November 4th
By the time I got home from work it was morning. Not too late...just after 1:30. I strolled to the kitchen for a drink of water. I had a headache that'd spent an entire shift with me. I climbed the stairs, turned the corner to find my bed occupied.
I kicked off my shoes, waking Emily from her slumber. She yawned while stretching. I asked her if she was okay since it wasn't normal for her to be in my room. She sat up while explaining that she was worried about me. I apologized for being late, a little baffled by it all. It wasn't the first time I'd been late. She cleared up all the confusion when she asked how I was doing, adding that she'd been by Mercy to wish Bosco well.
He seemed so sad she'd explained. I knew the feeling. He'd seemed sad to me too. Sad and worried about what he was leaving behind. I sat beside Emily, pulling her into a hug. I told her I understood adding that I was proud of her. I thanked her for what she'd done for Rose. She shrugged it off saying that she liked Rose.
After a little while longer, she got up, strolling back to her own bed. She'd done so but not before telling me that everything was going to be okay. Sometimes I wonder who's the parent and who's the kid.
November 25th
Thanksgiving was a mixed blessing...so to speak. On one hand I have a lot to be thankful for. I'm grateful that Bosco survived the horrendous injuries that nearly took him from us. I'm grateful that I have Emily living with me. It's not perfect; nowhere near perfect but then living with a teenager never was. I'm grateful for Rose...for her suggestion that I share her home...for the strength I get from her in this ordeal with Bosco...for the positive influence she has on Emily...for the support she gave me through my divorce..
However, there are things I wish were different. I still feel that I failed in my marriage. Looking back, I can't see anything that I would have done differently but yet I still feel that I failed. Not so much where Fred and I are concerned. I feel I failed my children especially since they no longer share a roof.
I wish Bosco was with us...sharing Thanksgiving dinner with Rose and Emily and I. But most of all, speaking as a mother, I wish Rose and Bosco weren't grieving the loss of Mikey. All in all, Mikey wasn't a bad guy. Somewhere along the line he just took the wrong exit. His death was a tragedy given that he was trying to do the right things. I guess I should add that I'm grateful for the time Bosco had with Mikey...the night Mikey got his six-month coin.
December 6th
I finally got Emily and Charlie's school pictures. On my way to work, I dropped an envelope off in the mail, sending Bosco one of each. Over the years, I'd always shared the kid's school pictures with Bosco. This year they'd be a little different. I hoped they'd be a positive reminder of two people who anxiously wanted Uncle Bosco back home.
December 13th
I went into work today on a mission I knew that Bosco wouldn't be home for Christmas this year. So, I'd gone to the drug store and bought a nice card for him. I also bought a pad of paper. I stopped off to see Lieu, catching him before roll call. My plan was to have any many as possible sign the card. In addition, I thought maybe some of them would want to add a little message. I planned on mailing the card on the 15th which would give it a week to reach Bosco in Boston.
Lieu promised me he'd make an announcement in roll call and pass the word along to the other shifts as well. I was cordial enough to let Cruz know, although I didn't stick around long enough to get her response.
December 15th
I cried when I saw the number of responses to Bosco's card project. Lieu had been collecting them in his office. At first he handed me the card. There wasn't a bare spot on it anywhere. Even the back was filled. I was still studying all the names on the card when he presented me with a box filled with little notes from the 55 gang. I didn't count them but it was amazing. Even more amazing was the card and notes I got when I made a stop at Mercy. Mary had heard about the card idea and had gone down to the gift shop and bought one. Like the one from the house, it was filled with names. In addition there were fifteen or twenty letters; some short and some not so short.
Instead of mailing a nice card I ended up mailing a small box filled with messages. I was so overwhelmed with it that I paid the extra to have it sent priority so Bosco would get it well before Christmas.
December 23rd
I arrived at the station to find Lieu with a silly smile on his face. I questioned him as to what made him so happy. I suppose I sounded like Scrooge but then it was going to be my first Christmas without my kids.
Lieu directed me to follow him into his office which I did. He picked up an envelope, handing it to me. It was addressed to the 55th precinct. The postmark was from Boston. Lieu explained that he was at the desk when the mail came in. He saw the postmark and knew it must be from Bosco. So, he'd saved it til I got in.
I must have looked like a kid at Christmas ripping it open. It was a card...a Christmas card. I read the front of it quickly before flipping it open. Inside was a holiday cheer message which I barely read. What caught my eye was what was written below that. It was shaky and a little uneven but it clearly said 'Bosco'.
Sully stopped by questioning why the two of us were so happy. He figured neither of us had heard the weather forecast. Weathermen were predicting a snowstorm with heavy snowfall starting later tonight.
I handed Sully the card, watching his expression change from Ebenezer talking about snowfall to the smile as he nodded his head. His eyes met mine and for a second, I swear he was choked up inside. He handed me the card back while giving me a hug. I gave the card back to Lieu so he could share it at roll call. Then I called Rose to check on her flight. She was supposed to leave for Boston in the morning. By the time I got home from work, her flight had been cancelled. I knew she'd be upset about not being able to spend Christmas with Bosco especially since it was her first one without Mikey.
Rose was somewhat upset but not as much as I would have expected. I found the reason why in an envelope. She'd received a card...signed by Bosco. She smiled as I read it, then handed me another card. This one was also from Boston and was addressed to me and Emily. Emily appeared out of nowhere. I questioned why she hadn't opened it since it was addressed to her as well. She shrugged her shoulders before asking me if I was going to open it or not?
December 24th
Christmas Eve. Emily and I went to Mass with Rose. Despite the fact that we're not Catholic, we felt welcomed by a congregation that engulfed Rose in hugs and wishes that Bosco would be home soon.
Near the end of the service, the minister offered a blessing for those of God's children who had joined him during the past year...it's still unreal to put Mikey and death in the same sentence. The minister also offered a blessing for those who were unable to be with us this year. This included Bosco. Those who we'd lost would forever be with us in our hearts. Those who were unable to join us tonight, he prayed would be with us in the coming year.
I know in my heart that the service helped. It was nice being around people who cared about Bosco and who showered Rose with their love and well-wishes.
Christmas Day
I might never complain about another snowfall...not even a blizzard.
Fred was supposed to be back from his honeymoon. He was going to have Emily and Charlie since I had them for Thanksgiving. Unfortunately for him the heavy snow forced his flight to be cancelled. Emily and Charlie spent Christmas with Rose and me.
I won't say that I didn't miss Bosco but having my kids with me for Christmas...it was a wonderful Christmas.
February 28th
It's been another long shift in the snow and cold. I can't seem to get warm anymore. I sit in my room, wondering how Bosco's doing. If I had it my way, I'd get in the car and drive up to Boston and see for myself. I've had that urge a lot.
I've written him several letters, just to keep him up to date on all the excitement at the house. I hate myself every time I mail a letter, wondering if it's good for me to keep writing about stuff at work. It seems I don't have this feeling while I'm writing or on my way to the mailbox. I only get it when I let go of the letter.
I haven't heard back from any of my letters. It's only after I let go of another one that I got an idea. Maybe I'll try my idea in the next letter.
March 3rd
I decided that it's time. I've been saving money for awhile now and I think its time to find my own place...a place for Emily and me. I told Rose and she did exactly what I expected. She told me I was welcome to stay as long as I wanted. She loved having Em and me. I know I'm going to miss her and I know Emily will too. I told Emily about my decision. I think she was surprised. She said she'll miss Rose and of course Rose commented that Emily was welcome to spend the night now and then if she wanted.
Now all I have to do if find a place in New York. I made Emily another promise as well. I told her I won't sign anything until she gets to see the place too. We're going to start looking next week. Not the ideal way to spend spring break but it'll make it easier since she won't be in school during the day.
March 11th
Emily and I found a place. It's not far from where Ty and Carlos live. The rooms aren't especially big as if anything in New York has large rooms. Anyway, Emily likes it...I like it and I might just have money left over to do something besides pay bills. Bad news is that it won't be available until the end of April. I figure that's not such a bad thing since it will give me more time to pack and more time to gather up a moving party.
March 18th
It's been over a month since I wrote him last. My guilt over talking about the station lasted longer this time. Anyway, I sat down to write him another letter and I remembered my idea from a month ago.
I have no idea how he's progressing. I'm being positive here...thinking that he's getting better. I might have to strangle him if he isn't...especially after he's been gone so long.
Anyway, instead of just writing to him like I usually do, I make it like a test. I write about something and offer him three choices as to how it ended leaving a line there for him to make his choice. I figure if he can write his name, despite it being somewhat shaky, he can certainly mark an X on my 55th Precinct update quiz. I decided to go easy on him, only asking five questions. Besides, it's hard work coming up with bogus answers that could be real.
April 1st
If I didn't know better, I'd swear Bosco planned on me getting his answers back on April Fools Day.
I was sitting at lunch wishing this day would end when I remembered the letter. The mailman had just come as I was leaving for work so I didn't have time to read it. I pulled it out while waiting for our meal. Lunch today was with Sully and Davis. It was a rare occasion when the two of them got to work together.
Anyway I'm sitting there reading this and snickering all the while. Finally Sully reaches over taking the letter from my hand. I explained it was from Bosco while grabbing it back. Okay so now I had their attention. So I explained the concept, making it a multiple choice quiz to see how well Bosco knew our sector. I read the five questions to Sully and Davis. They both missed one. Not the same one, but they missed one. Turns out Bosco did better than anyone. He got all five right.
April 27th
Moving day....I swear this is the last time. I know I said that last time but this time is the last time. The final last time.
My party of movers didn't change much since last time. It actually increased by several of Emily's friends. Once again, I give credit to Haggerty's for their fine selection of sturdy boxes. The amount of furniture we moved changed which is kind of strange when you consider that I hadn't bought anything. Rose was having a sale and the price was right....free too a good home.
April 29th
The job of unpacking was far worse than before. It kept me busy but it did little to stop the memories that flooded my mind. The year anniversary of Mikey's death and Bosco's shooting is drawing near. Before moving out and several times during and after I reminded Rose that Emily and I would be with her if she wanted us...if she needed us. She talked about going to visit her sister who lived upstate.
May 1st
I dropped Rose off at the bus station today. She's decided to get away for a while...visit with her sister. The reminder of Mikey's death is too much for her. She doesn't want to be here on the anniversary of his death. I don't blame her. I'm having enough trouble dealing with the anniversary of Bosco's shooting coming up.
May 2nd
I spent the day unpacking. After unpacking most of what was left to unpack, I went on a cleaning frenzy...not just everyday cleaning but cleaning that left me exhausted. As exhausted as I was it didn't make me forget what today was. One year since Mikey's body had been found...what was left of his body. It still gives me chills to think of Bosco seeing Mikey like that. I have no idea how a person gets past that.
I called Rose at her sister's, talking with her until it was time for me to head to work. It was a long shift; one that I never thought was going to end. Around ten-thirty Jelly and I headed back to the station.
We got back to the station. I was following Jelly as we made our may up the sidewalk. Jelly was still mumbling about the case we were working on. My mind was on overload. It was refusing to absorb another word. All I wanted to do was grab my stuff and go home and go to bed. Maybe I could sleep for a week and miss the 7th. Maybe I wouldn't have to relive that day. Maybe I wouldn't have nightmares about it. Maybe I could erase the images of Bosco lying there, covered in blood, dying before my very eyes. As we entered the lobby, I attempted to get ahead of Jelly, hoping I could bypass everyone. I'd felt eyes on me all night. I wasn't the only one who'd remembered what day was coming up but Bosco wasn't everybody's partner. He's my partner. Even nearly a year later I still think of Bosco as my partner.
I thought I'd made it but as I reached the steps I heard Lieu's voice calling my name. I breathed a heavy sigh, turning to see what he wanted. I turned but I didn't see Lieu. What I saw was my best friend...my partner. Bosco was home.
The tears were almost instantaneous...so much so that I was lucky I didn't fall down the few steps that separated us. The sappy side of me knows that Bosco wouldn't have let me fall.
What I saw in the following few moments wasn't just my partner. What I saw was my partner turning to face me. What I saw was my partner walking towards me. I don't remember those few seconds between seeing him and feeling his arms engulf me. I think we collapsed into each other, holding on to each other for dear life. Bosco and I had never been all touchy feely but today that all changed. I never wanted to let go
As amazing as it was to see Bosco, to watch him stand on his own two feet...to walk across the room, the most amazing thing was hearing him say my name. In addition to my name I heard my partner tell me that he'd missed me.
At some point I realized that I still needed to get my stuff. I told Lieu not to let Bosco out of his sight, that I'd be right back. I started up the stairs hearing Lieu say something about 'go ahead'. Next thing I knew Bosco and I made our way to the locker room. I rushed over to my locker. Bosco wasn't as enthusiastic. He made the slow walk ending up in front of his old locker. I remember looking up to see him staring at it. I started to walk over to it when I heard Sully's voice telling Bosco 'it's still yours you know'.
Bosco glanced up, spotting not only Sully but Ty as well. Ty was the first to step forward offering Bosco a hug. What was really sweet was watching Sully do the same, adding that it was good to see him and admitting that he'd missed Bosco.
Bosco took it in stride although somewhat quiet in agreeing that he'd missed Sully and Ty as well. Glancing at his locker, Bosco was momentarily lost in thought. Sully broke the silence, commenting that he'd thought about 'him' a lot today...that no one deserved what Mikey went through. Bosco smiled, thanking Sully. I honestly think he thought maybe we'd forgotten what day it was...that he was the only one who'd remembered. Ty was almost too obvious when he said that the four of us needed to get together...catch up...maybe grab a beer or something. I think he knew it was a tough day for Bosco and his homecoming could wait for another day. I wasn't used to Bosco being so quiet but then I guess after the year he's been through, it seemed logical that he might be a different person.
The four of us started to leave. I'd just reached the door when it swung open slamming into my forehead. The first thing I heard was 'Son of a bitch...'
What can I say? Music to my ears. So maybe Bosco hasn't changed all that much. Bosco's meeting of Finny wasn't off to a good start.
Finny yelled back, questioning something like who are you and what's your problem? Bosco countered that Finney was his problem. Finney took a step forward asking if Bosco wanted to make something of it. Bosco being Bosco stood his ground. The little homecoming was interrupted by of all things laughter. Bosco glanced over at me before scanning the crowd that had gathered. No one said a word. Not Sully...not Davis, not Monroe or Lieu...not even Hancock. Even Stick was speechless, although his face said it all. That and the way he was rubbing his temples while shaking his head.
Lieu was the first one to speak, making a comment to the effect of 'twenty minutes Bosco...twenty minutes. I was beginning to wonder.' That said, Lieu smiled, patted him on the shoulder and headed back to the desk.
Finney started to walk away but Bosco stopped him telling him that he still owed me an apology. Finney tossed out the lamest of apologies before stomping off.
Bosco was officially home.
The end..
I know from reading stories and replies that there are Bos/Faith shippers and there are those who are completely against it. I respect both sides. So, if you fall into the non-shipper category, this is the end. I'd like to thank you for giving my story a chance. I hope you've enjoyed it.
However, if you fall into the shipper category, chapter 6 is for you...
