.: Chapter 2 :.
Dib sulked down the sidewalk as he headed towards Zim's house for his routine spy-on-the-stupid-alien session, his head hung low as he watched the concrete pass under his feet. He had happened to pass by Torque's house, and Torque had happened to give Dib a wedgie to complment the smack in the head he had given the outcast that morning. This understandably gave Dib a little less pep then he had when he had left his house, so he didn't notice the flaming ball that fell from out of the sky and down into Zim's neighborhood. He did however, feel the ground shake and hear a large crash, followed shortly by some voice screaming something that sounded pretty nasty. He looked up at the strange sound, and then began to run the rest of the distance to his enemy's base.
"What if that's one of Zim's evil experiments? Or maybe a new alien weapon of extreme destruction?" he said to himself as he ran, "Or even better...what if he blew himself up during one of his evil experiments? Or while trying to operate a new alien weapon of extreme destruction?" Dib's eyes lit up at the thought. He had been thinking a lot lately about Zim randomly combusting for one reason or another. The autopsy fantasies had started to become stale...Zim exploding--maybe even by his own grubby green hands, now THAT was a satisfying thought...Dib's trademark morbid thoughts of Zimmy-death were cut short, however, as the Irken's house came into view. There was nothing there; no wicked experiment gone awry, no charred, flaming alien battle tank, definatly no Zim guts (Damn! Dib thought)...all that could be seen was a large, cracked dent in the pavement, and some scorch marks. It took Dib a minute to notice those however. He was really, really disappointed that he wasn't seeing Zim's corpse strewn about in pieces. When he did finally notice the obvious broken street, he slowly walked over to investigate, carefully checking to make sure the short green monster wasn't around.
"Hmmm...well something happened here. And Zim had to be involved with it. Which means it had to be...not good." He crept up to the house, moving stealthly about to avoid the lawn gnomes. When he was sure the gnomes hadn't picked up his presence, he pulled his camera out of his trenchcoat, and silently peered over the window, eager to catch Zim doing megalomaniacal alien crap of incriminating doom. He could hear two voices inside. His anxious grin fell as soon as it had came to his face. It was only that stupid robot, playing with some stupid dolls. The only unusual thing going on here was a strange crossover of the Crucifixion, The Raven, and the discovery of electricity. The voices had to have been GIR making the figures talk...wait, no...GIR was talking to someone else too! It didn't sound like Zim either. Dib carefully readjusted himself so that he could peek around the edge of the window to see what the robot was talking too. He noticed something come into view. His hands shook in anticipation as he readied the camera. A million thoughts flowed through his head...this had to be it, the proof he needed, by this time tomorrow he would be a hero to the world, just what did an Irken squeedily spooch look like anyway? More importantly, what did it look like on fire?
The last thought made Dib shake himself out of his daze...even he thought that it was weird. He turned his attention back to GIR and his mysterious friend.
"Crap." It was just another robot. This one looked just as dumb as GIR. It had brought a stuffed pig and some muffins. Zim must've made GIR a playmate or something just to get him out of the way. Dib sighed in disappointment. He was just about to turn around and go home for the day when, out of the corner of his eye, he noticed yet another figure come into view. He grabbed for his camera and started to turn back to the window--
BEEP BEEP! BEEP BEEP! "What the--?" Dib looked at his watch. The alarm was going off. "What did I set this so early for? The only reason I set my watch when I go spy on Zim is when I think I'll be late for-- THE MYSTERIOUS MYSTERIES MARATHON!! It's tonight!!" Dib would've stood there in the yard, desperatly trying to decide between evidence of alien life and his favorite TV show, but the gnomes had heard him make his loud realization and were already surrounding him. Dib just sighed and let himself get thrown out, running back to his house the second he hit the sidewalk.
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"What was that?" Q asked as she munched a muffin.
"Oh, you mean that sqeauly noise?" GIR replied, "That's just Dib. He's funny. And he has a big head!"
"Ooooooo..." Q said in awe. Razzmik returned to the living room with a bag of chips and a bowl of popcorn as the robots went back to their game of butchering world history and classic literature.
"You mean there is something in the universe with a head bigger then Zim's?" she sneered. GIR just nodded and continued playing. She sat down on the coach and flipped on the TV. Whatever idiot drivel the box was emitting was lost on the Anti-Invader, though. She found herself deep in thought about what Zim had said earlier. So Zim was another tool of the Empire, eh? He had called himself an Invader...and said he was assigned to this planet Earth...but it just didn't make sense to Razzmik. She had never heard of Earth in her life. Why would the Tallests be interested in a planet located in the middle of nowhere? And Zim...his name sounded familiar...wasn't he the one that had hijacked that mech in Impending Doom 1? Was he really an Invader?
The reason that Razzmik was so doubtful was because she knew every planet that the Empire wanted to conquer and each of those planet's assigned Invaders. Her fellow gang member, Rawkk, had hacked into the Tallests computers and gotten the exact list; she had even watched him do it. (They had laughed for thirty straight minutes when they saw Skoodge was assigned to Blorch) Had she just forgotten? Maybe she had just missed it when ever she had last looked over the list, like when something is written right there in front of you, but it takes you a while to actually see it...but it still didn't make sense. She glanced back at GIR and Q. His SIR unit...Zim had actually called that brainless junk heap 'advanced'. Technology given to him by Tallest Red and Purple themselves. What was going on here? This was really started to bug her. She hopped off the couch and walked to the table that hid one of Zim's secret passages to his underground base.
"Yo, computer thing, open this doo-hicky up. I need to get soemthing out of my ship."
"VOICE COMMAND INVALID! REQUEST DENIED."
"Do it or I'll give you the electronic equivilant to a solid kick in the groin!!"
"YES MA'AM." The passage opened up and Razzmik went down.
"...bitch..."
"I HEARD THAT!!" Razzmik called back up before the hidden door closed. The computer managed a 'gulp' sound.
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Meanwhile Zim was toiling away at his "guest's" totaled Voot Cruiser. It was a mess...the thing was in need of a complete overhaul. Zim grumbled angrily as he hoped that nothing would happended to his own Voot anytime soon. He was going to have to use a lot of his personal spare parts. Maybe he would get the communication working on his computer again soon, then he could call a tow vehicle like Razzmik had suggested earlier. Razzmik. That Irken had a serious attitude problem, not ot mention she looked rather shadey. Zim frowned as he pictured her sneering blood red eyes and how her antennea hung over the front of her face like limp noodles. One of them was even dyed the bright red, just a brighter shade than her eyes. Zim shook away his thoughts on the Irken punk and went back to thinking about his computer...he really needed to get in contact with the Tallest. He decided that he would work on fixing the computer immediatly after skool tomorrow. As soon as his communications were working properly, he would get Razzmik's ship to the professionals (not that the amazing Zim couldn't do something as simple as repair a Voot Crusier...he just had more important things to do!) and then he would make his call to the Tallest.
"How's it coming, grease monkey?" Razzmik said as she walked up to him.
"If you want me to fix this thing, then you had better stop calling me that," Zim replied loudly.
"If you don't want your pak shoved down your throat, then you had better let me call you whatever the hell I want!" she shot back, a deliberatly cheesy grin on her face. Man, she was on a roll tonight! "Outta my way, I need to get something."
"What?" Zim asked with slight intrigue. Razzmik ignored him and dug through the wreckage. After a minute of digging, she popped back out with two things: A small remote type object with the same purple and black flame design as her Voot, and a little handheld computer. The computer looked pretty banged up, but the strange remote only had a few dents in it.
"My baby!" Razzmik exclaimed as she kissed the remote. "Thank goodness you turned out better than this thing!"
"What is it? Huh?" Zim tried to get a look at what it was, but Razzmik only snubbed him and turned away. "C'mon, lemme see! What is it? Tell me!" he even tried to use his spider legs to get a peek.
"Nothing you need to be concerned with. I'll be repairing these myself thank you. You just get my ship working." With that, Razzmik turned and left the room.
"Hmph." Zim said to himself as he turned back to his work. "If she thinks the great Zim is foolish enough to concern himself with her trivial knick knacks of stupid stuff, then she is WRONG! My incredible brain has more important problems to solve! Now then....what the heck is this thing supposed to do?" Looking around to make sure Razzmik was completely gone, he pulled a copy of "The Complete Idiot's Guide to Irken Vehicle Repair" out of his pak.
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A/N: Sorry it is so short. I'll try to make the third chapter longer, and better.
Did you know that there really are action figures of Jesus, Poe, and Franklin? Oh, you did?
...nevermind then.
