Four months passed when Katina gave up waiting. Her stops at the cemetery had grown more and more brief. And then she just gave up and visited in daylight hours, usually during her run. He wasn't coming back.
She'd become more involved with the Scoobies. Tara was right. Willow had the potential to become a very powerful witch.
"Just remember," she warned Willow during a routine patrol. "You're like Peter Parker right now. You've got this great gift, but in order to finely attune your spider-senses, you have to realize that with great power comes great responsibility."
Willow smiled broadly. Her respect and admiration of Kit had grown every day since Tara had first introduced them.
She watched as Kit continued to twirl the stake in her hand. And she noticed the way she slowed whenever they passed the bench not too far from her family's graves. She thought of how unfair it was that the two people Kit had loved most had been taken away from her. She just didn't understand a thing about how the Powers worked. It didn't make a lick of sense.
Tara noticed Kit staring longingly at the bench and realized that it wasn't Denny and Gracie that her sister was remembering. It was Spike.
"He always comes back," she whispered, slipping an arm around her sister's shoulders. "Always."
Willow looked between them wondering what secret the sisters were sharing.
"Who always comes back?"
The blondes snapped their heads up and looked at the red-head. She'd heard them.
"If you need to find someone, we could do a Lassie Come Home," Willow offered, referring to a locator spell.
Kit shook her head and glanced up at Willow. May as well tell her, she thought, surprised that Tara hadn't.
"It wouldn't work," she told her pupil.
"I know I'm not great at spells and all, but I'm pretty good at a simple loc--"
"He isn't alive, Will," Kit interrupted. "He's..." She shook off the urge to cry. She'd done a lot of that since William left her. "You wouldn't understand."
Willow tried not to be hurt by the comment. Of course she'd understand. Had Dennis come to her as a ghost? What wouldn't she understand.
"I'll tell you about it when we get home, Will," Tara offered, hoping that would satisfy her for now.
Later...
Katina pulled the throw-rug up from her living room floor exposing the hard wood. She pulled out a piece of chalk and drew a circle, just as she had every night since he left. In the center, she placed the letter he had written, her only link to him.
"Goddess Persephone, Mother Hecate, Achlys, Daughters of the Night... Tara, Goddess of Protection... walk with William. Encloak him in your eternal shield. Hebe, Goddess of Forgiveness, forgive him and allow him to forgive himself. I beseech thee, through the order of Osiris."
She lit three candles and placed three white roses on top of the envelope. She whispered something in Latin and then blew out each candle finishing her incantation with the words I am but your humble servant.
At the house on Revello Drive...
"Why didn't you tell me before?" Willow asked, eyes wide and mouth dropped in shock.
"It wasn't mine to tell you, Baby. It was Kit's. And she knew how everyone felt about him. B-but... I think she loves him."
Willow couldn't have concealed her surprise if she'd tried. Spike had been gone for six months. Buffy had come back from patrol muttering something about no-good, stupid vampire and then went on to tell them that he'd removed everything from his crypt. He was gone again, probably to find Dru. Not that she'd even have him in his chipped state.
"How? How could the chip... how?"
"I don't know," Tara admitted. "Kit didn't know either. She just knew that it didn't work. She said that she sensed a spark in him. And that she had a very strong feeling that it was what had kept him from hurting humans."
"But he left. Why? Did he want to hurt humans again?" Willow asked.
"No, Baby. No." He hadn't wanted to hurt anyone. Most of all, Kit. "He loves her, Will. He would never hurt her. But I think she scared him when she told him that it was his own free-will that had been keeping him from hurting anyone. I don't think he trusted himself."
"How can you be so sure that he'll come back?" Willow asked, feeling guilty that she really didn't want him to come back. What if he came back all Big Bad? She didn't want to be the one to tell Tara that Buffy had to stake him.
"B-because," Tara took a deep breath. "Because I know him. I g-got to know him. After we vanquished my father. Spike would stop by and check on me. And I think that's what drew him and Kit together. I think they sensed something in each other. They sensed me, somehow. But I don't think either of them knew what it was until it was too late."
Willow couldn't believe what she was hearing. Spike and Tara had been close? Why hadn't she known? What could she tell him that she couldn't tell me, she wondered.
Tara told her that she felt bad for Spike. At first, at least. Nobody wanted to understand him. And she knew how that felt. And then, they'd forged a friendship. He never expected anything from her. But from time to time, he'd do something nice. Leave a rose on the doorstep. Buffy had assumed that it was for her, but Spike told her that he'd been leaving them for her, not the Slayer. He'd found a magick book that he thought she'd like. Willow was beginning to look jealous until Tara assured her that it wasn't like that.
"It's like he is with Dawnie," she assured her girlfriend. "A brotherly love. H-he's just grateful to have someone who doesn't judge him. I think that's why he fell in love with Kitty."
Willow tried to understand. It was just pretty much impossible to grasp this side of Spike that she'd never seen for herself. Or had she? She thought back to some of the more pleasant times that he was around. Like when Buffy had died. He continued to fight by their side and protect Dawn with his very unlife. He never asked for anything in return. And, sadly, they hadn't given anything either. Not even a smile or thanks in his direction.
A soft knock on the front door had Tara on her feet and snapped Willow out of her reverie.
"Spike!" she heard Tara gasp. "Oh my Goddess! Get in here."
"Shouldn't be inviting in the Big Bad, Pet," he grinned. He'd missed Tara. And he'd missed her sister even more.
"Big Bad my... Spike, just come in," she demanded. She narrowed her eyes on him, trying to suss out whether or not the spark was still there. And it was. It glowed even brighter than she remembered.
He reached over and pinched her arm causing her to yelp.
"Dammit, Spike." Glinda was swearing. That brought a smirk to the snarky vamp's lips. "What was that for?"
"No bells and whistles going off, Pet," he told her, still refusing to cross the threshhold.
"Yeah, I can see that. Nothing I didn't already know." He looked surprised. "But the spark's even stronger. So quit loitering about our porch and come in."
He smiled and accepted her invitation. He saw Red sitting on the couch staring at him through wide eyes. Guess they both knew. He cautiously took a seat in the chair next to the couch.
"You're a dope," Tara accused.
"What?!"
"You're. A. Dope."
He stared at her for a moment wondering where she'd found her nerve.
"What the Hell is that supposed to mean?" he asked her incredulously.
"You left her. She loves you and you left her. You're a dope," Tara repeated.
"Aw, bloody hell. I had to be sure I couldn't hurt her, Glinda. Couldn't have you casting some spell on me that had me turning to dust for hurting big sis, yeah?"
Tara crossed her arms and stared at him.
"How is she?" he asked, his voice softer and more concerned.
"You mean you haven't even gone to her yet?" Willow asked, starting to understand just how important the relationship had become between the vampire and the Maclay girls.
"I went to the park. Left some lillies with Gracie. I waited all last night. She never showed," he sighed. "She's given up on me."
"You really are a dope," Tara frowned. "She stopped going at night. After several months of disappointment, she just started going during the day. You know, you're not too bright for someone as old as you claim you are," she added.
No, he supposed he wasn't.
"Before you go to her, we need to have a good, long talk," she told him. "You need to know exactly what your leaving has done to her."
