Naru: Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!! Ding, dong the SI is dead!

Lee3: You really are an idiot.

Naru: What do you mean?!

Lee3: Did you really think I would kill off my character just like that?

Naru: No.

Lee3: Yes you did (glares at Naru) admit it.

Naru: (starts crying) Okay, for a brief moment I thought I found salvation.

Lee3: Your only salvation is when this fic is over.

Naru: WWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH (runs away)!!!!

Lee3: I made her cry (bursts into laughter). I didn't think she had that emotion.

Sarah: Shouldn't you be explaining the disclaimer now?

Lee3: You're anxious to get started aren't you?

Sarah: Duh, I get a decent role in this chapter.

Lee3: You looked ahead didn't you?

Sarah: (smiles) Yep.

Lee3: I assumed you would, so I put itching powder in your beanie hat?

Sarah: WHAT (starts scratching her head)?!

Lee3: Better shower up.

Sarah: AAAHHH, IT ITCHES (runs away)!!!

Lee3: I hate when people do that. Anyway, you should all know by now that I don't own the Love Hina characters or the series. If I did, Seta would be a better driver and wouldn't bleed so much when Haruka punched him...in fact he would actually block. Anyway, Renegade and Angelica make their last stand along with a few friends. I'm also introducing two one-shot characters. One more thing if you have never seen the show "Titus" you might get confused as the chapter progresses. Okay that about covers IT!!!!

Reawakening: 3 Days Remaining

Keitaro: Lee, get up.

Su: Wake up, I don't want to lose a playmate.

Sarah: Nor do I, the Prankster Gangsta can't die on us!

Mutsumi: Oh my, he's starting to look stiff.

Seta & Haruka: Uh, that's not good.

Motoko: Lee, wake up you fiend (starts crying)! WAKE UP!!!

(12:00 midnight five days later)

Motoko: (Just left Keitaro's room where Lee is still "supposedly dead", while Keitaro watches over him) I can't believe he's dead, but how can someone be full of life one second and then dies all of a sudden.

(Inside the room)

Keitaro: You know, it's funny the way Motoko was talking to you it was like she liked you or something...(laugh) yeah right!

(Author interruption)

Lee3: Basically Motoko was saying how she respected and sort of liked Lee FOR AN HOUR!!! I just didn't feel like writing all that mushy crap as well as taking Motoko even more out of character than she already is. Now back to the story.

(Keitaro fell asleep one hour later)

Lee: (wakes up and walks to the bathroom) Goddammit, what the hell does Fenir get off telling me the transformation takes five days to complete and in the mean time kills the host for one day and leaves him/her comatose for an additional four! I just hope this doesn't happen next time (does his business).

Lobo: At least you're still alive.

Lee: Shut up Lobo or I'll stab you.

Lobo: I'm in your body so if you try to stab me you'll stab yourself.

Lee: I guess you forgot that if I stab myself with my sword it will open a void to where you are so only you will get hurt!

Lobo: Good point. (quiets down)

Lee: Stupid asshole, just because you're a wise old wolf spirit doesn't mean you know enough to be a smart-ass (flushes the toilet and goes back to sleep).

(Morning)

Lee: (wakes up again) Yay, it's morning (silence)! Dammit, where is everyone.

(In the Lobby)

Keitaro: Well guys what do we do now?

Naru: He's been dead for five days so I think we should...

Motoko: Don't even finish that sentence (point her sword at Naru).

Sarah: Face it girl, he's dead and we're gonna have to bury him sometime, he's gonna stink pretty soon.

Motoko: (goes berserk) No, it's not true (about to swing her weapon at Sarah, but Lee stops Motoko from doing so)!!

Lee: Burying would be a good idea, except for the fact that I'M STILL ALIVE (throws Motoko into the wall)!!!

Shinobu: B-but you were dead for five days!

Lee: No, I was dead for 24 hours, I just didn't wake up for the other 96 hours.

(A/N: 96 hours is four days. For the rest of this chapter I am going to parody the style of that show "Titus" uses.)

Shinobu: Could you explain what happened while you were unconscious?

Lee's Inner thought: Explain? How could I explain how I've been dead for one day and comatose for four?

Lee: (annoyed) I was asleep and couldn't dream.

(An earthquake occurred for 2 minutes.)

L.I.T.: Yay, it's the Mall of the Dead!

Kitsune: What was that?

Lee: I think I know what that is...follow me.

(Outside)

Naru: What is that?

Su: It's a...

Lee: Dimensional gateway...

Keitaro: Does that mean..?

Lee: No, I have another three days.

Shinobu: You're only gonna be here for three more days?!

Lee: Yeah, didn't Motoko tell you?

(Everyone looks at Motoko)

Motoko: Oops, I forgot.

L.I.T.: You forgot? How do you forget something like that when you had five fuckin' days to tell the others?!

Lee: (Has Motoko in a headlock) I knew your whole family was stupid, but you, YOU I thought had a brain...guess not.

L.I.T.: (Holds a card that says) "You thought wrong dumbass."

Shinobu: Should we go in?

Su: I wanna study this gateway (smiles)!

Lee: No need. I already know what's on the other side.

Sarah: Has anyone told you how freaky you are?

Lee: No, but you're the first person whose asked me that question.

Sarah: Oh...okay.

Lee: Do you all have money on you?

Everyone: No.

Lee: Good, you won't need it. Now c'mon (steps through).

Naru: I'm not going in there.

Motoko: (annoyed) Naru, for once Lee isn't trying to pull a prank or kill you.

Naru: You don't know that (Sarah, Su, Shinobu, Motoko, and Kitsune stepped through)! (Sarcastic) Thanks for your support.

L.I.T.: Yes, I have been trying to kill Naru, but all attempts have failed because she always survives.

(Flashback)

(Lee shoots Naru several times with a laser gun. 20 seconds Naru gets up.)

Attempt 2:

Naru: I love this day.

Lee: (from far away) I will get you soon enough Naru (Throws a grenade that lands at Naru's feet. Then he teleports in front of Naru, beats her up DBZ style and then teleports away before the grenade explodes. Two minutes later Naru got up and walked away and the grenade didn't explode. He then picked it up.). This grenade nearly took out Angelica, why didn't this thing explode (grenade explodes and Lee was burned and really pissed off)? Gggggrrrrrrrrr!!!!

Attempt 3:

Lee: If I can't kill Naru I can at least fuck up her day. (Aims a bazooka at Naru who was standing at the end of the hall.) Eat this bitch! (Fires a steel ball at Naru, but she left and Haruka took her place and the ball hit her right in the crotch.)

Haruka: GODDAMMIT (falls to the ground)!!!

Lee: Damn, well at least I ruined Haruka's day, which is like me ruining an older Naru's day. Good thing I hate this lady too.

(End Flashback)

(On the other side of the gate)

Naru: What is this place?

Kitsune: It looks like a bunch of malls in one giant building.

Lee: (stoic) It's the Mall of the Dead.

Su: Dead Mall, Dead Mall, yyyaaaaaaaayyyyyyyy!!!

Lee: Calm down Su.

Su: (jumps on Lee's back, but he was unphased) Do they have food, yummy, yummy food?

Lee: Yes.

Su: Woohoo!

Lee: Let's go in. I have to tell you all a few things (phases into the building).

Motoko: I hope this isn't one of those pranks of his (walks through the automatic doors and everyone else followed suit).

(Inside the building)

(Everyone minus Lee is looking at size of the building from inside)

Kitsune: THIS PLACE IS HUGE (echoes)!!!

Motoko: (on edge) Lee, is this another prank?

Lee: Tama is behind you.

Tama: Myuh!

Motoko: Ack! Get away from me!

Lee: Time for another "Long-Ass Explanation".

Sarah: Please hurry before Motoko tears down the place.

Lee: If she does then all of the dead customers will kill her.

Keitaro: Can we get free stuff here?

Lee: Yes, I'm the co-executive of the Realm of the Dead so my friends and myself get free shit every time I come here, which isn't often.

Keitaro: So can we split up and grab stuff?

Lee: Yeah, but don't under any circumstances open the purple door!

Shinobu: Why is that?

Lee: There are some hot chicks in there that know me, they know who you all are and they'll...do things to you (trying to scare them).

Kitsune: With that settled, let's split up.

Lee: I have something to take care of...Sarah I need your help for this one.

Sarah: Cool (she leaves with Lee).

Kitsune: Let's go Motoko.

Motoko: Y-yeah. I don't care where I go as long as I'm away from that turtle. (Leaves with Kitsune)

Su: (grabs Shinobu) C'mon Shinobu, let's go, let's go!

Shinobu: Su, Su wait a minute (Su took off on a motor scooter while taking Shinobu with her).

Keitaro: Let's go Naru (starts to take a route).

Naru: Hey wait up (follows him)!

Tama: Myuh (flies after them)!

(At the Beer and Swords section)

Kitsune: Oh cool, booze (grabs a big bag and grabs free beer)!!

Motoko: That's ridiculous Kitsune.

Kitsune: Who cares, we get free stuff just for knowing Lee!

Motoko: You're a pistol. (sees medieval weaponry) Oh cool, swords, swords, and more swords (makes a creepy happy face)!!!

(Elsewhere in the Mall)

Su: Yeah, yeah, look at all the high-tech weaponry!

Shinobu: Uh, Su?

Su: What?

Shinobu: (points to a sign) Look at this.

Su: (reads the sign) Why does it say "Beware of Lee" on it (turns around and sees a robot with a letter)? Oh, thank you (reads the letter).

Dear Su,

You're too slow, by the time you read this I will have already taken all of the high-tech machinery.

Catch ya later byatch,

Lee

Su: What (finds all of the stuff gone and graffiti that says "Lee was here.")? NNNNOOOOOOOO!!!

(Near a football stadium)

Sarah: Did you hear something right about now?

Lee: Yeah, it was Su crying because I took all of the high-tech crap.

Sarah: By the way, what did you do with all that stuff anyway?

Lee: I put it all in a dimensional pocket that leads to Keitaro's room.

Sarah: Really?

Lee: No, it's all in the Armory.

Sarah: Won't Su find it?

Lee: Most likely...we're here.

Sarah: (sees a silver door) What's beyond this point?

Lee: A Football Stadium.

Sarah: Your errand is a football game?

Lee: It's a short game...after that we can get more free stuff.

Sarah: Okay (they both walk into the stadium and the door closes).

(Meanwhile)

(Keitaro, Naru and Tama have been throughout the Mall. Keitaro was grabbing porno and school supplies, Naru was grabbing school supplies and underwear and Tama was stocking up on turtle stuff. Eventually they came across the infamous purple door.)

Keitaro: Look at this Naru, it's that door Lee mentioned.

Naru: Let's check it out.

Keitaro: But Lee said...

Naru: I have learned one thing and that is to never take Lee seriously in these type of situations.

Keitaro: But...

Naru: He might be hiding something that's very valuable and he doesn't want to share it with us.

Keitaro: You really think so?

Naru: (getting cocky) I know so.

Keitaro: But what about the creatures Lee warned us about that are behind that door?

Naru: C'mon Keitaro, man up for once in your life (opens the door and walks inside).

Keitaro: I'm gonna hate this. Naru wait up (chases after Naru)!

Tama: (waves good-bye) Myuh (flies away).

L.I.T.: Now you know those two never really listen to my warnings. In fact only Shinobu, Su, Sarah, Haruka, Seta and Kitsune (whenever she's sober) takes my warnings seriously. That's why I have six cards explaining the six scenarios that Keitaro and Naru will be experiencing (holds up a card that says "#1 Meeting the Creatures aka Female Jabberwockies".)

(Inside the room)

Naru: Well Keitaro are you scared of the big dark room?

Keitaro: (stoic) You jumped when the door closed.

Naru: So did you.

Keitaro: But I didn't scream.

Naru: WHO ASKED YOU (Hears feminine laughter echoing throughout the room)!?!

Keitaro: What was that?

Naru: I don't know...AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!! Keitaro look!!

Keitaro: What is it OH MY GOD (sees two pairs of eyes, one pair glowing red and another pair glowing green)!!!

Naru: Ummm, is there a light switch in here (the lights come on and the creatures were revealed to be two 12' naked women with long hair and demon like wings)?

Red Haired Green Eyed Lady: Hello, I'm Lynn.

Green Haired Red Eyed Lady: How do you do I'm Launa.

Naru: Um, what are you two?

Lynn & Launa: We're Jabberwockies!!

L.I.T.: (Holds another reading "#2 Communicating with the Jabberwockies.)

Keitaro: Are you two the creatures Lee warned us about?

Lynn: (excited) Lee mentioned us?

Launa: (equally ecstatic) Alright (Both hopped up and down like giddy school girls)!

Keitaro: (stares at the twin's big breasts) So big and bouncy.

Naru: Grrrr! You per...

Launa: (stops Naru) Hey, don't hit him because he was staring at us.

Lynn: We like it.

L.I.T.: (holds another card reading "#3 Letting the creatures grope you")

Lynn: So Keitaro, do you like what you see (advances towards Keitaro while on her hands and knees)?

Launa: How about you Naru (mimics Lynn's movements)?

Keitaro & Naru: (nervous) Uhhhh, how do you know our names?

Launa: We constantly watch Lee so we know about him and you two (gropes Naru).

Lynn: C'mon Keitaro take me (follows suit, while Keitaro has a nosebleed so major even I question the fact he's still being alive).

L.I.T.: Here is the fourth scenario (holds another card that reads "Escape").

Keitaro & Naru: (Hauling ass) AAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!

L.I.T.: Ha ha, that was funny, here is the fifth scenario (holds another card reading #5 Get the hell out of the room because the twins won't leave the room, meaning you're home-free).

(Keitaro and Naru exit the room and close the door)

Keitaro: I can't (huff) believe (huff) we almost got...

Naru: (Freaked) Don't even finish that sentence (a light colored fist smashes through the door)!

L.I.T.: Usually, after scenario five it's over, but in this case the twins were obviously too horny to care about anything else. This is what the sixth and final scenario is for (holds the final card reading "#6 If you have gotten this far it means that Lynn and Launa must really have it out for you. My advice is RUN FOR THE SAKE OF YOUR CHASTITY!!!).

Keitaro & Naru: (Running like hell) Shouldn't you two be chasing Lee, doing each other or something else disgusting?!

Lynn: We would...

Launa: But he is too hard to catch.

Lynn: So we are chasing you two isn't that great?

Keitaro: I don't think I will be able to control myself for much longer.

Naru: If this keeps up I might lose control.

(Interrupt fic)

Sarah: Why are you interrupting the fic this time?

Lee3: I need to give a profile on Lynn and Launa.

Sarah: (whines) But why?

Lee3: So the readers can understand the characters, like I did with Lobo.

Sarah: Just hurry, we're almost at the good parts.

Lee3: Whiny bitch. Lynn is the older twin by 10 seconds, she is 50 years old, but her aging stopped at 18. Why she is infatuated with Lee? Well, the only information was something about a ritual, only Launa a few others of her kind and Lynn herself knows why.

Launa is the younger twin her age is 50, but for some reason her aging stopped two years later than Lynn's. Even though there wasn't a difference between her looks and her sister's, Lynn still rags on her about it. When Lynn leads Launa follows. As you can see they finish each other's sentences. They're half mortal so their aging may stop, but they can still die. The reason why they rarely leave the Purple Door is because they can be vain at times even though they are really hot and have nothing to worry about appearance wise.

Sarah: That was lengthy.

Lee3: True, but chances are the readers may not read that part.

Sarah: (annoyed) Then why did you put it in?

Lee3: So it is there if the readers want to more about my characters.

Sarah: Can we finish this chapter now?

Lee3: Yes...LET'S CONTINUE!!!

(At the football stadium)

Sarah: Well Lee, we're in a football stadium, filled with a crowd of your enemies that you and your friends killed, and worst of all we're participating in a football game with no rules against...which team are playing again?

Lee: Team Doomsday (an explosion occurs in front of them). Here they are (the dust clears and the team is revealed).

Sarah: (face-faults) That's the team?!

Lee: (nonchalant) Yep.

Sarah: Look at them! One of them is a big muscular guy with spikes on his arms and a skull for a head!

Lee: (Stoic) Skull Head.

Sarah: One is a dragon!

Lee: Drago.

Sarah: Another is a Werewolf!

Lee: He's not a Were-anything. He's an artificially created Jackal with human characteristics. His name is Jackal.

Sarah: The last two look like they really hate us!

Lee: That's Renegade and his little psychotic sister Angelica. They have been dead for...over a week now.

Sarah: What killed them?

Renegade: (points at Lee) You're friends, Lee and that Indian girl!

Lee: Kaolla Su is not from India, dude.

Renegade: (pissed) Who cares, it doesn't change the fact that we're gonna kill your asses!

Lee: Good luck trying asshole.

Jackal: (annoyed) Can we hurry up and play already? I wanna get back in time to watch "Spongebob Squarepants".

Skull Head: (excited) I got the ball (holds a glowing football). NOW LET'S PLAY!!!

Angelica: You receive.

Lee: Fine (looks at Sarah).

Sarah: Don't tell me you want me to block someone.

Lee: No I don't want you to do that.

Sarah: Phew.

Lee: I want you to return the kick (Sarah falls over).

(Interrupt fic)

Sarah: (whines) Not again!

Lee3: These are the last profiles and they will be short.

Sarah: As long as they're short.

Lee3: Skull Head is 60 years old (aging stopped at fifty when he died). Easily excited and psychotic, but unlike Angelica he can calm down. Ten years ago he attacked Lee's friends, fought Lee and was shot in the head by a laser Lee fired. Lee still has Skull Head's bludgeon. Drago loves to eat, but he despises Lee with a passion, even though he rarely shows it. Eight years ago Lee raided his base, which was booby-trapped. Unfortunately Drago is pretty stupid and impatient at times. So he left his main chamber headed towards Lee and was destroyed by his own traps. Drago is 17 years old, but is 200 years old in human years.

Jackal's age is estimated at 25 years, but only his creator knows his true age and he died of a Heart Attack minutes after Jackal was created. He is a Mercenary and he attacked Lee three years ago because someone hired him to. After Jackal failed his mission Renegade XII who is the older brother of Renegade and Angelica killed him. He would exact his revenge on Renegade XIII, but his constant composure annoys Renegade a lot.

Renegade XIII and Angelica founded Team Doomsday two days after Lee and Su killed them. They are all out for revenge basically.

Sarah: You call that short?!

Lee3: Shut up you little brat! LET'S CONTINUE WITH THE CHAPTER!!!

Renegade: Okay, let's go (kicks the ball)!

Lee: (pulls out his sword and morphs it into a big laser gun) It's a high one Sarah!!!

Sarah: (catches the ball and runs at the defenders) Lee, you better do something.

Lee: This will be funny as hell (changes his sword into a laser gun and shoots the defenders).

Team Doomsday: (falls to the ground in pain) You asshole, we'll kill you!

Lee: Oh, poor babies. I would say I'm sorry, but we're about to score.

Renegade: Say what (turns his head to see Sarah score a touchdown)? Dammit!

(40 seconds later)

Lee: Okay Sarah, get that ball ready.

Sarah: You just better make that extra point.

Angelica: Y'all better block that kick.

Jackal: (stoic) Shut up bitch.

Sarah: HIKE (makes the hold and Lee makes the kick, which bounced of Skull Head's skull and the kick is still good)!!!

Lee: Yes, let's get ready for kickoff.

Sarah: Yeah (Both of them ran to their forty yard line)!

Angelica: What was that?!

Skull Head: Set back.

Angelica: Oh, because it looked like A FOOTBALL BOUNCING OFF YOUR FUCKING HEAD AND THROUGH THE GOAL POST MAKING THE KICK GOOD!!!!

Drago: Hey, shut up bitch.

Angelica: Well that's the first time I've ever heard you say something THAT WASN"T FOOD RELATED!!!!

Drago: (punches Angelica in the face) Ass-munch.

(Kickoff)

Sarah: Time to kick!

Lee: Booya (runs and kicks the football)!!

Jackal: It's a high one.

Drago: I got it (flies up and catches the ball)! I got it (Lee tackles him and he fumbles the ball)!

Skull Head: (Picks up the ball) I got it!

Sarah: (steals the ball from Skull Head) No, I got it (Angelica tackles Sarah and takes the ball).

Angelica: In your dreams bitch (get clotheslined by Lee).

Lee: You suck (gets speared by Renegade)!

Renegade: Kiss my ass (Sarah kicks him in the nuts). Goddamn (drops the bal and holds his crotch)!

Sarah: Kiss your own ass (gets mauled by Jackal)! AAAAAHHHHH, HELP!

Jackal: (stoic) We're gonna score.

Lee: (hits Jackal in the face with a bat and runs the ball) See ya fuck nuts (ten seconds later Lee scores)! Since everyone is almost unconscious I'll just kick the extra point (does it).

(Kickoff)

Lee: Ready to kick Sarah?

Sarah: Yeah!

Lee: Let's do it (Sarah kicks the ball, while Lee charges at the blockers)!

Jackal: Here it comes.

Skull Head: Renegade, why did you put sister back there as one of the two receivers?

Renegade: I don't know, just make sure Lee doesn't get through!

Skull Head: I can see the obviousness of this plan. Since she SUCKS!!!

Angelica: (catches the ball) I got it!

Renegade: Here he comes!

Lee: Splits into four.

Skull Head: Get 'em (three of the copies were tackled and disappeared shortly after)!

Jackal: Shit, were is the real one?!

Lee: JACKASS!!!

Renegade: (sees Lee heading for Angelica) Dammit, he's gonna takedown Angelica before she even makes it to the forty-yard line!

Lee: I got you now!

Angelica: OH NO!

Lee: Yes (gets speared by Drago)! No (groans)!

Jackal: Protect Angelica (Renegade, Jackal and Skull Head form a line in front of Angelica and charges at Sarah while Drago lags behind.).

Sarah: Dammit, gotta think fast. (Sarah tries to slide under Renegade, but the bounty hunter kicked her in the face sending her flying twenty feet. Then when she landed, she got trampled by a pair of boots, three pairs of basketball shoes and pair of purple high heels.) Dammit Lee where are you?

Lee: (still on Team Doomsday's 20 yard line holding his stomach) I'm gonna blast your asses (gets up and fires an energy blast at Drago).

Sarah: (watches the blast pass over her) Heh,heh,heh, they're in trouble now.

Drago: (sees the energy blast head for the group) Damn, we only have 30 yards to go. (Stops to block the attack, but it was too powerful) OH NOOOOOOOOOO (the energy explodes)!!!

Angelica: Drago!

Skull Head: Don't worry about him we're about to score (20 seconds later, they scored)!

(The Home side of the crowd starts cheering, Lee teleports to the 40-yard line to help Sarah who was struggling to get up.)

Lee: You okay Sarah (helps her up)?

Sarah: I got kicked, ran over and trampled so of course I'm not okay! What happened?

Lee: Team Doomsday just scored.

Sarah: So they score is now 6 to 14.

Lee: They won't score another point. C'mon I have a plan.

Sarah: Cool, let's get ready to block that kick.

(One minute later)

Renegade: Time to kick it.

Jackal: Hike (Drago hikes the ball, Jackal sets the ball to be kicked, Renegade kicks the ball, but Lee was already in the air and blocked the kick...with his crotch.)!

All the Fans: Daaaaaaaaaaammmmmmmmmn!

Sarah: (caught the ball) I got it. (takes off while Team Doomsday was laughing their asses off.)

Skull Head: That is some funny shit!

Angelica: That is what I have always wanted to see!

Jackal: (laughing) Something is not right here...but I don't give a fuck!

(Lee is struggling to get up, but instead he starts laughing.)

Renegade: What is so funny?

Lee: While you five dumbasses are laughing at me, Sarah is about to score again.

Team Doomsday: WHAT (Looks behind them to see Sarah at the far 30 yard line)?!

Angelica: TAICHIBANA!!!

(A/N: I think that's Japanese for "Tear the bitch apart". I might have to watch "Kill Bill" and look at the subtext closely again.)

Renegade: CHARGE (They all try to chase Sarah, but they got blasted by Lee)!!!!

Lee: Forget someone? YOU'RE CLEAR SARAH!!!

Sarah: Thanks (scores)!

Lee: Morons (flips off Team Doomsday and teleports to the end zone).

Sarah: Way to take one for the team!

Lee: Thanks, though my balls still hurt, but I got another plan that will fool those idiots.

(Extra point attempt)

Renegade: He's gonna kick it!

Lee: Hike (Sarah holds the ball)!

Renegade: (waits until Lee is close to the ball) NOW (the whole team jumps, but Lee grabbed the ball, ran under the five shit-heads, and scored two points at the buzzer)!!!

Lee: Two-point conversion!

Sarah: Now the score is 22 to 6 jackasses!

Announcer: That's the half, the score is Team Doomsday: 6, Lee and Sarah: 22.

(Both teams head to their own Break Rooms.)

Lee: All we have to do is score a couple more times and the game is over.

Sarah: Let me guess, first to 36 points?

Lee: Yep.

(Team Doomsday's Break Room)

Renegade: I can't believe I let my frustration get the best of me, allowing me to fall for that trick.

Angelica: (seductive) Don't be sad big brother, everyone gets frustrated at some point because it's an emotion...like love (puts her hand down his pants).

Renegade: GET YOUR HAND OUT OF THERE (Angelica quickly obeys and blushes)!!!!

Skull Head: That girl ain't right.

Jackal: Saw that coming.

Drago: I'm hungry.

Skull Head: (annoyed) Your big-ass is always hungry!

(Somewhere else inside the mall)

Shinobu: Hey Su look at this (sees a door that says Mekanos on it)

Su: Cool, let's go in!

Shinobu: That's not a good idea...Su?

Su: (already in the room) Oh wow it's full of all those high-tech weapons Lee took!

Shinobu: Su, let's just get out of here.

Su: (packed the weapons in a big bag while giggling) Weapons, weapons, weapons. Weapons of mass destruction (giggles)!

Shinobu: Now what are you doing?!

Su: (spray paints "Su was here" all over the walls, floor and ceiling) Payback. I guess the so-called "Pranksta Gangsta" finally screwed up!

Shinobu: Su, let's...(Su grabs the loot and Shinobu and leaves)

(Elsewhere)

Naru: Where are the Jabberwockies?

Keitaro: I don't know, I thought they were behind us.

Naru: I guess after an hour of running we finally lost them.

Launa: (from above) Guess again.

Lynn: (phased through the floor) We want you two to pleasure us.

Naru & Keitaro: NOWAY (flees)!!!

Lynn: If you run...

Launa: ...it will only entice us to chase you!

(A.N.: Motoko and Kitsune are drunk as hell so I'm just going back to Lee and Sarah who are stepping onto the field now.)

Sarah: So that's Operation Landmine?

Lee: Yeah, but we are going to execute it if were on offense.

Skull Head: Hey shit-head, you got a coin?

Lee: Yeah. You faceless fuckhole.

Renegade: I call heads!

Lee: (annoyed) I haven't flipped the coin yet (flips the coin).

Sarah: Call it.

Renegade: HEADS!!!

(The coin lands on Lee's hand)

Skull Head: What's the result?

Lee: (punches Skull Head in...what he calls a face) Heads, you losers wanna kick or receive?

Drago: Receive.

Lee: Fine.

Sarah: So much for Operation Landmine. Lee did you use a two sided coin?

Lee: I've never owned one.

Jackal: Drago, don't eat the ball when you catch it okay?

Drago: I'll try.

Jackal: Don't try...DO IT!!!

(Kickoff)

(Sarah kicks the ball, Drago caught it, a few seconds later he got tackled by Lee.)

Angelica: (quizzical) Big brother did you see him tackle Drago?

Renegade: No.

Jackal: Even with my advanced hearing and sight all I could do was hear him, nothing else.

Sarah: Nice tackle.

Lee: I just want to end this game quickly.

(First down)

Renegade: Hike!

(Five seconds later)

Lee: Too slow (uses super speed to ram Renegade so hard he flew into his own end zone).

Sarah: Yay, free safety! That means we have 26 points.

Drago: SHUT UP (Hit Sarah in the head, knocking her out)!!!

(Kickoff)

Lee: Here we go (kicks the ball)!

Jackal: (Caught it) Let's go (starts running)!

Sarah: Ready the torpedo Captain!

Lee: (engulfs Sarah into his tail) Torpedo loaded.

Jackal: Behold, my speed (starts running super fast).

Lee: (positions his tail like that of a scorpion) Sarah Torpedo...LAUNCH (fires Sarah out of his tail)!!!

Jackal: He fired her at a speed of Mach 2! (Jumps over Sarah) You missed moron (gets hit by the Sonic boom and is sent flying back to the 5 yard line and the rest of the team...fell on him) GET OFF ME YOU FAT-ASS!!!

Angelica: I'M NOT FAT!!!

Jackal: I MEANT DRAGO DUMBASS!!!

Sarah: (still flying) Woohoo we stopped the play (flies into the scoreboard and gets electrocuted)! Ouch.

Lee: Well, at least she's not dead.

(First down)

Angelica: Hike (Throws the ball, Skull Head is about to catch it, but Lee jumps in the way to intercept the ball, the ball bounces off Lee's head, Sarah catches it and runs about 5yards before getting tackled by Angelica.)!

Lee: Nice job Sarah.

Sarah: Should we try it now?

Lee: Fine, but remember I won't be around for the kickoff.

(First down)

Renegade: What the hell are they doing?

Jackal: They appear to be at the other end of the field.

Renegade: I can see that Jackal, but the line of scrimmage is on our goal line. What they are doing is unorthodoxed just like this very fic itself.

Sarah: Hike (Lee hikes the ball to Sarah and charges at Team Doomsday, but stops halfway falls to the ground)!

Skull Head: Heh, heh, heh, he's spent (The evil team charged at Sarah, but when Renegade stepped on Lee, he exploded and Team Doomsday went flying in all directions like in Matrix Reloaded.)!

Jackal: (While flying) So that was Lee's plan.

Renegade: (annoyed) A little late don't you think?

(Sarah ran until she scored a touchdown.)

(Attempting the extra point)

Sarah: Lee wasn't kidding when he mentioned about his rejuvenation taking time. (Hikes the ball, and attempts a two point conversion and barely makes it.)

(A/N: Which is worse, Team Doomsday failing to prevent Sarah from making the two point conversion or failing to get the first down when it's "Fourth and One"?)

(Kickoff)

Renegade: Dammit, all they have to do now is kick a field goal.

Jackal: Relax, Lee need time to reform, we're on offense, and to top it all off, that little girl is lucky she can even stand on her own two feet let alone kick the ball.

(Sarah miraculously kicks the ball near the end zone, Angelica catches it and Sarah gets run over again and the evil bastards scored.)

(One minute later)

Jackal: (attempts the extra point) C'mon (Lee appears out of nowhere and catches the ball). WHAT?!

Lee: FLARE STAR (A bright flash of light blinds the evil punks and a fiery rock fell from the sky and exploded sending Team Doomsday flying. Lee was carrying the ball and Sarah while running until he scored.)!!!

Sarah: Yeah! We won!

Lee: Oh yeah, 40 to 12 baby (gets blasted in the back) OW!!

Renegade: You bastards!

Sarah: Awe, are you pissed because you lost?

Renegade: UUUUUURRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!

Jackal: (stoic) Let it go.

Angelica: Why should we let it go (gets sucker punched by a fan)?!

Drago: That's why (two minutes later a riot broke out between Lee and Sarah's fans and Team Doomsday's fans with Team Doomsday in the middle of it. Lee and Sarah on the other hand left right before the riot broke out.).

(Back at the Mall of the Dead)

Sarah: That was fun.

Lee: Are you sure you're okay? You did get trampled twice.

Sarah: I'm sure.

Lee: Good thing none of her bones were broken.

Sarah: Where to next?

Lee: The high-tech armory I mentioned earlier. I need to pick up some high-tech stuff, remember?

Sarah: Yeah, let's go!

L.I.T.: Boy won't they be in for a big surprise. Anyway, it will be a little while before they get there and Motoko and Kitsune are staggering to the entrance while knocking things over so we're gonna fast forward to Keitaro and Naru, who are still on the run from the twins.

(Elsewhere)

Naru: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Keitaro: (Stops to save Naru who is struggling to get free from the Lynn and Launa's grasp) LET HER GO (punches Lynn and kicks Launa sending them both flying into a wall)!!! Let's go Naru!

Naru: Right (both of them make their getaway)!

L.I.T.: Damn, didn't think he had it in him. I guess he can fight when he wants to...(snickers) yeah right, that was a one-time thing and you readers know it (starts laughing)!

(Inside Mekanos)

Sarah: (smirks) Looks like Su cleaned you out.

Lee: Yeah well the joke is still on her.

Sarah: Why (Lee opens an underground door revealing upgraded versions of the weapons Lee took and Kaolla stole.)?

Lee: That's why (Lee took the weapons and he and Sarah left the armory). Hey, you want any candy?

Sarah: Yeah!

Lee: Cool, there's a vending machine next to the armory (they walk to the machine).

Sarah: This says we need a Dead Dollar for a bag of candy. What's a Dead Dollar?

Lee: That's the monetary unit for the Realm of the Dead and the same thing applies here (Side-kicks the machine and all sorts of candy came out).

Sarah: Nice trick.

Lee: Thanks, let's load up and head back to the entrance.

Sarah: Okay (Sarah gets a giant bag and stocked up on the candy, while Lee put a "I cleaned out this one", sign on the machine.).

(30 minutes later at the entrance)

Su: Woohoo we're ready to go!

Shinobu: F-finally back at the entrance (faints).

Lee: Great, you two are here.

Su: (giggles) Yep, I got a whole lot of weapons and machine parts.

Lee: (smirks) So did I.

Shinobu: (wakes up) I...got...candy materials.

Sarah: Anything else?

Shinobu: Well um...

Su: Underwear, underwear, panties, bras, you name it!!!

Sarah: (whispers to Lee) I can picture Su a lesbian.

Lee: (whispers back) I'm thinking bisexual.

(Kitsune and Motoko stagger in drunk as hell.)

Kitsune: (barely standing) The booze here is great.

Lee: Thanks, most of it is either American or German.

Motoko: I got some great swords as well as other weapons.

Sarah: No shit. Hey, where are the Spaz and the Tits?

Lee: Wait for it.

(Keitaro and Naru come running.)

Keitaro: I can't believe I kicked her.

Naru: Thanks, for saving me.

Keitaro: You're welcome.

Lee: Get moving guys. I'll be right behind you.

All: Okay (everyone made a hasty exit with their stuff right before Lynn and Launa made an appearance).

Launa: OH MY GOD!!!

Lynn: IT'S YOU!!!

Lee: If you are looking for Keitaro and Naru they just left the mall.

Launa & Lynn: (frowns) Awwwwwww!

Lee: Heh, heh, heh, too bad, now you can't...(Lynn rubs her breast against the back of Lee's head.) AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH (Launa shoved his face in between hers and Lynn pressed her breasts against her younger sister's...I guess to prevent escape)!!!

Lynn: At least we can hold and caress you.

Launa: Lynn, weren't going to do that to begin with?

Lynn: Oh yeah.

Lee: (muffled) This is very nice, but I gotta get outta here.

Launa: Big sister, I think a part of him just had a growth spurt!

Lynn: I think so (Lee electrocutes them both) AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!

Lee: (escapes the grounded sisters) Now I know how Keitaro feels when Kitsune messes with his mind (leaves).

L.I.T.: Hey, what are you doing you moron! You were in ecstasy just now (light bulb burns out)! Awe, now I have change the light bulb in the dark!

(Back at Hinata House)

Lee: (comes through the portal, which shortly disappears) Whew.

Naru: Thanks.

Keitaro: Yeah, you saved our chastities.

Lee: Keitaro, you would have lost control in 2 minutes after they caught you.

Naru: How long would you last in their grasp?

Lee: A month.

Keitaro: (sarcastic) That's self-control.

Lee: Better than you shit-head.

L.I.T.: There ends another day of misadventure at the Hinata House...wait a minute.

(Naru's room explodes and she goes flying all the to Hokkaido.)

Naru: Lee, I swear, I will KILL YOU!!!!

L.I.T.: Now it's a complete day (turns off the light bulb that was just changed).

To Be Continued

Antics: Almost Over

Keitaro: So, it's almost over.

Lee: Yeah, but we got three more chapters to go.

Sarah: So far this chapter was my favorite!

Kitsune: That's because you got a decent role in this chapter.

Sarah: Well it's not like the author wanted to write about you being drunk off your ass.

Su: YOU FOUND UPGRADED VERSIONS OF THE WEAPONS I JACKED FROM YOU?!

Lee: Exactly psycho-girl.

Su: WWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!

Lee: Su can cry?

Keitaro: That is odd.

Naru & Motoko: You made Su cry you bas...(gets blasted by Lee)!

Lee: Shut the fuck up!

Kitsune: (laughs) I'll never give tired of that.

Motoko: I bet you won't.

Sarah: What happened to Team Doomsday?

Lee: L-cam 5 (An advanced floating camera appeared)! Show the footage.

(L-cam 5 played out the whole riot)

Naru: All that over a game?

Lee: Most of those dead fools want me dead.

Sarah: (sees something disturbing) Look at this.

Lee: Oh my god...ANGELICA IS FUCKING HER BROTHER!!!

Keitaro: Cover the eyes of the youth!

Lee: Renegade is not even conscious!!!

Motoko: TURN IT OFF!!!

Lee: (shuts it off) Oh my freakin' god.

Kitsune: She has got to be horny.

Lee: (pissed off) I really hate that girl!

Su & Mutsumi: What will do kill her?

Lee: I already did that!

Keitaro: Their gonna have some screwed up kids.

Lee: They have to be alive for that!

Naru: (smiling) Are you sure?

Lee: (makes a face that caused everybody to run) DOES THIS LOOK LIKE I'M UNSURE?!

(Everyone runs)

Lee: (smiles) That got rid of them. Now I can watch Excel-Saga...play it L-cam.

(L-cam complies)

Lee3: Well, that's it 12 chapters down 3 to go. That last Antics was a bit out there. Maybe it was because this one actually has something to do with the story or it could be that I was watching "Fight Club" for the first time while typing the Antics portion of this chapter. Anyway, review if you want to. I start college as a junior next week so updating might be tough, but then again the next three chapters are short. See ya next time.