Title: Freezing

Author: ScullyAsTrinity

Rating: R

Category: Angst/Romance

Characters: Neo, Trinity

Thanks: DAMN BISSE! Don't let me have a VACATION or anything. This one's for you. Yes, I'll continue it.

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I've been with you for some time now and... it's just not how I expected it to be. I felt the world move when I first touched you, when I first spoke to you. I expected it all, well, I expected all of it to be nothing but daises.

As we are fighting for the fate of the free world, I didn't expect much to happen between us, but what did... I expected all of it to be perfect. Perhaps because I'd never really experienced love, never really had anyone who loved me, I expected everything. Though I didn't really know what to expect, I have to admit, I didn't expect this.

I knew the passion wouldn't last forever. I knew the stolen moments in corridors would get tired and the both of us would long for more. I don't think either of us really anticipated waiting and wanting for so long. I don't think either of us knew the strain that we would be put under would be this intense.

I perceived this longing to be far less than what I experience before. I'm very shocked to see that I was wrong.

And now, now that you and I have our emotions out in the open, now that everyone knows... it's just not as simple anymore. I was an expert at masking my true feelings. I was the epitome of ice. Now, when Morpheus looks at me, the hue of his eyes is different, he can't meet my eyes like he used to. They all treat me different, now that they know I'm betrothed to the one. The daisies that I wanted only wither now. They die from lack of attention that they should receive.

It's only my fault that I'm being short with you, but it seems that you can't seem to look at me without blaming me for us not being as we should. I think I see it in your eyes. Do I see it in your eyes? Jesus, I just don't know anymore. I'm almost embarrassed to be around you now. To have you know how I feel and to have you know what I want and not being able to do a damn thing about it.

Nights, we can't be together. Days, we're torn apart by our duties that we must fulfill. I was naive to believe that after you proved yourself... I was silly. Can nothing be easy? Can nothing be easy for me, for us? If we were meant together then why aren't we together?

Why can't I feel you anymore Neo? Why have you become so distant to me as well as everyone on the ship? I feel you slipping inside yourself Neo, I hear you questioning the choices that you've made.

I feel like I'm alone here Neo. The fire inside me has slowly died and only the embers remain. I'm frightened that they will be extinguished as well and neither of us will be able to feel anymore. I'm alone here, I'm cold. I'm freezing and I'm not sure if I can be thawed. I'm not sure if they two of us, as strong as we are, can last this war. I want to believe that we can.

When we get back, things will be different. The touch of your hand will feel like it used to. The passion that died along with my daisies will be rekindled and perhaps I'll finally know what it feels like to be completely encompassed by you.

Neo, I need you with me. Soon.

-Fin-