Title: Something Like Aladdin
Authors: O'Neill (Fuzzy) and Spacemonkey (Muggins).
Classification: Mystery/Comedy
Rating: PG-13 (That's the highest we could go.)
Disclaimer:
We're 2 idiots sitting in a corner (but not just ANY corner, but. . .The Corner) writing this story. We came up with this in The Corner so please direct all complaints and issues to The Corner. On a more serious note, these characters you will read about are not ours. They belong to MGM and Disney respectively, and their associated affiliates. Please don't sue us! We're not the richest people in the world (damn you Bill Gates, you stole all our money!). . .We only live in The Corner. . .pity us. . .
Summary:
Well, it goes a little somethin' like this. . .And you thought the second Aladdin movie was the end of the franchise. . .well, technically you're right – until now. Stargate vs. Aladdin. . .Who will win? (drum roll please – okay, you can stop now. Thanks) To add to the suspense, Jack O'Neill finds an eccentric mechanism that puts them into a whole new world. . .literally. Intriguing eh? We know you want to read it!
Authors Notes:
Firstly: we're idiots. Did we mention that? I think we did. Anywho, We really appreciate feedbacks, inputs, requests, and constructive criticism! Whatever you have in mind, spill! Except for flames, they burn. This is our first story and we give thanks to those that review the Prologue and hopefully this'll continue. Duh. Of course it will!!
On a last note: Some of our following chapters might take gradual to upload. There may be some big or succinct delays but please be patient! Okay, we lied. There's another note that we forgot to mention: This is PG-13 and the language may not be your penchant. It's isn't. . . that bad. . . and our strategy is not to 'scare' away the youngsters here, mind you. So please forgive us!!
Anything else? No. But if so, we'll add it onto the next following chapters!
This is for you lot! Enjoy!
Prologue: Something Unexpected
"What the?" Daniel Jackson mumbled as he groggily peeled his eyes open, only to see a white haired man standing over him. The man grinned, albeit unconventionally and kneeled down adjacent to the motionless figure.
"Wakey, wakey, Danny boy, its time for your morning medicine!" Colonel Jack O'Neill announced with a little bit too much enthusiasm for Daniel at that time of day, which scared Daniel a little. Jack slapped Daniel lightly across his right cheek and chuckled, taking another swig at his wine. Daniel raised an eyebrow.
"Jack, what the hell are you on about?" He said calmly. Then, "What medicine?!!" He screamed, his dark eyes widening. Jack tilted his head and held up a bottle of vodka, which was half empty in one hand while placing the empty wine glass on the carpet floor beside him.
"You left this on the couch. Damn, it made a mess." He continued with an impish grin. "Your poor, poor, neglected couch, which, I might add, I will be inheriting when you retire from the SGC."
Daniel reached behind his glasses, rubbing both of his scarlet eyes and spoke in a hoarse whisper, "Jack, what the hell are you on about? My couch isn't neglected." He moaned and gradually rolled over onto his abdomen. "Or more to the point, what are you on?"
"What am I on?" Jack gasped, grabbing Daniel's upper right arm and lifted him up onto his feet at haste.
"Damn, I was hoping you wouldn't hear that. OW!" Daniel yelled.
Jack wiggled his finger in front of Daniel's eyes, looking quite goaded at the young archaeologist. "Daniel, Daniel, Daniel. Don't tell me you've forgotten already!"
Squinting behind his normally crystal clear glasses, which were at the moment dirty and littered with fingerprints because Daniel hadn't cleaned them for days, Daniel stared at his CO and grimaced at the sudden demeanour. "Okay, Jack, you're scaring me. What's going on?" he said, taking a few steps backward, fortunately missing the glass coffee table that was nearby by just an inch.
Rearing back, Jack surveyed the archaeologist and sneered. "Naww. . ." he began, looking at him straight in the eyes with curiosity. "What's the matter, Daniel?" the Colonel inquired in a horrible baby talk tone of voice. "Come on, join the club! Live a little bit!" Jack pushed Daniel towards the kitchen where Samantha Carter, Teal'c, Jonas Quinn, and Janet Frasier were holding a drinking competition.
"No, not more. . .please! I feel sick enough already!" Daniel pleaded desperately, scampering back into the lounge room. A slight panic rose into the handsome man's stomach as he struggled to break free from the Colonel's grasp.
"Let. . .me. . .go!" Jack pushed Daniel once again in the direction of the kitchen, except this time his inaccuracy made Daniel's body collide into...let's say, something immense.
(Crash!)
"Jack!" Daniel yelled after crashing into a valuable asset. "That was a precious monument from Mongolia, you idiot!" Slowly but surely, Daniel lifted his body and was now on his hands and knees, lamenting the breakage of the monument. He bit his tongue, trying not to be the party pooper on his own birthday.
"Oh," Jack breathed out. He bent down on one knee and attempted to help Daniel pick up the scattered pieces. "Here, let me fix it for you."
(Crackle. . .)
"Jack! You're not helping! Just. . .just go away! You're making things worse!"
"Geez Daniel, you don't have to hurt my feelings. . .okay, okay, I'll go away." Jack replied. Then, under his breath, "Party pooper." Daniel shook his head in frustration.
"Jack!" Sam called out, half laughing. "We need more wine!"
Jack nodded his head. "Danny, where's the grog?" he inquired in a slurry voice.
"It's in the basement," Daniel walked back into the main lounge room, brushing the diminutive solid pieces off his beige trousers and grabbed his bottle of vodka that he once held in his hands before passing out onto the floor.
(Crash! Bang!. . .Thud!. . .)
"Oh for crying out loud!" a muffled voice filled the silence.
Daniel came to and shook his head. "Jack, there's a light there."
"Danny. . .bee. . .care. . .full. . .stairs. . .slipppppp. . .erry. . ."
A flash of bright light filtered away the obscurity that Jack had once laid in.
"Idiot," Daniel mumbled, stumbling away from the basement entrance and joining the others in a new competition – Laugh or Die By Drink.
"Oh-kay, where. . .are. . .we. . .now? Ooh. . .something. . .shiny. . .Danny boy. . .is a rich bugger. . .and. . .we. . .didn't. . .even. . .know. . .about it! Selfish. . .too. . ." Jack crawled towards the gold object that was partially hidden by a pair of Daniel's love heart boxers lying in a basket of clothes.
"Wow. . .Jack..want. . .a. . .loook. . ." he extended both of his unsteady arms, reaching out for the gold object and cautiously examined in. Jack rubbed his hands upon the gold mechanism and suddenly the object moved, shaking from side to side uncontrollably within Jack's grasp, before a dark cloud of fog enveloped the entire basement, extending from the snout-like apparatus on the object. The fog slowly rose up the stairs and drifted out into the lounge room.
Meanwhile, upstairs, the SG-1 team retreated to the lounge room again after they tired of their Laugh or Die dispute. Teal'c noticed the smog and pointed to the growing cloud with drunken bewilderment. The smog soon contracted into becoming a thick charcoal column of a steam-like substance.
"Is something burning, Dr Jackson?" Teal'c queried, raising an eyebrow.
"Oh, that," Daniel glanced. He did a double take and gasped as the realization hit him.
"What the hell?! Jack!"
TBC!
A/N: You know what to do, click on the little button that's on the left corner! Please? We live for reviews! Let us know what you think!
The next chapter is coming up soon! Once again, thank you so much for reviewing!
