Disclaimer: I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh! or 10 Things I Hate About You.


Enter the land of verbs, novels, and nouns. Otherwise known as English class. The room is full of bored seniors, who are doodling and staring off into space. Ms. Blaise, they're older-then-the-dinosaurs teacher tries to figure out where she was.

"Well then. Oh yes. I guess that does it for our analysis of 'The Old Man and the Sea.' Any other comments," she pauses until Mai puts up her hand. "Mai?" she asks, with dread.

"Why did we just read 'The Hardy Boys'?" asks Mai.

"I'm sorry?" asks Ms. Blaise, puzzled.

"This book is about a guy and his fishing habit. Not exactly a crucial topic." Mai continues, ignoring groans from the other students. "Frankly, I'm baffled as to why we still revere Hemingway. He was an abusive, alcoholic misogynist who had a lot of cats."

Seto Kaiba, a well-muscled jock with great cheekbones decides to give his two-cents. "As opposed to a self-righteous hag who has no friends?" Mai ignores him.

"That's enough, Mr. Kaiba," says Ms. Blaise.

"I guess the school board thinks that because Hemingway's a male and an asshole that he's worthy of our time," Mai continues, getting really fired up.

"What about Colette? Charlotte Bronte? Simone de Beauvoir?" Mai asks.

"Mother Goose?" asks Joey, laughing.


Mai now sits in the guidance room, along with Ms. Perky.

"Mai Valentine. My, my...you've been terrorizing Ms. Blaise again."

"Expressing my opinion is not a terrorist action," says Mai.

"Well, yes, compared to your other choices of expression this year, today's events are quite mild. By the way, Rex Raptor's gonad retrieval operation went quite well, in case you're interested."

"I still maintain that he kicked himself in the balls," retorts Mai. "I was merely a spectator."

"The point is, Mai – people perceive you as somewhat..." Ms. Perky trails off.

"Tempestuous?" contributes Mai

"Heinous bitch is the term used most often." Ms. Perky grimaces, then goes back to her plastic smile. "You might want to work on it."

Mai rises from her chair with a smile matching Ms. Perky's. "As always, thank you for your excellent guidance."