Hi! It's been a bit of a while. I realised I didn't have a disclaimer:

I own nothing. Except some stuff, but no stuff that's already been owned. My sister owns the rest of the story, she told me about a weird dream she had and I thought it'd be cool =)

Reviews:

LJFan: Argh! Totally never thought of that Alicia Quidditch chick. Thanks!

Swimmerkitti: I said to my friends that I was told I had a 'seriously funny mind' and they're like "Booply." Cos we were playing this game where we weren't allowed to say any proper words. ('Booply' means 'you lose'. I said proper words.) But I was still proud of myself =)

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Alicia looked around. Steel walls lined the small room. Another Ministry technique. Get you reeeeeeeeeeally bored, and I mean REAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLY bored, then you tell anything just to get an X-box in there. But Alicia was determined. She was not going to crack.

"How did I end up here…" She muttered, putting her face in her hands.

Actually, she knew how she ended up there. The ministry officials had examined the scene of Oliver Wood's murder, and found bloody handprints everywhere. They matched Alicia's. She changed her name from Alicia to Tiffany, went to the ministry, and had been sitting in that cold, dark room ever since. She was bored out of her brain. Nothing to do. Nooooooooooothing. Not a sausage.

"Are you ready to admit, Miss Herpes?" A man said, walking in. Tiffany stared.

"Don't call me Herpes." She said. "Just cos I have it doesn't mean I am it."

"Answer the question, Tiffany." He said. "Admit it! Admit you killed those students!"

"I admit." Tiffany said, her conscience clouding reasonable thought. "I killed them all."

The man looked surprised. Then he froze. Tiffany cautiously got up from her seat. The man stared at her empty chair. She waved her hands in front of his face. Nothing. She giggled, and twisted him into an embarrassing position. He didn't stir. She cruised into the main area. Everyone was frozen, except one man. Dumbledore.

"Dumbles!" She said. "What a pleasant surprise!"

He looked at her very seriously. "You are being MiNd CoNtRoLlEd. To release it, you must deliver a special item to Witchdoctor Sharap'n, deep in the jungles of Africa."

Tiffany was full of questions. "Who is Witchdoctor Sharap'n? What item? Do I get a map? Why were you talking in that sTrAnGe CaPiTaLiSaTiOn?"

But Dumbledore disappeared, leaving a piece of parchment with three words on it. 'Seek the skeleton'.

"I will seek the skeleton." She said, before walking straight past the frozen minister for magic, out of the building.

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"I need to go alone." Tiffany said, pulling on a loose jacket.

"You're not going alone. I'm going with you."

"No!"

Ron entered the scene. "Who's going where, and I want to come too."

"Oh, bugger off." Tiffany said, trying to convince Harry to not accompany her to Africa. She exited, with no bags.

"Won't you need luggage?"

"It'll slow me down."

"Come on, you're being crazy -"

"Me? Crazy? I have to go to Africa, because Dumbledore told me to when he froze the workers at the ministry of magic, and because he'll stop me killing people. I have to seek out the skeleton, and deliver an unknown item to Witchdoctor Sharap'n. It is VERY SIMPLE. Now who's the crazy one?" She raised her eyebrows knowingly.

"Still you, babe." Ginny said, smiling. "I'm going too. Always wanted to see Africa."

"Fine, I don't care. All you can come."

"Even me?" McGonagall said, coming into the room from the wardrobe.

"Where'd you come from?" Tiffany asked suspiciously.

"Narnia." She said simply.

"Alright, so it's me, Harry, Ginny, Ron, and McGonagall. Let's go."

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They boarded the next plane to Africa, not knowing where they would go after that. Jump the first hurdle: getting into the correct continent. From then on, they were winging it. They passed their fake boarding passes to the airhostess, and she let them pass without a backward glance. They boarded the plane, seeing none other than…

"Butterfly!" Tiffany greeted as they boarded. "What happened to you? The author hasn't written about you for a while - I mean, I haven't seen you for a while!"

"I've been moonlighting, darl." She said. "Professor by day, airhostess by night. I should be a spy or something."

Tiffany nodded and led the group to their seats, knocking out the people who had the real boarding passes, and dragging them into the bathrooms, much to the horror of the other passengers. They sat down, and Tiffany put her head back against the seat.

"Where to from Africa?" Ginny asked.

"We search." Tiffany said simply, drifting off to sleep.

She was walking through a lush jungle, wearing a tattered green skirt and tank top. She had no shoes on but didn't seem to notice the stones pressing against the soles of her feet. All of a sudden, birds started flying at her. She screamed and ducked, but they hit her in the face, slapping her with their papery - papery? They weren't birds. They were bits of parchment. She caught one, but a skull snatched it away from her, and the parchment dropped to the ground.

"Don't deliver it." The skull said. "Sharap'n is an irritable witchdoctor who hates being awoken. Better to kill. Better to maim. Better to hurt others than to walk into death's arms and be hurt yourself."

"Oh, quit ya bitchin'." Tiffany said, and punched the skull. As soon as the skull made contact with the ground, Tiffany awoke as they touched down in Africa.

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Haha, there's the first part of my sister's weird dream. Stay tuned for the rest!