Been a while, been busy.
Me no own inu, WWWAAAHHHHHH!!!!!
Chap: visitation
The sun shone brightly down on the rows of engraved stone, making the place a bit more cheerful. A lone girl was walking slowly down the aisles, a small bag slung over her shoulder. She was dressed in a long black skirt with a matching blouse, and didn't seem to mind the chill air around her.
This was the first time she had come to see him.
There it was, a stone decorated with ribbons and old flowers, pictures and offerings. She'd found Hojou-kun.
Kagome walked forward, her steps almost hesitant. Stopping, she went down on her knees before the grave, pulling a bouquet of flowers from her bag and placing them beside all the others.
She tried to smile without crying. "Hello, Hojou-kun." She paused, looking a bit bewildered. "You know, I have no idea what to say. I just don't know what I should say, after everything that happened.
"I......had no idea, that you felt that strongly about me. A part of me knows that you would have done it for anybody; it's just the kind of person you are. Your heart is so big, especially after all those times you kept forgiving me for ditching you or breaking the date"—her voice broke on the last word, tears coming. "Why? Why did I have to think of him? I didn't mean to hurt you! I didn't, and I'm so sorry, (sob)!"
A warm hand fell on her shoulder. "I was wondering when you'd come."
The girl whirled to face the voice and paled. "Mrs. Hojou! I—I"— what could she say? 'Hi, I'm the person your son died for?'
"Hello, Higurashi-san." The woman knelt down beside her. "Are you feeling better now?"
"Huh?"
"I heard from my son that you suffer from a chronic illness. Are you feeling better today?"
The girl tried to smile ruefully. "Right now, I feel—like the lowest form of life on this earth."
The older woman looked at her, very little expression on her face. "Why?"
"Your son, you know what he did?"
"How he died? Yes, I know. He was protecting a dear friend from harm. You have nothing to feel bad for." Mrs. Hojou looked off into the distance, clearly remembering something about her son, before saying, "I'm so angry right now."
"What?"
"I-I feel as if I'll fly apart any minute now with rage. I've never hated anyone the way I hate Sakamura Eiji right now! But he's dead and I can't say anything to him now that would make any difference." She turned to face the young woman. "I understand that you said something to him before he killed himself. But no one was in the hall to hear it clearly. Will you tell me, what you said to him? The police told me that after you talked to him, is when he committed suicide. What did you say?"
Kagome took a few breaths, trying to push back the sick feelings produced by remembering that terrible day. "I—after he shot Hojou-kun, he kept looking blank. Then he looked right at me. And he started to crack. Not 'go crazy'-crack, but to turn back into a human being, breaking out of that shell. He looked scared and stunned and horrified. He was even crying.
"I told him that you," she nodded towards the woman, "would be sad that your son was dead. That his sister would be sad to loose her big brother, and he started screaming and crying that no one would miss anyone because nobody mattered or felt anything at all. Then I told him that good or bad, if someone dies, someone, somewhere, will always care that they lived or died."
She paused.
"Why on earth would he think such an awful thing? Sakamura, I mean. Why would he think that no one felt anything?"
"I don't know," Mrs. Hojou replied. "I can't imagine how anyone could think such a thing. I met his parents at the funeral. They couldn't' bear to look me in the eyes, but I knew. They were crying for their own son too, that they had lost something precious to them too. I—dammit, I wanted to hate them. I wanted them to be monsters, to have driven that boy to this, anything! Just not this damned empty feeling."
"Anything to make sense of this, huh?"
The woman nodded sadly. "Any sort of rhyme or reason to this insanity. Afterwards, they came up to me. I didn't know what to say to them, or they to me. I think they wanted to apologize, but that would have seemed meaningless, I guess. We just looked at each other, then said goodbye." She laughed to herself. "I found myself wanting to run after them and comfort them. Comfort them! Or, maybe, we could have comforted each other. Both of us had lost our only sons."
The woman paused, collecting herself. "I've once heard it said that the noblest way to die is by protecting something you love. That helps lessen some of the pain. My son died doing what he knew was right." She too, started to cry, the tears dripping onto her gloved hands. "I'm proud that he—was such a good boy. I'm so proud, but oh, why did he have to die?!"
Kagome and Mrs. Hojou reached out and held each other, crying for the fate of a young man.
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Inuyasha looked down on them from his perch in a nearby tree. So this was Hojou's mother. She was quite pretty. She was also so damned sad. Both of them were. He wanted to say something, do something, but nothing came to his mind that seemed right. Gods, he hated not being able to do anything. He couldn't even get revenge for their pain; the bastard had already taken care of that himself.
He resolved to just watch and make sure nothing happened to them. What else could he do?
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What felt like hours later, their tears finally stopped. They simultaneously started digging for tissues in their purses, caught the other doing so, and for the first time in over a week laughed. It was just a little chuckle, but it was a start.
They could heal from this, if they tried. It would take so, so long, but it could be done.
They both stood to leave. Mrs. Hojou turned to go, but remembered something. "Higurashi-san?"
"Yes?"
"What did my son say to you?"
Kagome knew exactly what she meant, and didn't try to dodge it. "He told me to be happy with the man I loved." She raised panicked eyes to the mother, "I swear, I wasn't stringing him along, I really did try to break it off with him, but I just couldn't get him to listen"—
"It's alright. I think a part of him knew, but he still wanted to keep trying. Don't worry, I'm not angry with you." She smiled slightly. "Goodbye, Higurashi-san. Lets meet here again sometime, yes?"
Kagome gave her a ghost of smile back. "I would like that." She watched as the woman walked out of the cemetery's
gates.
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Please review. End it here?
