Jay and Silent Bob vs. The Labyrinth

Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters; the characters within the Labyrinth belong to Jim Henson, and Jay, Silent Bob, Dante, and Randall belong to Kevin Smith. This story however, is a figment of my imagination

AN: I have reworked chapter 9, so I would like you all to please re-read it, because it will now flow smoothly into the next chapter. I didn't change much, but I added a little bit of a different ending, and I added a teeny bit the fantasy part.


Chapter 9 – Flesh For Fantasy

Sarah opened her eyes and looked around slowly. She recognized the ballroom as being the same as the one she had been in the last time, except there were no masked dancers. There were still large mirrors adorning the walls and assorted beads and pearls hanging from the ceiling. Sarah looked down, expecting to see the large frilly ball gown, instead the sight the greeted her eyes was not at all what she had expected. Sarah was pretty much nude, with the exception of the sequined pasties that covered her nipples, and the red shiny hot pants.

Sarah reached down to cover herself in surprise when she looked across the room and spotted Jay. He was nestled contently in the pillow pit, scantily clad as well, surrounded by...wait a sec...it couldn't be...Guys??? There were several guys scantily clad in black leather, all wearing dog collars around their necks, fawning over Jay.

"What the??! What kind of dream IS this?"

"Sarah...."

Sarah spun around and found herself face to face with Jareth. He looked down and smirked as he saw her attire...or lack there of. Sarah modestly covered herself as best she could and held her chin high.

"What is all this?"

"This is Jay's fantasy, Sarah."

"His...fantasy? But...But...he is surrounded by...GUYS!"

"Yes, I know."

"But...Why?"

"It's very simple, Sarah. This is a fantasy realm. Everything the mind truly desires, however uninhibited can exist here."

"So, what you're telling me is...Jay is...GAY?"

"Yes."

"How come he was constantly badgering me to sleep with him then?"

"Simple. He was ashamed. He didn't want anyone to know what he really felt, so he hid it as best he could."

"So...let me get this straight...we are in Jay's fantasy right now."

"Yes."

"Jay is Gay."

"Yes."

"So, why am I dressed liked this? He obviously isn't interested in me!"

"Ah...That I must confess, was my doing." Jareth admitted with a smirk.

Sarah blushed and thought for a moment...

"If this is a fantasy world, Last time, we were in my fantasy...right?

"Yes...the truly innocent fantasy of a 15 year old girl...all you wanted was to dance with your Prince."

"So, that means you knew what I was thinking then..."

"Yes. It also means you should thank your friend, because if he hadn't eaten the peaches first, we would be partaking in YOUR fantasy right now...Your ADULT fantasy..."

Sarah gasped. She hadn't even thought about what would've happened if she had eaten the peach first. She thought to herself, 'Remind me to thank Jay...we would've been in a porno right about now..."

"We don't have much time, I have to go wake him."

"Do you really want to do that? He so looks as if he is enjoying himself...you could be too you know..."

"Ah...I don't think now is the BEST time...I have to go."

Jareth once again watched Sarah walk away determined to break the spell.

"So determined...we will meet again my love...you are only delaying the inevitable." Jareth whispered as he watched her run towards Jay.

"Jay! Get up! We have to go...Silent Bob Needs you!"

"Who? What are you talking about? I am about to get busy!"

"Oh, God, I wish you hadn't just said that...Ok, we are leaving...NOW."

Sarah scanned the room and locked eyes with Jareth, slightly pleading for him to help her.

Jareth slowly started to walk across the room towards them, and that is when Jay spotted him.

"Who is THAT???" Jay asked in awe.

Sarah looked horrified as she realized Jay was checking out Jareth.

"Ahh...oh...hmm." Sarah stammered not knowing how to handle the interesting turn of events.

When Jareth approached them, he simply pulled out a crystal in thin air and stated, "This is not real. It is an illusion of fantasy, as you were." The crystal shattered like a bubble, and Sarah and Jay found themselves drifting down into a massive junk pile.

Jay stirred and sat up, looking over to see if Sarah was okay.

"Oh man...I had the most FUCKED up Dream..."

Sarah looked at Jay and shook her head. She wasn't sure if he realized that she really did know what went on in his dream, because she really was there. She decided it would be better to keep quiet and pretend she didn't know anything.

"Yeah, I had a weird dream too...I dreamt I was in a giant donut, rolling down a hill towards a...a... Jellyfish farm."

Jay relaxed a little; thinking that Sarah's appearance in his dream was just a coincidence.

"Dude, I had this dream, I was in this huge ballroom right, and there were all these hot chicks rubbing me down with oil. They were primed too...next thing I know I remember seeing this gorgeous Blond walking towards me from across the room. I swear, all the other chicks in the room couldn't hold a candle to that one..."

Sarah choked back a laugh realizing that Jay had spotted Jareth in his fantasy, and obviously had an attraction to him...a strong one at that.

"Must've been a real beauty." Sarah managed with a straight face.

"Oh hell yeah...I would've loved to get her alone..." Jay said.

Sarah looked away, trying desperately not to burst out laughing. If there was ever a time to get the upper hand on Jay's mouth, this was it.

"Jay, I don't know if you want to...but I'm having a hard time controlling my...uh...urges, you know? Do you think maybe you might want to, you know, get it on with me? Like now?" Sarah asked Jay hoping against hope that Jay's fantasy was accurate.

"Uh...what!?...now?!?" Jay asked her nervously.

Sarah moved closer to Jay and held her breath so she didn't have to smell the bog, and she ran her hands over his chest seductively.

"Sarah, what are you doing??!!?"

"I thought that you wanted this?" Sarah asked innocently.

"Well, I ah..." Jay stammered.

"What?" Sarah asked waiting for Jay's defeat.

"I'm just holding out for that sexy blond bitch I saw in my dream. I'm pretty sure she's real...If so, I'd much rather bang her. But if we were gonna die or something, I'd fuck ya."

Sarah almost burst out laughing, knowing that Jay was clearly flustered. It was true, he didn't want her because he was holding out for Jareth!! Sarah could only imagine what Jareth's reaction would be to hearing this one...