[b]Part 23[/b]

One day, months later, Liz opens the door of the small apartment she shares with Max to find Maria and Isabel standing there. She stares at them in astonishment for a long moment, then steps aside, allowing them entrance.

"God," Isabel breathes, her eyes running over Liz. "Look at you!" She then scans the room anxiously. "Where is he?"

"He went for a run," Liz replies. She is still in shock. But overwhelming that feeling is a sense of acute pleasure. She knows that she has missed her friends, but it is not until she lays eyes on them again that she realizes just how much.

"How are you?" Maria demands, before reaching out and pulling Liz into a fierce hug. "I know we weren't supposed to come, but Isabel and I just couldn't let it go." She glances at Isabel. "We had to see for ourselves that you were both okay."

"We're okay," Liz reassures them, before moving to hug Isabel. Max's sister is still staring at Liz's middle, her eyes slightly glazed.

"Isabel, stop looking at her like you've never seen a pregnant woman before," Maria finally snaps. She rolls her eyes at Liz.

"It's okay," Liz says softly. "I know it's kind of weird."

"I'm sorry," Isabel insists, after shaking her head firmly. She stares at Liz, hard. "But, Liz, you need to tell me. And you need to be honest. Are you guys really ready for this? On top of everything?"

Liz takes a step back, sighing. She knows that Isabel needs convincing, but she does not quite know where to start. Because, in the end, it is not ridiculous for Isabel to believe that the last thing she and Max need right now is the responsibility for another life.

They do not understand that it is waiting for this child which is helping them to rebuild the lives that were lost for so long.

They stay in Portland for three months. They spend the time exorcising their demons, being in silent accord that, before they make any decisions about what is to come, they need to confront and accept the past. They know that they can not forget it, but they also do not want it haunting them into the future.

Later, when they look back on Portland, it is not always fondly. It is a difficult time, but it is also a necessary time. Liz mourns Zan there, while Max struggles to eliminate Pierce from his dreams. Eventually they learn that the mourning will not end and the nightmares will endure. But, after Portland, they know that together they can survive both.

Portland is not all dark. Every night they talk into the small hours. They yearn to know each other again, only to discover that neither has really changed. They are older, but they are also the same. They have both lived apart from real life during their separation. Liz's amnesia was a sort of captivity, while Max never grew up, and so never became who he is meant to be. Because of it, in many ways, they are the same Max and Liz - the Max and Liz who jumped off a bridge and lived to tell of it. It is five years later, they are five years older, but they are still the same.

But, they also realize that they are no longer sixteen years old. Even though, most days, they both wish they were, they understand that they must grow up fast. They understand that they were both released from their respective prisons for a reason. That reason is not only each other, but also the small being that grows more real every day. They both believe this.

One night, finally, there is no more time for tears. There is no more time for nightmares. Liz wakes in the darkness, her head cradled on Max's chest. She senses that he is also awake. His breathing is erratic, and for a moment she thinks that he has had another nightmare. She is moving to comfort him, when she feels it again. She gasps slightly, and then tears fill her eyes.

"Did you feel that?" she whispers, knowing that he did. It is why he is awake. He has been connected to this child since the very beginning. Now, finally, she too senses the small life moving in her womb. And, finally, it is entirely real.

"Yes," he replies quietly. "God, Liz. It's just...I mean..."

"Amazing," she breathes. She places a hand on her rounded stomach. The pregnancy is only three and a half months along but, because she is small, her middle has not been entirely flat for weeks. She feels the flutter against her hand, and she swallows against the lump in her throat.

She reaches out and takes Max's hand, bringing it against her. His touch is gentle, but she can feel him trembling.

"Are you okay?" she whispers. He has been so wonderful, and is as excited about the baby as she is. She knows this through the connection, but sometimes she worries. After all, in the end, this is not his child and he must feel it at times.

"I'm fine," Max says. "I just...We can't stay here anymore, Liz. We need to get on with our lives."

She knows that he is not just talking about Portland. He is talking about the state of stasis in which they exist. They have both lived through hell, but they are Max and Liz, and they love each other. It is what they know. It is all they need to know. But now it is time to understand how this fundamental fact will shape their future.

"We need to make a life for this baby," Max whispers. He kisses her then. The connection springs to life and she feels just how much he loves this child. He considers the baby a gift - one he never expected, one he never dared hope for, even before the dark days with Pierce.

That night, before falling asleep in each others arms as usual, they make love for the first time. And, in so doing, they take the next step into the future they are fated - destined - to share with each other. But also with their child.

"Okay, we're alone," Maria says. She has pulled Liz into the tiny bathroom. "Now, tell me the truth. How are things, really?"

Liz maneuvers her bulk in the tiny space to seat herself on the toilet seat. "Don't you think Max knows we're talking about him?" she asks wryly. Her husband has returned from his run and is now in the living room with his sister.

"Well, duh," Maria snaps. "But I'm not rude enough to do it in front of him. I am, however, rude enough to demand some answers. Emails and phone calls are all well and good, Liz, but I need some face time."

Liz smiles slightly. "I'm so glad you're here, Maria."

Maria eyes her for a moment. "Even though you told us not to come?"

"I'm glad you came," Liz repeats.

Maria reaches forward and hugs Liz again. "I'm glad you're you, Liz." Liz hears the tears in her best friend's voice and she hugs her back, hard.

"I know that was hard for you," she says quietly. "Me not knowing you."

"Not as hard as it was for you. And I wouldn't have cared if you had stayed that way. You were back. It was enough. But this is better," Maria replies. She pulls back, wiping at her eyes. "God! I'm tired of crying. Liz, seeing you is a good thing. Why am I always crying?"

"Crying's healthy," Liz says. "Everyone's been through a lot."

"Not as much as you two have," Maria argues. "And you're both so strong. I don't know how you can be doing this." She gestures down at Liz's burgeoning belly. "I mean, on top of everything else. What were you two thinking?" She pauses, grimacing. "Well, I know what you were thinking. But, are you sure this is a good idea? How can you bring a baby into this mess?"

Liz swallows, then brings her hand to rest gently on her stomach. She and Max have not told their friends the truth about the baby. They have not discussed it, nor has Max asked her not to, but they have not told anyone.

Of course, Lonnie, and Ava, and Rath all know. Liz is aware that it is not really fair that the others do not, because there is no question that Zan's siblings will play a part in this child's life. The others need to be apprised of the truth of the situation.

No, there is no question that Zan's brother and sisters will play a part, Liz reflects, still grateful that this is so.

And, so, because they will know soon enough anyway, she says, "Maria, there's something I need to tell you..."

It is early morning and so, when Max answers the door, he is drinking coffee. It is the shattering of the cup against the hard wood floor that brings Liz racing out of their bedroom. The sound has made Liz's heart enter her throat. For one horrible instant she envisions the Special Unit invading their new sanctuary, but when she hears the voice, she feels tears fill her eyes instead.

"I came because Lonnie and Rath...they thought it might be too hard for you," Ava says after she is seated at the small kitchen table. She is looking at Max. "I'm sorry I scared ya. But it had to be me. We heard that you haven't seen Isabel or Michael yet."

"It's okay," Max says calmly. Too calmly. Liz sits beside him. She takes his hand under the table. She knows that it is hard for him to see Ava too. After all, he and Tess were not exactly on the best of terms the last time he saw her. Max does not really know Tess at all, just remembers how she tried to trick him into loving her. But she is still a part of who he is, and he does want to see her eventually. Liz is sure that he did not expect that he would see her, but as Ava first.

"We asked them to stay away," Liz continues, squeezing Max's hand. "Just until we're settled. To make sure that we're off the Special Unit's radar."

"Figured as much," Ava says. She pauses, glancing down at the table-top. "Listen, we just wanted to let you know...we're not going to interfere or nothin'."

Liz glances at Max. He nods slightly, which prompts her to ask gently, "What do you mean? We've talked about it and we both want you to be a part of the baby's life."

Ava swallows, looking up. Liz watches her eyes run over Max's face, then become glued to the table again. "We want to, but..."

"I know it's hard," Max says quietly. "I know it's hard for you to look at me. I know what he did for me, Ava. I hope you all know that I'm not trying to take his place. I don't want Liz - or this baby - to forget about him."

Ava raises her head and meets his eyes. "Thanks. It means a lot." Then she blurts, "It was hard for him. Knowing that he was just taking your place. But he accepted it," she adds hastily.

"It wasn't totally like that, Ava," Liz says. "I loved Zan, too."

"I know," Ava replies. "I wasn't saying nothing." She is getting upset, so her careful grammar is suffering. Liz feels a pang of affection for her friend. This can not be allowed to happen. They can not just let Ava, and Rath, and Lonnie walk away. Ava continues, "It don't matter none anyway. He's gone. We need to move on. It's dangerous for us to all be around the kid. We know that."

"We'll figure something out," Max insists firmly. "Because of what Zan did, we have the freedom to do that."

"Because of what Zan did, we can't risk it," Ava replies softly. "But we want you to know that we trust you to love this baby. Zan trusted you, so we do too. And we'll always keep our eyes and ears open, to make sure that everything's okay."

Liz swallows, trying to get rid of the lump in her throat. "Ava, this isn't what we want. It's not right."

"It's not," Max agrees. "This baby needs all of us. Including you three. Everything that has happened, has happened for a reason. We can't afford to screw this up now." He frowns. "We can't let you bow out."

Ava is staring at Max, as though she has seen a ghost. "Man, you really are like him, aren't you?" she finally mutters, but she sounds slightly amused. Liz can tell that Ava is moving past the hardest stages of grief, into the period when memories of the missed love one become bittersweet, instead of painful.

"I'm not him," Max reminds her. "But I know what he would have wanted. And you three disappearing from our baby's life is not it."

Ava stays for the rest of the day and, by the end of it, they have convinced her. She leaves, agreeing to return with Lonnie and Rath in time for the birth.

Liz is happy, knowing that all the pieces of the large puzzle that will comprise her beloved baby's future are falling into place.