Chapter 17: Illegally Blond
"Lucius, what on earth are you doing in my N.E.W.T level potions class?" Snape said, as he was surveying his classroom. "And why are you wearing pink?" Lucius, who had been scribbling notes with a fluffy pink pencil, looked up and smiled charmingly.
"Sorry? Oh! I need a N.E.W.T to be accepted for Auror training." Lucius flashed another smile at Snape, who was reminded rather forcefully of Gilderoy Lockhart.
"Why do you want to be an Auror?" Snape said, looking slightly disgusted. Aurors, eew!
"Well, remember I had been dating that Narcissa Black II for two years? One night she invited me for dinner, and I was wearing my best dress, because I thought she was going to ask me to marry her, but she dumped me instead! Because she said she needed someone serious if she was ever going to get anywhere in the Death Ea... I mean, Ministry. She thought I was some sort of bimbo! So I am determined to prove my intelligence and superiority by becoming the best Auror there ever was! That ought to show her!" Lucius said, waving his fluffy pen, and smiling.
"Lucius," Snape said, closing his eyes as though he wanted to shut out the demons of stupidity that were tormenting him. "You're already married."
"I am?" Lucius said, smoothing back his hair. "To whom?"
"Yes, you are! To Narcissa!"
"Oh." Lucius said, blankly. "Well, I'd best be going then." And he took his miniature werewolf in a handbag and tottered out of the room.
