Title: Out of Season
Author: DJ Clawson
Fandom: Lupin the Third
Rating: G
Pairings: None
Description: Lupin runs into Zenigata in the off-season.


Summer had always been, in Lupin's experience, a terrible time for working. Most places in the world – the more exotic, luxurious locals, certainly – were too stinkin' hot to be caught in a long, sweaty chase, unless that chase somehow involved swimming. Instead, summer was a great time to let the heat blow off – in terms of the latest heist and in terms of a working air conditioner.

Which he didn't have, at the moment. He used to think that a repairman would make it a point to work on air conditioners in the summer, just out of the kindness of his heart. Lupin briefly wondered if a super-hot diamond necklace would be a good bribe to get the guy in the apartment.

Either way, it all served to push him out the door and into the congested Tokyo air. Jigen had even stopped drinking long enough to come with him. "Friggin' Japan."

"And I thought you were a native? Or just trying to pass as one?"

Jigen sneered and smoked, which was largely what he did in the heat.

"Now, if we wanted to do our samurai impressions, we could have gone to that nice little retreat in the mountains with Goemon."

"Would I have to wear pants that look like a skirt?" Jigen reached into his breast pocket, only to discover an apparently empty pack of pall malls. "We need a cigarette run."

"Smash and grab?"

"That bored, Lupin?"

He wasn't. There was something to be said for appreciating a vacation, even if it was spent in the comfortable anonymity of an overcrowded metropolis. "Shocking as it may be, I'm actually tempted to pay for things today."

"Getting lazy, I see."

"We both know robbing a grocery store is for bored teenagers and inexperienced thugs. Which I consider myself above. So don't even joke about it."

"It's too hot to joke."

He had a point. Ten minutes later they were in a very enjoyably cool grocery store, where they spent entirely too much time browsing the aisles. Not that anything was on their schedule. And they even had those noodle packets in the brand he liked!

"How can you eat hot soup in July?" Jigen apparently had to inquire, when they were sitting on the park bench across from the store. Lupin had a steaming cup of insta-soup.

"Because we're in Japan? It's that or pizza with some sort of topping that doesn't deserve status as a pizza topping." There were times when he liked traveling, and times when he missed French cuisine. This moment was sort of a mix.

It was almost a shame to spit out a mouthful.

"What is it?" The former Mafioso had the amazing ability to go from cranky and reasonably off-guard to alarmed in mere nanoseconds.

"Pops." Lupin gestured across the park. The infamous Inspector Zenigata was on the other side of the tiny stretch of grass, facing away from them and towards what looked like a community center.

"Yeah. What are the odds? As usual." Jigen twisted his head around to see. "They must have put him on something; he's not running around like a maniac screaming your name."

"I know. I'm practically offended." Come to think of it, Zenigata WAS just standing there, looking rather nonchalant in casual slacks and a blazer. He didn't look relaxed – because, well, he NEVER looked relaxed, but he wasn't the same. "I should go over and say hello."

"Should I even bother to try and stop you? Or is this going to be one of your stupid stunts?"

"I'm just showing some common courtesy." He tossed the remains of the container in the trash. "He'd do the same for me."

"I'll be covering you in case courtesy runs out, I suppose."

Lupin straightened his tie and crossed the park. It seemed appropriate to look his best, even if Zenigata was informal. He wasn't even wearing his hat! There were definitely heavy prescriptions involved in the almost-serene way Zenigata was staring at the entrance to the rec center. "Heya, Pops!"

"What?" Zenigata characteristically fell all over himself in surprise. "Lupin! AH! What the hell are you doing here?" He quickly regained his composure, assuming a more aggressive stance. "You're under arrest! Just let me – uh –"He quickly shuffled through his blazer. "Damnit! All right, I'll have to arrest you without the cuffs this time!"

"C'mon, Pops. I think we both agree it's too hot to run around like I'm some kind of criminal and you're some kind of policeman." He held up his hands in defense. "Can't we just sort of saunter around town instead?"

"Agh! Lupin, I'm gonna get the cuffs on you as soon as I can – "

Something stopped him in his rant, and he checked his watch. He cursed in Japanese. "Look, can we pick this up in an hour?"

"Inspector Zenigata, I'm practically offended! That or you finally completed that therapy program. Which is probably better for that old ticker of yours." He paused, and realized Zenigata was actually being somewhat serious. "Wait. I think I really am offended."

"Well, don't let it go to your obnoxious little head!" Zenigata said with his usual intensity. "And you had better do your duty and report to the nearest police station, or I WILL chase you."

"You're really serious," Lupin said to some surprise. "Wait! Are you chasing another jewel thief? Because that would really break my heart."

"No – I just – HEY! I don't have to explain myself to you! You just be here in an hour and then we'll talk!" He checked his watch again. "Let's see. Go back to the house, get back here, traffic – An hour! An hour or so!" He pointed at him ferociously. "You'd better be here!" With that, he stormed across the street to the center, where the doors were opening to release dozens of kids wearing identical oversized T-shirts.

Lupin turned around and shrugged at Jigen, who was hiding behind the park bench with his revolver at the ready. The mobster returned a similar gesture of confusion. But when he had turned back to Zenigata, the good inspector was wading through the sea of children to little girl who must have been ten or eleven. "Did you have a good day?" he asked in Japanese. The girl proceeded to tell about swimming and craft making in extreme detail as they crossed the street to where Lupin was still standing. "One hour, Lupin! I just – have to take my daughter home ... and then I'm coming RIGHT BACK!"

"You have a daughter?" It didn't seem fair, suddenly, that he obviously knew so little about Zenigata while the inspector made it his life's work to know so much about HIM. He leaned over. "And what's your name, little girl?"

"Zenigata Toshiko," she said shyly, hiding behind her father in the most adorable way possible.

"Isn't that cute?" He really wanted to be more casual about it – but she WAS cute. And she did rather resemble her father, now that he thought about it. "Aren't you going to introduce us, Pops?"

"Uh – Toshiko, this is Lupin Arsene. He's a scumbag and I'm going to put him away."

Either this was the most elaborate trap Zenigata had ever thought of, or it was the oddest coincidence all summer – and Lupin's life was full of odd coincidences. "Now don't say it like that. You make it sound like I'm kind of criminal lowlife."

Zenigata proceeded to do something Lupin had never seen before – restrain his anger as he said in French, "Lupin, I'm going to take her home because she gets an afternoon snack, and then I'm going to come back here and bust your ass all the way to the mainland. So you'd better be here!" He switched back to Japanese, his voice pleasant and calm. "Let's go home, Toshi." He managed a glare at Lupin before stalking off, holding Toshiko's hand in his own.

By the time Zenigata was gone, Jigen appeared at his side, re-holstering his gun. "What the hell was that?"

"I'm supposed to meet him in an hour," Lupin said numbly.

"And you're gonna stay around for the ambush?"

"He is making time for me. After he takes care of his ... daughter."

"That's his kid? For real?" Jigen looked as shocked as he felt. "I didn't know he had one. Or that he's ever gotten laid."

"Well, maybe he had more time before he was chasing me."


Maybe it was just a little guilt that kept him on the bench. Lupin preferred to think it was a relaxed boredom, because that felt safer. Either way, he had zoned out when he heard someone sit down next to him.

Zenigata had returned, complete with his trademark coat and hat, but without his trademark over-enthusiasm. Instead he plopped down on the bench next to Lupin, holding the cuffs in his hand. "Man, it's hot."

"See? This is why I said we shouldn't chase each other around Tokyo today."

"Yeah, but you're not gonna turn yourself in, so it's my duty." He tried to get to this feet, but failed. "Man, it's hot."

Lupin had to agree; he was sweating through his silk shirt, his jacket already discarded. "Your daughter is sweet."

"Yeah." Apparently, Zenigata was too distracted by the heat to really notice or be suspicious of anything. "I have to be back by around five, so let's wrap this up by then."

Neither of them made any movement. It was just not one of the those days that encouraged that sort of thing.

"I didn't know you had a kid."

"Well, she's in boarding school most of the year, and then I only have custody over her – wait, why am I telling you this?"

"Well, you already know everything about my life. It only seemed fair for me to show an interest."

"This is not about being fair! We are not buddies! I'm an officer of the law and you're going to jail!" He snapped a cuff on Lupin, who slipped out of it casually. But he didn't even try again. Zenigata only sat there, stewing in his own sweat. "Sometime when it's not so hot. And I don't have a babysitter on the clock."

Lupin didn't want to argue with him. "I'll keep my appointment book open for you." He stood up, but Zenigata didn't follow. "Seeya, Pops!" All he got in return was a tired, distracted wave before hopping back across the park to Jigen.

"What the hell did you say to him?"

"Nothing special." Lupin looked back, and Zenigata was already gone. "Just, you know, the usual." He plopped down on the bench. "Makes you wonder."

"Wonder what?"

"Why they would have a guy like that on all kinds of international cases. Fujiko, then me."

Jigen shrugged. "Maybe he just knows a lot of languages."

"Now now, I like to give Pops a bit more credit than that." Though apparently, he wasn't giving Zenigata ENOUGH credit. "There's also the obsessive personality."

"Yeah, he's a friggin' loon." Jigen stomped out his cigarette. "So should we cut out of town?"

"I may deeply regret this, but I don't think he's gonna chase us for a little while. At least until the weather changes." He shrugged. "Besides, I've got a great idea, and it's one that won't actually get us into trouble."

"THIS I'd like to hear."


By the time Koichi Zenigata returned to the house, he had decided it had been wise not to chase Lupin. It would have ended with him handcuffed to a moving train or something equally stupid. It was better this way. Lupin could take a vacation whenever he wanted – so why couldn't he?

"Oh, and Inspector Zenigata," the babysitter said on her way out, "someone dropped off a package for you." She handed him a brown box and a card. "Just so you know."

Maybe he wasn't the best of fathers – hell, he didn't even consider himself a GOOD father these days – but he knew enough to check on his daughter, who was watching television. "How late does your mother let you stay up?"

"Until ten?"

"Nice try. Get ready for bed, kiddo." Apparently, his voice still carried some authority, because she hopped up and disappeared to her room.

"Whew," he sighed, and finally turned to the card, which he opened. Somehow he wasn't surprised by the familiar handwriting.

Heya Pops!

We gotta stop meeting like that. It's bad for your heart and my conscience. Anyhow, enjoy the rest of your vacation.

- Lupin

PS I got your daughter something. I don't know when her birthday is, but I have a feeling you missed a bunch of them, so this should make up for it.

Zenigata's attention now turned to the small brown package, which he had previously ignored. It went without saying that Toshiko was not going to open it first, not if Lupin had packed it. How did he even get it here in time? Was that enough time to set a bomb?

But it wasn't a bomb. It was a beautiful diamond necklace. Zenigata knew exactly what it was worth – after all, he'd been trying to recover it for three months now.

"Agh!" he said, shaking his fists at nothing. "LUPANNNNNNNNN!"

Finis.