AUTHOR'S NOTE: In answer to your questions, Nemo Returning: Yes, I did erase the catty comments; they were originally posted at the very end of "The ThriceWrought Challenge". And yes, that is one of my favorite outfits (that specific T-shirt has not been made yet, actually—it's on my to-do list), my hairstyle, and it is most definitely my makeup and jewelry. Just ask the people I go to church with. (insert evil grin here)

And no, I'm not kidding about the church thing; I've worn my dog collar to services. AE

Chapter 10: Dobby 4857

Harry, Pansy, and Bonfoy weren't the only ones at the Three Broomsticks. All of SPWEB had gathered to celebrate Hufflepuff's downfall, and a bunch of other people were there, too. It seemed that those others' priorities were a bit off, though—they were celebrating the demise of Oh-Whatsisname.

Only a couple of hours into the party, though, the door opened to admit a group of bandaged and brightly-clad party-poopers. Hannah Abbott, Derek Abelmore, and Ernie MacMillan crossed the room, their presence causing jaws to drop and their uniforms causing eyes to close. Since her arrest, Hannah had acquired an eye patch, Harry noted.

"Think it's over, Potter?" Hannah snapped, leaning across the table to glare at him with her remaining eye.

"It's Snape," Pansy snapped irritably.

"Whatever, Dogface," Hannah retorted, then returned her address to Harry. "You won't be rid of us so easily. We were content before just to waltz in and take what's rightfully ours—"

"I don't waltz," Ernie interrupted, sounding hurt.

"Tango, then—"
"I don't tango, either."

Hannah rolled her eye and turned on him. "Well then, what do you do?" she demanded.

Ernie drew himself up with rather stiff dignity. "I square dance," he announced.

"Fine!" Hannah whirled back to face the now-snickering Slytherins. "We were content to just square dance in and take what's rightfully ours, but you had to go and declare war, so war it is!"

"Does that mean another story, then?" Harry asked, sounding a little bored. "One in which you become my new arch-nemesis now that Whatsisface is dead?"

"You've got a nemesis already," Hannah told him coldly. "For the moment, all I am is a high-ranking evil henchwoman.

"And just who is this so-called nemesis?" Pansy inquired.

As if in answer, a very small, cloaked and hooded figure leaped onto the table and with a maniacal laugh, drew back its hood.

"Hello, Harry Snape," it said sinisterly. "You is not forgetting me?"

Harry stared at it in new-dawning shock. "Dobby?!" he sputtered. "I hexed you to death in the last story!"

"And Dobby is not forgetting it, oh, no," the house elf assured him. "If it is war you is wanting, it is war you is getting. Or did Harry Snape think that evil Hufflepuff is too stupid to clone especially good agents like Dobby?"

The trio exchanged looks, then Bonfoy said, "Well, actually, yeah."

"That one's going to cost you, Malfoy," Derek snarled.

"Put it on my tab," the Slytherin countered. "You can't to anything to me this story—look, here come the credits."

To Be Continued…

Starring
Bob Moss as Harry Snape

Draco Malfoy as Bonfoy
and
Spuds McKenzie and Tyria Sarkin as Pansy Parkinson

With Special Guest Appearances by

Richard Harris as Albus Dumbledore
Sibyl Trelawney as Hermione Snape
Alan Rickman as Severus Snape
Bethany Wiley as Herself
and
Aren Kilmer as Ancalimë Erendis

Marzipan's teeth sharpened exclusively at The Cutting Edge

Death Eaters' red shirts provided by Starfleet Command.

No animals were harmed in the making of this story, but it was a near-miss as several Death Eaters received "love chomps" from one Princess Marzipan during the cast party.