Thanks once more to all reviewers; replies are at the end of the chapter.
My incessant use of weasels may have scared some people off. Alas.
Chapter 8: Some people just shouldn't be magicians
As I told you in chapter 4 shortly after the introduction of the flying pitchfork, (which has now gone to Broadway if you're interested), anyway, Morpheus took up the ghastly art of Necromancy so as to bring Neo and Trinity back from the dead, this worked, but it was about the only thing that did.
Morpheus first decided to try and resurrect the kid so as to work out any potential, metaphorical bugs. The kid wasn't so much resurrected as he was turned into a cactus. This cactus was later stolen by Zee and hidden on commander Locke's chair. It took him half a day to get all the bristles out of his arse, and he couldn't sit down again for a week. No one really cared.
But I digress, after the successful resurrection of Neo and Trinity, Morpheus went on to experiment with forms of magic, his first idea was to make the gnarled, mouldy excuse for a pineapple that the machines had given humanity fresh and new in the hopes of growing many more pineapples.
This all sounds well and good, unfortunately, Morpheus was too lazy to ask Councillor Hamann for some grey hairs, (an essential ingredient for a pineapple multiplication spell,) so instead took some grey steel shavings from one of the dead sentinels in the dock. Vincent, who was busy picking dead sentinels off of the floor stared at him for a few seconds but decided not to interfere.
The result of Morpheus' laziness was fifty pineapple-sentinel hybrids that whizzed from here to there, decapitating and disembowelling as they went. Twelve people were killed before all the 'pineitels' were shot down. Morpheus was given a clip round the ear by both Niobe and the woman whose son was on the Gnosis, (she'd been doing that a lot in recent months).
Morpheus still insisted on being a magician however, Link suggested that he emulate David Blaine and go without food for 40 days whilst sealed in a glass box. He said that a perk of this would be that the rest of Zion would be free of him for a month, and everyone would be much happier. Morpheus sniffed in irritation and broke Link's left leg with a crowbar.
After a good night's sleep, Morpheus decided to try and rebuild the Nebuchadnezzar from the singed remnants that lay in anonymous tunnel somewhere underneath Munich.
Morpheus was determined not to let laziness get in his way this time, which was largely irrelevant seeing as all the things he needed to throw into the cauldron he had made from 4 teeth and a chair were easy enough to obtain.
The first item was three cubic millimetres of cotton, polyester or tweed. For this, Morpheus simply cut a three cubic millimetre square out of his trousers. This took him four hours, after he was finished; he decided to take a break for lunch.
The second item was ice. (Don't ask me why, I'm just making this up as I go along), whereas most people would just freeze some water, Morpheus decided to try and condense water vapour in the air and then freeze that. The Bunsen burner he borrowed from Trinity was more rust then anything else however and promptly exploded, thus setting fire to Morpheus' domicile, thereby forcing him to cut another three cubic millimetre square out of his trousers.
In the end his better judgement was overpowered by laziness and just threw some bile in.
Big mistake, this resulted in a huge vomiting moth appearing in the dock and setting up residence there. This didn't make Vincent's job any easier seeing as the beast kept throwing him from one side of the dock to the other.
Other then this however, the moth didn't really pose any threat to anyone so it was allowed to stay in the dock. It soon got bored however and left to seek a new home on the moon.
Morpheus was forced to clean up all the vomit from the dock as punishment for his reckless ways with sorcery. Three 'runners' like the ones in that final Animatrix story, the name of which I've forgotten, arrived to give Vincent a hand cleaning up all the sentinels, and Link's leg healed nicely.
***********************************************************
I might make this the last story, its getting a bit repetitive and I'm running out of ideas. If I'm met with protests, I may continue. I doubt that'll happen however.
Right, now for replying,
Angel-of-lightness: A poor choice of words if the unthinkable has happened, anyway, I hope that a Flash program finds its way to your claws soon, and thanks for reviewing.
Agent Josie: People stared at my sister when she started carrying an umbrella shaped like a bee around with her. I've found it's usually things like that and funny earphones that get stares. Anyway, thanks for reviewing.
Tai Wilson: The Merovingian had to perish; maybe I should have had Wanderer go along with the assassination for a while before changing his mind and returning to decapitate the guy. Oh well, thanks for reviewing.
thereisnobrain: The Microsoft spelling checkeriser has at last stopped questioning me. HA! Oh shit its back! Um anyway, thanks for reviewing.
My incessant use of weasels may have scared some people off. Alas.
Chapter 8: Some people just shouldn't be magicians
As I told you in chapter 4 shortly after the introduction of the flying pitchfork, (which has now gone to Broadway if you're interested), anyway, Morpheus took up the ghastly art of Necromancy so as to bring Neo and Trinity back from the dead, this worked, but it was about the only thing that did.
Morpheus first decided to try and resurrect the kid so as to work out any potential, metaphorical bugs. The kid wasn't so much resurrected as he was turned into a cactus. This cactus was later stolen by Zee and hidden on commander Locke's chair. It took him half a day to get all the bristles out of his arse, and he couldn't sit down again for a week. No one really cared.
But I digress, after the successful resurrection of Neo and Trinity, Morpheus went on to experiment with forms of magic, his first idea was to make the gnarled, mouldy excuse for a pineapple that the machines had given humanity fresh and new in the hopes of growing many more pineapples.
This all sounds well and good, unfortunately, Morpheus was too lazy to ask Councillor Hamann for some grey hairs, (an essential ingredient for a pineapple multiplication spell,) so instead took some grey steel shavings from one of the dead sentinels in the dock. Vincent, who was busy picking dead sentinels off of the floor stared at him for a few seconds but decided not to interfere.
The result of Morpheus' laziness was fifty pineapple-sentinel hybrids that whizzed from here to there, decapitating and disembowelling as they went. Twelve people were killed before all the 'pineitels' were shot down. Morpheus was given a clip round the ear by both Niobe and the woman whose son was on the Gnosis, (she'd been doing that a lot in recent months).
Morpheus still insisted on being a magician however, Link suggested that he emulate David Blaine and go without food for 40 days whilst sealed in a glass box. He said that a perk of this would be that the rest of Zion would be free of him for a month, and everyone would be much happier. Morpheus sniffed in irritation and broke Link's left leg with a crowbar.
After a good night's sleep, Morpheus decided to try and rebuild the Nebuchadnezzar from the singed remnants that lay in anonymous tunnel somewhere underneath Munich.
Morpheus was determined not to let laziness get in his way this time, which was largely irrelevant seeing as all the things he needed to throw into the cauldron he had made from 4 teeth and a chair were easy enough to obtain.
The first item was three cubic millimetres of cotton, polyester or tweed. For this, Morpheus simply cut a three cubic millimetre square out of his trousers. This took him four hours, after he was finished; he decided to take a break for lunch.
The second item was ice. (Don't ask me why, I'm just making this up as I go along), whereas most people would just freeze some water, Morpheus decided to try and condense water vapour in the air and then freeze that. The Bunsen burner he borrowed from Trinity was more rust then anything else however and promptly exploded, thus setting fire to Morpheus' domicile, thereby forcing him to cut another three cubic millimetre square out of his trousers.
In the end his better judgement was overpowered by laziness and just threw some bile in.
Big mistake, this resulted in a huge vomiting moth appearing in the dock and setting up residence there. This didn't make Vincent's job any easier seeing as the beast kept throwing him from one side of the dock to the other.
Other then this however, the moth didn't really pose any threat to anyone so it was allowed to stay in the dock. It soon got bored however and left to seek a new home on the moon.
Morpheus was forced to clean up all the vomit from the dock as punishment for his reckless ways with sorcery. Three 'runners' like the ones in that final Animatrix story, the name of which I've forgotten, arrived to give Vincent a hand cleaning up all the sentinels, and Link's leg healed nicely.
***********************************************************
I might make this the last story, its getting a bit repetitive and I'm running out of ideas. If I'm met with protests, I may continue. I doubt that'll happen however.
Right, now for replying,
Angel-of-lightness: A poor choice of words if the unthinkable has happened, anyway, I hope that a Flash program finds its way to your claws soon, and thanks for reviewing.
Agent Josie: People stared at my sister when she started carrying an umbrella shaped like a bee around with her. I've found it's usually things like that and funny earphones that get stares. Anyway, thanks for reviewing.
Tai Wilson: The Merovingian had to perish; maybe I should have had Wanderer go along with the assassination for a while before changing his mind and returning to decapitate the guy. Oh well, thanks for reviewing.
thereisnobrain: The Microsoft spelling checkeriser has at last stopped questioning me. HA! Oh shit its back! Um anyway, thanks for reviewing.
