Title: Knocking On Heaven's Door

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Stephanie is on her death bed, she's dying of liver disease from drinking too much one night, and instead of fighting it, she gives in to the angel of death, unless she finds a reason to live.

Disclaimer: I don't own anyone in this story, I just made it up after seeing an episode of Nip Tuck where Juila almost dies and suddenly I was inspired. Okay, I know I'm stealing the plot, but it's really good I couldn't help it. I hope everyone likes it. It's something different then what I've written.

Authors Notes - IMPORTANT: Stephanie is watching how her life could have been, so when I put "Stephanie and so and so did this" it's like she's watching herself do all this, I hope that makes sense. I don't want to confuse anyone.


Knocking On Heaven's Door

ooh, ooh
yeah, yeah yeah
yeah, yeah yeah
Mama take this badge off me,
I can't use it any more,
It's getting dark, too dark to see,
Feels like I'm knocking on heaven's door.

Knock, knock knockin' on heaven's door.
Knock, knock knockin' on heaven's door.
Knock, knock knockin' on heaven's door.
Knock, knock knockin' on heaven's door.

Mama put my guns in the ground,
I can't shoot them any more,
That long black cloud is coming down,
I feel like I'm knocking on heaven's door.

Knock, knock knockin' on heaven's door.
Knock, knock knockin' on heaven's door.
Knock, knock knockin' on heaven's door, yeah yeah.
Knock, knock knockin' on heaven's door.

yeah, yeah yeah
yeah, yeah yeah
yeah, yeah yeah
yeah, yeah yeah


Stephanie took a few breaths as she closed her eyes. She was laying in a hospital bed, realizing she was going to die alone. Everything seemed to slow down, her eyes began to flutter as she felt a bright white light shine over her.

This was it, she was fading away slowly, and no one would be there to be with her.

The hospital doors opened as a tall, medium build man walked in, holding a bouquet of pink roses in his hands. He thought about what to say when he saw Stephanie, but nothing came to his mind. His light brown-blondish hair was pulled back in a ponytail, wearing casual blue jeans and a RAW t-shirt. Finally he stopped at her room, his eyes went wide as he looked at the screen next to the woman he had loved from a distance and saw a flat line.

"I need some help in here! Somebody get a doctor!," he yelled out, putting the flowers down onto the table and rushing over to Stephanie's lifeless body. The doctors rushed in and tried to revive her as Shawn Michaels watched from a distance, tears forming in his eyes.

Stephanie woke up, she was in an all white room with her hospital gown on. Her eyes searched around for anyone who could be in the room with her. Suddenly Lita appeared in a long, black dress.

"You're probably wondering why I'm here." She started walking toward Stephanie.

"Lita? You aren't dead." Stephanie stated. "This is impossible."

Lita smiled, "Actually, I'm not Lita. You just wanted someone you recognized to be your guide instead of a stranger. I'm here to show you what life would have been like if you hadn't married Hunter."

"You mean, if I married Test?," she asked curiously.

Lita laughed a little, "Actually you and Test were never meant to be. There was always someone who wished they could have had the chance to be with you though. And you could've been happy."

Stephanie frowned, she didn't like the sound of that. Could have been.

"Let me show you," Lita took Stephanie by the arm and next thing she knew they were both in a WWE arena.

"What are we doing here?," Stephanie asked.

"Just wait," Lita looked toward the locker room that said 'Shawn Michaels.'

"Wait, this is Shawn's locker room, he doesn't...," she paused.

Finally she saw Shawn with her, back in 1999, she watched as her former self and Shawn Michaels entered their locker room, with his arm gently around her waist.

They followed them in and looked on.

She had dressed differently, she wasn't dressed slutty like Hunter had her dress. She was wearing a classy white peasant skirt and black tank top, showing no cleavage, nothing skanky.

Shawn touched Stephanie's cheek softly, "I'm so excited for tonight baby, I'm facing Test in a ladder match, and your going to be in my corner. My first match with you as my manager." He kissed her lips sweetly.

Stephanie giggled, "Oh Shawn, I know you'll beat him good tonight."

Shawn pulled her down onto his lap and kissed her neck, "I love you Stephanie."

"I love you too Shawn." She leaned against him.

Lita turned toward Stephanie, "It gets better..."

Next thing Stephanie knew she was in HHH's locker room, "You never said who Hunter is with now that I'm married to Shawn."

Lita smirked deviously, Stephanie knew that wasn't a good thing.

HHH stood there with Chyna kissing her sweetly, wishing her good luck on her match before she left the locker room. He watched to make sure she was gone. Then walked over to the bathroom.

"You can come out now baby..," he called out softly.

Suddenly Stephanie walked out in just a towel, "Is she gone?," she smirked.

HHH kissed her lustfully, holding her close to him, "Damn right she's gone. How about you and I uh, warm up before my match?," he smirked.

Stephanie was breathless, "I didn't.. I couldn't have.. I cheated on Shawn?"

Lita whispered into Stephanie's ear, "You were a bitch even back then. Cheating on the only man who has always been faithful to you. Tsk Tsk.."

Stephanie felt a tear fall down her cheek as she watched her former self and HHH together on his couch.

"I don't want to see anymore," she cried.

"Too bad darling, you're going to see everything I have to show you," Lita's dark lined eyes glared into Stephanie's crystal blue eyes.

"Why are you doing this?," she asked through tears.

Next thing she knew it was 1 year later, and she was in her house. Shawn was walking around the house in just shorts, he walked up to Stephanie and wrapped his arms around her, kissing her neck.

"Not tonight Shawn," she escaped his grasp.

"Why won't you let me make love to you Stephanie? In the beginning of our marriage you always did, and when we were dating.. is there something wrong? Are you seeing someone else?," he asked accusingly.

Stephanie just smirked, "Of coarse not Shawn, I have no reason to see anyone else."

"I'm facing Hunter Monday Night. That son of a bitch has been accusing you of cheating on me.. with him." Shawns eyebrows went up.

"That isn't true, I only love you Shawn," she sauntered toward him.

"That's what I told him, but he said otherwise, so I'm going to kick his ass in a no holds barred match. I want you there with me Stephanie, will you be in my corner?"

Stephanie sighed, "Of coarse sweetie," she touched his cheek, "I'll always be in your corner."

Shawn left the room with a nod; Stephanie looked over her shoulder to make sure he was gone, she then reached into her purse and took out a pregnancy test, she took a deep breath.

"Shit, please don't tell me.." Stephanie closed her eyes as she watched herself walk into the bathroom then come out a few minutes later, crying.

She turned to Lita, "Am I...?"

"You are, and with HHH's baby," she laughed, "Ironic isn't it? You marry someone else and you get pregnant by their ex best friend but when you were actually married to HHH, you had to fake a pregnancy. Talk about ironic."

"Shall we skip forward a little?," Lita asked her bitterly.

"First answer these questions for me.." She gulped a little. "Do I keep the baby?," Stephanie looked at her with sadness in her eyes.

Lita looked down, then turned away. "You keep the baby, but you never tell Shawn it isn't his."

"Am I happy with Shawn?," she asked, her face red from crying.

"You should be. He loves you, completely. All he's ever wanted is you. But being with HHH, made you feel like the bad girl you would have been if you had married him. And that is what brought you off. Not that Shawn didn't quite a few times." She laughed a little.

Stephanie sneered, "You're horrible for showing me this, I don't want to see anymore. Just let me die."

"Sorry, that's not in the job description," Lita looked at Stephanie, she was empty. She didn't care that this was hard for Stephanie to see, all she cared about was making her miserable it seemed.

"Fine, where to next?," she asked.

"Now, on to the end of the match," Lita adjusted her long black silk gloves.

"Why the end?," Stephanie asked.

"Because that's the most important part," she smirked.

Suddenly they were ringside, watching the match go on. They both paced around the ring as they watched Shawn being demolished in the ring with the sledgehammer, steel chair, and steel steps HHH had brought in.

Stephanie watched as her worse half kept a straight face on outside the ring, not even seeming to care what was happening to her husband in the ring. HHH looked down and made sexual comments toward Stephanie, and a smile spread across her face. She recognized that look, it was the one Stephanie had when she was satisfied.

The actual Stephanie fell to her knees crying, "Stop it! Please! I can't see anymore of this! Shawn is my best friend, I don't want to see him hurt." She put her hands in front of her eyes and cried.

When she removed her hands from her eyes they were in the white room she had started out from.

"What are we doing back here?," she asked.

"There is one last thing I need to show you," Lita didn't sound as cruel as she did in the beginning.

They were at a bar now in Texas. Shawn was sitting there drinking by himself, he already looked plastered from the look on his face and from seeing how many beer bottles there was in front of him. Stephanie looked on from a distance, how could she cause him so much grief? What year was it that this was she was in now?

"It's the year 2004, it would have been the year he won the title from HHH, if it hadn't been for you who just a few days ago... served him with divorce papers." Lita crossed her arms. "And then started a relationship with HHH, who later on cheated on you with Trish Stratus. You found out, then it eventually lead to you drinking so much you died of liver disease."

"Why was I that way? What could have possibly made me so damn cold hearted to hurt my one and only friend that I had? Why?! Why!!?," Stephanie started to cry and continued to say 'Why' through the tears over and over again.

Lita brought her back to the white room instantly and said coldly, "It all had to do with your Father. Because he set you up to have the Undertake abduct you, you felt cold after that. Unfortunately you never got over it. Even if marrying Hunter was a mistake, your best friend had always stuck by you. Shawn Michaels. It is actually a good thing you didn't start seeing him before you and Hunter had the McMahon-Helmsley Era, and if you hadn't drank so much last night - you and Shawn would have been happy together, he would never betray you, lie to you, or cheat on you. He was the one you were supposed to be with, just not until now. You could have had something beautiful, and now it's being taken away from you before you even had it."

"I lied to you Stephanie, when I said I was your guide, it wasn't true..," Lita walked up to Stephanie who was on the ground, still crying. "I'm the angel of death." Stephanie shot her head up, she knew it was true. Deep down she knew, she just didn't want to believe it.

"With one kiss, your life will be over with. You'll never have to make anyone miserable ever again."

Stephanie gave Lita an estranged look, "I'm not kissing you Lita..."

"Come on Steph, you know you've always wanted to. Haven't you wondered what it would be like to kiss a woman? This will end it all. All your pain, loneliness, suffering... just one kiss.." She whispered.

Stephanie closed her eyes and gave Lita a small peck on the lips, next thing she knew she was floating toward her in a white hallway toward a gate. Lita was motioning her closer. Stephanie looked around and part of her felt happy, she saw all the superstars who had died in heaven, they were all watching, some of them happy she would join them soon, and quite a few were disappointed. The closer she was to the gates the more she realized she didn't want to die.

Stephanie halted, she looked around and closed her eyes, letting a single teardrop fall down her cheek as she finally screamed out, "I'm not ready!"

Everything stopped for that moment, and she had no idea what was going to happen next.

Authors Notes: I know this may be a little confusing, but I hope everyone is liking it so far. I don't mean to make it so depressing, but it just sounded like a good idea at the time. I'm probably going to work on the next chapter either tonight or tomorrow, depends on how inspired I am.