"I'm goin' to a GC concert!" James yelled gaily.
"Fa shizzle, like, ya know!" Remus screeched.
Sirius, meanwhile, had issues of his own. He sat in the corner of the Common Room, two bottles of nailpolish in front of him.
"Jamesie, which color, hot pink, or black? Or.. both, like BENJI!" James looked lovingly at his poster of GC.
I don't care either way, ya know why, Sirius? I bet Remus knows why."
"Because goth guys make you horny," Remus replied dully.
Suddenly Devony, some creepy, random goth freak ran into the room, cackling madly.
"GOTH GUYS MAKE ME HORNY TOO!! Wait.... Wtf? YOU STOLE MY SAYING, QUEER!" she screamed.
"Fo shizzle, like ya know?" Billy Martin popped in, doing a hand motion thing. Promptly, James, Sirius, and Devony became very horny. Some blonde person then burst in the door.
"I SMELLED BILLY!! I KNOW HE'S HERE!! DON'T DENY IT." She then saw Billy.
"Oh..my..GOD, Becky! Look at HIS butt! It's so..... small.. and... HOTT!"
Billy walked out and everyone swooned. Now we know a little bit more about Remus...
"My guitar makes me horny! You can slit my throat, and with my one last dying breath I'll apologize for bleeding on your shirt," Billy declared.
Devony then walked out with Billy's guitar, a perverted and extremely smug look on her face. "Are you horny now?"
"Yes."
"Good." She took a step closer to Billy.
"Are you horny now?"
"Yes."
"Good." She took yet another step closer until she was barely a foot away from him.
"Are you even hornier NOW?" she whispered seductively, running her tongue along her teeth.
"YES YES YES!"
"I know." Billy promptly hyperventilated. "CRAP! WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME, BILLY?!??!?"
The blonde girl, let's call her...The Blonde Girl With The Black Shirt On That Says "Strange Is Not A Crime" (a.k.a. TBGWTBSOTSSINAC, or.. um.. Liz for short), walked in and shouted, "DUDE! YOU KILLED BILLY! AAH.. bother.. AAAAH!"
Benji stalked in, muttering, "Good God, Billy, NOT AGAIN! By the way......Joel makes me horny!"
Joel randomly stated, "Saucepans make me horny." (Billy shouted to himself, "I KNEW IT! I KNEW IT ALL ALONG! But my guitar still makes me horny!" He sad the last part in a sing-song voice.)
James arose from his swoon and said loudly while admiring himself in the mirror, "I'm so hot, I make MYSELF horny!"
A hideous, slimy, creepy girl leaped out of a giant well. "I'm so happy you've broken the curse and freed my spirit! Now I can live happily ever after!"
"Siriusly?" James said.
"Naw, I'm just screwing with ya..."
"Siriusly?"
Liz suddenly had a thought (the first one in like 400 seconds, ya know?), "Jordon, ("MY NAME IS JAMES, BIOTCH!") (James then biotch slapped her, biotch.) how are you spelling... "seriously"?"
"I dunno... biotch!" He replied casually.
Ron, Harry, Hermione, and Voldemort suddenly popped out of nowhere from a different time and place.
"I love magic," Harry stated.
"I love to learn!" Hermione added.
"I love YOU, Harry!" Ron declared.
"Um..." Harry shifted uncomfortably to the side.
Voldemort ran up to Ron and biotch slapped him.
"He's my ho, biotch!" Voldemort shouted.
"BUT HE MAKES ME HORNY!" Ron sobbed.
"Yea, he makes me horny too," James said, sighing.
Justin, the lesser known 4th Marauder who is taking Peters place, sprinted in and said in an odd voice "The shiot has hit the fan MuthaFuckaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!" and then ran out.
Liz and Devony promptly cracked up. Of course.
"Ya know what? I cry when angels deserve to die." Liz said dully.
"Answer...the phone..I know that you're home. I wanna get you alone and do it again....and again and again and again" Devony sang loudly to Billy. Even though she had never done anything like Billy. Freaking loser. ("DON'T TELL EVERYONE!" she screeched.)
Benji ran in, rapping loudly to everyone, "I like big butts and I cannot lie! You otha brothas can't deny when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist I get SPRUNG!"
Some OTHER girl (with a tiny butt, by the way) ran in and jumped on Benji, latching herself onto him like a leech. I know. Its horrible. James especially thought so.
Poor James Potter, feeling neglected and angry, walked angrily over to her and biotch slapped her.
"AAAAAAH!!" she cried like a wounded buffalocow.
Paul, who was sitting in a corner the whole time with a box of cheerios looking.. extremely happy...said loudly to the LeechGirl, "BABY GOT BACK! Little in the middle but ya got much back!"
During most of this Billy had sat, dejected, in the other corner. However, Liz had noticed and gone to cheer him up. Bitch ,Devony thought angrily. All actions stopped as Lily Evans walked down the stairs. In a towel. James dropped to his knees in front of her and began serenading her. She kicked him in the balls. For the third time that day.
Poor James, Liz thought sadly and left Billy to comfort James, even though that IS her brother's name... Oh well. She apparently liked to "comfort" people. With her long blonde hair that's all.. swishy.. she.. swished it... seductively.... And ran her tongue along her teeth.. seductively....I think she likes seductiveness. James was horny. AGAIN. And Liz was happy for once in her life...
Devony too was happy, and for the first time she was doing nothing especially horny. She was having a staring contest with Billy. Wait.. that's horny too, isn't it?! She needs a life. ("WITH BILLY!!!!" she added happily, causing her to lose the staring contest. She then had to do whatever Billy wanted for the next hour.... Which we all know she loved. What did you expect?! She DID have Billy's guitar...so in a round-about way, Billy was doing whatever she wanted. She still loved every moment.)
An hour later a very disheveled looking Billy and an even worse off (but extremely happy) Devony emerged from a bedroom conveniently located off this one room that our entire story is currently taking place in. In case you wanted to know, the room was blue. It just was. Get used to it.
A/N:
WOO! SO, for those of you who don't know me (us), i bet your surprised, if you even read this far. Arntcha, arntcha? BTW- we cowrote (yes, COW rote) this randomly one night wilst high on chocolate and glue. (ok... so maybe not the glue...) More coming? (ha i said coming! sorry bout that... continue with your lives.. or lack thereof if your reading this..) I DONT KNOW! Maybe, maybe not, probably. Tari, shall we write more? YES YES YES! (Nari wrote that part. in yo face biotch) (Tari says Go To Hell, Nari!) (Nari biotch slaps her) (we're not weird.) (nope. not us.) (are you confused yet) (im confused) (me too) (shall we stop?) (......) ok. we stopped. we have just wasted several minutes or more of YOUR life! Congrats! to.. us! We're leaving now.
