Author Note: Warning one swear word in this Chap. I'm dedicating this to Lightning Wolf and my best online mate Jayne Leigh, you're both great!
I got up to leave the office and headed to the canteen at the top of the stairs a voice made me jump:
"Mind if I come with you"
"Of course not" I smiled
"I think I'd die in there with all the death glares I'm getting"
I laughed as we entered reception:
"Robbie this is John Boulton" I said introducing John
"The 'John Boulton'?"
John nodded
"John this is Robbie, self confessed motor mouth"
"That's right, I tell people not to tell me their secrets"
"Then they get angry with you when you let it slip don't they Rob?"
Robbie blushed furiously as we disappeared into the maze of corridors
"She's all right is Rob, just a bit loose lipped" I explained to John just as June Ackland poked her head round her office door:
"Are you all right Claire?"
"Fine thanx June" I replied as we carried on walking.
At the service counter I noticed it was Edna on duty:
"Ah, Claire what can I do for you?"
"Two mugs of strong black coffee please, I don't suppose there's any chance you could do us something hot?" I asked
"Of course, what would you like?"
"What d'you fancy John?"
"Bacon sandwich please"
"Make that two bacon sarnies then please"
"Take a seat I'll bring them over" Edna said
We took our coffee and grabbed a table,
"I'm really sorry about your back" John said
"It's all right, I'm dropping the charge" I told him
"What?!" John exclaimed
I smiled as Edna brought over our bacon sandwiches
"I can't be responsible for ruining your career"
"Is this because of our history?" John asked
"I don't know John, I really don't know" I said finishing my sandwich and getting up to leave.
I had only got as far as the canteen door when I heard Tony, June, Matt, Polly, Andrew and Vicky having a go at John:
"You've got some nerve coming back here"
"Yeah especially after what you did to Claire"
I sighed as I headed back to the table:
"For Christ's sake, will you just leave him alone" I glared at Matt "I'd have expected better from you June. Come on John" I turned on my heel and walked out, John following behind like a puppy
"I'm going to get some air, I'll see you back in the office" I said not looking at John.
I left John at the foot of the CID stairs as I made my way outside; I sat on the wall outside the station as I tried to make sense of my thoughts. I heard Kerry yell at John:
"Where's Claire? What the hell have you done to her?"
"She's outside getting some air" John yelled back
Look out the fucking window and you'll see me I thought angrily.
I watched the cars flash by as I tried to make sense of my thoughts and feelings, was I doing the right thing dropping the assault charge? Was I doing it because I still loved John?
For the first time in my life I found I couldn't make sense of my thoughts.
I'm confused, I loved John before he left, then he hurt me and the love turned to hate, but now he's back on the scene I'm still mad at him but I love him.
I want to tell him about his children but I can't it would kill Peter.
I looked at my watch it was almost four in the morning.
A/N: Thank to those who do come back and read this, I know my updating is crap but I do hope to get this sorted very soon. Luv an' hugs xx
