Orange Marmalade
A really random story by Kloudy Reignfall
Okay, so I wrote this for an English assignment. I had to include 20 weird words, which is one of the main reasons for the strangeness of it. Oh, I also changed the characters names to what they might be if they were in America, which only adds to the absurdity. Well, whatever. I'm suddenly in a very sad mood, so my hyper humor level is way down. Um, just go ahead and read it if you want.
Once upon a time, because we know that's how all the good stories start, there was a boy. Well, there were lot's of boys once upon a time; there still are. But that's beside the point. Because this boy was special! How was he special, you ask? Well, he… he was… he had… Okay, so I don't really know. But whatever! Maybe he wasn't special, but the story begins with him, so deal with it!
This boy's name was Shuichi Shindou. But since we're in the good old US of A I'm going to call him by his English name, Stuart Sinclair, which doesn't sound nearly so nice.
So, it all started because of Orange Marmalade. One night Stuart was sitting in his bedroom, writing random lyrics and eating toast with orange marmalade. I can't tell you why he was eating orange marmalade, but I can tell you the reason he was writing lyrics. This was because he was in rock band! The band was called Bad Luck, for more reasons than any of us would know, and was a trio with Stuart and his two best friends Hiro Nakano and Suguru Fujisaki. Hiro (who we call Harold Noland, for lack of better else) was the guitarist in the band while Suguru (also known as Steven Fuller) played the keyboard. The two musicians were talented enough to succeed by themselves, but with the vocal talents of Stuart added in they were unbeatable! Unfortunately, they also left Stuart to writing the lyrics, and that's what got us here in the first place.
Stuart wanted to write about his orange marmalade, but he soon realized that nothing rhymed with "orange". That being the case he decided to write the song about "spicy" marmalade instead. He was sure he could find something to sound like "spicy".
Stuart was about to get up and go into the kitchen when the phone rang. He quickly tried to answer it, but his sister Maya got to it first.
Damn that brat! Stuart thought angrily. She always does that, and the phone is never even for her!
Needless to say, the phone was not for her. It was for Stuart. He snatched the phone from his sister and traipsed into the kitchen for another snack.
"Hello?" he asked, while searching the cupboards for something edible.
"It's me," said a rather dry voice on the opposite side.
Stuart nearly dropped his can of Jessica Simpson brand tuna ("Is it chicken, or is it fish?") when he heard the voice. It was Eiri Yuki (who insisted upon being called his American name, Eddie Yates), Stuart's favorite critic and boyfriend.
Yes, I said boyfriend. They were dating. They loved each other. They were both guys. Get the fuck over it.
But Stuart wasn't sure how they had ever really started to date in the first place. Eddie was such a man-bitch sometimes! The first time they met was at a shadowed park in the middle of the night where Eddie had caught some of Stuart's song lyrics. He'd called the song an inept poem, and that had been that. Since then, they'd been pretty much inseparable. Eddie still criticized his little friend's "1st grade poetry" but it wasn't as cruel as it seems. And it's not as if he could help it. Eddie was, after all, an accomplished novelist while Stuart was just a high school boy failing English and probably most of his other classes too.
This thought brought up an important point, a discussion topic he'd meant to bring up for a while. "Eddie? Are you busy tomorrow at 11:45?"
"Not that I know of," Eddie replied. "Why?"
"Well…" Stuart was a little hesitant to say. "I wanted to know if you were coming to my graduation."
A silence was heard. And then, "I suppose so."
"Yay!" Stuart cried as Eddie hung up. He was amazed that Eddie consented to go. He usually hated being with him in public. Personally, Stuart loved being with Eddie at all time, especially in public. But the poor uptight novelist was worried about his reputation, about what other people might think. He hadn't told anybody, not even his own family. It was a poor way to live, but there was nothing Stuart could do about it, so he just went back into his room to watch the 6:00 news.
Flipping through several news channels he saw various stories. One was about the latest flying saucers that had been spotted, another had a story about some huge creepy spiders some soldiers had found in the Sahara Desert. Another channel was on a commercial and showed pictures of beautiful white ski slopes. Stuart wondered what that was for, since there were no ski resorts for several hundred miles around here. So he changed the channel again. Getting back to where he started, and still finding nothing interesting enough to warrant his attention, he clicked the TV off and plopped down onto his bed, resigning himself to his dreams.
The next morning Eddie opened his eyes to see his brother Taylor standing over him.
"Rise and shine, sleepyhead!" Taylor chimed happily, only too pleased to annoy his older brother so early in the morning.
"Ugh," Eddie groaned as he sat up in bed. "What do you want, brat?"
Taylor reminded him cheerfully of their 'appointment' this morning. Eddie had no idea what he was talking about.
"Oh, you know!" Taylor said, "Your boyfriend's graduation!"
This statement had Eddie awake and glancing around frantically for the clock, which told him that it was currently 11:00.
"Oh fuck!" he yelled as he tossed his brother aside and ran to get ready. Thoughts ran frantically through his head, one of which was 'I guess I should be glad that Taylor listens in on my phone conversations.'
Taylor was already ready. He had been for an hour at least. Then why had he not woken his brother? Probably because he liked to see him run around like a chicken with its head cut off. Such was the way of annoying younger siblings. And Taylor considered himself a guru when it came to annoying both his brother and older sister Michaela. Speaking of, Taylor remembered that he had yet to call her and inform her of their little trip this morning. Commence phase two.
Thirty minutes and four speeding tickets later, Eddie and Taylor arrived at their destination: West Hills High School. Breathing heavily, Eddie stepped out of his convertible Mustang and began to walk briskly to the entrance of the auditorium. He still had 15 minutes until the ceremony started, but Stuart would surely have a fit if he didn't see him before then.
Taylor was following quietly behind his brother, somewhat anxious to see this "Stuart" person, but at the same time keeping an eye out for his other invited guests.
As soon as they entered the room a high-pitched scream caught the brothers' attention. "Eddie!"
Stuart ran gleefully over to Eddie and wrapped his arms around him. Several of the guests in the room started to stare, but the other graduating students brushed this behavior off. They were used to Stuart's hyperactivity.
Taylor stared at the boy in surprise. (Was this really a boy? Looked kinda like a flat-chested school-girl in drag.) Was this his cold-hearted brother's lover? But he was so… happy. And he had pink hair. Before this time, Taylor had never really believed the phrase 'opposites attract', but boy was he believing it now.
For a few minutes everybody talked and continued to prepare for the ceremony. But just as Taylor was starting to get anxious, a person burst through the door. Actually it was two people, and they didn't really burst through the door so much as they shoved through. Regardless of the details concerning their arrival, Taylor was glad to see that his sister Michaela and her husband Thomas Songfield (whose real name was a lot better) had finally arrived.
Eddie was not at all pleased to see his sister and brother in law walk through those doors. Because they shouldn't be here, they shouldn't know that he was here. And that meant that somebody had to have told them. And the only person who could have done so was…
"Taylor!!!" Eddie screeched as launched at his younger brother. The two were soon fighting in a large dust ball. Stuart watched with a weird feeling growing in his stomach, which might have been hunger but was more likely nervousness. Why was Eddie holding his brother in a choke-hold? And more importantly, who were those people who walked in the door? Did they know Eddie?
All was soon revealed as Michaela walked calmly up to Stuart, stepping over her dueling younger brothers. She approached the boy and smiled. "So, Taylor tells me you're going out with my brother?" It was a mix between a statement and a question.
Stuart nodded, finally figuring out who the lady was. "Um, yes ma'am," he said as politely as he could.
"What are your intentions?" she asked in a business-like manner. When Stuart only stared and stammered, she broke into a laugh. "You really love that crazy bastard, don't you?"
He nodded, unable to do anything else.
"Well, you know, if you want to marry him, you'll probably have to elope," she commented jokingly.
Stuart smiled. It was a thought that often crossed his idle mind. Running off with Eddie to Las Vegas, staying in some swanky hotel, being married by some random old priest, and then going dancing afterward, just two love-struck young people off in their own world! Sure, it was a little farfetched, but a boy could dream, couldn't he?
Eventually Eddie and Taylor stopped fighting and looked up to see that the graduation ceremony had already begun. They'd missed a lot of it, such as the valedictorian's speech ("Erhem. I'd like to announce that I failed my Biology exam and that I'm throwing away my college plans in favor of playing in my rock band. Sorry Mom."), and the actual handing out of diplomas. Currently a pink haired boy was taking the stage along with his brown-haired guitarist friend, and another boy who had black hair.
"Oh, fuck" Eddie muttered quietly. "What is that little punk-ass bitch up to?"
Stuart decided to say his own little speech, emboldened by Harold's admittance. "Hi. I'm Stuart, but I'm sure you all recognize me from my band. Um, I just wanted to tell everyone that I'm in love with the most wonderful man alive and he's standing right there in the back." He pointed. "Yeah, right there in the blue shirt. Hi Eddie!" Eddie put his face in his hands as if that would stop people from staring. Stuart ignored him and turned to his keyboardist. "Hey, Steven, do you have anything to say since we're all admitting things?"
Steven looked thoughtful. "Um, I saved 20 percent on my car insurance by switching to Gieco."
Everyone blinked. Then Stuart smiled. "Okay. Well anyway, we have a little surprise for you all today!" He jumped down from the stage and kicked over the 14 or so music stands belonging to the West Hills orchestra, and beckoned his band mates over to him, where they proceeded to sing several of their band's own songs and a couple audience requests. ('Not a girl, not yet a woman,' that Britney Spears song, was unanimously the favorite.) Surprisingly, everybody liked it except for Eddie, who was just about having a spazz attack at the moment.
"Oh, god. Oh fuck! It's all out," he sobbed. "My reputation is ruined!" But when Stuart dragged him upstage to serenade him in from of the large audience he realized that it didn't matter at all. Deep down he was happy, and that was all that mattered.
And that was the end!
…But don't ask me what it all has to do with Orange Marmalade.
And so ends an account of my midnight imagination.
Dude, that was random as all hell. I don't even know why I posted this. It was something I wrote for my English class. Of course the old version was quite a bit more toned down. It's quite crazy. I wrote it at midnight the night before it was due, and I was under the influence of starbucks. I just kinda was typing feverishly not really aware of what I was saying. But after I reread it I found it kind of amusing. So I decided, "Hey, what the hell. Let's post it." So I did.
As you may have noticed, they live in America now. Yuki drives an American car, they have American names, Shu goes to my American school. (Yeah, West Hills high School in Santee, CA, my hometown! Rock on, Cali! lol)
So review please maybe if you would? I mean, it's not like I really worked on it or anything, but I do so love reviews. :) Heh, maybe I'll write more one caffienated night... Btw, if anybody has any requests or whatever, that's awesome. I love requests. They totally add to the randomness!
