(AN: Thank you so much for all the reviews, I read them all of course!Sorry it's taken a bit longer to get this chapter posted, there's been all kind of stuff going on.)


Chapter 10

The next day at one o'clock, Dawn had already gone to meet Janice, and Spike was in the cellar apartment by himself.

He was standing in front of the mirror, shaving (which was much easier now he had a reflection) when he heard his cell phone ringing.

He took his duster and retrieved the cell from one of its pockets.

"Hello?"

The line was quiet for a few seconds.

"'s there anyone there?"

"Um, yes. It's eh, Adrie. You know, from the other night." She sounded a little insecure and embarassed.

"Adrie. Hello. So, about the eh, incident...?"

"Yeah." To Spike's surprise, she let out a short laugh. "Well, I don't remember all of it. But I do remember you passing out on top of me before we, eh, actually did it. Then I guess I fell asleep or something because I only remember waking up in the morning having a terrible headache and finding you gone."

"Oh. So, we didn't eh, go all the way then?"

"No."

"Ok, that's good." Spike sighed of relief. "Can we please agree to never talk about it again?"

"Um, okay, if you say so."

"Thanks Adrie. I mean really. This was a huge relief."

"Oh. Do you have a girlfriend or something? Oh, sorry, it's none of my business is it."

"Well, if you wanna know, yes, I do have girlfriend. A fiancée, in fact." Spike would've never told this to someone who might use it for some kind of blackmailing, but Adrie seemed just as embarassed about this situation as he was, and she wasn't exactly the silicone breasted blonde pushy kind.

"Oh. Glad we didn't do it then." Again with this short bark-like laugh.

"Yeah, well I guess we should hang up."

"And never talk about it again, right. Okay, bye."

They hang up.

Spike went back to shaving, feeling much more relieved. Later, he'd take Dawn out to a fancy restaurant.

He, or actually Dawn, had told the scoobies he'd stop by at the office to clear things up about the human deal, so when he was finished shaving he stepped out in the daylight.

As the sun rays hit him, he realised how lucky he was. He had a girlfriend that he loved and would soon marry, he'd gotten turned human so now he could live a happy, normal life with her.

He'd almost screwed it all up, though. But, if everything went as planned he would never have to worry about that small encounter again.

He was almost whistling when he entered the small office.

The wicca was there, as was Wesley, that black guy Gunn, Fred and Buffy. They all looked up from their books as he walked in.

"Spike!" Willow smiled. "Sit down." She gestured to the seat between her and Buffy.

The blonde woman looked suspiciously at him, as if she was inspecting him.

"So, it's true that you're human now? Dawn told me about it." Buffy explained.

"Yeah. Pretty much. Now I'm a regular guy, probably can't even take on you."

"Like you could before." Buffy smiled to show she was only joking.

"Okay, Spike, did Dawn tell you about what we found out?" Willow asked.

"She said something 'bout a demon and healing power or something." He shrugged.

"Good, well here's the deal. This demon, it has, or had, incredibly powerful healing powers. It scratched you and you got 'infected' by them. Now, this could have several kinds of effects. For example, if you'd been human before we can't be sure what would've happened. The healing probably would've taken care of any disease you might've had. But, when you were vampire, it healed you all the way up from being undead. The fever and nausea and all that were sice effects from your body learning to handle all the new stuff."

"Right, good thing we got that sorted then. You think I'm gonna have any more of those side effects?"

"I don't think so. I mean why would you now that the progress is already finished?" Spike nodded and then he came to think of something.

"What about the poof, then? You gonna try and do this on him?"

Willow looked quickly at Buffy, who was gazing to the room where Angel probably slept right now.

"Well, we have considered that. And... well, we haven't decided yet. There would be several risks involved." Wesley informed him.

"As?"

"For example we aren't even sure it'll work, since Angel has been um, undead for a considerably longer time than you. And the side effects he'd be getting would most likely be more severe than those you got, they would last for a longer time as well. Still adding to that, this demon is very rare and it will be hard to find one."

"Oh." There was a silence in the room until Buffy spoke up, a little too cheery.

"So, Spike, could you come outside for a while? I wanna speak to you." She stood up and began walking to the door.

Spike shrugged and went after her, leaving the others to research whatever they were researching when he came in.

She was leaning against the wall of the building, not looking at him when he came out.

"You know, it's so weird. All of this. At first when you left I, it was so hard. I mean, both Dawn and you are very important people to me. I, I love you both." She looked at him now.

Spike decided he'd just let her take her time to get to the point and remained silent.

Looking away again, she continued.

"I tried to put up a façade of being all right and dealing with you leaving, but it just got worse. I just, couldn't, I...I got depressed."

Spike raised his head in surprise, but she avoided him, looking at the ground.

"Buffy, I didn't know you..." She nodded.

"I know you didn't, and I didn't want to tell you either, since I knew you'd feel guilty." He opened his mouth to say something. "No, don't, just let me finish. I went to see a therapist, which helped a bit, but I felt... abnormal and I know I am, it's just that I made a decision to leave all this, demons and slaying behind me, you know, start a new life. But that would've also ment leaving the rest of all the people I know, all the people I care about. Then there woul've been nobody left. "She got a sad far away look on her face.

"When you'd been gone for, it was about three years I guess, I got a bit better, but I realized you might never come back. I wondered if you ever would. If you even... existed anymore." Now she looked at him, and he could see that her eyes were teary.

"When five years'd gone I, I didn't want to admit it but, I didn't think I was ever going to see you again and I tried so hard, I really did, not to think about you and Dawn and mum. But when you came back, all these old feelings came back to me and I just don't know what to do about them. When Dawn came to my place it was almost like we never knew each other. And I don't, I don't really know her, or you, anymore." She started sobbing.

Spike was stunned, to say at least. She had felt this bad? He stepped forward and put his arms around her.

She hugged him hard and she started to cry and shake uncontrollably. He whispered soothing words to her.

When her tears had ended and she was just sobbing again, he put his hands on her shoulders and looked into her eyes.

"Buffy, listen. It's gonna be okay. We're here now, both of us, and I, I never would've left if I knew what was going to happen. I'm sorry." She semmed to listen and her sobs reduced.

"Oh god, I'm so stupid, I just, I don't know what this is anymore. It's like one minute you're gone and out of my life and the next you're here, and then you're human, and... what are we, Spike? I know I love you and now you're human which makes stuff a lot easierto deal with and I don't know what I should do. Maybe we should try to, to have a real relationship."

Oh. He hadn't expected this.


(AN: Now pleease review!!! You can make my day by just pressing the small button so go ahead! Oh, and you can give me suggestions and tell me what you think should happen!)