One Thing Led To Another
Author: Siren of Hell
Beta: The Goddess of the Void
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I own nothing! I'm just manipulating the characters so they do as I want! Dance my puppets, dance!
Summary: Denial much? Harry's in major denial, methinks!
Pairings: H/D
Warning Slash
Dedication: I've decided that dedications are stupid and that I shan't do them till I know more people!
One thing led to another.
I know what it means, but what does it really mean? How can one thing lead to another? There must be a motive, a reason for that one thing leading to another. One thing can't just lead to another. It's emotionally impossible, not to mention, in my opinion, incredibly stupid.
Hypothetically, let's say that Draco and I met in a corridor one lazy Sunday afternoon. We were both on our own, hypothetical as this situation is, may I remind you. Words were exchanged... OK, words is a little tame for what was exchanged, a barrage of spiteful insults and hurtful jibes is more like it. And while we were in a giving mood, fists were exchanged as well. So (still hypothetically remember) we're fighting, bloodied fists, manly urges for killing and all, and one thing led to another... And we ended up kissing. I mean like hard, passionate, rough and amazingly pleasurable kissing. Hypothetically speaking, of course...
Yet here's what I don't understand. How could one thing lead to another?!? For one, I am so totally and completely not gay! Draco on the other hand... But that's beside the point! It still does not placate my mind on how one thing led to another. It's impossible! Completely and totally impossible!
So I came to the conclusion that it was a spell. Definitely a spell, a dark evil spell! Because I know, for a fact, that I am in no way attracted to Draco Bloody Malfoy. No way, no how. Nuh-uh. Definitely not... and how about... NO!
So, we're still in hypothetical mode, right? Monday evening, after my Quidditch practice, I, of course being the hero and good-natured boy that I am, confronted Draco on his abuse of dark magic.
And you know what? He had the audacity to deny it!
Can you honestly believe that? He denied that it was a dark spell! Unbelievable, incorrigible!
In my father's day, evil still had honour, but now-a-days evil just ain't the same! Draco bloody Malfoy! Who the hell did he think he was?
His denial ultimately led to another argument, another fist fight, though bar brawl could possibly be a more apt description. However!!! Yet again, one thing led to another and before I knew it we were on the floor, and not in the good 'I just pounced on you to bash your face in' kind of way! Draco's tongue was down my throat, and I knew, somewhere in the deep dark recesses of my brain that this was wrong! But my other, slightly less capable brain had taken over! And, yes, one thing led to another and my clothes were gone (small note to anyone thinking this is a good idea - it's not! Castle floors are bloody cold! Too bloody cold to be naked on them! Find a bed and get your brain out of the gutter... or off the floor!)
So let's review; I'm naked and sweaty, rolling round on a freezing cold stone floor with an equally naked and sweaty Draco bloody Malfoy! This is not looking good for our heroin... hero! Not gay! Not gay!
And one thing led to another and his (deliciously large, beautifully hard and perfect) cock was pumping in and out of my well-oiled behind!
Does this seem wrong to you too?
Let's skip the (hypothetical) awkwardness that came after our first fuck. Yes, you will notice that I said first fuck, meaning that it was the first of many. I still claim I was under the influence of a dark potion (I forgot to ask him about potions when I confronted him about dark spells, damnit!), and plead total innocence to our mad fucking spree.
What happened once, became twice, became three times a week. And one thing led to another and Draco eventually outed me (I still maintain that I am not gay!) in the middle of breakfast on a Wednesday morning. There was nothing particularly special about this Wednesday, nothing unusual. But I do remember an odd sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach when I finally dragged myself away from our cosy love nest (an empty class room in the third floor corridor) in the early hours of that particular morning. I seem to remember Draco looking even more cute than usual as he snuggled down in the blankets, his naked chest still glistening with oil that we had used, for purposes other than hypothetical sex, the previous evening. Back to the event at breakfast. I had arrived early; still juiced from activities I'd rather not name that took place the night before. Bleary-eyed students had slowly filtered in, taking their usual places.
The Slytherin Prince arrived later than usual, looking quite please with himself. Instead of slinking off to the Slytherin table he made his way straight towards me, smirk evident on his gorgeous, smug as hell, face. I shrunk in my seat, my eyes widening in terror. As soon as he had reached me he had pulled me to my feet, stared me straight in the eye and, very loudly, proclaimed his love for me! He, then, bent me over one of his arms and gave me the most passionate kiss I have ever experienced in my entire life. (I'm now convinced that Draco is actually Sarah Michelle Gellar disguised with polyjuice, because she felt that that was the only way that she could express her undying love to me!)
The great hall was shocked into silence. Snape looked as if he were about to puke (or that his heart, brain, and other important body organs were about to explode...), and Dumbledore had that bloody evil twinkle in his eye! You know the one I'm talking about!
So yet again one thing led to another and we were voted cutest couple of the year in 'Witch Weekly's cutest couple of the year awards'. Spare me from reminiscing about that nightmare.
When seventh year had come to an end, one thing, inevitably (I am now almost willing to say...), led to another and Draco and I wound up living together in a cosy little cottage on the outskirts of London. One thing led to another - and we were married. And that thing led to another, so now I'm as fat as a bloody elephant and am expected to squeeze something the size of a watermelon out of something the size of a sickle!
Did I mention I hate Draco Malfoy?!?
...Did I mention that I love Draco Malfoy?
Did I mention that I'm glad one thing led to another (even though I still maintain that I am not gay!)?
Fin
Please Read and Review! (And for anyone wondering, the next chapter of Suicide Watch is coming!)
