Disclaimer: I don't own them. I simply find things for them to do.

No-one could precisely remember when Seamus Finnegan had developed a crush on Hermione. But it looked for all the world as if it was reciprocated in kind. The two of them spent many long hours together outside their classes, and it was supposed that a half-Muggle and a Muggleborn had much in common and were well suited.

Ron had graciously accepted the apparent mutual infatuation, and subsequently decided to play a good-humoured prank for Valentine's Day. His mistake had probably been to rely on his elder twin brothers for the Exploding Smoke Signal.

Growing up in the care of a father who had a penchant for Muggle artefacts had rubbed off on the boys. After several discussions with Hermione and much probing around Arthur's box of Muggle technology, the boys had created a charmed device that closely resembled a Muggle mobile telephone. Ron had been pressed into taking one back to Hogwarts as it was deemed more private and immediate than the owl post or floo.

It had likely been inexperience with talking to someone across vast distances that led to Fred wrongly transcribing the order that Ron had "'phoned" through to the shop. It was certainly the excuse he was given, even if Fred's tone had lacked the faintest hint of remorse.

As usual, the entire school was assembled on February 14th for the obligatory Valentine's breakfast. Ron had sat excitedly waiting for the morning's big surprise, trying desperately not to look up at every single owl that swooped within ten feet of Hermione's seat.

A rather cross looking Barn Owl had eventually deposited the innocuous looking missive in Hermione's lap, and she had unthinkingly opened it immediately. No sooner was the seal broken than a sizeable explosion shook the Gryffindor table and a huge cloud of pink and silver smoke burst forth, rapidly coalescing itself into a large heart shape that bore the unmistakable notation:

H G

4

S S

The hall erupted.

The last thing Hermione heard before the shock kindly robbed her of consciousness was Ron's voice yelling "EFF, you moron, not ESS!" into his charmed telephone. And if Professor Vector had noticed the faint tinge of pink that had crept across Professor Snape's face as the implications of the smoke signal sunk in, she certainly didn't mention it.