Isn't it odd how you think you're really struggling with something until you actually sit down and try to do it? No? Oh, maybe that's just me then.


Chapter 9

8.03.

How long had they been in there? He wasn't sure. It felt like an eternity, and yet he knew it couldn't have been more than ten minutes. Probably not more than five. Surely it shouldn't take this long? Unless something was wrong. Would they come and get him if something was wrong? He doubted it. Maybe he should go in. Just to check everything was all right.

8.04.

No, he wouldn't go in just yet. There was no reason to think there was anything wrong. They hadn't been that long really. He was just worrying over nothing. He knew that. And he knew he could trust Susan. She would only be angry if he went barging in.

He glanced at the clock again. 8.04.

Why were they taking so long? Something must be wrong. And he knew they wouldn't come and fetch him if it was. He really should go in and check.

Luka shoved down the untouched coffee someone had thrust in his hands, the cold liquid spilling onto paper-cluttered desk. He didn't hear Jerry's angry cries as he strode purposefully across the hall, unconsciously pushing away people who blocked his path. He reached the door and was about to push it open when he felt a sharp jabbing pain in the middle of his back. He cried out, spinning around to confront his attacker. He found himself looking down on an indifferent-looking Dr Weaver.

'What the hell was that for?'

'Don't pretend you didn't hear me.'

'I didn't hear you.'

'You didn't want to hear me Dr Kovac.'

'What do you want Dr Weaver?' Luka asked impatiently, glancing at the door less than a foot away.

'I want you to tell me exactly what you've been doing for the past half an hour,' she snarled. 'You're only up on the board for seeing one patient, and according to Jerry, Susan Lewis has taken over that.'

'She hasn't taken over,' corrected Luka unnecessarily. 'She's just performing a rape exam.'

'That's not the point Dr Kovac. The point is you're not seeing any patients! Now, I have some things to take care of upstairs, and when I get back I want to see evidence that you've been working your ass off!'

And with that she turned on her heel and stormed off, leaving Luka biting back a snide remark about how often she disappeared to 'take care of things'.

'One guess which recently disabled surgeon is the 'things' she needs to take care of,' quipped a tired sounding female voice from over Luka's shoulder.

Luka spun back around, bringing back the dizziness he had forgotten about this past half hour.

'You're done,' said Luka, glancing back at the closed door.

'Yep,' said Susan, answering what she knew wasn't a question.

Luka looked at her expectantly.

'Well?'

'Well, not much. Nothing unexpected anyway. Yes, she was raped . . .'

Luka winced, partly at the word itself, and partly because some part of him had still been hoping it wasn't true.

' . . . But we knew that already,' Susan continued. 'She'll be okay. More cuts and bruises, but nothing that won't heal by itself. She says she was on the pill anyway. She tested negative for HIV but obviously . . . '

Luka couldn't help cringe at hearing Susan speak so matter-of-factly about Kate. He glanced at the closed door, anxious and yet afraid to go in.

' . . . We did recover semen but it won't be any use if she won't press charges.'

Luka had not been hearing Susan but her words drew back his attention.

'What do you mean won't press charges?' Luka demanded.

'I mean, she says she doesn't want to speak to the police.'

Luka sighed, frustrated. Once again he found himself staring at the closed door. Susan may be telling him Kate was okay, but he felt a strong need to see it for himself.

'Look, maybe you should talk to her Luka.'

Luka looked at Susan surprised, having expected her to warn him to stay away from her for a while.

Susan knew what he was thinking. 'I mean, she does appear to be coping, but I seriously doubt that's the case. She didn't respond to me, so if she trusts you then maybe she'll listen to you.'

Luka rolled his eyes. 'Strangely enough, I think she does trust me,' he said, speaking mostly to himself, his voice thick with remorse. 'I don't know why. I certainly haven't given her any reason to.'

Susan chose to ignore the personal revelation, which said a lot more than she suspected Luka had intended to reveal. 'Well, I said I'd check on her in a while, but that she should get some rest. I very much doubt she will.'

Susan walked away leaving Luka standing at the door, very aware that he had no more excuses to put off going in.

So he did.


'I'll be back in a while to check on you, but you should really get some rest,' Susan said gently, de-gloving herself and leaving the room.

Abby raised the bed slightly and shifted the pillows a little. Kate mumbled a bleak thank you and shifted into a half-sitting position with her legs partly curled up underneath her and the sheet pulled around her tightly.

'Do you need anything? Some water? Something to eat?'

Kate shook her head, purposely avoiding Abby's eyes in natural embarrassment at having been examined so personally.

'Do you need to go to the bathroom?'

'No, I'm fine really,' Kate said looking up. The brief eye contact only succeeding in proving exactly the opposite to the experienced Abby.

Abby pulled a stool up to the side of the bed, purposely keeping a short distance so as not to make Kate any more uncomfortable than she clearly all ready was.

'Do you want to talk about it?'

'No.' Her voice was soft but firm.

'Some people find it helps.' Abby coaxed gently. 'Keeping it all in can make it worse.'

With her head turned away and her eyes almost glazed over it wasn't clear if Kate was hearing Abby's words, but Abby continued anyway.

'Did you know your attacker?'

There was a short pause before Kate shook her head slowly, confirming what Abby had already known, that she was listening.

'Would you know him if you saw him again?'

Kate looked up, slightly surprised at the question which she had assumed obvious, and a little wary of where Abby was going with this.

'Yes.'

'Is that why you don't want to talk to the police?' Abby pushed gently. 'Are you afraid you'll have to see him again?'

Once again Kate remained silent, but Abby knew enough to take this as affirmation.

'Kate, I can't promise you that you won't have to see him again, but if you do press charges at least you won't have to constantly be afraid of bumping into him on the street.'

More silence.

'Promise me you'll think about it.'

Kate looked up at Abby through watery eyes and opened her mouth to speak. At that moment a sharp creak caused both women to jump in surprise. They looked up to see an equally bewildered-looking Luka stood awkwardly in the doorway.