A/N: oh no! i feel this story will soon be coming to an end.... sigh. Oh well! Please read this and review it!

-------------------------------

"Rise and shine, people, rise and shine!" Mr. Pendanski said early the next morning, entering D-Tent and clapping his hands loudly. "It's time to wake up!"

"No it's not," mumbled X-Ray, turning over and hugging his pillow tightly.

"I'm afraid it is, son," Mr. Pendanski said. "But if it's any consolation, you don't even have to dig today."

"We don't?" asked Squid, sitting up attentively. Then he frowned. "Man, I must still be dreaming."

"I assure you that this is not a dream," their counselor informed him. "The Warden is giving Tessyboos a going-away party in her cabin, and everyone in D-Tent has been invited. She was going to make invitations, but she ran out of time."

"WOO-HOO!!" Magnet shouted exuberantly, jumping out of bed. "Hallelujah, no diggin today!"

"No digging?" yawned Dude from the other side of the tent. "What's the occasion? Or is the Warden just feeling uncharacteristically nice?"

"Tessyboos is getting a going-away party!" Armpit screamed at them with much excitement. "WE LOVE YOU, TESSYBOOS!"

"Who what when where why?" Tessyboos asked, who had just opened her eyes. She blinked, then screamed. "AHH!!! I CAN'T SEE!!! I'VE GONE BLIND!!"

Eloisha calmly walked over to Tessyboos and pulled a blanket off her eyes. Tessy stopped freaking out, looked around, then said, "Thanks."

"Dude, that was so unfunny," Starfish said.

"What was?" asked Dude. "What'd I do?"

"Nothing," sighed Starfish. "That's getting old! I was talking to Sawyerzelda!"

St. No-No gasped. "It starts..."

"What starts?" asked Hammer.

"Obviously, Sawyerzelda suffers from lack of inspiration," St. No-No said quite matter-of-factly. "This having been said, she is having trouble writing. This also having been said, the humor is getting more and more lame."

Sawyerzelda was bugged by how well St. No-No knew her.

Mr. Pendanski crossed over to the girls side of the tent. "C'mon now, ladies. The warden wants you to eat breakfast, then make a beeline for her cabin right away. She says she's got something special she wants to show you."

"Special?" Dude asked, rolling her eyes. "That sounds wonderful."

At breakfast.......

"So when're you leaving, Tessyboos?" asked Squid.

"I'm not sure," she answered. "I think sometime soon, like probably in the next chapter. Which, Sawyerzelda told me, will probably be the last."

"What?! The end? SO SOON!?" Zig Zag cried in protest. "That is just pathetic! I am so ashamed!"

"Oh, the author gave it her best shot," sighed X-Ray. "Besides .... when Tessyboos leaves, everything will be boring around here anyway."

"Hey!" protested Hammer. "Are you saying that I am boring, mister?! Because I can tell you that I'm NOT! We had some good random times before Tessy even came along! No offense meant, Tessyboos."

"None taken. I am on your side. But I am also touched, X."

"No prob."

"I wonder what it is that the Warden wants to show us?" Eloisha asked out loud.

"I don't even care," Ukulele Peanut laughed. "Anything is fine with me if it excuses us from digging .... unless of course she were to show us some movie with Barbra Streisand or something."

"That would be rather evil," Dude commented.

"Yeah, I think I'd rather dig," agreed Zig Zag.

"Let's just hurry up and eat so we can get over there," Magnet said. "You're bothering me with your mindless chatter."

"Aiyaa, so rude!" Eloisha and Dude said at the same time. For whatever reason, they turned towards each other and burst into hysterical laughter.

"Peanut, what have we told you about leaving your sugar around?" Armpit said sternly, pointing an accusing finger at her.

"They didn't get into my sugar, I swear," Ukulele Peanut said. "They just obviously thought it was funny to say the exact same thing at the exact same time. That's all it is, don't get so worked up over it."

"I heart sugar," said Dude. "But I'm not obsessive, and I don't become as freakishly hyper as Ukulele Peanut."

"Point taken," said Zig Zag. "That's good enough for me."

"Okay, well, I'm done," said Eloisha, pushing a full plate away from her and standing up. "Come on, guys. Let's see what the Warden's doing for Tessyboos' going away party."

"Righto, gov'ner," said Squid in a rather odd cockney accent, as he and St. No-No also stood up.

D-Tent marched out of the cafeteria, and out towards the Warden's cabin.

"Tessyboos, you mustn't forget to write us once you're gone," St. No-No said.

"Yes, because if you forget about us, we'll feel rejected," Magnet seconded. "And when rejected, and I shrink back into my sad place."

"Okay then.... I guess we wouldn't want that," said Tessyboos, raising an eyebrow at Magnet. "I'll write to you at least every week."

"Good. That's comforting."

When they all reached the warden's cabin, she was standing there with her hands on her hips, and tapping her foot impatiently. "Yeesh, what took you so long?" she demanded. "Do you need five hours to eat breakfast?"

"Um, correction--we were only in the cafeteria for ten minutes," Armpit pointed out. "And besides, breakfast is the most important meal of the day."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," sighed the warden, ushering them all into her cabin. "Come on inside."

"WOAH!!" Dude cried. "Party streamers and balloons...?"

"Are you making a celebration out of the fact that I'm moving?!" Tessyboos shouted, extremely hurt.

"Don't be silly," the warden said, waving her hand. "It's just a going-away party, and the balloons and streamers are a reminder of how much we love you and are going to miss you, hon."

"Oh."

"Hey, what's this projector doing here?" asked Starfish, lifting a pile of party fuzz off of a .... film projector. "Are we watching a movie?"

"Is Barbra Streisand in it?" Ukulele Peanut asked worriedly.

"Yes; no," said the warden, answering both questions in a row. "I thought we might take this time to reminisce about the olden days. Some from recent times, some from B. T. times."

"What does B. T. stand for?" asked Eloisha.

"Before Tessyboos," answered the Warden. "I was going to save it for the end of the party, but since SOMEONE--" She eyed Starfish darkly "--uncovered the surprise, we might as well do it now. Go on, pull up some chairs."

Everybody did as instructed, and the warden switched off the lights. She sat down on the couch as the test pattern showed up.

"Wait, how do you have footage of us?" asked Hammer.

"Little microscopic cameras that I planted in several different locations," she answered in a rather nonchalant tone.

"I told you she had those hidden everywhere," Starfish muttered to St. No-No. "Hey, wait .... I'm onscreen ...."

Yes. The small cabin rocked with laughter as they saw Starfish and X-Ray in their heated shovel battle of last year. Starfish threw her weapon at X, and he dodged it.

"Man, I forgot all about that," Starfish said.

"Yeah, because you LOST!!" teased X-Ray.

"There's nothing funny about it," Eloisha reprimanded him, slapping him sharply on the forehead.

"Perhaps not, but THAT is funny," laughed Squid, watching Dude run out of their tent wearing bright pink.

"Yeah, that was funny," St. No-No said, trying to cover a laugh.

"No it wasn't," Dude growled, folding her arms and sinking low into her chair. Then she grinned and brightened when the next little scene came on. "Now this--this is quality comedy, people!"

Squid frowned at the sight of his feet being bitten by lizards. "That was most definately NOT cool."

"Hey, it's Ben and J. Lo!" said Eloisha, when the two celebs appeared on screen. "That was so long ago, I forgot they had come! Wow .... they were actually together back then? Phew."

"Hey, I look good on a big screen," Zig Zag said, watching as he beat up Caveman. "Especially when I'm doing that."

"Mr. Pendanski said this might be too gory for you guys, but I had to beg to differ," the warden snorted. "That little punk Stanley drove me crazy."

"I hear that," Dude said, reaching over and giving the warden a high five. Then she turned her attention back to the screen. "Heyyy, this is when all us D-Tent girls were singing 'Bring Me To Life.' Wow."

"I don't remember that," said Eloisha. "It was so long ago..."

"Hey, it's me!" declared Tessyboos, looking up at the picture. "That was when I was telling Mr. Sir to stop smoking .... and then the car blew up ...."

"Oooh, that was painful," remarked Squid, as they watched themselves all fly backwards and land in a huge pile when the car did indeed explode. "But in retrospect it was kind of funny."

"Not in retrospect," Magnet said. "Just looking back on it."

"Ooooh, that's when Lindsay Lohan and Matt Damon came here!" squealed Starfish, jumping up and down in her seat. "That was sooo much fun."

"No it wasn't," Eloisha said. "It forced Squid and I into ninja outfits to go beat them to a bloody pulp."

"Hm....."

A few moments later the little movie was over. The warden shut off the projector and turned the lights back on.

"That was so sad!" sniffed X-Ray, wiping away a tear. "Just thinking about all those old memories really made me feel sentimental!"

"What are your sentiments towards outer space?" Ukulele Peanut asked him in a rather serious tone of voice.

Everyone stared at her, then decided to ignore her.

"Before you all dig into this scrumdiddlyumptious cake I made," the warden says. "I've got some questions for a couple of you. Squid .... you'd think I'd have found this out with my li'l cameras, but where did your nickname come from?"

"It's a good story," Squid laughed. "I went fishing one time with Armpit, and then I caught like five little squids. It was pretty awesome."

"You caught squids?" Hammer asked in disbelief. "Where the heck were you guys fishing at?"

"A good fisher never reveals his secrets," Armpit said. He looked at the warden hopefully. "Do you wanna know where my nickname came from?"

"Er, it's sort of obvious," the warden said, fanning the air by her. "But Dude, why are you called .... Dude?"

She shrugged. "Everyone had a nickname except me, so the author felt compelled to give me one randomly. She was like, 'Dude--you need a nickname.' And then it hit her like a ton of bricks how brilliant the name Dude was."

"So you like it?" the warden asked.

"No."

"........oh."

And so went the rest of the day's festivities. There was a pinata, bobbing for apples (although after Armpit had managed to sufficiently drool in it, no one else played), and a rousing game of hide-and-go-seek. But in one certain round of that game, when Zig Zag (who was it) opened a closet, he got one freaky surprise.

"AAAAAAAAAAH!!!" he screamed at the top of his lungs.

"That's not gonna work, Zig Zag," the warden called from her hiding spot. "I don't care if you're pretending to be dying! YOU'LL NEVER FIND ME!"

"NO, IT'S--IT'S STANLEY!!" he shouted in agony.

"Yeah, right," sighed Eloisha. "Zig Zag, we all know perfectly well that Stanley spontaneously combusted last year."

"That's right, Zig," said none other than Stanley Yelnats, smirking. "You must be seeing things. Maybe I'm a mirage."

"Woah, that was most definately Stanley's voice," said Starfish. She peeked over the back of the couch and screamed. "It IS Stanley!! AIEEEEE!!!"

With that, everyone immediately zipped out of their hiding spots and gasped in horror. "How can this be??" Squid cried with terror.

Stanley shrugged. "I dunno. I was floundering around in the dark for a while, then I suddenly showed up here." He glanced at Tessyboos. "Who're you?"

"This is our new inmate," answered Hammer, putting an arm around the blonde kid. "Her name is Tessyboos. Don't get too attatched, though .... she's moving."

"Sorry to hear that, Tessyboos," Stanley said, though no one was sure whether or not he was just mocking sympathy.

"Cut the comedy, Caveman," snarled Magnet. "What're you doing here?"

"What kind of stupid question is that?" asked Stanley. He laughed. "I told, I just ended up here by chance."

"Yeah, well we don't want you here!" Ukulele Peanut yelled, giving Stanley a hard shove. "SO I'LL JUST PICK UP WHERE I LEFT OFF AND BEAT YOU UP!! BWA HA HA HA HA HA!!"

"Ukulele Peanut!" the warden said sharply, causing the girl to come to a dead spot. The warden had a very dark look on her face, and Peanut's grip loosened on Stanley's shirt collar. Then the warden bent down and said, "Allow me to assist you."

"OOH, give 'em all ya got, warden!" cheered St. No-No. "Right jab! Upper cut! Take it from the left! No, no, your other left!!"

"Aw, what the heck? I'll join in," Zig Zag said.

"Hey, hey, HEY!" Tessyboos cried. "What's with all the violence?!"

"This is guy is a freaky creep," explained Hammer. "Trust me, you don't know the half of what he's like."

"Dude, I read the book," Tessyboos said.

"What?" asked Dude.

Tessy sighed, and said, "I've read Holes. So I know all about Stanley. You're not supposed to be beating him up, he's the protagonist."

"Oh," said Peanut, standing up and releasing Stanley. "Well, I guess I don't wanna be the bad guy, here, so .... you're free to go, Stan my man."

"What?!" the warden asked, as Zig Zag helped their former D-Tent member stand. "You're just gonna let him walk away like that?!"

"Not exactly," Zig said coolly. "Stanley, run away and never return. If you do, I'm sendin' the yella spotted lizards after you ... so you'd better be careful." He laughed evilly, and the rest of D-Tent joined in.

"You're all CRAZY!!" Stanley whimpered, running out of the cabin.

Armpit looked out the window. "Well, he's gone."

"Thank goodness," sighed Eloisha, flopping down onto a couch.

"We couldn't be happier," chorused the warden and Ukulele Peanut in sing-song voices. "Right, dear? Couldn't be happier; because happy is what happens when all your dreeeams come truuuuue!!!!!"

The gang stared at them. "What the freak?" Dude finally asked.

"It's a song," the warden explained. "From Wicked!"

"You've seen Wicked?!" X-Ray asked. "How?! I thought it was only on Broadway!"

"What do you think I did to entertain myself when this place was temporarily closed down?" the warden asked. "Mr. Sir and I took a trip to NYC."

"Yeah, and I saw it with my family when I was home," Ukulele Peanut. "You should all see it. It rocked."

"Was it wicked awesome?" St. No-No joked.

Everyone ignored that.

"Well, Tessyboos," sighed Squid. "We'll miss ya."

"Yeah, we really and sincerely will," Armpit said.

"Oh, guys!" Tessyboos whispered. "What a nice vibe I'm getting from this room!"

With that, there was a group hug (of which Tessyboos was the center), and then the party went on allll night.

----------woo and hoo--------------

A/N: do u guys see that box down there that says "Go" next to "Submit Review"? PRESS THE BUTTON!!