Chapter 18

A City in Mourning

We pause are regularly scheduled story to bring you the following:

The Last Days of a Fairy

By: Jack Nimble

Good day my faithful followers of my ever verbose writing prowess. Today I mourn, like the rest of you, the passing of one of this cities greatest talents. Blue Fairy was, without any question in anyone's mind, the personification of perfection. Possessing looks that have made God Himself envious and a voice that sounds like the laughter of angels, Blue shall be missed long after we all are gone. Like every heterosexual, and maybe just all males in general, I have more than a few indecent dreams of the singing goddess that I shall not dwell into now.

Today I will be alongside several other friends of the late Blue, to speak at her eulogy. It has only been a matter of days and already I miss her greatly. The world has lost an amazingly beautiful and soulful human being, the music industry has lost one of its most promising talents, and I have lost a dear, dear friend. Blue I miss and love you, and pray that you will join the ranks of Elvis, Marilyn, JC, and Gepeto and open the gates for me when I reach those heavenly halls that you now call home.

Jack Nimble

The views expressed in the previous article are those of the writer and do not express the views of the Fairy City Gazette; it's employees, or our parent company, Ruler Ra Entertainment. We would like to express our condolences to the friends of Blue Fairy. Our prayers are with you.

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The latest issue of the Fairy City Gazette, as well as the local news media has been flooding the saddened citizens with the news of Blue Fairy's death. Minutes after her unexpected murder rumors began flying of her life leading up to her gruesome death. It is what everyone is talking about, save for one person.

Everett Daniels, until recently has been known to the world at large as the hip-hop sensation Humpty Dumpty. Since witnessing the murder and suicide of Blue and her husband Pinocchio, Everett has tried to stay clear of any cameras or other people for that matter. Most of his time has been spent sitting in the exact spot he is now, upon a bar stool in Miss Muffets, a cheap, dirty bar in downtown Fairy City.

He has been inebriated for the better part of the several days he's spent here, only talking to the bartender, Spider, to refill whatever he happened to be drinking at the time. Tonight is no different. It was only seven and he was already more than a little in the tank. So much so, that he had failed to even notice two customers entering the bar.

The couple sat next to Everett and proceeded to ignore him. They ordered and then began their own conversation. "Why are we in here again?" The thin, frail younger man asked.

The scraggly, rough looking older man answered, "Because I can't stand going to another one of those sickening fag playgrounds you frequent, that pass fruity drinks off as liquor and expect a man to pay twice as much for it. Sometimes, Peter, a man needs to be a G-D f'ing man."

"Well, at least let us dance in here," Peter began tugging on the older man's beat up overcoat. "I want to dance. with you. come on."

"All over your purty litl' face as soon as we leave here. So go and shake that ass of yours and work up an urge to fuck me later, huh," the older man said, slapping Peter's ass with his hooked hand while doing so.

Peter began smiling, kissed the man on his cheek and pranced towards the jukebox. The older man turned towards Spider and ordered his second round. Everett finally noticed that he was even there. As Spider brought the man his drink, the TV above the bar came back from commercial and began talking of Blue's funeral, which was just starting.

Everett raised his head and then asked Spider to turn it off. The bartender did so, only because Everett has been a good customer over the last few days and could really use to keep his business.

The old man raised his glass and said, "To those no longer with us. May they find the life they never had upon these shores." He then downed his drink and ordered another. He looked over towards Everett, "No love for those not with us I take it?"

"Something like that," Everett mumbled.

The old man croaked out a deep and throaty noise, that Everett guessed had been meant to be a laugh. Everett tried to smile, but only managed a crooked grin and then he quickly dropped his back down into staring at his drink.

"Now I wonder," the old man said turning towards Everett. "Why exactly is a young able bodied strapping man, like y'self not out chasing trim or committing some sorta crime at this ungodly hour of the evening?"

Everett raised his head and said, "Look, mister, I'm not trying to be an ass or anything, but I'm really not in the mood for talking. And from the looks of your boyfriend over there, you're just wasting your time. I ain't gay."

"Neither are I, but being so alone on a ship for so long, these young thin boys look more and more inviting as the days melt together. No one seems to care about the psychological damage we must endure to accomplish what we do, lad."

His curiosity peaked; Everett raises his head with an eyebrow cocked and asks, "What exactly is that you do?"

"I am the scourge of the open seas. The baron of the oceans. I am Captain Ulysses S. Brazen. Better known as Captain Hook, the greatest pirate ever to sail within God's pools of wonder." The old man named Hook said with great conviction and then slamming his hooked hand upon the bar.

The first true smile to cross Everett's lips in the last few days was plainly seen by the old man moments before Everett burst out in laughter. "Your. serious? You're a pirate. A real life woman raping, pillaging, murdering, baby stealing, treasure chest searching pirate."

"That I am. The best ever."

Everett again exploded with fits of laughter.

"Sorry. it's just that. I mean, I didn't know they still made pirates anymore."

"Aye. Like everything else though, it's all changed. Damn unions! I remember a time when a pirate could sail into any village or city and rape or pillage whatever caught his fancy. Now, you need to go through mountains of paperwork and politics. The soul of me business has died and only a few still strive to return pirating back to it's glory days."

Everett scrunches his face and asked Hook, "Weren't those glory days filled with murder, betrayal, disease, and homosexual sex?"

"Aye. The greatest days of me young nubile life, laddie."

Again Everett exploded into fits of uncontrollable laughter. The two men continued to drink for several hours, sharing stories of rapping and pirating, and of how much each has changed. It is the first time that Everett hasn't thought about Blue since her death.

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In a lone corner of Miss Muffets, hidden within the shadows and filth, a smoking figure pays close attention to Everett and his new companions. A strikingly good-looking man, he is humming a familiar tune to himself, fiddling with his drink and staring unblinkingly at Everett. Paying very close attention towards his conversation. He knows Everett immensely, following his career from the beginning.

"Hey sexy. Wanna dance?" Peter said to the dark smoking figure breaking him out of his trance. He looks up at the young man to see him leaning against the table, hips still thrusting in rhythmic gyrations. The man simply smiles and pulled a small dagger into view.

Holding it up to Peter's face, the smoking man said, "So, you think you still wanna dance with this, you fucking fruitcake? Walk away. Don't say shit, just walk away and tell your old butt fucking friend over there about this and to bring his ass over here."

After the smoking man let Peter go, he ran over to Hook and told him what had just transpired. Within minutes, Hook went from the laughing and jovial demeanor of any other drunk, to the blood curdling fierceness and anger of the seas' greatest pirate. He excused himself from Everett, who simply turned around on his stool to watch what was going on, and walked over towards the smoking man.

Everett sat and watched. He couldn't make out what Hook and the smoking man were saying, but it didn't look as bad as Everett had thought it would. They talked for several minutes and then Hook shook the smoking man's hand and began to walk back towards Everett.

After returning to his seat and ordering yet another drink, Hook turned towards Everett and said, "Laddie, what would you say to joining me and Peter on a little trip. Nothing fancy or anything, just a quick trip and back. You'll get to be a real pirate, for a little while anyways."

Everett looks at Hook and just said, "Sure, I need to get away from all this shit. Just one thing, would it be possible if you and Peter kept your homosexual sex away from me. I'm not gay."

Hook stood and placed his hand on Everett's back, "Give it time laddie. Just give it time." He then turned back towards the smoking man, gesturing for Everett and Peter to follow him. After arriving to the corner where the smoking man sat Hook said, "Everett, met our newest employer, his name is Piper and we're going to pull off the most amazing theft in all of history."

To be continued.

Author's Notes-

Hey peoples, been away for a while, hopefully this will help. Next chapter is almost done as well. Only a few more weeks before the baby is born and I am so damn anxious. It's a great feeling. If you haven't seen Pirates of the Caribbean, then you should, Johnny Depp is great in it. Gayest pirate ever put on film and it actually worked. I haven't been getting reviews again, hopefully this story isn't starting to bore anyone. Keep em coming and thanks in advance.