Disclaimer: Im soo terribly glad I don't own BS, how can you have so many people in a pop group? I would like to own Busted though (especially Charlie drools) oh and we don't own Avril, Beyonce, JLo or Jamelia either. So let's get back to business.
Chapter 10 Blazin Pot and the polyjuice plot.
Back to Hogwarts
Harry was happy as it was the Christmas holidays and he could get down to answering his fan mail from adoing girls begging him to date them and kiss them.
"coughnocough" was Tiny Ron's response to Harry's prediction. "Would you like a cough drop Ron darling, or are you auditioning for Umbridge?" said hermione sweetly. Then Harry heard the most jokes thing in the whole wide wizarding world, something that no self respecting wizard(as Harry very much was)would respond to, "I have absolutely spiffing news Harry"
"Have I made it into Blazin' Squad?, I knew they wouldn't resist my absolute over buffness, see you ate the CROSS ROADS cross roads CroSS RoooADS!!" Harry began to dance around shaking his very nice bum in the camera singing blaxzin squads very crappy retarded songs.
"errr...............NAO" sighed Tiny Ron Patting Harrys back so that he crumpled beneath him.
"Well, erm.......I wasn't expecting my letter until next month anyways..........."
"Didn't you say that in September?" retorted Tiny Ron
but Harry could not reply as Hermione the killjoy interrupted
"No, Harry Malfoy and those dumbass nobheads are staying at Hogwarts over the holidays, we can use the polyjuice potion on them!"
"Why is that go......" Harry was punched in the ribs as Malfoy And the overly fat retards behind him came up to him. "I don't like you" said Malfoy bluntly "What u gonna do bout it?" Harry, Hermione and Ron stared at him , giving him the evils. "ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!! MOMMMMMMY!" cried Malfoy as an ambush of flying marshmallows and jaffa cakes attacked his rear and Ron attacked him with his pimp stick! But then even though there where yellow, fluffy marshmallows magically flying everywhere and everyone else in the coridoor had started whacking eachother in the arms with there DT folders crying "yellow car" Crabbe and Goyle ate them. Then Busted fall through the roof holding rock guitars and start bashing everone with it. Then Matt says, "Holy crap, we aren't Avril bloody Lavigne! Why are we destroying three perfectly good guitars?" Charlie shrugs, and says poshly, "Of course, my dear fellow, we have all the currency in the universe, thanks to the adoring fans brainwashed by our subliminal messages. Why shouldn't we annihilate three guitars?" "Good enough for me mate," says James, and continues bashing Ron's pimp stick.
Then
Ron whams Crabbe and Goyal proper hard over their big fat heads and
they fall unconciess but no one cares ha ha. Then, after pulluing
out 2 of their nose haires each they join Hermione in moaning myrtles
out of oreder bog. Then randomly, as hes a dumb idiot Tiny Ron says
"Why is it
that if something says, "do not eat" on the packaging it
becomes extra tempting to eat?" And Hermione's answer was
"Because you are a pig fat pig who ate their pet rock in 1st
year because you overslept and missed breakfast!"
"oh,
right"
"Excuse me!! I need some attention when I am about to eat I mean drink this skankified errmm......ermmmm life threatening slop!" So everyone, once again, was forced to turn their attentions to Harry. Harry had a spasm when he drank the goop and so did ron. Ha ha.
In ten seconds flat, Harry went from being a sex symbol to all the frumpy people out there to this gorilla thingy with hairy palms. And Ron looked pretty much the same. "Wow, hairy..er harry, youre....hairy!?" said Ron. And he stared at himself at the mirror. "Eek! Ive got muscles!"
Hermione was inside the girls bog and wouldn't come out. "Im not coming out" Harry was cool with that and said "I'm cool with that" but Tiny Ron was annoyed because he was dumb and didn't realize that Hermione was a hairy (er than usual) sheep "why you doggin us like dat fool?" "Haven't you read the script RONALD!? this is the part where i turn into a hairy sheep!" "oh" was Tiny Rons reply. "now get lost your wasting time dudes!" said Hermione and the Mary-Kate and Ashley woosy Duo (Lairy Bait and Bashley)
ran downstaires to the Slytherin Common room. "Oi dudette, wheres the slytherin common room?" called Harry(looking like goyal, a toilet brush) "I am a ravenclaw now get lost i am busy"
Just then Beyonce started bouncing on the trampoline in the middle of the corridor(yes there is one just read the books cough) Singing "Tonight ill be ur naughty girl tonoght im calling all ma girls, see you look me up and doooown!!" To a crowd of adoring fans including Puff Face Pansy Dorkinson and her "crew" named PMS. Then Harry and Tiny Ron sneaked past Beyonce, who was now joined by Jamelia and Jlo. "We sneaked in" giggled Tiny Ron "We sneaked in". Walking down the desterted Corridoor, Tiny Ron spotted his older brother, who was nicknamed by snoop dog himself as Big P, but Harry prefered to call him "Bush Rat" or "angry Kid" like off those videos u get on cell fones.
"What are you doing down here?" Asked Percy, "Youre those fat guys who tags along behind that Malfoy git aren't you? I am required to report your late-night wondering to Bulbus Rumblebore, what are your names again?" Said second-to-Hermione-super-neek.
"Crabbe, Goyal, where have you too been? Pigging out in the great hall all this time, you big fat retarded pieces of shi...arg, if it isn't weasleby number 3, what gives YOU the right to be here? You cant afford to wonder MY territory, fuzzle head. And Goyal, why the fuzzling heck are you wearing Glasses? Especially the harry potter brand from Dolland and Achinson, you know what? Potter just should have gone to specksavers!" "Err erm r..reading" "Reading!? I didn't know you could read" Harry and Tiny Ron followed Draco to the Slytherin common room that was bright pink and yellow. Harry, Ron and Draco had some extremely boring talk and Draco, as once again, he is so rich, finds a tiny green package on the floor and pockets it.
and hermione the giant shaggy sheep said eagerly, "WHAT DID YOU FIND OUT? WHAT DID YOU FIND OUT?" "Draco Malfoy has awful dandruff and the Slytherins are obsessed with colour coordination. Oh and Malfoy isnt the Ghetto of Slytherin'
"Oh poo, back to square 1!" baaaaed Hermione. "Watch your language, woolly bum," said Harry looking disgruntled that nobody had stopped to ask for his autograph for one whole hour, and was now shrinking back to his own buff self.
A/N: This chapter was soo much fun to write, it's one of my favourites! And the next is well funny! Keep the reviews winging it here! You guys are great!
