Disclaimer: None of these characters belong to me.

A/N: My friend and I have a joke about Arthur, so I thought it would be funny to see what happens to the kids in a few years, so here it is.

When Arthur rang the doorbell to the Crosswire mansion, his hand was trembling. He had known Muffy since the 2nd grade, but now here he was at the ripe old age of thirteen, he was ready to experience the beauty of Muffy Crosswire. The door swung open, and one of her servants came to the door.

"Ms. Crosswire is waiting for you in her room," he replied, as he had to the dozens of other youngsters who had come to the house. Arthur nodded, and gulped, clutching the brown paper bag filled with Trojans Super Pleasure condoms he bought at the corner store. The walk up the grand staircase was one of the longest Arthur had ever made. He was finally completing his journey into manhood. This morning he had been eating his frosted cereal and watching Bionic Bunny, this afternoon he would become Bionic Bunny, sort of. When Arthur finally pushed the door to her room open, he was almost in tears.

"I've been waiting for you Arthur," Muffy cooed from her bed. Arthur took one last breath, and entered the room. "Place the money on the table," She whispered, and Arthur put the $5 bill on the dresser.

"There goes my new comic book," he mumbled to himself. He turned and looked at Muffy who was sprawled on the bed, wearing nothing but black lingerie. Arthur flinched slightly at the sight of half-naked Muffy. It wasn't that Muffy was unappealing to the eye, but Arthur had this issue with underwear.

Muffy sensed Arthur's panic about the underwear, since he had been paranoid about underwear since the 3rd grade. "Arthur," Muffy scolded, "you really need to get over that underwear thing."

Arthur turned three different shades of red, and Muffy rubbed the bed space beside her. Arthur gulped again, and headed over to her.

"Don't be nervous," Muffy mumbled, and kissed him on the neck. Arthur started to sweat, and he though he was going to throw up. Muffy began to pull off his yellow knit sweater, and Arthur almost burst into tears for the second time this afternoon.

"Just relax, and let me handle everything," Muffy cooed, and continued to undress the aardvark. Arthur lay there on the silk bedspread, like a dead pig, and waited for Muffy to make him a man. That was not going to be so easy though. Suddenly Muffy stopped, and looked up at Arthur, raising an eyebrow.

"Well, Well," Muffy teased, "Apparently little Arthur is a wee bit scared too." Arthur thought he was going to cry; no one said there was going to be work involved. "Maybe we can help him out," Muffy assured Arthur. Suddenly Arthur's eyes grew wide, as Muffy hand grabbed something that had never been touched before. She stroked Arthur tenderly, but he hung there like a dead garden snake.

Muffy began to get frustrated with Arthur, and began to smack his snake left, and right. Arthur burst into tears. Muffy sighed and got up, pulling on a black silk robe. She headed over to where Arthur's clothes lay, and threw his pants at him.

"God Arthur, you are such a baby," Muffy exclaimed, "You can't handle this, and you are taking to long. Buster is going to be here in ten minutes. Get Out!" Arthur wiped the tears from his eyes, and wriggled back into his clothes, avoiding eye contact with Muffy. Once he was dressed, Muffy ushered him out the door, and threw the bag of condoms back at him. "Super pleasure my ass, Arthur!" Muffy shouted, and slammed the door shut, leaving Arthur standing defeated outside.

Arthur slowly began to drag himself home, and once there he headed straight to his room. After stashing the condoms under his bed, he curled up with Teddy, and cried himself to sleep.

The End