Chapter Four: Goodbye

Marella, from one of your boats, and almost a mother-figure to you, had suggested a party. You love gypsy parties, the music and dancing and firelight awakens something in your soul every time. You asked if the other gypsies could come. After much persuading, your father agreed you could invite them, but you knew Bion would not welcome them, and be wary and hostile.

"You're havin' a river rat party," Roux said one morning when you were down with his boats, both throwing stale bread into the river for the ducks.

"Why do you always refer to yourself as a river rat? Don't you ever find it degrading?" you ask.

"It's what I am, and I'm proud of what I am." Roux stops throwing bread, he lifts a hand up to touch the necklace he gave you.

"How'd you know about the party?" you ask.

"Oh I heard some people talkin' about it in town," he replies, getting some more bread. "That necklace suits you."

"Roux, nothing's going to happen between us until you've spoken to Vianne and sorted out what you want, so stop flirting. Are you going to come to the party?" He thinks for a moment.

"Yes."

The bonfire was lit, some people were toasting food amongst the flames, others were playing music and others were dancing, but Roux wasn't there. Just as you were about to give up hope of his coming, eight or nine boats are seen floating down the river towards you, each lit with hundreds of lamps and candles which twinkle in the dusk. Roux is standing at the front of the first boat, like a Captain aboard his ship. He tosses you a rope and you tie it round a tree, mooring it safely. All of his twinkling boats are roped together, so as the first stops, they all stop, slowly bobbing in the middle of the river. Then twenty or thirty people come ashore, dancing and clapping, or holding guitars. You dance with Roux and Marella for a while, then you and Roux sit down to eat potatoes baked on the bonfire, watching the others take over the dancing. After you've both finished eating, Roux gets up, and extends a hand to help you up to your feet for more dancing. You play a few tunes with the ever growing ensemble of musicians, when Roux takes your hand and leads you through the trees by the river, a little way from the party.

"Roux," you say, trying to keep up with him. "We'll be missed." He stops suddenly, and you walk into him, he puts and arm around you, bringing you closer, but you can sense something is troubling him, you can see it in his chocolate brown eyes. "Roux, what is it?"

"Tomorrow, we're leavin'. We're travellin' back, so I can see Vianne, but, I know this life too well, and I know that if we part, I'll probably never see you again."

"Roux, I'm not being your standby," you say, suddenly angry. "You don't want me, you want Vianne, and if she won't have you you'll settle for me, well it doesn't work like that Roux," you shrug yourself out of his grip, almost in tears but refusing to give him the satisfaction. "If you go back to her, don't expect me to still be here when it doesn't work out. I'm not going to be tied down Roux, not by anyone or anything. If you leave, I won't wait for you." You turn around to head back to the party, but Roux calls out to you.

"Wait!" you turn around, and he walks closer to you.

"I'm not goin' back to Vianne to stay with her, I'm goin' back to say goodbye, come with me."

"What?"

"If I leave you, you won't wait," Roux repeats, inches from your face. "So come with me. I want you."

"So why are you saying goodbye to her? We go back and you realize you do want her, I've lost my family, my home. I can't trust you not to do that Roux," you say, turning around and walking back through the trees to the party. Roux doesn't follow you, he waits, and slowly a tear forms in his eye and runs down his cheek.