, horribly off-key with the karaoke machine.

Francie looked over at Sydney and smiled slightly. "You guys are going to karaoke to cheer me up?" She questioned, as though that fact weren't obvious. "That's so sweet." She knew that Sydney, for one, hated any sort of public humiliation and Will was the same way.

Sydney smiled. "You're going to sing too." She informed her friend. "But for now, we get to sit back and watch the show." She grinned at Will as she pulled out one of the kitchen chairs of her friend. "Ready?" She asked.

"No." Will mumbled, tossing back the rest of his drink and grimacing. "All right, here goes nothing." He put a CD into the machine and picked up the microphone. "You ladies have such a pathetic CD collection that I had to make due with what you had. So that song isn't the best."

Francie sat down and retrieved the bottle of tequila, refilling Will's glass for herself. "Just sing." She commanded, smiling and taking a sip before offering the glass to Sydney, who gladly took it. If she was going to have to sing too, she was going to need all the artificial courage she could get.

Will cleared his throat nervously and climbed up on the table, unable to believe that he had allowed Sydney and her sweet smile to talk him into what he was about to do. "Okay." He gave the signal for Sydney to start the karaoke machine, turning on the microphone. He glared at Sydney and Francie as the song started. "Don't laugh." He commanded.

"We won't." Sydney promised, though she doubted it was one she could keep because if the song was what she thought it was, then there was no way she wasn't going to be able to keep from laughing.

Indeed, it was the song Sydney was suspecting and she almost cracked up right then and there. Only Will would karaoke to Vanilla Ice. Will reluctantly started 'singing' along with the music coming from the speakers. "All right stop, collaborate and listen, Ice is back with my brand new invention. Something grabs a hold of me tightly, flow like a hawk daily and nightly."

Francie dissolved into giggles, clapping her hands together. "That's great Will." She laughed, interrupting his fifteen minutes of dining room fame. "You have to dance." She commanded, clearly under the influence of her friend tequila.

Will shook his head. "No. Way." He said, deadpan. "There is no way I'm dancing."

Sydney couldn't help but laugh as well. "Oh, come on Will, just a little dance." She smiled at him.

To the background music of "ice, ice baby," Will swayed his hips slightly, his face turning bright red, for a grand total of five seconds before he clicked off the microphone and hopped off the table. "Okay, I sang, I danced, I'm finished."

Francie smiled. "That was great Will." She grinned, still laughing.

Sydney finished the remaining tequila in the glass and nodded in agreement. "It really was." She told him.

Will raised an eyebrow. "Don't think flattery will get you out of singing, Bristow." He told her frankly. "It's your turn." He handed her the microphone.

Francie turned to look at her best friend. "I've got to see this." She told Sydney. "I don't think I've ever heard you sing before."

Sydney reluctantly got to her feet. "There's a reason for that." She mumbled, shooting a glare at Will as he grinned at her, taking his spot beside Francie. With a weary sigh, she headed over to the piles of CDs to choose the song that would be her humiliation for the week.

After careful consideration, she finally decided on a song and slowly slunk toward the dining room table. Will noted her hesitation and smiled at her. "This isn't seeming like such a good idea anymore is it?" He questioned.

Sydney didn't justify his comment with an answer, though that was exactly what she was thinking. She had hoped that by the time Will got finished with his round of karaoke that Francie would be so cheered up that she didn't need round two. But, sadly, that didn't seem like the case.

As soon as Sydney climbed onto the table, squinting against the light of the lamps, Will turned on the CD player. The music started and Sydney swallowed, clutching the microphone tightly; it was like the first grade talent show all over again when she had decided to sing a song from the Disney movie Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs and had ended up rushing off stage before the first verse was out of her mouth.

Now the audience was slightly less intimating but she couldn't help but attempt to deal with her new found attack of stage fright. She found it funny that she could face down men with guns and disengage nuclear weapons but she couldn't sing in front of her friends.

When the song started, Sydney opened her mouth to join in with the female singer. "Where have all the good men gone and where are all the Gods?" She sang, her voice low and shaky. "Where's the street-wise Hercules to fight the rising odds? Isn't there a white knight upon a fiery steed? Late at night I toss and turn and dream of what I need."

Will grinned and her a clapped, as did Francie, who let out a whistle. "All right, Syd." She called, as though they were in a crowded club and not a kitchen. "Sing it babe."

Sydney smiled as she started the chorus, having enough alcohol in her body to convince her to strut across the short surface of the table. "I need a hero." She sang, louder now. "I'm holding out for a hero until the end of the night." She shook her hips slightly as she strode on the table. "He's gotta be strong and he's gotta be fast and he's gotta be fresh from the fight."

Will whistled loudly, now deciding that karaoke had been a very good idea. Sydney was feeling quite sure of herself as well, and so she decided to drop to the surface of the table for a second before popping back up to her feet, almost as though she were sliding down a striper's poll.

However, on the way back up, Sydney lost her balance and tumbled off the table, landing roughly on the kitchen floor and sending the microphone bouncing across the tile. "Ow." She mumbled, blinking her eyes and trying to clear her head. She could hear Francie laughing at her tumble and Will trying very hard not to as he attempted to help her to her feet.

Once Sydney had regained her footing once more, she gingerly touched her butt. "Okay, that's enough of that." She decided, shutting off the song on the karaoke machine.

"It might have ended badly," Will told her, allowing her to take his seat, "but it was pretty hot while it lasted."

Sydney sighed. "Yeah, yeah." She mumbled, sure that she was going to feel the ache her humiliation in the morning. Good thing Francie was probably too drunk to remember it in the morning and that Will would never tease her about falling off the kitchen table, otherwise she'd have to join the Witness Protection Program.

Sydney looked over at Francie. "All right, your turn." She reminded her friend, who promptly hopped out of her seat. Francie had been born to flaunt herself in front of an audience, no matter how small, and doing karaoke in front of her best friends was the best medicine.

It didn't take her long to choose her song and Francie eagerly hopped up on the kitchen table, swaying slightly from the tequila flowing through her system. She cleared her throat and Sydney turned the karaoke machine on once more. Without looking a tad bit nervous, Francie launched into her song of choice: the Dixie Chicks' rendition of "You Can't Hurry Love."

"I need, love, love to ease my mind." Francie proclaimed. "I need to find, find someone to call mine. But Momma said: you can't hurry love, no you just have to wait. She said love don't come easy, it's a game of give and take." She began to strut her stuff across the table with more assurance then Sydney had shown, much to the amusement of her friends. In fact, Francie looked like she were auditioning for a role in Coyote Ugly.

Will grinned and shook his head. "It's the alcohol." He whispered to Sydney. "I wish I was that drunk."

Sydney nodded knowingly. "I would too, after that Vanilla Ice impersonation." She whispered back, smiling.

Will glared at her. "You should you won't laugh." He pointed out like a pouting child. "You didn't have any Lynard Skynard, otherwise we wouldn't have had that problem."

Sydney's smile grew even wider. "Right, I could have totally seen you rocking out to 'Freebird.'" She started laughing, the mental imagine enough to send her into fits of giggles.

Will rolled his eyes. "Fine, laugh if you want. But I've always been more of a 'Sweet Home Alabama' guy anyway." He mumbled.

On the table, Francie continued to sing, oblivious to her friends discussion. "I can't hurry love, no it'll just have to wait. You have to trust good time, no matter how long it takes." She sang. "But how many heart heartaches much I stand before I find someone to let me live again." She stopped abruptly when she saw Will and Sydney whispering together. "Excuse me, can't you stop your flirting until I've finished?"

Sydney and Will looked over at Francie, both of them hurrying to defend their whispering. Francie held up her hand, unwilling to listen to what they had to say. "You know, if you guys don't want to listen to me sing, I'll go find someone that does." She informed them, hopping off the table and tossing the microphone aside, not seeming to notice that it landed in the sink. "I think McGill's is still open." She muttered, offhandedly to herself.

Sydney watched her friend. "Francie, are you really going out?" She questioned, though she didn't doubt it. This was Francie after all, queen of the random decisions.

"Sure." Francie shrugged, grabbing her car keys. "Why not? I'm in the mood to karaoke." And with that, she headed out the backdoor, slamming it behind her.

Sydney and Will stared at the spot where Francie had vanished for a moment before turning to look at each other. Within a few seconds, they both burst out laughing. When he managed to regain his composure, Will took a deep breath. "I'd say that this night was very successful."

"Yes." Sydney agreed with a smile. "I'd say it was."