Chapter 22 – Parechobios

Remus rubbed his forehead; he had a headache coming on. This always happened after a full moon. He dearly wished Sirius hadn't locked himself in the garage with his bike. Sirius had put the painkillers somewhere obscure and no matter how hard he looked, Remus couldn't find them. In spite of how hard he banged on the garage door, Sirius either couldn't hear him or was ignoring him. Maybe both.

He went into the lounge and lay down on the sofa with his arm across his eyes, trying to remember the spell that would cure his headache. He walked over to the window and pushed it open. Maybe fresh air would do him some good.

Suddenly, there was a small explosion from the garage. Remus yelped in shock and leant out of the window. "Sirius! What the hell are you doing!"

There was no answer. Panic started to scrabble at Remus' heart. Dark smoke was curling from under the door. He took a deep breath and yelled, "SIRIUS! Are you all right? Sirius?"

Suddenly, the garage door opened and Sirius staggered out, coughing. Remus sighed in relief. Sirius slumped down on the cold ground outside the garage. Remus asked tentatively, "Are you OK?"

Sirius looked up and nodded. He was covered in a fine layer of soot and dirt and looked slightly shell-shocked but otherwise fine. Remus smiled, shaking his head, and disappeared from the window to walk around to the front door. Sirius tried to wipe the grime off his face but only succeeded in rubbing it into his skin. After a moment, he gave up, aware he was only making it worse. Remus came out after a few seconds and sat beside Sirius. "What did you do?"

Sirius smiled suddenly. "I did it."

"What did you do?" Remus asked patiently, a smile flickering at his lips, all thought of his headache forgotten. Sirius' eyes were sparkling with excitement and triumph. Sirius looked over at the garage; smoke still plumed from the door. He coughed. "Well, I won't show you just yet. It's probably a bit of a mess in there … but … I made it fly. Well, I think I did. The spell worked, anyway …"

"What, the bike? You made the bike fly?"

"Yeah! I found the spell ages ago, along with one for invisibility, but … you have to hit the chrome just right, or …"

"You didn't hit it just right that time?" Remus asked, already knowing the answer was a yes. Sirius nodded guiltily. Remus laughed. "It doesn't matter. It'll clean and fix. And you can always try your invisibility spell again – or maybe not, if it has a chance of doing that next time. What took you so long, getting out?"

"I think I managed to do something … odd to the light bulb, and that smoke was really thick, so I couldn't see a bloody thing in there. It took me ages to find the door, let alone open it!" Sirius replied. Remus put an arm around his shoulders and pulled him close. Sirius protested that he was covered in muck, but Remus ignored him, kissing his forehead. He murmured, "Sirius, I love you whether you're covered in chocolate sauce or soot. Of course, chocolate sauce would be preferable …"

"Kinky bastard," Sirius chuckled, leaning his head on Remus' shoulder. The werewolf hit his arm, then nuzzled into his hair, causing Sirius to whine in pleasure and snuggle closer.

A few minutes later, an owl disturbed them by landing on the eaves and hooting loudly. Remus looked up and saw it had a letter held firmly in its beak. He held out his arm; it swooped down, landed on his arm for a moment while it dropped the letter and then flew away, hooting softly.

Sirius picked it up and slit it open. He pulled out the letter and read it carefully, his eyes widening with every word. Remus frowned and leant to read the letter over his shoulder. Sirius twisted away. Remus shook his head, sighing. Sirius finished reading and said, as thought Remus hadn't already guessed, "It's from that charity of Jorja's."

"Really," Remus replied sarcastically. Sirius took a deep breath and told him, "They said we can go down and see them."

Remus' mouth dropped open. "Really?"

There was no trace of sarcasm this time. His stomach twisted with nerves at the thought. Sirius nodded. He said, "Took their time replying, didn't they?"

Then he laughed, "If they could see me now, I wonder if they'd still want us to go down?"

Remus laughed too. After a moment, the laughter died. "What about me … and the … the drugs?"

Sirius kissed his cheek. "That's over. You're OK now. It's not going to happen ever again. I won't let you get so low again …"

"Thank you."

"I'd do anything for you. Besides, I think a single lapse that was my fault anyway isn't as serious as nearly blowing up half a house."

They both laughed again. Suddenly, impulsively, Remus threw his arms around Sirius' neck and hugged him tightly. He whispered "Don't …"

Still holding him tightly, Sirius asked gently, "Don't what?"

Remus replied, "Don't know …"

Sirius chuckled, kissing the top of Remus' head. He sighed and held Remus tighter. The werewolf eventually asked, "When do they want us?"

"The day after tomorrow. I've got an address so we can apparate, or something …"

Remus nodded slowly, his head still resting on Sirius' chest. He whispered, "Love you, Siri. Even when you blow up the garage."

The animagus grinned. "I love you too."

Remus leant back so he could look up into Sirius' eyes. He said, "You really need a wash."

Sirius laughed softly, looking at Remus. "You looked at yourself lately?"

Remus looked down and saw that his clothes and hands were also covered in dirt. He shook his head and stood up, pulling Sirius to his feet. He spun him towards the house and marched him inside to get a shower.


The next day

Sirius apparated inside the Potters' house, in the kitchen right beside James. He growled at him, "I really wish you'd stop doing that!"

"It's quicker! I won't next time – don't kill me!"

James grinned. "Don't want to. Not today. Nothing could put me in a bad mood … within reason. Don't push your luck."

Sirius frowned. "Why? What happened?"

"Well – " James began but was cut off by a scream of "James, when I get over this bloody morning sickness, you're dead!"

Sirius frowned. "Morning sickness? That sounds … interesting!"

"It isn't a good thing. She's tetchy; sick all the time – why do they call it morning sickness when it's all the time? – has really bad mood swings … well you get the picture, right?"

Sirius grinned. "James! You're going to have a baby and you never told me!"

"Well it's not like it's yours, is it?" James growled.

"How long's she been pregnant for then?" Sirius asked, still grinning insanely and sounding hysterical. James scowled. "A month. It's hell. How can I stand nine months of this?"

Lilly screamed something unintelligible. James winced. "Look, I'd better go see if she's OK. Back in a minute."

Five minutes later, Lilly came downstairs, scowling, on James' arm. "Hello."

"Hi. How're you feeling?"

"Like crap," Lilly replied, punching James on the arm. "Thanks to him!"

"Oh, you're in trouble, Jamie!" Sirius said, grinning insanely. James jumped at Sirius and grabbed his shoulders to shake him hard. "Don't call me that! Shut up!"

Sirius pushed him off. "Ah, leave me alone; I was joking."

James let him go and sat down next to Lilly. She elbowed him in the stomach and said to Sirius, "Don't ever get pregnant! Ever!"

"Like I could anyway. But come on, be realistic – surely the kid'll be worth it," Sirius replied, trying to be comforting. Lilly looked at him.

"Sirius, I'll believe that when I've got it in my arms. Now go away; I feel ill again," Lilly said threateningly. Sirius held up his hands and picked up his coat. "I'm going, I'm going!"

With that, he apparated back home. "Moony! Guess what?"

The werewolf was in the living room, totally engrossed in a book. Sirius grinned. Remus glanced up, not really seeing Sirius, still concentrating on whatever he was reading. "What?"

"James is having a baby."

"Oh, that's – WHAT!"


The next day

"Well," said Sirius. "We're here."

Remus looked up at the building in front of them. It was a shabby-looking block of flats – at least from the outside. Suddenly, a van drove past down the dilapidated, North London street, drenching them both in slush from the gutter. Sirius yelled after him, "Merry Christmas to you too!"

"Leave it," Remus told him softly, looking around warily before pulling out his wand and casting a drying and cleaning spell on their clothes before they moved towards the door. There was a panel on the side of the door, waiting for a code to be punched in to open the door. Sirius tapped in the security code, which was on the letter, and they walked inside.

The inside of the building was painted white and silver. Above the front desk was the name of the charity – Parechobios – in magically glittering, silvery letters. Remus touched Sirius arm and nodded at the desk. Sirius took a deep breath and walked to the desk, Remus following him closely. He coughed to get the girl's attention and said, "We – we got a letter saying we could come down anytime today…"

She smiled and said, "OK, what're your names, please?"

They gave her their names and she looked at a list then stood up and said, "All right, please follow me and I'll take you to the consultant you've been allocated. Oh, and sorry it's so close to Christmas, and short notice. We're been moving premises. It's all very new, here."

"It looks it," Sirius muttered as she led them up the first flight of stairs and then down a long, white corridor to a door. She smiled again and said, "When you're ready just knock and go in. Good luck! And Merry Christmas!"

Once she was gone, they looked at each other nervously. Remus chewed on his bottom lip. Sirius glanced at the door. "We've got to go in there sometime."

The werewolf nodded in reply. He swallowed hard. "I'm worried …"

Sirius smiled and stroked his cheek. "I know. Me too."

Remus' lips twitched in a smile. He turned to the door and knocked. A witch a couple of inches shorter than Remus with curly chestnut hair to her shoulders and brown eyes opened the door and grinned at them. "Hi, my name's Christine Skeeter. Please, call me Chris. Merry Christmas. Come on in; make yourself at home."

The room beyond was much more homely than the rest of the building. There was a sturdy pine desk with, ironically enough for a Wizarding place, a computer sitting on it, buzzing gently. There were several files open on the desk and an open filing cabinet behind it. On the walls, which were painted a very pale shade of lilac, were pictures – mostly landscapes, but there was a family portrait. Sirius walked over to it. Remus asked, "Have we met before?"

She smiled. "Yeah, I went to Hogwarts same as you. I was in Ravenclaw. I was in the year below."

Sirius, recognising another person on the photograph, asked, "You're not related to Rita Skeeter, are you?"

Chris sighed, her amazing smile fading into a scowl. "Yeah, she's my sister. We don't talk much. She writes that horrible gossip column in the Prophet. I don't like what she does, you know. She writes a lot of stuff about you two."

"I know," Remus growled. "I wish she'd lay off."

Chris sighed again, rubbing her forehead. "I've told her to stop it, but she ignores me. Most of the things she writes are packs of lies. Hardly anyone reads that column, and if they do they read it for its humorous qualities. They don't believe half the stuff she puts. Anyway, we're not here to discuss my sister – please have a seat."

They sat down opposite her at the desk and she pulled out one of the files. "So. Down to buisness. Any questions, before I give you the usual talk on what exactly happens and everything?"

Remus took a deep breath and asked, "Does … does it really work for most people? W-whatever it is you do?"

Chris smiled gently and nodded. "Usually, yes, it does work well. I volunteered to help just after I left Hogwarts, and since then, personally, I've had two cases that haven't been successful, and when we've tried a second time it worked. I've worked with ten couples so far. That's an eighty percent success rate with me, and a hundred percent if we include second attempts."

"That's pretty good. Thanks. Um … what about me being a – a werewolf?"

Chris' smile didn't even flicker, and she didn't pause. Sirius gave her extra mental brownie points. Not many were unfazed by Remus' lycanthropy. "Doesn't matter to us. You're just a person, like anyone else. Being a werewolf isn't anything to do with us, is it? It doesn't affect anything we need to do, apart from that we can't do anything to you on the day of a full moon."

Remus' lips twitched into a smile. "You – you said you'd go into detail, now …"

Chris smiled and bit her lip. "You know, out of all the things I have to do, explaining this is the hardest. It's dead easy to understand, but … explaining is difficult. OK, anything you don't get, just interrupt … First off we take some of your sex cells, while you're under anaesthetic. Then we split them into two equal halves and put them back together, basically. So each of the cells has half of each of your genetic information. With me so far? Good. Then we introduce you to – in your case – the surrogate mother. See, we can't create miracles, so we still need the female sex cells."

"So how do you know the right person?" Remus asked tentatively. Chris steepled her fingers and paused for a second. "Well, the best thing would be someone you know, a friend or something. But if we can't get a volunteer from them, we introduce you to a couple of the people who say they'd like to help. Then you choose one of them and we take some of her eggs. The sex cells are combined and we put the embryos into her womb. We usually put two embryos into the womb, because there's more chance of one of them surviving. Of course, you could be blessed with twins, couldn't you? Then it's a normal pregnancy for nine months."

Sirius asked, "What if it all goes wrong?"

"We can try again, if you want to – or not, if you prefer. It's completely up to you," she replied softly, smiling reassuringly. Sirius leant back in his chair, looking over at Remus. The werewolf asked, /So what d'you think?/

/You know what I think. I think we should sign whatever papers she wants us to and go for it,/ Sirius replied. Remus bit back a laugh. /OK./

/You tell her, then./

/Wait – how much is this going to cost?/

Sirius shrugged, earning himself an inquiring frown from Chris. He turned to her and asked, "How much do we have to pay for this?"

She grinned. "This is a charity, so we pay for the first time through – apart from the anaesthetics, which have to be Muggle ones, because of the magic we have to use. That makes it quite pricey. And there is a but – if it doesn't work, it could cost you much more. First time round, it comes to … sixty galleons."

Sirius blinked in surprise. "I thought you were going to say more!"

Chris' smile widened. "That's the beauty of us being a charity."

Remus touched Sirius' arm. He asked quietly, "Can we afford that?"

Sirius reached over and stroked his cheek. "Course we can."

Remus closed his eyes, leaning into Sirius' fingers. Sirius smiled gently and tickled the sensitive place behind Remus' ear. The werewolf twitched away, jerking his eyes open. Sirius smirked. /Always could make you squirm!/

Remus punched his arm, albeit gently. /Stop it!/

Chris coughed to get their attention, although she was grinning insanely. "If you want more time to think it over, then fine. All you have to do is sign here, both of you, and we'll sort out a good date for you both."

Sirius glanced over at Remus. The werewolf took a deep breath and reached for the pen.


A month later (early January, in case you even care)

"Well that was … interesting," Sirius commented, taking Remus' coat to hang it up. Remus sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. "Sirius, you were unconscious. So was I. How is this interesting?"

Sirius shrugged, rubbing his forehead. They had just got home from the first step of the process that would make them parents. Remus was on edge, and therefore tense; it didn't improve Sirius' mood. The werewolf leant against the wall and sighed. Sirius walked over to him and took hold of his shoulders. "It's OK. They said everything was fine."

Remus shook his head, frowning deeply. Sirius kissed his forehead. "What's the matter?"

"It's … it's the mother. We haven't got any friends who'd be willing to do something like that. Hell, Sirius, we've got hardly any friends!"

The animagus pulled him into his arms and whispered, "It's OK; there's got to be someone …"

"Yeah, but – "

Remus was interrupted by an owl swooping in and perching on Sirius' shoulder. It had a letter in its beak. Remus took it and slit it open, while the owl started to preen itself. He said, "Sirius, it's from that girl who shared a dorm with Lilly."

"Remus, there were four girls sharing with Lilly!"

"The Irish one with the funny name, Blade O'Neill. Apparently her husband was killed in a Death Eater attack while she was pregnant and then the baby died."

"Why's she telling us this?" Sirius asked, sighing and running his fingers through his hair. Remus threw him an annoyed look. "If you'll let me finish!"

Sirius shut up. Remus continued, "She says when she lost the baby she applied to the charity so she could help other people who couldn't have children. She hasn't done anything yet, thought … She was talking to Chris a month or so ago at the Christmas party and she mentioned us and Blade said she'd contact us, so do we want to meet her."

"Oh."

"So shall we meet her?"

"Well at least we kind of know her. I think I went out with her once."

"I did. For about a month. Then she kind of noticed I kept staring at you."

Sirius grinned. "Well, I am a nice thing to look at, right?"

"Sirius, you don't need me to tell you that. You know it already," Remus smiled. "I'll write back and ask if we can meet some time."


(A/N: That was, to put it bluntly, boring as hell. I just re-read it and guess what? It's official – this is the chapter I hate the most. It's really bad. I like the beginning and kind of the end, but the middle is terrible. I suppose 'coz of all the explaining … anyway.

I think people can actually go through this process. I seem to remember that some friends of David and Victoria Beckham did it and have some children. But my memory might just be crap. And if it's a load of rubbish, then think of it as a commodity of witches and wizards. They can fiddle with a car and make it fly; they have blood-replenishing potions; they can grow bones back – who says they can't do this!

60 galleons – that's just under £200 (don't know about dollars, because I can't do the conversion) if my calculations are correct. I'm not promising they are, mind you. They could be loads of rubbish. Tell me if you disagree. Also I haven't got a clue how much anaesthetics cost, so don't tell me it's too expensive/too cheap.

Oh, in case you even care about the charity name, Parechobios (Parr-ek-oh-by-os), it's Ancient Greek: Parecho = (I) give, Bios = life. It's kind of crappy and sad, but there you go. That's just me.

Boy was that a long author's note! REVIEW, please! Please! Even flames will be graciously received for this one.)