A loud banging startled her out of a deep restful sleep and Alex jumped off the couch, kicking the blanket to the floor. Muscles tensed up immediately, and she grabbed the phone from the coffee table, ready to call for help. When she realized that it was just the neighbor leaving for work, Alex sat back down, trying to catch her breath. She padded to the bathroom barefoot, choosing to ignore the chill that was fast taking over her apartment. Turning the heater up, the low humming noise coming from the hot air blown into her apartment was a welcomed relief for Alex.
Deciding to skip breakfast, she continued unpacking the boxes in the living room, trying her best to arrange everything exactly the way that it was. Before I chickened out and went into hiding. The more she tried to unpack, the more frustrated she became. She started handling her things with a little more force, and she had to stop before she broke anything or hurt herself.
"This is crazy," she said out loud.
Putting on a pair of matching sweatshirt and pants, Alex grabbed her keys and her cell phone and left the apartment. Reaching the bottom of the stairs, she jumped onto the sidewalk and started a slow jog toward the park.
-----
"C'mon, Cap, I'm dying of boredom in my own apartment. You have got to help me out here." Cragen could hear the tinge of frustration in Olivia's voice, but he wasn't ready to give in just yet.
"Olivia, might I remind you that you are still technically recovering from your injuries. A gunshot wound and a concussion no less. Stay at home and rest, ok?"
"Thank you for stating the obvious, Captain. But sitting around doing nothing is worse than sitting through a philosophy class for me." Olivia tried her best to reason with the captain. "I just don't want to be alone, you know. I'd rather sit in the squad room and listen to Munch than spend another day at home alone."
"That bored, huh? All right, but just desk duty, and you leave at 5."
"Thanks Cap, I'll see you tomorrow then," Olivia said eagerly before setting the phone down.
Suddenly feeling better than the past two weeks, she decided to get out of the apartment. Just then she remembered, she hadn't been jogging since the shooting. A voice inside her head reminded her that she had a concussion and even though the headaches and the fainting spells were not as frequent, she still wasn't supposed to do any vigorous activities.
"Ah to hell with it," Olivia said as she walked toward her bedroom and changed into her jogging clothes.
Ten minutes later, the brunette started jogging down the stairs in her apartment building, her cell phone and her house keys safely tucked into the hidden pocket on her windbreaker. She took her time to allow her body to adjust to the increased exercise, slowly jogging toward the park before picking up her pace a little shortly after. Her left arm was still sore, even though her wound had healed almost completely.
Taking a short break to catch her breath, Olivia took the chance to notice her surroundings. There weren't many people around at this hour since most were either at work or school. The early morning crowd that she had gotten so used to seeing was replaced by a few joggers and an old couple strolling through the park. As she glanced over to the nearby playground, a wave of golden locks caught her attention. Straining for a better look, she jogged behind the tall figure as something instinctively drew her toward the woman. Her curiosity spurred her on, although she made sure to keep a safe distance between them while attempting to take a better look. The jogger looked like...Alex.
She stopped dead in her tracks, the color in her face draining and her head spinning as the realization set in. But it can't be, she's in... Olivia was confused. She wanted to go up to the jogger and confirm her suspicions, but when she looked up, the other woman was gone.
"Where the hell did she go?" Olivia voiced her thoughts out loud, ignoring the concerned looks that were thrown her way from a nearby elderly couple. Her eyes darted across the green of the park, desperately searching for the person she needed to see.
She started running again, noticeably faster this time as she picked the most likely path of the blonde. Ignoring the throbbing pain that was slowly increasing on her left arm with each swift stride that she took, Olivia did a quick perimeter search, hoping to find the mysterious jogger. Suddenly feeling very light-headed, she stood for a moment, hoping that she would not pass out there at the park. Finally giving up after searching for the better half of the hour, she left the park.
Was I just imagining things or... Olivia couldn't shake the image out of her head. She was convinced that the mysterious jogger was indeed her lover. The hair and the dark blue sweatshirt with a reflective strip stitched on the right arm... Am I going crazy here?
-----
As it was mid-morning, Alex figured there would not be many people in the park. Turning toward a path that went around a playground, she slowed down her pace, taking in the morning sun as much as she could. Spending the past year in hiding had taught her to appreciate the simple things in life. Like being alive. A cold shiver ran down her spine, and Alex stopped just long enough to adjust her sweatshirt.
Her eyes scanned around the park, willing her conscious mind to accept the normalcy that surrounded her at that moment, that she was Alex Cabot once more. A smile appeared on her face, and suddenly it didn't feel as cold as it did earlier. Continuing her run, she sensed rather than saw a familiar figure watching her. Olivia? Her body went rigid instantly while she tried her best to maintain the pace. She had momentarily considered stopping, but something in her made her want to flee.
Certain that the detective had spotted her, Alex acted as if she hadn't noticed and continued with her run, hoping that she would be able to avoid meeting Olivia. She knew Olivia was behind her, and it took all of her will power to not turn back and acknowledge the other woman. The park exit now in sight, she took a quick turn, and dashed toward it. Fighting the urge to stop in hopes that the detective could catch up with her, her legs carried her as far as they would go before eventually arriving at her apartment.
Jumping into the showers as soon she came through her door, Alex let the warm water soak her body before finally giving in to the emotions the mere proximity of Olivia had caused. Panic had accompanied her while she made her way back to her apartment earlier, but now it was replaced by pangs of guilt. She knew that her lover had seen her, and she knew that Olivia would be disappointed when she couldn't find her. Now, she would most probably be feeling hurt and maybe even angry that she had lost Alex once again. She hated seeing her lover cry, and hated even more that she was the cause of the detective's pain. Tears that she had held back had begun to find its way down to her cheeks, merging with the warm water splashing across her body.
"I miss you so much, Olivia." The blonde whispered to herself.
Feeling the water turn cold, Alex got out of the showers and dried herself off. Looking through her closet to find something suitable to wear, she settled on a pair of worn jeans and a tank top. Drying her hair with a towel as she went to the kitchen in search of food, something underneath her door caught her eye. Slowly inching closer until she could get a better look, she was surprised to find a piece of paper lying on the floor.
Getting down on one knee to pick up the paper, she noticed Olivia's handwriting immediately. Her heart skipped a beat as the earlier morning's events played back in her head. Picking up the note, Alex took a deep breath before she read it carefully.
Alex,
I know you're in there and I know it was you at the park earlier. There are so many things I want to know, so many things I want to tell you.
Whenever you're ready, you know where to find me.
I miss you.
Olivia
