Title: Divine Damnation

Author: DhampyrX2

Rating: PG-13 for language and supernatural violence

Summary: Yet another secret origins of Xander fic that my twisted little brain cooked up.

Timeframe: Post Season 7

Disclaimer: I own nothing. I do this for fun. Please don't sue me.


Mara left trough Xander's Cd player after a good two hours of laughing and catching up with him. Once she did, however, his new cell phone went off. So it was that Xander looked deeply into his mirror, combing his hair, as he talked absently on his demonic-issue cell phone.

"Yes, mom. Hey, you're the one who gave me this assignment. No, I'm not talking back to you. Take what tone? Aww, c'mon, you'd think you didn't trust me with the way you're going. No, I'm not attacking you. Look, I can't visit you because I have to stay here. And what if someone saw me teleport away? Buffy is supposedly watching me like a hawk because she doesn't trust me. Okay, A.) she doesn't know I'm a demon, so explaining I how have to teleport to visit my mother would make no sense to her and B.) if she knew where I live, she'd think I set the whole mess from the last seven years up to hurt her precious Angel...like she'd believe he went to a Hell we have no jurisdiction over. She thinks was too small to comprehend the actual number of heaven and Hell dimensions. She is only mortal after all. I mean, she though that limbo I went to alot a trouble to help Willow pull her out of was Heaven for goodness sake! Yeah, it is kind of funny, I guess. Look, I have to go, it's time for dinner and I have to figure out how to manage all this. Yes, I'm eating properly. Of course I'm drinking enough, it's not like I'm using alot of pishogue here. ...Of COURSE I've got clean underwear on. I'm not some kind of pig that...MOM! I was five then! Can't you let that go? sigh Yeah, and you'll always be my mom. Well, if you want, maybe some of your chocolate chip cookies that you used to bake? Yes I'll share with Urd, Bell, and Skuld when they visit. Alright. It was nice to hear from you directly. I love you, too. Bye." Xander conversed, before hanging up the phone and putting it in his pocket.

He took a long look at his overall appearance before he recited, "To let them feel things are still the norm, return the look of my mortal form."

With a flash of light, Xander suddenly appeared to be as he was the previous morning, complete with eye patch in place. It was really just a more advanced version of his concealing spell, and was still not fool proof, but it would hopefully do for now.

He was cut off from his worried contemplations by a knock at the door. As he opened it, the Nifelheim agent was somewhat surprised to see Robin Wood standing in his doorway. He moved aside to let the man in, a little puzzled by his visit. "What can I do for you, Robin?" he asked.

The former Sunnydale high principal sighed a little before he responded, "I'm shipping off tomorrow afternoon for Africa, and I wanted to let you know."

Xander's face grew wistful, and a little bitter as he replied, "Thanks. I guess. You...you will take good care of them, right?"

Robin looked at the floor, feeling a bit awkward as he replied, "Yeah. Yeah I will." After a pause, he added, "Look, Xander, I'm sorry it all came to this. You did the right thing, and you shouldn't be punished for it. Just...I wanted you to know that. And I'll do all I can to help your team there. You have my word on that."

Xander gave a much more sincere and heartfelt "Thanks." at those words. "Good luck with them Robin. And remember the first rule of Slaying. Don't die." Xander said reaching out o shake the man's hand.

"Yeah. I'm sure the girls you trained will remember that. Reports have it you taught them all to fight dirty." robin said with a grin.

"Vampires aren't going to fight fair. Why should the people hunting them? Buff never did get that lesson." Xander answered with a small grin of his own.

"Yes, well at least she didn't threaten to feed you to Angel the way she did to me with Spike." Robin retorted, rolling his eyes.

Xander snorted as he replied, "She knows I know how to fight dirty. On the off chance he actually beat me to the point he could bite me in Sunnydale, the last thing Deadboy would have felt was the grenade I kept in my jacket going off before he was blown to bits. Any vamp that offed me was coming along for the ride."

"Good policy. You still following it?" Robin asked.

"Nah. I have more destructive ways to deal with vampires now." Xander replied with an enigmatic grin.

Robin raised his left brow at that answer but did not query any further on the subject. "Well, I should get going. I have to finish packing. You going to be alright, Harris?"

It was to the demon's credit that he didn't flinch at the mortal last name as he replied, "Yeah. I'll deal. It's not the first time Buffy and I butted heard over Captain Hairgel. I can handle it."

"You know, for all that she's miss up for Angel, Faith agreed with you on this too. She's just..." Robin began to say.

"Not sure how to talk to me after trying to kill me when I haven't even treated her like I was mad. I kind of noticed that she avoids me now, and Dawn helped fill in why once. Tell her it's cool." Xander interrupted with s smile.

"Will do." Robin answered, before leaving the room.

Xander let out a little sigh as he muttered, "Well, the first test of the concealment is done. Now if I can just get it to hold well enough to talk to Willow and Giles privately, I might have a chance of doing this with some hope for success." before he left the room and headed to the kitchen to get some dinner.

As Xander was contemplating what to eat, Urd was talking to Belldandy and Skuld in their temple in Nekomi, Japan. Well, she was talking with Belldandy mostly. Skuld was reading Xander's recently released file, now that his contract was complete she had access to it again. She was also emitting a dangerous blue glow often referred to as a battle aura and growling angrily to herself.
"So Alex-oniichan has to remain in England for now then, Urd?" Bell's peaceful and cheery voice asked.

"Yeah. Father and Mom worked together to set him up with this one, I think. It's real top level priority stuff, but he is a class one, so he can handle it. At least he's unsealed." Urd replied with a shrug as she drank straight form a bottle of sake.

"And he's one of the few powerful demons Hild-sama can actually trust." Belldandy added as she sipped her tea.

Urd nodded in agreement, trying to ignore Skuld angry muttering about bleached bimbos, debugging mallets, and additions to Banpai to go after necrophiliacs in the background as she continued to speak with the elder of her two younger sisters. "Yeah, it's pretty much Alex or Mara for stuff this important, and having Alex there, with visitation actually allowed, pretty much insures Mara's presence too."

"Oh My! Has she actually admitted that..." Bell began to ask.

"That she's got a huge crush on my baby brother? Not that I've seen. Of course I try not to speak to the backstabbing tramp much these days, and Alex can do so much better." Urd interjected with a chuckle.

"Peroth and Venus will be thrilled to hear that, old hag." Skuld tossed over her shoulder, never taking her eyes off her computer screen. Finally she growled angrily and stood up. "That's it! I'm gonna neo-Skuld bomb those worthless mortals back into the stone age! Nobody treats my big brother like this. I don't care if he /is/ a demon!" she snapped.

Urd looked over curiously at the screen to see what was Skuld's last straw, and saw a continuous loop of that Buffy girl doing a dance that almost classified as a strip tease with Xander, just to make her pet vampire jealous. She half toyed with the idea of letting Skuld go after the eldest Slayer, it upset her too after all, before she finally spoke up. "Maybe you should hold off on that and just plan for a visit instead, runt."

"What?!? How can you just let this go, Urd? she's a horrible person, and she's supposed to be a champion. We, as goddesses, have a right...no a duty, to punish her for going off the path." Skuld cried in indignation, as she took up her mallet and swung it dramatically.

"And even unsealed, he's on a complex job that benefits both sides here on Midgard that could be jeopardized by you smiting mortals left and right without restraint." Urd snapped in reply.

"Don't you even care how those humans treat him?" Skuld snapped back incredulously.

"Of COURSE I DO! He's my brother too, ya know. But this is delicate. Besides we can't do lasting harm to mortal unless provoked, or I'd have nuked the little Slayer by now!" Urd spat angrily.

Belldandy cleared her throat politely then, making both her elder and younger sister back down a bit. "Urd is right, Skuld. We can't go causing trouble for oniichan while he's working. We promised a long time ago to try not to hurt each other's work unless ordered to do so, remember. And you know that promises are binding for us."

Skuld put her mallet down and nodded sullenly as she replied, "Okay, Bell. I guess you're right. I still don't like it, though."

"We can still visit him, though. We can call ahead, and maybe we can ever have a picnic together, just like when we were younger. Doesn't that sound nice?" Belldandy responded with a bright smile.

Urd let out a small laugh as she added, "And you can bring Keiichi, sis. He hasn't got a chance to meet Alex, yet."

Bell actually looked a little worried as she replied, "Oh my, I hadn't thought of that. I do hope they get along."

"Ah, Kei as good to you as good gets. Alex seemed to warm up to him a bit just from me describing him. They'll get along fine. Kei will just have to endure the 'Talk' from the squirt. That's all." Urd responded with a reassuring grin.

All three sisters smiled a bit at Xander's 'talks' with any of Urd's or Bell's former suitors. More than one high powered god had run for their lives rather than face and angry class 1 demon for a protective brother. Of course, when the talk starts with, "You know, there's so much room between death and pain, I don't really find the Doublet System restrictive at all. It just encourages you to get creative, don't you agree?", then they have a reason to get scared.


As the Norns imagined just how frightened Keiichi would soon be, Xander was in the process of finishing a sandwich in the kitchen. He had just put the mayo away, when he heard a voice from behind him say, "Xander, can I talk to you for a minute?"

The demon-kami hybrid let out a little sigh before he stood to face the speaker. As he turned around, he thought to himself, time for test number two of for my concealing spell. I hope it holds...

END PART 4