Author: Sparkle Itamashii
Title: Stay with Me
Warnings: Respect the rating. Please see profile for details.
Disclaimer: Gundam Wing AC is NOT MINE.
"I believe in love surviving death into eternity…"
Chapter Five
Vertigo, seizing mind and body; falling, dropping like a rock to a howling river.
Warm hand…
Icy water racing upwards, hungry for blood; impact-
I shouted, struggling out from under the sheets in which I'd become entangled. My breath came in ragged, painful gasps, burning my lungs like I hadn't been breathing for several minutes. I felt dizzy. One hand flew to my head, covering my eyes as I tried to orient myself. Startled at the wetness around my eyes, I withdrew my hands, confused.
Had I been crying?
I groaned, rolling from the bed and closing my eyes as tightly as I could. Crying would definitely explain the headache that was coming on now that I was moving. I felt awful; like I'd been put through a wringer. I hated waking up like that because it always left me feeling like shit for hours afterwards.
When I'd been a little kid I used to have recurring dreams; terrifying dreams where I would be completely exhausted, standing on the edge of a cliff with someone I couldn't see. With only a few seconds' pause we would jump.
The plunge itself never woke me- hitting the raging torrent of water below did. I'd been terrified of getting into water ever since I can remember because of that dream.
But I hadn't had those nightmares in years.
I really hoped they weren't going to become a problem again.
I moved to turn on the light so that I could find my way to the bathroom, but when I flicked it on the light sent spikes of pain into my head through my eyes. I hadn't even been drinking but it felt like a hangover of the worst kind. I quickly thought better of trying to light my way and plunged myself into darkness once more. I felt my way down the hall, hoping Quatre still kept his ibuprophen in the medicine cabinet on the wall- I'd never find it otherwise.
Just as I was crossing the hallway, movement caught my eye. At first I dismissed it, as I always do when I see Solo moving like a shadow through the house… until I realized that Quatre didn't have any pets. He was too clean to have animals, except for the large saltwater fish tank in the front room. We should've been the only two people in the house and he slept like a brick until his alarm went off at six.
It was only a little past four in the morning.
Standing completely still, I weighed the importance of fixing my headache against the importance of investigating and unfortunately for my head my curiosity won. I swiveled away from the door to the bathroom, still feeling a little sleep-drunk, and padded softly down the hallway in the opposite direction. I headed for the kitchen, knowing that the lights by the stove were softer than most others and I could turn them on without collapsing in pain. I reached the edge of the room and sought the switch with my fingers, flipping it up when I finally found it.
I barely contained my yelp of surprise at the figure standing across the kitchen, watching me with calm blue eyes.
"What are you doing here?" I hissed. "How did you get in?"
He sighed soundlessly and gave me a sad look, the corner of his mouth quirking in an apologetic smile. "I followed you. I came to say goodbye."
"You're leaving?" I asked cautiously, not moving.
His gaze dropped and hurt expression flickered over his features. "Yeah."
"F-for good?" I stammered, almost begging him to say no.
"Yeah." He whispered, not raising his eyes.
"Will you…" I inquired softly, pleading, "at least tell me why before you go? I'm confused, Heero. I know you, or I did, but I can't remember and it hurts." I let my voice drop so my words fell on a breath. "You're hurting me."
He closed his eyes, his jaw clenching and his brow furrowing deeply as he tamped down whatever reaction he was having. "I can't." He said at last, with a little shake of his head. "Shinigami is coming soon and he'd be furious if I said anything I wasn't supposed to say."
I struggled, racking my brain for the small amount of Japanese that I had learned in high school. It had been far too long, though. I couldn't match that to anything. I had a sinking feeling that I wouldn't want to know, even if I could have remembered.
"Shinigami?"
Those startlingly blue eyes met mine in the dim light of the kitchen. "You know… Death."
My breath caught as I stared at him, wide eyed. If he wasn't dead yet, how was he always around? How did I pass through him last night in the alley? If he was still alive that meant… but if he was telling the truth and death was coming for him…
"Don't go." I begged when I found my voice. "If you don't go-"
"He'll find me." I saw him heave a sigh of regret but it made no noise. He traversed the couple paces that separated us and stopped inches away from me. "Where-ever I am. I can no more hide from him than I can touch you."
Very gently he reached up with one hand, laying it icily along my cheek as he leaned forward. I shivered as his cold lips brushed along mine, not truly touching them. It was strange, not feeling any pressure, only the frosty, biting sensation of the connection. I closed my eyes, allowing the sensation to envelop my mind, and felt tears prickle along my eyelashes. This was so unfair…
He pulled away after a few seconds, eyes opening only halfway as he looked at me. "I'm so sorry."
I bit my lip, trying to breathe around the lump in my throat. Closing my eyes, I brought my hand to my cheek, ignoring the iced feeling that clutched at the skin of my fingers when they passed through him. I didn't care how cold I got. I'd freeze to death if I thought it would keep him here with me. Gradually warmth began seeping back into my flesh and I could feel my own fingers resting on my jaw.
When I opened my eyes again, he was gone.
I sank to my knees, falling forward and letting my forearms knock against the tile floor as I curled in on myself. God, what was I doing? I'd fallen in love with a ghost of a boy I'd never met yet knew on a deeper level than I'd ever thought possible.
And now…
No.
There had to be something I could do. I knew he wasn't dead yet. Maybe I still had time. Maybe there was some way to stop his Shinigami, some way to strike a bargain. I'd never had a problem talking to gods before- okay, so they never answered but there's a first time for everything, right?
I struggled to my feet, scrubbing furiously at my eyes. I really had to keep it together better than this. Falling apart now wasn't going to do anyone, especially me, any good. I grabbed the receiver off the wall and dialed a familiar number, completely forgetting the time in my haste.
The phone clicked and shuffled, as though he was having trouble remembering how to use it. "Hullo?"
"His name's Heero." I spilled as soon as I heard his voice.
"Duo?" Howard asked sleepily, "It's four thirty in the morning. What-"
"You said you were looking into things at the local hospitals. Was there anyone by the name "Heero"?" I interrupted.
"Where are you?" He was quite obviously (and understandably) less awake than I. "I left a message with a list of names, didn't you get it?"
"I didn't go home last night; I went to Quatre's. I'm sorry to call so early, but I need to know."
Already I could hear him shuffling papers, grumbling names and words under his breath as he skimmed them aloud like he always did. Finally I heard a noise of triumph and he cleared his throat. "I thought I had it somewhere- Jenkinson County Hospital. Two boys were admitted a week and a half ago after a drunk-driving accident. Uh… Oh, one of them, the older one, woke up a few days ago but the other is still unconscious. His name is…" He paused, almost killing me with the suspense. "Oh, here we go. Heero Yuy."
I missed anything he said after that as the phone tumbled from my limp fingers.
Burning hands, trailing down heated flesh....Gasps, echoing in the dead of the night....
"I love you…"
Cold, damp walls feeling like they're closing , pushing to exhaustion and beyond....
"May the times accept us…"
Eyes like polished cobalt, full of love....Soft touches, whispered declarations....
"May we live side by side in the next world…"
Facing an invisible end, closing eyes and leaping blindly....Water, so much water everywhere, ripping and shredding everything to pieces....
"No matter where you are or how long it takes, I will find you again...."
I was distantly aware of Howard's voice, piping metallically from the phone as he called to me, but memory had taken a savage hold on me.
Oh yes, I knew Heero. I knew Heero better than anyone else could ever have known him. I'd followed him through death, past death, back into life again. I'd defied the separation of oblivion and met him in this new world, a time when we could be accepted for everything that we were… just like we had hoped.
I couldn't bear to lose him. Not again.
/End Chapter Five, Stay With Me/
Notes:
Oh come on people… I'm not yet lame enough that I'd make it so predictable as to have Heero be a ghost. Honestly… ::grin:: The real question is… what happens now? Does he make it? Does he NOT make it? Does he make it in time or is he already too late? ::flail:: I don't know yet so I guess we'll find out...
