Marked

Summary: Complete Fluff. My first attempt at humor. Weir has to stake her claim on Sheppard. Actually not a shipper story.

Spoilers: Everything up to The Storm.

Disclaimer: Stargate Atlantis and its characters do not belong to me.

Author's Note: I saw it and couldn't help writing about it. I'll explain at the end.

"He's what?!" exclaims Dr. Weir incredulously.

"Major Sheppard is being held captive by a group of Amazons," repeats Ford.

"Someone better start explaining," Elizabeth says, wishing she had never gotten up this morning.

"We were headed toward a faint energy signature when we were confronted by a group of women," starts Teyla. "They held primitive, but effective looking weapons. Major Sheppard tried to explain that we meant no harm, but they would address only me."

"So you explained what you were doing there?" asks Weir.

"Yes and they seemed content to let us return to the Stargate," answers Teyla.

"What made them change their minds?"

"They apparently took a liking to Major Sheppard and I," says Ford with a grin. The lieutenant is leaning back in his chair, looking very pleased with himself. The grin dies quickly under Elizabeth's glare.

"As I was saying," continues Teyla. "They were about to let us leave when they noticed that the men were not marked."

"Marked?"

"Yes. They showed us one of their men who had a mark, a brand, on his tunic. This is apparently how they claim ownership over their men. I was only able to lay claim to Lt. Ford."

"Don't get me wrong," says Elizabeth, looking at Ford, then back at Teyla. "But why did you choose Ford over Sheppard?"

"Because Lt. Ford had an easily identifiable mark," respond Teyla.

Ford takes off his ever-present cap, turns it around, and places it on the table in front of Weir. Stitched on the back is the Nike swoosh.

"Ah. I see. Sheppard doesn't have any markings because we remove our patches during missions." Elizabeth sighs. She knows she can't really blame him for this, but only Sheppard could get in trouble for not wearing a damn patch.

"And where were you during all of this?" Elizabeth glances at McKay who is sitting at the end of table looking very amused.

"I twisted my ankle," he says pointing to the foot he has up on a chair. "I couldn't walk, so I stayed by the Stargate."

"You tripped on the Stargate," clarifies Ford.

"Which is lucky or we'd have two hostages instead of just one." Silence follows Rodney's comment. He looks around at the three amused faces. "What?"

Elizabeth clears her throat and fights back a grin. "So where is he now?"

"Mara," says Teyla, "the leader of the tribe, is holding him until his rightful owner comes forward."

"I guess that's me, then." Dr. Weir stands, followed by Ford and Teyla.

"I'll just stay here and get Beckett to look at my ankle." McKay doesn't move from his chair.

"Right," says Ford with a mock look of concern. "Wouldn't want the Amazons to try and claim you, too."

The three leave the conference room before Rodney can retort.

It's not until they are back on the planet, headed toward the Amazon camp, that something occurs to Teyla.

"Dr. Weir?" she asks. "How do you plan on claiming Major Sheppard when he has no markings on his clothing?"

"Oh," Elizabeth gets a wicked gleam in her eye, "I have an idea."

Dr. Weir turns back to the path and keeps walking. Teyla looks at Ford quizzically. He grins.

"I have a feeling this is gonna be good."

TBC...