A/N: YES!! I AM BACK 4 MY TRIUMPHANT RETURN!!!!!!!! WAH HA HA HA HA HAAA!!!!! more of this story will follow, as long as u review!!
-------------------------now on with the story!----------------------
"Professor, I'm so glad you're back!" Hermione gushed when she, Harry, and Ron ran into Defense Against the Dark Arts. "I thought we'd never see you again."
"So kind of you to say that, Granger," Zelda said with a smile. "I'm glad we came back, too. Good morning, Harry, Ron."
"Hi," they said, both smiling but not able to think of anything to say.
"Tonks was interesting, but she wasn't you," Hermione said. Then a throng of students suddenly billowed into the room, knocking the previously mentioned teens into the wall.
"Where was it Dumbledore said they'd been?" Ron asked.
"On their honeymoon, stupid," Hermione answered. "They were planning on coming back earlier, but they just stayed a tad longer than they'd meant to ....ahhh, how romantic!" She sighed loudly, then added, "So they got Tonks and Trelawny to hold their places 'till they got back."
"Ah."
"Good afternoon, class," Zelda greeted them. "As the Headmaster so kindly told you this morning, I have, erm .... obviously returned."
"Congratulations on your honeymoon, Professor Harkini--um...." started Lavender.
"Please, still call me Harkinian," Zelda laughed. "Koke is such an ugly last name, if you ask me, and I really prefer to keep my own name."
"Okay!"
Zelda went on to take attendance, and when every student was marked present, she set down the list and took out a wand. "Okay.... today I am going to start teaching you about, eh ..... well, actually I'm going to tell you a story."
"A story?" Ron asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Yes, Weasley, a story," Zelda confirmed. "Once upon a time, in a palace far, far, away, there lived a Princess."
Ron, Harry, and Hermione exchanged grins.
"This Princess led a very boring life," Zelda continued, sitting on her desk. "Until one day adventure came knocking rudely on her door. After that day, things were never quite the same. She was kidnapped by a rather evil person who wanted possession of some of her royal ..... things. He would stop at nothing, and would kill to get his hands on anything."
"With all due respect, Professor," said Neville, "how is this relevant to Defense Against the Dark Arts."
"Ehhh...oh, that's the class I'm teaching, isn't it?" Zelda asked dazedly.
"Er, yes," Neville answered.
Suddenly, Zelda took a thick book and banged herself on the head with it. "Phew! Sorry about that, class, I just had a very strange.... moment there."
They stared blankly at her.
"Heh heh, heh ....heh." Zelda cleared her throat loudly. "But actually, now that I think about it, that story does have revelance to what I am planning on teaching you today. Put away the wands."
The class groaned as they pocketed wands and began to take out textbooks.
"No, no books, either," Zelda said. The students curiously put back their books and looked at her. She walked around to the front of her desk and opened a drawer. She calmly picked something up, then wielded it in front of the class. "HI-YAAA!!!"
Ron skidded back in his chair as Zelda approached him with a sword in hand. "P-Professor?!"
"Yes, Weasley?" she asked casually.
"W-what are you doing with that thing?" Ron asked her.
"Professor Dumbledore decided it's time you lot learned other methods of defense," Zelda announced. "Meaning, devices other than wands."
"But why would we need to know that?" a Hufflepuff in the back asked.
Zelda stared at them, then turned to Harry. "As some students here know, it is very possible for one to lose their wand in a duel. And what, may I ask, would you do without it if you had not alternative?"
"Fair question," Hermione whispered.
"As Potter could tell you, a sword can come quite in handy," Zelda said, staring directly at Harry. "At least, that's what I hear from the Headmaster."
"Yeah!" Ron said. "Harry killed a Basilisk with a sword when he was only in his second year!!"
The class applauded loudly and Harry glared at Ron.
"Longbottom," Zelda said, turning to Neville. "Come up here." Nervously, Neville walked to the front of the classroom. "Here," she said, handing the sword to him. He crashed to the floor with its weight. The class laughed as Zelda helped him stand up.
"H-how much does that thing weigh?" Neville asked.
"Oh, it's pretty heavy, don't worry your head about the exact weight," Zelda said lightly, easily picking up the sword.
"So are you going to teach us how to use that?" asked Lavender.
"Yes," Zelda answered.
The class broke out into appreciative whoops and cheers. Suddenly, Zelda's heart sank. 'Link really should be teaching this class, not me,' she thought to herself. 'This is so stupid--I can't believe he's up there doing Divination and I'm down here doing Defense Against The Dark Arts! With a SWORD, no less!! I guess I'll have to ask him for a couple of tips.'
"Professor, would a sword really help us in defeating ... Y-you-Know Who?" Neville asked tentatively.
"Ehh, probably not," Zelda said doubtfully. "However, as Ron so kindly pointed out--thank you, Ron--the Dark Lord is not the only thing you should fear. If you had somehow found yourself without a wand, facing a basilisk, or a dragon, or a giant spider, what would you do? Would you have any more luck surviving that as you would VOLDemort?"
The class shuddered at the mention of his name. Neville, who had turned pale, said, "Does this mean we should carry a sword on us at all times?"
"Hmmm, good point," Zelda said. "No, I don't you should lug about such a weapon all the time, Longbottom. But one never knows when you might be in an ancient castle, or tomb, or somewhere else containing useful swords."
"But what do we do if there aren't any swords around?" Lavender asked.
"Then for heaven's sakes, you've lost all hope," Zelda answered bitterly. "Now if you would all stop interefering with my lesson, maybe I could teach you a thing or two!! No questions, and do not speak unless spoken to. By me."
After a moment of silence, Zelda lifted the sword again, and proceeded to make several fancy movements with it.
"Do you think we'll learn how to conjure swords with wands?" Ron asked, as they walked to dinner.
"What's the point, if you're wand's gone missing?" Hermione asked.
"I dunno," Ron mumbled. "Maybe if you reckon you're going to be in danger and may be losing your wand, you'd want to make a sword appear..."
"Ron, if you keep on thinking like this you'll give yourself a headache," Harry said. Hermione giggled, Ron only looked grumpy. Then the three of them came to a halt, hearing two familiar voices come from around the corner.
"Zelda, really--where did the sword idea come from?"
"I told you, Link, it wasn't MY idea--Dumbledore suggested it."
"WHY?!"
"Because..." Zelda looked around them to make sure there were no students in the hallway. She continued in a very quiet whisper, causing Harry, Hermione and Royn to have to lean closer to the end of the corner to hear. "He knows that Ganondorf is impervious to magic. At least, wand magic. And you never know, with Ganon. He could be here right now, and we wouldn't know it. The students need a way to protect themselves other than wands--what if one of them saw him before we did?"
There was silence for a moment. "I guess that's a good idea," Link muttered, running a hand through his hair. "Well, c'mon, let's get to the Great Hall."
"Okay, but it's in the opposite direction of where we're going, you know."
"Oh. .....right, I knew that."
Harry waited until the sound of their footsteps died away. Then he turned to his two shaken friends. "Ganondorf?!"
"Wasn't...wasn't he that guy who was helping You-Know-Who last year?" Ron asked, turning a white-ish color.
"Yeah," Hermione said, her eyes wide. Slowly, they turned their corner and made their way to the Great Hall. "I remember Snape almost got him, but then he went through a portal or something..."
"Well, whatever's going on, we'd better pay close attention in Defense Against The Dark Arts for the next few lessons," Ron said. "But maybe you could give us a few pointers, eh?"
"Who, me?" Harry asked.
"No, Hermione," Ron said sarcastically, rolling his eyes. "But as I said, you killed a basilisk in your second year, mate!"
"Yeah, I guess I could show you a thing or two," Harry said in mock bravery, puffing out his chest. His friends laughed, and they took a seat at the Gryffindor table. "Hello, Ginny."
"Hi, Harry," she said distractedly.
"Is something wrong?"
Ginny glanced at him. "Look at the staff table."
Harry did, and then was bewildered. How could he have missed it before? "Where --where's Hagrid?!"
"Hey, where IS Hagrid?!" Hermione asked as well, standing up to see if perhaps he was hiding under the Staff table or something.
"Dumbledore looks worried about something," Ron whispered.
"Say, where's your Giant friend?" Malfoy asked, walking past them. "The Ravenclaws say he didn't show up for classes today. Do you think he ran away?"
"Stuff it, Malfoy," Harry sighed, not at all in the mood to argue.
Smirking, Malfoy walked back to the Slytherin table. Hermione watched him, grimacing. "That stinking git," she muttered. "I swear, if he doesn't have something to do with this, I'll eat my wand."
"Watch it, Hermione," Ron said. "I think Dumbledore would've let us know somehow if the Malfoys had done something to hurt Hagrid."
"But that smug tone of voice--"
"Hermione, he always has that smug tone of voice," Harry pointed out flatly.
"True."
-------------Meanwhile, Hagrid's In Trouble------------
"What're ya doin'?!" Hagrid yelled, as several Hylian knights closed in on him.
"Don't worry," Impa said loudly. "We won't hurt you, we just want to help you."
"Sure, yer gonna help me with them spears!"
"Okay, fine, we'll cut to the chase!" Impa barked. "What're you doing in Hyrule?!"
"Where?" Hagrid asked.
"HYRULE!! That's where you are, and you must be for a reason, and we want to know what it is!"
Hagrid looked down at them all stupidly for a moment, then narrowed his eyes. He wagged a finger at Impa. "Yer not related ter the Malfoys, are yeh?"
"The--the what?!" Impa asked in confusion. "Listen, giant--"
"I don't know how I got here!" Hagrid howled. "There was this girl with red hair, and then a man with weird, green skin, an' he opened up a--a blue thing, and I just--"
"Ganondorf!" Impa gasped. She signaled the men to lower their weapons. "That girl you saw must've been Malon! GIANT, IS THE GIRL ALL RIGHT?"
"She seemed all righ' ter me," Hagrid said, still very confused. "But I don't know how I got here..."
"A portal," Impa whispered. "This means you're stuck here until Ganondorf comes back, or until I can correctly summon a portal to your home." She held out a hand. "I'm Impa."
"Call me Hagrid," said the half-giant, taking her hand squeezing it.
Impa withdrew it, shaking it in pain. "That's quite a grip you've got there, giant. But I guess you would have one, wouldn't you?"
"Actually, I'm only half-giant," Hagrid said.
"I wondered. You're a bit smaller than the rest."
"Um, Impa, could I speak with you for a moment?" asked the head knight.
"What is it?"
He pulled her a bit away, so that Hagrid was out of earshot. "Impa, not to be rude, but have you lost your mind??"
"No," Impa said coldly, jerking her arm out of his grasp. "But what do you suggest we do? We cannot turn him loose, for he has no place to go, and we cannot send him back, either. We couldn't create a portal for him and even if we could, we don't know where he lives. Noting that fact, we cannot send him home."
The knight looked rather annoyed, then turned away. "I suppose you're right."
"Of course I'm right. I'm Impa. And don't you ever forget it."
"Okay..."
-----------Back At Hogwarts----------
"We have to speak to Dumbledore," Harry concluded, slamming his fist onto the table roughly.
"Yeah, after dinner, though," Ron said.
"Ron, this is no time to be thinking about your stomach!" Hermione reprimanded him sharply.
"Well, I mean he's eating," Ron continued. "Teachers probably don't like being disturbed while eating."
"Where's Hagrid?" Zelda asked, up at the Staff table.
"I don't know," Link said. "I haven't seen him all day."
"This whole situation is just getting incredible," Zelda moaned, putting her face in her hands. "Do you think he might've run into something nasty in the Forbidden Forest?"
"No. Hagrid could handle anything in there."
"Yeah..."
----------IN the Forbidden Forest-------------
"Do you have a plan yet, Voldemort?" Ganondorf sighed, watching Malon pace back and forth.
"Yes, I do," he answered. "I think I'll go to the castle, find out what that giant did there. Maybe I could take over his position."
"Oh, I'm sure they won't be curious at all as to how their fellow employee just suddenly disappeared," Ganondorf said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "You can't just waltz in there and expect to get a job right aw--"
"I'm not, I'll take my time!" Voldemort hissed. "Don't worry..."
-------------------yah---------------
A/N: good? sucky? plz tell me! part of me wants 2 keep writing this!
