A/N: Hi! More darkness from me, I'm afraid. I wrote this along with the other one I just posted a long time ago. As you can tell, I was going through an "evil" stage in my writing. Probably because I kept on listening to that damnly good song Hallelujah by Rufus Wainwright (I LOVE THAT SONG). And this just popped out. Of my fingers and my mind.
Blame the writer's diarrhoea, if you will. But read, anyhow.
And YES, I AM trying to update Occ. Haz. But xxreixxput forth some action inside of me by telling me that I could post some other stuff at the same time as write Occ.Haz. I don't wanna upset any of you guys. So you know. THIS WAS THE MONSTER THAT WAS CREATED!
Think of it as Delilah's Frankenstein, if you will. I know I do. ;-D
Oooh! I forgot to mention this in the other piece of crap I just posted; I couldn't update sooner either because Fanfic blocked me from doing so. They told me I had been too cheeky by posting a non-Mediator story in the Mediator section and therefore I HAD to be punished. So they stopped me from updating. I know, I know. Such cheekiness! You gotta love those guys.
His eyes searched hers for any leeway, any wavering signs of doubt that might flick across her features.
There were none.
But...oh; how he'd hoped...
"I'm sorry," she whispered.
He flinched. She was so completely sincere, and that's what made it even more unbearable, even more painful. She was speaking the truth, and that's what broke him.
He had hoped...ha ha, he had actually hoped that maybe she'd change her mind. Maybe she would decide that, No, he was the man of her dreams. Yes, she couldn't live without him.
But her mind remained as tenacious as his heart. She'd rejected him – in the gentlest of ways – but his heart remained adamant that there was hope. And it was killing him. His mind knew it was a lost cause; she just didn't love him. But his heart still cut against him painfully refusing to let this go. Refusing to let her go.
He knew tears were silently falling down his cheeks, and he could see her own tears too, mirroring his exactly. Neither of them brushed them away.
He always knew deep down he could never have her – she was in love with someone else. And he loved her irrevocably back. Deep down, he had always known this. At least, that's what he told himself.
He wasn't good enough for her. He never could be. She hurriedly assured him that wasn't the case, but he knew it was.
They were just never destined to be. After all that happened between them...
But he didn't have any regrets. He'd met the woman of his dreams and had fallen in love. And, briefly, had enjoyed it.
After all the intolerable secrets, and silent – some not so silent – rejections, after all the initial shock and anger and unwillingness, after that...he'd felt a love with the heat and light and power of seven suns. It was phenomenal. He'd felt strong and complete and safe.
But now?
Now he had to go. It was time. He'd come to her, stayed with her to work things out, seemingly years ago now. He'd obviously over-stayed his welcome, though. It was time to go back to his family. Go to where he belonged.
He was her second choice. He was never foremost on her mind; the other one was. That other man. He resented him. How he hated him. Stealing that precious, beautiful creature away from him without any sympathy or compassion; he'd seen her, he'd taken her.
There were a couple of moments when he'd thought he'd finally won her. Obviously it hadn't been enough. Now he had no choice but to leave, and never come back. He honestly didn't have a choice in the matter.
"Goodbye," she whispered through her tears. "Thank you."
One last tear fell from his eye. "Goodbye," he choked. "I love you, querida."
