Jay and Silent Bob vs. The Labyrinth
Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters; the characters within the Labyrinth belong to Jim Henson, and Jay, Silent Bob, Dante, and Randall belong to Kevin Smith. This story however, is a figment of my imagination.
AN: Thanks again for all the kind reviews...I am having fun with this story...hope you all enjoy!!! Please leave me a review!!! Don't forget to check out my
Chapter 3 – "Bo...Bo...Bo...Boom! Certain death!"
Sarah stood, finally getting her giggles under control as she brushed herself off. She grabbed Jay's hand and pulled him up, signaling him it was time to keep moving. She quickly found the opening she had previously been looking for and stepped through into the dusty concrete part of the Labyrinth where the tile trolls live.
"Your freaky-ass boyfriend had to show up and ruin the party again."
"He's not my boyfriend."
"Could've fooled me, you cream your pants whenever he shows up."
"I do NOT cream my pants. Do you have to be so vulgar?"
Jay ignored her question and quickly changed the subject...somewhat.
"That dude doesn't wear any underwear...his meat is all rubbing up on his tights."
"What??!! How do you know that?"
"It's pretty obvious, it was all wiggly and shit, no restraint at all. Dude he'd be pitching a tent if you told him you'd fuck..."
Sarah cut Jay off before he could even finish his sentence, "Why were you studying his crotch?? Hmm??"
"I don't...what? It was all up in my face...a little hard not to notice...like you weren't getting hot over it."
"I was too busy laughing to notice, sorry."
"Just admit it, you think he's sexy and you want his hot beef injection."
Sarah laughed and blushed a little, but not quite enough to give her away.
"I do NOT!"
"Why can't you just admit it? It's written all over your face!"
Sarah sighed.
"I can think of something else he'd like to put all over your face!"
"You're so gross!! Just drop it okay!"
"Fine by me. If you want his cock and can't admit it, no skin off my nuts. In the mean time, feel free to take out your sexual frustration on me."
"No thanks, I'm good."
"Just thought I'd offer."
Jay finished the last of his joint and dropped the roach on the concrete ground. As they passed by, a small tile troll came out yelling and took the roach back inside of his home beneath the tiles. A minute later, smoke was filing out from the cracks around the tile and a small giggle echoed through the concrete maze.
"What was that?"
"Beats the fuck out of me, this place gives me the creeps like a bad acid trip."
As they followed the direction of the pointing hands, they ended up in a dead end with the shield holding guards.
"The only way out of here is to try one of these doors!" sniggered one of the shield guards.
Sarah cut them off, "Yes, I know...one leads to the castle and the other one leads to certain death. Oh, and one of you always tells the truth and the other one always lies."
"Correct! But which one will you choose??" Asked the guard.
"I can't remember which one I picked last time...I know I ended up in an oubliette though.
"Come on, which door?" The guards taunted.
Jay looked at the shield guards in utter confusion...which end was up?
"These mother fuckers have heads coming out their assholes too?" Jay asked Sarah utterly confused by the guards appearance.
"Look at your attire you sniveling bloke! You look like an oversized troll yourself!" one of the guards spat back at Jay when he overheard Jay's comment to Sarah. The Guards on the undersides poked their heads out, pointing at Jay and laughing.
"That's it you riddle talking mother fuckers...keep the insults coming...I'll slit your throats and shit down your neck!!"
The guards froze and stared at Jay looking completely horrified. Sarah turned to Jay and offered quietly, "Was that really necessary?"
"What?" Jay managed after Sarah shook her head in disapproval.
Pulling Jay behind her, Sarah approached the guards and apologized for Jay's rudeness as she once again picked the WRONG door.
