I paced nervously around the living room as I waited for Craig to come. My hair hung in ringlets around my face, and my make-up had been done by my mom earlier. The feelings I had for Craig were genuine. They were sincere. As I saw Craig walking up the sidewalk, a nervous feeling sank into the pit of my stomach. He was wearing a white button up shirt, un-tucked, with a white sports coat over it and a pair of black slacks. He looked amazing.
Craig and I were at the dance, having a good time. We were dancing every so often and then sitting on the side to talk. A few songs played that didn't really describe our relationship, but they were still pretty. Like, Suddenly, by O-town. I think it described how Craig felt about Ashley, but its just a guess.
She said it wasn't my fault
She said we gave it our all
And she walked away
I never saw the girls I spoke to, no
But tell me is there something I can do
Leave another message on the telephone
And you're parked outside with your headlights on
Suddenly I'm standing at your door
And the steps don't feel like they did before
The radio's playing loud but it's not our song
Suddenly he's all alone with you
He's looking in your eyes like I wanted to
I knock four times and pretend you're not at home
Suddenly I'm all alone
Suddenly I'm all alone
She said it wasn't the same (she said it wasn't the same)
You said our life's been so plain
Then she walked away
Want to make things brand new
Tell me is there something I can do, whoa
Leave another message on the telephone
And you're parked outside with your headlights on
Suddenly I'm standing at your door
And the steps don't feel like they did before
The radio's playing loud but it's not our song
Suddenly he's all alone with you
He's looking in your eyes like I wanted to
I knock four times and pretend you're not at home
Suddenly I'm all alone
Suddenly I'm all alone...
Suddenly I'm all alone...
The radio's playing...the radio's playing...
Suddenly I'm all alone...
The radio's playing loud but it's not our song
Yeah yeah yeah yeah
Suddenly I'm standing at the door
And the steps don't feel like they did before
The radio's playing loud but it's not our song
Suddenly I'm all alone with her
She's everything that I wish you were
You knock four times and pretend I'm not at home
Suddenly I'm standing at the door
And the steps don't feel like they did before
The radio's playing loud but it's not our song (but it's not our song)
Suddenly I'm all alone with her
She's everything that I wish you were
You knock four times and pretend I'm not at home
Suddenly I'm standing at your door
And the steps don't feel like they did before
The radio's playing loud but it's not our song (not our song, oh)
Suddenly I'm all alone with her
She's everything that I wish you were
You knock four times and pretend I'm not at home
As the song ended, Craig and I left the dance floor. I spotted Ashley across the room. Feeling guilty about being at the dance with her ex-boyfriend, I told Craig I had to use the restroom and went to talk to her.
"Ash, can I have a minute?" I said, taking her by the arm and gently pulling her from the room.
"Yeah, Paige. What's going on?"
"I feel really bad."
"About..."
"Are you okay with this Craig and me situation? Because if you're not, then let me know and I'll call it off."
"Don't be ridiculous, Paige. Of course I'm okay with it. You remember that question I asked you a while ago?"
"Yeah?"
"Well...he told me he loves me."
"Aw, Ash, that's so sweet."
"That's not all, though." She pulled me into the girls washroom so we could talk more privately. "He asked me to marry him!"
I almost fainted. "He...he what?"
"He said that he loves me and that he doesn't want love to just pass him by. Then he proposed."
"Ash, that's terrific! I'm so happy for you." I hugged her.
"I haven't told Mom yet, but I know she'll be happy for us. But anyway, I wanted to tell you something. Devon proposing to me made me realize how fragile and how rare true love really is. The way Devon looks at me, the way his hand touches mine, its amazing, Paige, and it's the same with you and Craig. I've seen the way you look at him and the way he looks at you. He is in love with you."
Her words made me cry. I know it sounds ridiculous, but it is unexplainable.
"I want you to go find Craig," she ordered. "Get him out of here and tell him that you love him too. He's a great guy, Paige. Don't lose him."
I opened my mouth to protest but she shushed my with her hand.
"Go talk to him."
I smiled and left the washroom.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Craig and I walked through the door of his house. The house was deserted and dark. Craig turned a light on and led me up the stairs.
"Craig," I started. But the words fled from me. We sat on his bed. "You were always there for me, Craig. When I was so upset, when I was depressed. When I was horrified, you were there. You were there for me. when I needed you the most, you were there. I love you Craig. I mean it, I really mean it. I love you."
"I love you too, Paige. You understand me like no one else could. When I was afraid or sad about how my dad used to be, people were like, 'That's in the past. Why can't you just get over it?' but you understand that it isn't that easy. I fell in love with you the moment I realized how sweet, and how compassionate you are.''
I kissed him. One thing led to another and clothes were discarded and thrown on the floor. I didn't stop him this time because I knew that it was right. I knew I loved him. That was all that mattered.
I was vaguely aware of the sound of the door opening downstairs as Craig and I sat up to get re-dressed.
About that time, the door burst open and Caitlin was standing in the doorway. She had bags in her hands and her jaw was dropped. She walked back out and closed the door without saying anything.
I sighed and threw my dress on. I leaned my head against Craig's shoulder and sighed. "You don't think she's upset do you?" I asked.
"Nah," he said. "I'm sixteen. I can do what I want."
"I should go," I said, realizing it was one in the morning.
"I'll call you."
I smiled and ran out the door. I didn't stop running until I got home and opened the front door. Mom's car wasn't in the driveway, so she was probably out with what's-his-face. Dylan was on the couch in front of the television, like always."Hey, you're home pretty late. Have fun at the dance?"
"Yeah, I had a great time." I tried to hide the embarrassment flooding into my cheeks.
"You slept with him didn't you?" he asked, a weird look of suspiscion in his eyes. Like his little sister was growing up.
"What? You're crazy."
"You smell like sex. You look like sex. Better take a shower before Mom gets home." He called after me as I walked up the stairs to my bedroom.
I changed out of my dress and into a pair of shorts and a t-shirt. I climbed into bed and was asleep within minutes.
I awoke to the sound of the phone ringing. Drowsily, I picked up the phone and muttered 'hello'.
"Paige? It's Caitlin. Could we talk?"
"Yeah. Want to meet me at the coffee house in about thirty minutes?"
"That would be great. Talk to you then."
I climbed out of bed and into the shower. The water woke me up and the events of last night were still in my mind. When I was done in the shower I blow-dried my hair and pulled on a hooded sweatshirt and a pair of jeans with sneakers.
I walked down the street to the coffee house and saw Caitlin already seated inside.
"Hey," I said gently, walking up to her and taking a seat across the table from her.
"Hi. I'm really sorry about walking in on you and Craig the other day."
"Don't worry about it." I nervously ran my fingers through my hair. "What did you want to talk about?"
"I just wanted to let you know that I understand."
"Understand?"
"Yes. I understand what its like to love someone and to want to be with them. I don't have a problem with your relationship with Craig. But I do want you to be safe. You have a lot going for you, Paige. You don't want to mess that up."
I shook my head. "No, I don't."
"You're going to play it safe, aren't you?" she said. "I mean, if its birth control you need, I can take you to get it. I just know how hard it was on Spike, being a single teenage mother."
"Thank you for your concern. If I need anything I'll tell you."
