Title: Dangerously in Love
Summary: Yes you already guessed it, The Draco Malfoy(Sex-god of Hogwarts) is
in Love for the first time. We all know that he's spoiled rotten by his father.
Unfortunately his father can't get this for him, which makes him Dangerously in
Love.
Warning: This is SLASH. Boy/Boy---- Don't like it? BUGGER OFF! And don't
flame me telling me it's disgusting, because that makes me very pissed off...
That's my warning for now...
Pairings: DM/Everybody in Hogwarts(Ok, now I'm lying... No Huffelpufs and
Absolutely NO Gryffindors. Ravenclaws? ... Only if they're hot and smart.
Slytherins, welcome to my lovely, black and silk bed) & DM/HP (If
everything goes as planned...)
Year: 6th year, and believe me it was Hell for me
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Except my little plot in his story... And the Draco
Malfoy in my dreams...*licks her lips*… ok I don't own that Draco either!
Thanks to my beta-reader: MEGHAN!!!
Chapter 5: Give unto me
~*~
Soon I know I'll wake from this dream
don't try to fix me I'm not broken
~Evanescence; Hello~
~*~
The whole following day Draco remained in high spirits. To say he was delighted
with Harry's answer was an understatement. His shopping in Hogsmeade had gone
as planned. If you knew where to go, you wouldn't raise suspicion if you kept
your identity hidden. Besides the furniture and other stuff would be in
Slytherin and Black colours. He was still a Malfoy and they did not place
hideous colours like pink in their houses. Red was fine, if it was dark red,
the colour of blood. So he did buy some red things to make Harry comfortable in
his cottage.
The big kidnapping day was coming closer too. Draco got nervous every time he
thought about it. That day Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter would be vanished from
the earth for two whole weeks. If things worked as planned they would come back
at school as lovers. If things went terribly bad, he would erase Harry's memory
and they would both reappear, without being lovers. But Draco didn't want to
think about that.
He sat outside, after eating something in his room and freshening up a bit,
with about fifteen minutes to go before Harry and he had an 'appointment', when
he saw a large black owl heading his way.
'Oh no! Not again father,' Draco thought sighing. 'My father just had to come
and ruin my mood ... like always.'
Draco pouted at the owl when it landed on a branch beside him. Wishing he could
scare the owl away and be done with it, Draco took the letter. Their owls were
trained not to take no for an answer.
Draco took the letter and decided he would read the letter later. When he
looked up, the owl was still there, eyeing him questionably.
"Don't tell me you want an answer ..." Draco growled. Another thing their owls
were trained for. Not to leave before they got an answer, in certain cases.
The owl angrily picked Draco's hand.
"Ouch!" Draco exclaimed glaring at the owl. Which took him much force to do,
being in his elfish features. Draco rolled his eyes and opened the letter.
Draconis Malfoy,
I am greatly disappointed in you. Haven't
I always told you to respond within one day? I have been awaiting your reply,
but none has come.
This is a very serious matter Draconis, and your concentration of this matter
will not be lacking. Do you understand me? I will be expecting an immediate
reply.
(Your mother sends her love)
Sincerely Yours,
Father.
Draco sighed. 'Perfect timing as ever father.' He thought sarcastically.
He took out his swan quill and turned over the letter to reply to his father. He
knew that he would be getting reprimanded on writing his reply on the back, but
Harry could be coming any minute.
Father,
I apologize for not replying to you right
away, but as you know, I am watched here in Hogwarts and cannot always reply as
fast as I wish to. I hope that you are satisfied with this reply. I have taken
this matter very seriously father. I am looking forward to cooperating in the
unexpected.
I will also look forward to the commands I will be getting to prove my loyalty.
Sincerely Yours,
Draconis Malfoy
Draco placed the reply to the owls leg and watched it fly away. He knew his
father wanted him to be clear about his loyalty, but he didn't want to chose
just yet. He certainly didn't want his father to have doubts about his loyalty.
So he decided to leave it in the middle, not confirming anything and not
denying anything. Just like his mind was undecided.
His head shot up when he heard footsteps approaching and when he looked he
could see Harry walk out the Hogwarts big wooden doors with his broom. Why
in Merlin's name did Harry need a broom for? So he could fly away when he tried
to kiss him again?
Something inside him wanted to jump up and down and Draco could not control his
excitement. He tried hard to sit still and wait until Harry was standing
underneath the tree again, but decided to jump down from the tree. Harry would
look around this time for a sign of him, and it would look really odd when
Harry saw him sitting in a tree. He did not want Harry to think he wasn't
human. Well, he wasn't, but it was close.
To the human race he had only three DNA-codes the humans did not have. It all
began with a mutant gene. The code was so strong that it morphed into a new
species, the elves. The Elves evolved, while the humans stayed the same. So
Elves weren't older than humans, as many humans thought. Just superior, because
they had lots of advantages over humans.
Standing next to the tree he waited until Harry was close enough to say
something. He noticed how insecure and nervous the boy was. Harry kept fumbling
with his scarf, looking to the ground with a nervous grin on his face.
Draco checked the position of his hood one more time before stepping towards
Harry.
"And so we meet again. Hello Harry Potter," Draco said smoothly. Holding out
his hand for Harry to take.
"Hullo." Harry grinned nervously.
When Harry took Draco's hand he pulled Harry close and kissed his cheek. It was
then that Draco's skin decided to glow again.
"I'd rather greet you this way." Draco whispered. Noticing the red tint across
Harry's cheeks and his skin glowing. "I'm glad you wanted to meet me again. I've
been very curious how you are doing."
"Fine, I'm fine." Harry said. Still as nervous as hell. "You're glowing ..."
This time it was Draco's turn to blush. "Yes, I know. It happens sometimes."
Draco said. He really had to find out what this glowing meant. Was it normal to
glow when you were close to another person?
"And how are your two friends?" Draco asked. He already knew the answer.
"Fine too." Harry smiled a bit sadly.
Draco could feel Harry's ache for their lacking friendship and bit his lip. "Are
they beginning to understand?" Draco asked, before he even noticed.
Harry frowned and looked down again. "Yes, well ... at least they know. Although
I'm not sure that they understand. They are so afraid of hurting me that they
don't realize that they're hurting me even more by being so careful and holding
back all the time. I think they're beginning to think I've gone mad. Especially
after our last meeting." Harry finished with a small laugh.
"I'm sorry," Draco whispered. "I did not know our meeting had such an impact on
your friends."
"Oh, no don't be!" Harry exclaimed. "I'm sure they think I'm seeing things. It's
ok, they'll come around."
"I wish I could offer you a seat, but the ground is wet and cold." Draco said. Pointing
to the ground.
"It's ok, we'll uh ... Stand." Harry smiled.
"Are you going to fly?" Draco asked, letting his eyes rest on Harry's broom.
"I read this book about elves this afternoon. It said that you had wings, so I
uhm ... I thought we could go for a ride or something like that. On second
thought, it sounds really stupid." Harry blushed deep red.
Draco couldn't help but smiling. He would squeal if Harry decided to get any
cuter than this. "It was a good idea, Harry. Unfortunately, I do not have my
wings. They're a terrible burden to carry around all day and not completely
necessary. I could let them grow, but I would have to take a potion to do so."
Harry looked at him with wide eyes. "I didn't know you elves could
decide to just not have wings. I would love to have wings. I love to
fly, it makes me feel free." Harry said still amazed.
"You could take wings too, if you use the right potion. The magical world is
very advanced these days." Draco smiled. "Do you think your broom could carry
two people?"
Harry nodded as a smile reappeared on his face. "Do you know how to fly?" Harry
asked.
"Not exactly." Draco lied. Suddenly imagining Harry teaching him to fly a
broom.
"Well, then you will have to sit in front of me." Harry said matter-of-factly. He
looked at Draco and could see him wondering why Draco hadn't taken off his
hood.
"I can't show you my identity, Harry. I'm sorry." Draco said. Feeling truly
sorry.
"It's ok. It makes it a bit harder for me though. How do I know you're not
fooling with me? Maybe you are a Death Eater pretending to be an elf. According
to the books elves don't exist anymore." Harry said making Draco flinch.
Draco knew that at one point, it would come to this. He couldn't expect Harry
to go with him so easily.
"I swear on my heart that I am not trying to fool you in any way. Nor am I a
Death Eater. I could never be. We, elves, are creatures of the light. We cannot
stand Dark-related things. Fairlowlyn wouldn't have brought you my message if I
had been something bad. She's as good as they get. If I wouldn't have been an
elf, she wouldn't have come to me." Draco explained.
Hoping Harry would trust him. He had a horrible feeling in his stomach. Technically
he wasn't a Death Eater, but he felt like he was lying to Harry. He was about
to become one, so he had no right to say such things.
"Besides, I don't think a Death Eater would do what I did last time and I do
not have a wand."
He really didn't have his wand with him, stupid of course. He forgot it in his
room before he came here. Probably due to the excitement of meeting Harry
again, his Harry.
Harry smiled. "Why do the books say that you don't exist anymore?"
"Because we have integrated into the wizard society and we keep our identity
hidden. Humans, wizards, think that we have integrated so much that we have
vanished. What they don't know is that the Elf genes are dominant over a
wizards." Draco explained smiling.
"Do you live in a wizard society too?" Harry asked with wide eyes again.
Draco shook his head. "I cannot tell you that, Harry. Shall we go and fly, or
don't you want to anymore?"
Harry mounted his broom and signaled Draco to come and sit in front of him. "I
know this place across the lake. It's where I go when I really don't want to be
found and have the time. Shall we go there?" Harry asked.
"Sounds great." Draco smiled mounting the broom in front of Harry. "You will
have to hold me tight. I find this rather frightening." Draco lied. Smirking
with the thought of Harry's arms around him.
Although Draco could not see Harry, he could feel Harry blush behind him. Harry
slowly put his hands in front of Draco, to his amusement. Now he could feel
Harry's chest against his back, although it was not close enough for Draco's liking.
When Draco placed his hands upon Harry's he could feel Harry's grip tighten
around the wood and had to suppress a snicker.
"We'll just float first." Harry said hoarsely behind him.
Draco nodded and Harry let the broom float into the air.
"You alright?" Harry asked, after floating for a few seconds.
Draco nodded again, smirking. "Could you hold me tighter when we begin
to fly?" Draco asked innocently. He felt a pang of guilt because he was fooling
Harry so cruelly. On the other hand ... Harry's excitement made him even more
excited and he could hardly sit still.
"Alright." Harry said sliding more towards him.
Draco slid a back a bit so they were as close as they could get. He could
practically feel Harry's cheeks burning against his hood.
Slowly they began to fly. The way Harry handled him made Draco feel special. As
if he were glass and able break if he hit the ground. Flying extremely slow and
asking every single second if he was ok.
"Are you ready to go and fly over the lake?" Harry asked next to Draco's ear,
making it tickle.
"Yes." Draco said. Feeling Harry's excitement increase
Harry leaned forward to increase the brooms speed. Draco found himself pressed
between Harry and the broom.
The ride over the lake was a steady ride, so after Draco exclaimed tons of
times how special flying was and how beautiful, he took the time to play around
with Harry's fingers.
Although Harry's fingers were tightly clinging to the broom, Draco's fingers
managed to play with two of Harry's fingers. Harry's hands were big, manly and
slightly dirty. Draco didn't mind, they were perfect, they were Harry's.
Images of those hands caressing his body filled his head. And suddenly he was
happy Harry was holding him, or he would have fallen off his broom. Draco was
feeling light in the head and was sure the emotions he was feeling weren't only
his. They were far too strong.
When he grew slightly tired of Harry's hands, he entwined their legs. Rubbing
his leg against Harry's. He could feel Harry's heart beat increase and smirked.
They talked about Quidditch for a while where Draco pretended to not know it
exactly. Harry was talking so animatedly about it that Draco couldn't stop
smiling all the way.
"We're nearly there" Harry said. Flying lower and lower.
Draco felt a wave of disappointment rush through him. Now he had to begin all
over again with getting close to Harry.
Draco remembered Fairlowlyn's words and reminded himself to make Harry feel
special. Well, that wasn't going to be a big problem ...
To him Harry was extremely special. Not only because he was 'the-boy-who-lived',
but also because he was Harry and Harry was special. Draco could not
believe someone could be as kind, honest, loving and caring person as Harry
was. He was truly good. He could feel the warmth Harry's goodness was radiating
and it felt so good.
They both sat down on the ground as soon as they landed. Both forgetting the
ground was wet from the rain and melting snow.
Draco had to keep himself from yelling. 'Ew! I'm all wet!' He knew he would
sound like the snobbish Malfoy.
"It's kind of wet." Harry said, grinning softly.
"Well, that was hard not to notice." Draco smiled.
They were both silent for a while. Both content with the way the situation was.
"Look!" Draco exclaimed pointing to the sky. "It's beginning to snow again."
"It's so pretty," Harry whispered as the thick white flakes began whirling in
front of his face. "I love the snow."
"Me too, it's so perfectly white." Draco said.
Harry frowned and looked at him. "That's what I was going to say. How do you
always know exactly what's going on and what I want to say?"
"I don't know. I feel it, and I do know you. Although you do not know me,"
Draco whispered. Harry Potter really did not know the Draco Malfoy.
Harry knew the Malfoy, Draco always pretended to be. It was a real Malfoy, in
his human form he might really be that way. Although when he was in his elvish
form it all seemed to be a lie. Just like Harry. Everybody knew Harry Potter,
but there were few who knew Harry, just Harry.
He knew he would think about this matter very differently when he was back in
his human form.
"Oh." was all Harry could say in reply.
"I'm sorry that I cannot tell you everything you want to know," Draco
whispered. Suddenly feeling like this meeting was a bad idea.
"It's ok. I often feel like hiding my identity too." Harry whispered. Disappointment
clearly rang through in his voice.
They sat in silence for a couple of minutes. Draco felt like he wanted to kick
something or whine really hard out of frustration. During the few minutes Draco
sensed a certain longing.
"Are you .. gay?" Harry suddenly asked.
Draco frowned and looked at Harry who was looking at him with his lips pressed
against each other. "Well, I suppose that I ehm ..." This was rather hard for
Draco. He did not want to acknowledge the fact that he was in deed gay if he
was attracted to a boy. Draco sighed. "I suppose I am."
"Don't you want to be gay?" Harry asked.
"Harry, you know as well as I do that everybody longs to be 'normal'. Especially
the ones who are not. Like the two of us. But the fact is that there is no
normal. If you try to be normal all your life you've wasted it. It doesn't
matter if I want to be gay, the fact is that I am. I will not be happy
pretending that I'm not. So I can hide underneath a stone for the rest of my
life and be unhappy ... or face the fact that I am. If people do not accept me
the way that I am so be it. I will not live a lie." Draco said. Realizing that
maybe he could be ok with the fact that he was gay after all.
"I totally agree with you, but why am I afraid to tell my friends . I have this
feeling that I will disappoint everybody if I say so." Harry whispered.
Draco's heart jumped uncontrollably and his skin was glowing even worse. He
could not believe Harry was telling him this. "Harry ..." Draco whispered. Taking
his hand. "All your friends want for you is you to be happy. What kind of
friends are they anyway if they think that you're weird."
Draco looked down and thought about how his father would react if he told
Lucius that he was gay. His friends ... would they accept it? Surely they
weren't the only ones in the school that were gay ... right?
When Draco looked up again, Harry was staring in his eyes. Luckily the hood
only revealed his eyes, cheeks and mouth. Not his hair, or forehead. Harry was
sitting dangerously close his hand moving towards Draco's cheek. Draco
swallowed as Harry's face came closer and closer until there was so little
space between them that Draco could feel Harry's warm breath tickling his
parted lips. Harry's longing to kiss him doubled his and Draco found himself in
the most exciting moment he had ever experienced.
Harry kept staring into his eyes, while he hand cupped Draco's cheek. Harry's
eyes fluttered shut when Draco felt a connection between Harry's lips and his. Their
lips lingered on top of each other until Draco pressed his lips firmly upon
Harry's. Sliding his arms around Harry's neck and deepening the kiss by letting
his tongue come out to play.
He, however had not closed his eyes. Afraid of the fact that Harry would recognize
him as Draco Malfoy. Of course his features were different and he was glowing
almost blinding now but there was still a big resemblance between him and his
human form.
Slowly his eyes fluttered shut tooo as Harry rolled over and pulled Draco on
top of him.
When the kiss ended Draco placed his hand over Harry's eyes. "You cannot see
me." Draco whispered. Removing the hood a little to have access to Harry's
neck.
Harry was holding him around his waist and smiled at him.
While ravishing Harry's neck, his other hand slid underneath Harry's shirt
without unbuttoning it. Harry's skin was warm and smooth and Draco couldn't
wait to feel Harry's skin on his. Knowing this was not the time, Draco slowly
moved up to Harry's mouth. Kissing the boy once again.
"Did someone ever tell you how beautiful and special you are?" Draco whispered
in Harry's ear. He could feel Harry shiver underneath him. "Because you are. So
special ... and so incredibly beautiful to me."
He kissed Harry one more time before putting his hood back on and removing his
hand from Harry's eyes. He stood up and turned to the sun.
"We must get back." Draco said. Looking to the fastly setting sun.
Harry nodded and stood up as well. He grabbed his broom and mounted it again.
~*~
On the way back neither of them spoke much. Draco noticed that the closer they
got to the Hogwarts ground the slower Harry began to fly. He didn't mind, he
didn't want this to be over either.
Tomorrow he had to be Draco Malfoy again and have cruel thoughts and be hated
by Harry.
Harry kissed him once more. "Did you
know you stole my first boy-kiss the other time?" Harry smiled blushing.
"I did? I'm honored." Draco teased.
"I feel kind of strange doing this. I don't even
know you." Harry said biting his lip.
"I know you and trust me Harry ... you do know
me." Draco whispered while he kissed Harry for the last time. "Now go!" He pushed Harry towards the Hogwarts
doors. "You will see me soon."
Harry started walking, but he kept looking back. Every time Draco waved, until
he could not hear or see Harry anymore.
~*~
Late that night Draco found his way back to his dorm again. Which wasn't that
hard. He could hear anyone or anything approaching from meter's away.
Lying in his bed, he was still glowing and smiling. He could not believe that
something as beautiful as this was happening to him ... The
Prince of Darkness.
~*~
~*~
hello
I'm the lie living for you so you can hide
don't cry
~Evanescence; Hello~
~*~
This is the end of the chapter, but I, being me, wrote a little bit more. I wrote it when I was feeling depressed. Please don't flame me on this part. It's just Draco thinking about his situation with Harry. With, of course, lyrics of Evanescence. The lyrics are telling you exactly what I think Draco is feeling in this chapter.
Please Review.
*****************
*
I've been watching you from a distance
The distance sees through your disguise
All I want from you is your hurting
I want to heal you
I want to save you from the dark
*
Draco sat in his room, watching the snow come down. His heart was clouded with troubles. His own troubles, Harry's troubles.
If only Harry opened up to him. If only he could take away Harry's suffering, but even in his elfish form Harry did not dare to open his heart. Clouded was Harry's mind, heavy his troubled and dark heart.
Draco didn't know that the death of someone you love could have such an impact on your life and he wouldn't have known if he hadn't met Harry in his elfish features. The feeling was indescribable. A dark guilt lingering in your mind and an empty space in your heart or feelings. The anger that it is not fair almost makes you go mad.
Never you feel truly happy. You don't know what it is that keeps you in that black bottomless pit. Sometimes your standing on the edge, relieved that you're finally out, but somehow you always end up in the dark.
Even when they kissed Draco could feel Harry's pain. It was always there and would not vanish unless someone took it away.
Could it all be the death of Sirius? Or was there more... More shouting to be told. This couldn't be everything. Was it the fact that Voldemort entered his body last year? Did that cause the dark thoughts Harry was obviously having. Or did Harry just think his life was worthless. That Harry himself was worthless and guilty of murder.
*
Why should I care if they hurt you
Somehow it matters more to me
Than if I were hurting myself
Save you (save you)
I'll save you
*
He wanted Harry to feel special, to feel free and loved. Could Harry not feel his love? How could Harry, He did not even understand his love for Harry, nor this constant longing. The urge to be close to him. The longing to feel his heart close to his heart.
He never knew love when he was a child. Only Hate, Power and the effects that money have. But still Harry managed to make him go mad out of the desire to enflame Harry's frozen heart and let Harry enflame him.
They always say that love will find a way. But he had been so stupid to let Harry fall in love with the real him. The Draco he could never be in real life. The Draco he would have to lock away when he would become a Death Eater. If he would become a Death Eater.
Life was so complicated. So damn complicated that sometimes you wonder if it's worth living. Will your life be as you long it to be, or will you be waiting and hoping all your life for it to change. That the times when you are love and loved to not come... That love is just a fairytale. That love doesn't exists. That people made it up to make life more bearable, to keep oneself hoping and in the end you get disappointed. Or you find someone willing to live a lie with you. Pretending to love each other, thinking it is love, but in fact it's just something your mind made up.
And yet he felt as if he would die for Harry...
'Love is the most horrible thing, except if the other loves you back. I don't know who invented love, but he's one hell of an evil person to me! It's not fair to love someone so bad, and get nothing in return. Life's not fair and Love's not fair at all!'
*
Give unto me your troubles
I'll endure your suffering
Place onto me your burden
I'll drink your deadly poison
*
Draco closed his eyes and let his mind drift off. To what Harry and he were doing yesterday afternoon.
The longing kisses they shared. He knew Harry wouldn't ever do this with Draco Malfoy. Not in his life. Quite ironic really, that the boy had no idea that he was in fact kissing a somewhat changed version.
If only their love for each other could be free...
If only their love would be accepted...
But it was not...
And yet his love for Harry was strong. Through all the doubts he had, it remained. He couldn't even remember the number of times he had tried to push it away. Lock it away deep inside his heart. How many times he cursed himself and his life for being in the situation he was in, but it did not go. It increased, grew stronger... until he realised that he really did love Harry, from the bottom of his heart.
*
Fear not the flame of my love's candle
Let it be the sun in your world of darkness
Give unto me all that frightens you
I'll have your nightmares for you
If you sleep soundly
*
By Evanescence; give unto me
